NOT FADE AWAY

By: Sage 360

Disclaimer: M-X, Don't Own Them. Enjoy!

Thanks for all the great reviews and emails! Just to ease some doubts, I'm still the SB fan you know and love. This is just a fun- and realistic direction. Here's the next chapter.

ADMISSIONS

It was all enough to choke on. Adam right in front of them, Jesse now knowing about Lexa and Brennan and Shalimar angry at everyone. What would have seemed as the perfect moment for their leader to arrive now sat like a hangover on a morning after. All of them were sick to their stomach with emotion.

Jesse stepped forward, now eyeing the brunette and again, his face said it all. Moving past Adam, he headed right for the woman, yanking her along till they reached his room. The door slammed so hard, it nearly broke.

"BRENNAN!" He yelled directly in her face. "You kissed Brennan!"

Oddly enough, she wasn't afraid. In fact, the woman stood crossed- armed before him. "Jess, we were undercover."

"I bet!"

"Y'know, you and I are not together. My God! You act like you own me."

"Oh, I don't own you, Lexa. You have no problem giving it out to the rest of the world!"

Her eyes blazed into the molecular's. "I only slept with Blake. Brennan happened because he cut contact with us and I had to reconnect. Shalimar was already out snooping, so someone could have made her."

"It's not the action, Lex. It's the reason. You did Blake to detach from losing Leo!"

"Jess!"

"And you kissed Brennan to detach from me! What is it with you and 'feelings'-"

"Jesse!" She managed, finally halting the man. "It's easier to 'live my life' without emotion -you know that."

"News flash, Pierce! That is no longer your life! You are on a 'team'- whooo, scary concept. I don't doubt you went into that club just to connect, but something else happened inside. It was enough that you two argued about it and it was enough that you BOTH chose not to tell. And Brennan keeps nothing from Shalimar. Nothing!"

The woman rolled her eyes at that. "Jesse, we kissed. Maybe a few times more than necessary, but that's it! If I'm so much trouble, why don't you walk away?"

Stuffing his hands in his pockets to avoid punching the wall, he grimaced. "That's a damn good question...And you know what? Starting now, I'm gonna take your advice." The man stormed past her, phasing through the bedroom door .Lexa knew it'd be a long while. Professionally, Jesse leaving was right. Emotionally, she kicked her own ass.

In the large corridor, he blazed by them. The elemental turned to face his teammate, his brother. But his face said it all. For once, the elemental stepped away from the molecular. Suddenly, Jesse had no problem going up against him.

Put it was Shalimar who pulled him back. Grabbing the man's arm, she pulled Brennan to the side, leaving a stunned Adam behind. Her eyes swam with hurt and realization.

"Shalimar..." He bagan. "Shal, I-"

"I can't."

Dark eyes narrowed in concern at the blonde, wanting nothing more than to destroy her pain. It was a tall order since he was the cause. "Can't what, love?"

"I can't do 'this'...This 'thing' with you. Every time I think we get close, something -someone gets in the way."

"Shalimar-"

"The thing is," She sniffled. "You let them get in too easily, Brennan. Do you even know what you want?"

It was an honest question. One that kept him awake sometimes. He had asked himself over and over and just when the man thought he knew, something would happen to make him step back. Truth was he was looking for an answer he could believe. How could he tell her when he didn't know himself? "I don't want this 'tension' between us, Shall."

"This tension!" She gasped. "This 'tension' starts every time you 'end up' sleeping around !"

"Shal, calm down. I never meant to hurt you. But you never exactly drew a line for us, or said what you wanted. It's not like I'm psycic!"

"No, you have to have a brain to be that."

His eyes rolled at the cheap shot. "Look, I hurt you and I'm sorry, but if you don't speak up and let me know what's going on with us, I can't follow your -guidelines. If I'd known you wanted a relationship, I'd-"

"You'd what, Brennan? Marry me right now?"

The dark eyes flashed right then, regarding the face before him. "I would."

"Well, 'forgive me' is I don't believe you. Adam saved your ass before, but not now. I'm tired of this 'game', I'm tired of hurting when you're with someone and I'm tired of waiting for you to get it straight. If you want Lexa, she's yours." The feral snatched away form the hand gripping her arm.

"Shalimar, you can't-"

"Just don't get too attached. She likes to keep things open." Walking away, she'd done what her conscious said to or almost three years. Breaking the connection to an indecisive man was empowering, but it was also breaking her heart. Keeping her back turned, she moved towards the only place she knew was safe -right into the arms of her 'father'. In the back of her mind, she and Brennan would never be finished.

It was late when Jesse returned to the rock. He knew no one would be waiting and right then, it was the safest thing. The drive had done him good, putting into perspective what truly happened. And while he couldn't make excuses for Lexa, somehow part of her didn't know it was self -destructive. His mind swam at the very thought.

"Finally back."

He looked up to see Shalimar sitting on the stairs. her hands hugged around a mug of something warm. It was obvious that she'd talked to Brennan -and obvious she wanted to forget it.

"Bring one for me?" Jesse grinned as he lowered beside her. Seeing the smile on her face, though weak was enough right then.

"Nope, but I'll share."

"Thanks, but no. Right now, I feel like something stiffer than tea."

The feral giggled at him, relaxing into that 'safety' they shared. "Same here."

"So, where's Adam?"

"He's actually asleep...God, I can't believe he's really 'here'."

"Me either," Jesse replied. "Its unreal, y'know?"

"Yeah...Jess...Hear me out." Shalimar warned. The molecular looked at her before reclining back onto the stairs. His blue eyes rolled at the conversation. "I think you and Brennan should talk."

"Shalimar, he kissed Lexa. Those two are nothing but storms of sexual energy -who knows what else they've done."

"Adam said nothing happened, and I believe him." She started. Her lowered head said the rest.

"But," Jesse finished for her. "You don't think there's a chance for you and Brennan."

"No....Not any more." The feral whispered. He wrapped an arm around her, pulling the woman close. "God,, Jess, I'm just so tired. It's like he's daring me to tell him to stop."

"Yeah, I know."

"But," She replied. "He kept quiet to protect you. Brennan does see you as a brother. You two should-"

"It won't be tonight." The molecular interrupted. "Just give it some time...what about you and Lex?"

Brown eyes rolled at that. "It's not exactly like we were close."

"I'm just sayin', this team is still here for a while. There's no way we'll break up anytime soon. So, we all have to work things out."

"Do you think if it were different -If you and I had kissed- that they'd react the same way?"

"No." Jesse grinned. "Brennan would just murder me while Lexa walked away. She'd plot to kill you later."

Shalimar laughed at his sarcasm. "That makes us safe."

"No shit." Jesse grinned. "Truthfully, it wasn't intentional. They got caught up. It's not like that never happened to us."

Shalimar faced him for the moment, truly thinking on his words. "You're right, Jess. Absolutely right." Against better judgment, her hand reached forward, bringing his face in contact with hers. Blue eyes snatched open in shock before closing to the moment. Shalimar was kissing him. Him, of all people. Reflex snapped in, holding the woman back. "Shal?" He asked. "What was that?"

"Oh....I don't know." The feral grinned. "Maybe, just a little 'revenge." It didn't hit him right then, but she was all too aware. The action, that moment set forth a wave of anger never before readable to her senses. This one moment while justified, also allowed her to understand what just may have gone through Brennan and Lexa that night. It was dizzying. Head and heart collided in what was easier and what was right. The idea of them knowing was a battle she had to face, and there wasn't much time to spare -since Brennan had seen it all.