Grae sat in his room aboard the Scorpio, the ship he had started three years ago. Those had been the hardest three years of his life. He had only been seventeen when he was first pulled out of the Matrix, and every time he went back in, he hated it.

Yet again they had to go in. They were supposed to get a new crew member - his name was Zen. These kinds of missions were always a little less stressful, but the Matrix was a constant reminder of the life he once lived. It was like a ghost that toyed with his mind.

A sharp knock at the door freed him from his painful memories. The door opened a little and he saw Evanesce. She was shy and did everything she was told. Bright red locks bounced down from the top of her head.Her eyes were emeralds glistening amongst a sea of freckles.

His hair was thick and black and cast odd shadows over his face and his eyes were like cryptic frozen pools set into his pale, almost gray skin. He had isolating tendencies causing him to break away from love or affection. That didn't mean he didn't love though. He was merely cautious of getting hurt again...

"We have to go now," she said shyly.

"Alright then. Let's do it," he said with a sharp tinge of pain and sadness. They found their way to the engine room. Omega stood darkly in a corner waiting for them. She had short spiked blond hair and unique red eyes that started to spark as he entered the room. Omega was always very sarcastic and sometimes it was very hard to tell if she was serious or joking.

Standing next to the controls was Jack . He had short brown hair and beady brown eyes. Jack was probably the least suspicious of all the people on board the ship. Sitting in the operator's chair was Felix, Jack's twin. Felix was the operator and was just as normal.

"Are you done hiding away in your room yet?" Omega teased.

"Yes. And are you done bothering me?" Grae asked pointedly. Omega simply glared back at him.

"Okay everyone. Let's make this quick. We're looking for someone named Zen. He is a little shorter than me and has black hair with dyed blue tips. This is important, like always. Let's get in, get out and get on with life." Grae said in a monotone.

They all climbed into their chairs and waited while Felix plugged them all in.

******

An hour later, Grae found himself asking a question he had asked many times before.

"So. Will it be the red pill or the blue pill?" Zen gave him a blank and unbelieving stare just as all the others had. This was starting to irk him, how long it took them to decide. It had taken him only a few seconds. But he had a different view on life then. And he wished he had that life back now.

Zen picked up the red pill and swallowed it with water. Grae went through the whole A.I. explanation and got the usual unbelieving answer. This though is where the trouble came. After they took Zen out of the Matrix and were beginning to call Felix for the phone line back to the ship, Felix called them first.

"Grae-something happened-the agents our outside in the hallway" Felix said in a nervous and panicky voice. He then hung up.

"Shit"

Grae turned to the others when there was a sudden a deafening blast as the door splintered. Jack fell to the floor, bullets in his head. Grae's eyes widened in disbelief and fear. He had always been afraid of the agents getting him.

"Run!" he screamed at his team mates as he kicked the two agents to the floor. It turned out, they weren't they only agents. He heard the crack of guns firing in the hall and screams that sounded like Omega and Evanesce. He picked up his dai-jo stick and whacked the agents on the ground then pulled out a gun and shot them both in the heads. He ran to the hall way and threw the dai-jo at the other two agents like a frisbee then shot them both in the heads. He watched disgustedly as they morphed from the policemen hosts.

He picked up his stick and ran to his fallen team mates. Omega was still vaguely conscious.

"Grae..." she croaked out as blood oozed from underneath her.

"Yes?" he said franticly as he cradled her head.

"Take care of the new one...and nev...never forget..."

"Never forget what?"

"I love....you..." she said. Then her body went limp.

His eyes squeezed shut and tears streamed down his face. His once colorless face was flushed red and wet. He thought back to all those times on the ship when he had suspected her love....

Once when he had first pulled her out and they were both still young. They were in the Matrix getting Evanesce. They were walking down a hallway to the room where they held all the equipment to get a new team mate out of the Matrix. He had tripped and fallen--almost. Omega caught him and a small smile slid across her face. "A guess a captain needs a hand every now and then,right?" she had said...

He suddenly felt feverish but he could still hear the phone ringing in the other room. He sat there, his love in his arms and cried out for a long time. He could here the phone ringing and ringing, trying to pull him back to reality. Disoriented, he stumbled back in the room and picked up the phone.

The next second, he was sitting in his chair on board the Scorpio. He waited impatiently fro Felix to pull out his Head-spike. Once he did, Grae fled to his room.

******

Taste the saline rolling down your cheek bone.

Tell me that your alone.

He recalled lyrics from a song by one of his favorite bands. That was three years ago. Tears stained his face and his clothes around the neckline. He sat sobbing for days. The Ghost of Sorrow swarmed around him, clouding his thoughts and emotions. Fears had been reborn that day. Fears he had had since the beginning. His crew was slaughtered. All but Felix and Zen. He couldn't trust Zen, and yet and he needed Felix as his faithful operator. He needed to return to Zion first to cremate Omega, Jack and Evanesce.

But what Grae wanted was to return to his old life in gloomy old Astoria, Oregon. At the time he left, he hated his life, but now he wanted it more than ever. Thinking he could get it back? That was just wishful thinking....