*Smiles* I got more reviews, yeah! :)

Also, if you check out my bio, you'll find that this is the most successful fic yet!

OK, so none of my fics have ten or more reviews, is that true? Yes, it is at the moment so please, please, please review!

Thanks:

Captain 'Phoenix' Aquamarine: Thanks for reviewing again! And you what else? I'm in Leeds and it's boiling! :-p OK, it's not; you caught me! 

Ireth Lossehelin: I know I'm terrible aren't I?

Chocolate Taco: I know it's kind of strange but I wanted it to be funny!

Chesiere Cat: Wormtail won't bother you…..for now! *Laughs like a lunatic.*

Plot plunders

Sirius apparated back into the bathroom, (he left the bath in the Artic.) He was freezing; his lips were blue and his face was pure white. He quickly put on the bathrobe and ran back into Lily and James's room. So that's what they were planning, Thought Sirius, I'll get them, if it's the last thing I do, and it will probably be the last thing I do.

He put back on his robes, which were still dirty and smelly and discreetly came downstairs. Lily and Alice were watching a movie; Perfect. He took out his wand from his pocket and muttered a spell; tomorrow will be the best day of my life.

"Hey girls," he said cheerfully, "said any spells recently?" he was leaning over a settee that the girls were sitting on.

Lily gulped, "Hey Sirius," she laughed nervously, "you're not sore about what happened are you?"

"Of course not," assured Sirius, "it was an honest mistake, wasn't it?"

"Yeah," agreed Alice, "it was."

"So what're watching?" he asked trying not to sound suspicious.

"Oh, it's nothing," said Lily turning off the TV. "How about we go shopping?"

Sirius remembered James's words: "And whatever you do, don't take them shopping, the last thing I need is to be owing half the wizard population money."

"Sure," he said.

***

They all got ready, (it took twice as long because Alice kept asking for biscuits,) and apparated to discreet area near a shopping centre. Alice groaned, "What's wrong?" Sirius asked.

"Back pain," she replied, "has anyone got any biscuits?"

Lily rolled her eyes, "No, you ate them all."

Alice looked very green, "I think I'm going to be sick."

"Yuck!" said Sirius, "too much information!"

"Sirius!" shouted Lily, "who can you be so inconsiderate? It's OK Alice, you'll feel better; everyone always does."

Sirius was totally amazed by the massive mood swing.

Alice gave a weak smile, "There's some toilets not to far, I think I'll be able to make it."

Lily smiled back, "Good."

They just made it; the second Alice went inside she….well, I think you can guess what happened.

"Are you feeling better?" asked Sirius, Lily had made him promise not remind Alice of what happened. She nodded but she looked a little pale.

"Why don't we go to cinema?" asked Lily trying to brighten things up, "instead of shopping, after all, there's a movie which I know you'll love."

"Can you first tell me what a movie is?" asked Alice remembering how stupid she felt the first time Lily suggested it.

"Of course," said Lily, "remember when we were watching that box which had pictures that move and talk?" Alice nodded. "Well, this is exactly the same only there's no adverts and it's a lot longer."

Alice smiled at Lily and Sirius, "Do you want to, Sirius?" she asked as they walked over to the discreet area again

"Sure, I heard that they've got this great movie on," said Sirius.

"Does it by any chance have the title 'Hetres'?" asked Lily.

"Yes," replied Sirius.

"We are absolutely not seeing that movie!" shouted Lily.

"Why not?" asked Sirius and Alice.

"Because it's about fish!" retorted Lily.

"Sirius," began Alice, "why don't we just wait until we get there to pick out the movie?"

Sirius didn't get to reply to what Alice had just said because a snarling voice behind her had just said: "Banks, fancy meeting you here have you lost weight?" Which would have been a compliment if a) Alice wasn't married and the voice had just called her by Alice's maiden name and b) she was nearly 9 months pregnant.

"First off, Snivellus," snapped Alice not looking at him, "it's Longbottom, second: sucking up isn't good especially if it's about their weight and they're 9 months pregnant." 

"Longbottom, eh," he retorted. "So you finally managed to figure out how to do the Imperius curse?"

Alice found it hard to blink back the tears. 

Lily clenched her fist together, "Leave her alone!"

"Oh, mudblood, didn't see you," he snarled. "Still dating Potter? Of course you would be, he's the only boyfriend you'll ever have."

"Really?" she asked raising her eyebrows, "and here I thought I was married to him, oh silly me! You're always right," she said very sarcastically.

"And Black," Snape began, "what are you doing here? Babysitting? Did their husbands get some common sense and left them with the only gay idiot they knew?"

BAM!!!!!!!!! Sirius punched Snape in the face hard. "DON'T YOU EVER INSULT THEM AGAIN, DO YOU HEAR ME?!!! OR YOU'LL HAVE ME TO ANSWER TO." Then he swore at Snape and said all kinds of threatening stuff.

Lily noticed that Snape was trying to get something out of his pocket while keeping his eyes locked with Sirius at the same time. "Accio wand!" Shouted Lily, Snape's wand flew into Lily's hand.

"Give it to me," commanded Snape, "give me to me now."

"Give you what? This old stick looks to battered to be a wand." Taunted Lily.

"I use it properly, that's why," retorted Snape.

"For what? To plot muggles deaths perhaps?" Said Alice, "Admit it, you're a Death Eater."

"I'm not!" said Snape biting his tongue, "now give me my wand back!"

"Lily, I think you should," agreed Sirius.

Lily was so shocked to hear Sirius say that she fainted.

Alice tried to catch Lily but Alice's arms couldn't take the weight and her right arm gave a loud crack. This couldn't be good.

Snape on the other hand decided to take advantage of Lily's unconsciousness and smirked and took his wand out of Lily's hand. "Love to stay and chat and help this cow on her two feet again but I've got more important things to like smelling my feet." So he appartated off to smell his feet, or so he said.

Sirius looked red in face with anger.

Alice looked green with sickness.

Lily looked white with shock.

Meanwhile, Snape was in a state of panic and was trying to do everything in his power to get his owl to come back: he had just sent an owl to Dumbledore saying that he would be happy to take over as the Potions Master the second the old one decided to quit, after all who'd want to teach James Potter's and Frank Longbottom's offspring?

It was too late, his very frail looking owl came back empty handed, there was only one thing he could do to stop from teaching those two kids: he'd have to commit suicide.

~Back to Black~

"Lily, please wake up," pleaded Alice.

"It's no good," said Sirius, "someone is going to have to carry her."

Alice glared at Sirius.

"What?! I don't see you coming up with any ideas," he defended.

"You're a wizard for crying out loud! We're in a discreet area so why don't you just use a spell or something?" snapped Alice.

"Why don't you?" snapped back Sirius.

"I'd love to there's only one problem: Lily is using my arms as her bed!" she shouted.

"Oh, sorry," said Sirius. Lily and Alice's mood swings seemed to get worse and worse. He murmured a spell and Lily started to float in the air.

They apparated back to Lily's house. "Huh?" asked Lily as she was put down on her bed.

"It's OK Lils," assured Alice in the same tone that Lily used when Alice was sick, "everything's fine now."

After about two hours of arguing Sirius, Lily and Alice decided that the best thing to do was to see a movie. They decided to let Sirius to pick the movie for saying thanks for agreeing to look after Alice and Lily. (Even though the girls didn't like the idea from the start.)

The next worry was refreshments. The girls wanted to have as much as they wanted while Sirius was trying to explain to them that it wouldn't be great for the babies' and their own health if they ate food like popcorn and sweets. Lily and Alice won the argument by giving Sirius identical icy stares, which freaked Sirius out.

Sirius reserved the seat for the girls in the middle row because he was bored waiting in line. He recognized a man with light brown hair. "Remus? He asked.

The man turned his head revealing a pair of honey coloured eyes: it was Remus. "Hey," he retorted. "What're you doing here? You hardly ever come to the cinema if you can help it."

"I'm with couple of people," explained Sirius, "technically I'm just looking after them."

"Who?" he asked.

"Lily and Alice," Sirius answered, "They're both nearly nine months pregnant."

"I know," said Remus, "Lily and James announced it when all of the Marauders were at a part and Alice told me that she was pregnant when she was at St Mungo's I had a nasty scratch that needed to be checked out at the time."

"Guess what happened to me," said Sirius. Then he told Remus what the girls did to him and what he did to them.

"You didn't!" said Remus in surprise, "they're gonna kill you!"

Sirius grinned, "It'll be worth it to see the looks on their faces, plus the spell lasts for twenty-four hours and once the spell has been cast there's no stopping it."

"So when will they find out?" asked Remus.

"Tomorrow, as soon as they get up," answered Sirius with an evil grin on his face. "Could you help me look after them?"

"Absolutely not!" retorted Remus looking mortified, "they'll blame me once they find out."

"They won't," assured Sirius. "Please?" Sirius pouted.

"Oh, all right," gave in Remus, "but only to see the look on their faces in the morning, then you're on your own."

I just had to add our favourite werewolf in this fic!

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