NOTE: I do not own any of these characters… you can thank FOX. If you have any questions or comment you can e-mail me at liverbrain22@hotmail.com
(Thanks for the Reviews!)
Chapter Fifteen
"You're trying to find a reason for the way you feel
tonight
your mind is lined with layers of lead
Have you heard one thing that I've said?"
Little Black Backpack – Stoke 9
Seth walked over to the side of the poolhouse and knocked on the glass door. No one answered, so he walked in.
"Hey, are you sleeping Ryan?" Seth questioned. Ryan was in bed with his back turned to him.
"Not anymore…." Ryan mumbled and turned around. "What's up?"
"Whoa, what the hell happened to you?" Seth asked.
Ryan raised his left hand to his lips. It was swollen pretty badly from the punch he had received only an hour ago. "Oh, this….." He said, lowering his hand. "Luke's friends didn't really appreciate our company tonight at Holly's party."
"You went to Holly's party?" Seth asked. He was surprised that Ryan would actually go. Luke and Ryan weren't exactly the most popular guys. But neither was Seth.
"Yeah…." Ryan said, sitting up in his bed. He got a wave of pain throughout his right arm, but ignored it.
"Do Mom and Dad know about what happened?"
Ryan shook his head. "No, not yet. I managed to escape them. Hopefully by the morning, it will go down." Ryan replied. Seth just stood their nodding at him. "So, uh, what's up? How was the comic book thingy tonight with Summer?"
Seth went over and sat down on the end of Ryan's bed. "Ryan, it was awesome! I mean, well, we didn't really go there for long. I bought a couple of comics, so it' all good. But, after that, Summer and I, we went shopping."
Ryan stopped him. "Shopping? Seth Cohen, shopping?"
Seth raised his hands up in the air. "It's my favorite sport." Seth laughed. "Especially the part where I made out with a certain season in the change room."
Ryan grinned at him. "You made out with Summer in a change room?"
Seth nodded his head. "It was like a dream come true. Like, I know she's my girlfriend now and we make out a lot, and I mean a lot, but like making out in a change room is so much hotter than making out in a bedroom." Seth exaggerated. "It all started out with just one zipper, you see, she wanted me to zip up her zipper. But clearly she wanted more than a little zippering up." Ryan started to doze off to sleep but Seth continued. "I made it out alive with only a bruise on my head. I mean, well, considering
Thanksgiving and all, where I not only had a bruise on my ass, but on my head as well….Love hurts." Seth admitting and stood up and started to walk out of the poolhouse. "Well, I'm going to go now. Clearly you've lost interest…."
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Ryan woke up with a massive headache. He slowly made his way over to the bathroom and took a quick shower before heading inside the Cohen's kitchen. He walked into the kitchen and sat beside Seth at the kitchen counter on a stool.
Seth offered him some cereal. "Thanks." Ryan said, grabbing a handful of Mini Oats. "Sorry I went out on you like a light last night."
Seth shrugged. "You were tired." He looked at Ryan's face and examined it. "It's still there, you know." Seth said, pointing to his own lip.
"I know….Do you think they will notice?" Ryan asked.
Sandy came walking into the kitchen with his briefcase. "Notice what?" Sandy asked, pouring his coffee. Ryan looked down at the counter and started to read the morning paper. Seth stared at his dad. "What?" Sandy asked again.
"Nothing," Seth looked at his watch. "Aren't you going to be late for work?"
Sandy eyed the two boys' suspiciously. "Okay, I don't know what you two are up to… But yes, I am a little late for work." Sandy said, and then continued. "I'll see you boys later." Sandy then left the kitchen.
Ryan got up from the counter. "Thanks."
Seth patted him on the back. "No problem. We should start getting ready. Summer and Marissa should be here really soon."
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"RYAN!" Marissa yelled, running up behind him. "Can we talk?" Marissa asked. Ryan closed his locker shut and started walking outside to meet up with Luke for lunch.
"What's there to talk about?" Ryan asked.
Marissa noticed Ryan's lip but didn't say anything. She didn't want him to get mad at her. "I want to talk about yesterday." She said, trying to keep up with him. "I think we need to talk about….uh, well, us."
Ryan stopped and faced her. "You were jealous of me, Marissa…You've already made that clear to me. I don't think there's anything to talk about."
"Sorry, I know, I was jealous. I just never get to see you happy, Ryan." Marissa explained. "Why don't we go do something? My dad's at the Lighthouse all day today. We could go back to my apartment and talk."
Ryan scanned the tables looking for Luke. There was no sign of him. "School's not out yet, Marissa."
"Just go to the nurses' office and say you're sick. Come on." Marissa said, hooking her arm around his arm. "Please?" She asked.
Ryan gave in and headed to the nurses' office complaining of a stomach ache. She wouldn't let him leave without calling a guardian. Good thing Kirsten wasn't in the office. He just left her a massage and then left to Marissa's house for the rest of the afternoon.
"So…" Marissa said, sitting next to Ryan in her living room. "How are things?"
Ryan shrugged. "What is it that you really needed to talk about, Marissa?" He asked.
"Ryan," Marissa began and held his hand in hers. "I want for us to move on and forget about Oliver."
Ryan stopped her. "Marissa, I can't forget about what happened with Oliver." He looked down at his arm. "It's kind of hard not to."
"I know and I'm sorry. I'm also sorry for jumping to conclusions about you hitting on Chelsea. I'm just afraid I'm going to lose you again and I don't want that." Marissa explained. "You helped me when I overdosed and you stood by my side the whole time. I want to be here for you now. I love you." She said, with tears in her eyes. Ryan shook his head. Marissa stopped him before he could say anything. "It doesn't matter right now, to me, if you love me or not. I just want you to know that I love you."
Ryan nodded his head and whispered, "Okay."
Marissa leaned in on him and kissed him gently. Ryan kissed her back and fell on top of her, kissing her more. He knew he didn't want to lose her. There were no words he could say to her. He knew he loved her back, but he was afraid of the commitment that would follow. He didn't want any mistakes, so he was going to take it slowly. He kissed her more and felt a sharp pain in his arm. He pulled away from her and stood up.
"What's the matter?" Marissa asked.
"It's just my arm. I'm starting to feel it and it hurts." Ryan replied, buttoning up his shirt that Marissa had just unbuttoned.
"Oh, are you okay? Do you need any aspirin?" Marissa asked. Before Ryan could reply, Marissa's phone rang. "Hello?" Marissa asked.
"Coop, what you are doing home?!" Summer yelled into her cell phone.
"I'm with Ryan, why?"
"You told me to meet you in the quad after school to drive you home! And Seth is also looking for Ryan."
"Well, he's here. I'll drive him home."
"Okay, talk to you later then?"
"Yeah, I'll call you later."
"Okay."
"Okay, bye." Marissa said, she then put the phone back on its cradle. "That was Summer, I forgot I asked her to drive me home. Seth was looking for you too."
"I should get going then." Ryan said, grabbing his school bag.
"I'll drive you."
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Summer and Seth sat on Seth's bed each reading a comic book. Seth was still amused over the fact that Summer liked reading comic books. He still had a hitch that Summer only read them because he liked to read them. But he didn't care, either way they were having fun together.
Summer put down her comic book. "Come on, let's go do something else."
Seth looked up from his comic book. "Like?"
"Like…." Summer leaned in and started kissing him. Seth was getting better at kissing. When she first kissed him at Caleb Nichols birthday party, it was quite the goober fest. He was definitely a fast learner when it came to kissing her.
Seth kissed her back and started moving his hands up and down her body. Summer did the same and took off Seth's shirt. She ran her hands up and down his back, kissing the insides of his mouth. They didn't stop when they heard the knock on the door or the door opening.
"Uh, I'll come back later." Ryan said, turning his back on the two of them making out.
Summer and Seth separated from each other. "Wait, what did you want?" Seth yelled out to him.
"I just needed some advice…I'll come back later." Ryan shouted out to Seth, closing the door behind him.
Seth threw his shirt back on and kissed Summer again. "I'll be right back, I promise." He said, leaving his room. It wasn't everyday that Ryan asked for advice. Heck, he barely even asked Seth anything. Whatever was on Ryan's mind was definitely more important than making out with Summer. Seth was straightening his shirt when he walked into the den. "What's up?" Seth asked, sitting down next to his friend.
"It's okay, it can wait. You can, uh, go back to making out with Summer."
Seth held up his hand, "That can wait, Ryan." He said. "So, what's up? I'm finding it hard to believe you want my advice. So whatever it is, I will try and help."
"It's Marissa…" Ryan began to explain. "I think we got back together."
"Hey, that's good." Seth said, throwing him a friendly slap on the arm. Ryan glared at him "Or not?" Seth added.
"I don't know if I'm ready. Like, I like her a lot and she told me she loved me. I just couldn't say it back because, well, …. Because I don't know if I can take another commitment. I do love her, but…."
"But what?" Seth asked.
"It's like, every time I get to know someone and love them….they turn their back on me. I don't like commitment. That's why I never had a girlfriend. There's too much crap that comes along with it. It's like that with family too." Ryan stopped and stared at his feet. "If it were you and Summer, what would you do?"
Seth hesitated, for once in his lifetime he didn't have anything to say. He didn't know what to say. He never considered such a situation with him and Summer. "Well, uh, I think I would be feeling the same way. I mean, I'm not in your situation. So I really don't know how I would be reacting. But, I do know that you love Marissa. I can see it and—"
Ryan stopped him. "Seth, maybe we weren't meant for each other."
"You and Marissa? You're seventeen, Ryan….Heck I don't know if Summer and I are meant for each other. But all I know is that I like her…a lot."
Ryan hesitated for a second and then cleared this throat. "Oliver, he said, we weren't for each other. Maybe he was right, Seth. Maybe Marissa and I aren't meant for each other."
"Come on, Ryan. You're not serious, are you? Why would you even think that, after everything that has happened? You were right about Oliver. Whatever he said to you is a bunch of bullshit." Seth stopped, remembering Ryan still hasn't spoken on the tape recorder. "Is this about the tape recorder, Ryan?" Seth asked.
Ryan didn't answer. "It doesn't matter, Seth."
"Well, clearly it does if you are thinking this way." Seth raised his voice at Ryan.
Just then Sandy came walking into the den. "Hey, is everything alright boys?" Both Ryan and Seth nodded their heads. "Seth, I need to talk to Ryan…alone." Seth got up from the couch, left the den and went to his room where Summer was awaiting him.
Ryan was nervous. He didn't know why Sandy would want to talk to him alone. "Did I do anything wrong, Sandy?" Ryan questioned.
Sandy sat down in the other couch across from Ryan. "Well, there's something I need to tell you. But first, Kirsten told me you went home after lunch. Were you not feeling well? What happened to your lip" Sandy asked.
"I was just feeling crappy. You know, I, uh, had a headache." Sandy nodded in approval.
"And what about your lip, Ryan?" Sandy questioned.
Ryan raised his hand to his lip. "It's nothing, just a fall." Ryan was getting uncomfortable with Sandy's uneasiness. He was quiet, too quiet and he kept on nodding his head. "What's the other thing you have to tell me?" Ryan asked. His right arm was beginning to tingle.
"Kirsten and I, we've been holding back on telling you this…" Sandy stopped, trying to find the right words. Ryan sat there patiently waiting for Sandy to talk. "When you hurt your arm, the hospital contacted your mother."
Ryan stopped him. "Why would they contact her?"
"Well, she has the right to know if you are seriously injured. And you were at the time. But now you have been showing us great progress." Sandy stopped and stared at Ryan, he didn't know how to tell him.
"What? Is there something else?" Ryan asked.
"She wants to see you, Ryan. You don't have to if you don't want to." Sandy said, and then continued. "She has been calling us for about a week…." Ryan clenched his right fist and Sandy noticed. "It's your decision, Ryan. Whatever you choose, Kirsten and I will understand."
Ryan couldn't deal with this right now. There were too many decisions to be made in his life right now. He was already stressing over Marissa right now. Now all he needed was his mom to come back and screw him over again. He didn't want to see her. She was just another headache in his life. She abandoned him twice. But he also knew that no matter how hard he tried to forget about her, she would always be apart his family. It was hard to run away from your own family.
Sandy cut through Ryan's thoughts. "You don't have to decide right now. Take your time, Ryan."
Ryan stood up from the couch. "I've got some homework to do." He said, walking away from Sandy and leaving the Cohen's house and into the poolhouse.
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"Oliver…What are you doing?" Ryan asked, noticing the gun in Oliver's hand.
"Fuck you, Ryan. Fuck you." Oliver repeated over and over, shaking his head, trying to get the daemons to escape from it.
"Put the gun down, man." Ryan said, trying to keep his voice calm and steady. "This is not the way things are supposed to be. Put the gun down and we'll talk things over.
"Fuck you, Ryan. You don't know Marissa, like I do. You and Marissa aren't meant for each other. It's fate." Oliver repeated. "It's fate. Once I'm gone she'll do the same. She loves me. She doesn't love you. She told me that….You're nothing but leftover's. Face it Ryan…face reality…." Oliver pointed the gun at Ryan. His hands were shaking. "Do you think she would care if you were to die right now? I mean, come on, Ryan…nobody cares about you…do you really think the Cohen's do? You're just some fucked up charity case….and Marissa told me about your family….Now that's another story, isn't it Ryan? Your nothing but leftover's" Oliver repeated. "Leftover shit…that people pity…."
"Fuck you, Oliver…." Ryan said, backing away towards the door.
Oliver started to shake violently and shot at Ryan. He missed him and shot him again, hoping he was dead. Ryan fell to the floor and Oliver couldn't see him anymore. Everything went blurry. He put the gun up to his head and said, "Marissa will be with me….She loves me…its fate…We're fate…." And then he shot himself.
"Dude, Ryan." Seth shouted out to Ryan, shaking him. "We're going to be late for school if you don't get your ass out of bed."
Ryan tore at his sheets and woke up. Seth was sitting on the end of his bed staring at him. "Uh, just give me a few minutes, Seth. I'll be ready soon."
Seth nodded his head and gave Ryan a serious look. "I couldn't help but over hear, Ryan." Seth started to say, but Ryan stopped him.
"Hear what?" Ryan asked, sitting up in his bed. He cradled his right arm. He was starting to feel it more as they days went on.
"You were saying something about fate…What fate, Ryan?" Seth asked.
Ryan stood up and started walking towards the bathroom. "Nothing, it was just a dream." Ryan said, closing the bathroom door behind him. Seth sighed and left the pool house.
Ryan looked at himself in the mirror and reflected on the nightmare. "Fate…" He repeated to himself over and over. He then splashed water on his face and heard Sandy voice.
"Ryan, you're going to be late."
Ryan opened the door to Sandy's face. Nothing but leftover's, Ryan thought to himself. "I think I want to see my mom." Ryan told Sandy.
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Okay, hope you guys liked the Chapter. It took awhile to write it…stay tuned for the next chapter. Should be up soon!
