NOTE: I do not own any of these characters… you can thank FOX. If you have any questions or comment you can e-mail me at liverbrain22@hotmail.com

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Chapter Twenty Five

"But if everything that happens is supposed to be
And it is predetermined, can't change your destiny.
I guess I'll just keep moving and someday, maybe, I'll get to where I'm going….
Yeah, I know I should be brave
But I'm just too afraid of all this change.
And it's hard to focus through all this doubt.
I keep making this "To Do" list but nothing gets crossed out."

Nothing gets Crossed Out – Bright Eyes

Friday had finally rolled around the corner and Ryan couldn't wait for school to end. He knew he wouldn't be going anywhere all weekend because he was still grounded from when he took off to Chino and didn't tell anyone. Sandy and Kirsten never found out that Ryan had gotten drunk with Luke on Wednesday night.

Ryan sat in his French class half-listening to his teacher. He was never really into French at his old high school, but he had promised Sandy and Kirsten that he would take it, only because Seth was taking it. Seth was in his class and he sat next to him. All morning Seth was trying to ignore Summer. Seth succeeded of missing school yesterday with the 'flu', but today, Sandy and Kirsten wasn't going to let him stay home again.

"Hey." Seth whispered. "Do you think maybe we can go somewhere for lunch besides the cafeteria?" He asked.

"We don't have a car." Ryan replied.

Seth sighed. "Okay, well then do you want to come with me to the library at lunch?"

"Seth, I don't think it's a good idea to ignore Summer. It could get ugly, you know." Ryan replied. "Just talk to her."

"Right." Seth nodded his head. "Talk to her. That's easy."

The school bell rang, signaling lunch hour.

"So library?" Seth asked again and then stood up and grabbed his books.

Ryan frowned at him. "Talk to her, Seth."

"If for some odd reason I don't meet up with you after school in the quad…You know why." Seth replied and then walked away from Ryan and disappeared into the crowd in the hallway.

Ryan went to his locker and dropped off his books. He grabbed his lunch and made his way over to the cafeteria. He spotted Summer and Luke sitting down at a table in the caf and went over and sat down with them.

"Hey. Where were you in class today?" Ryan asked Luke.

"I was late this morning." Luke replied and then asked, "What happened yesterday? Did you get caught?"

"Get caught for what?" Summer asked.

Ryan ignored her. "No, I didn't. They thought I had the flu."

"Sweet deal." Luke commented and then added. "So, guess who I hooked up with last night?" He asked and Ryan shrugged. "Chelsea."

Ryan choked on his food and Summer asked, "Who's Chelsea?"

Both Ryan and Luke ignored her.

"She's going to find out you're still in high school and then you'll look like an ass." Ryan said. "You're setting yourself up for a disaster."

"Oh, but I get so much out of it. And the sex…Shit." Luke rolled his eyes.

"Okay, Ew!" Summer exclaimed, picking up her bag and standing up. "I don't know what you boys are talking about and I don't want to know." She turned to Ryan. "Have you seen Seth?"

"Uh, I saw him earlier and I think he said he was going to the library." Ryan replied. He thought Seth would have talked to her. He told him that he would.

"The library?" Summer repeated. "Typical!" She said and then walked off.

"What's that all about?" Luke asked.

"Seth had dinner with her Dad and her step-mother two nights ago and he pretty much made a fool out of himself." Ryan explained. "He's been keeping a low profile."

"Ah, I see." Luke said. Marissa then came walking up to the table and sat down with them.

"Hey guys." Marissa said and then took out her lunch. "So, Ryan I was thinking maybe this weekend we could get together. I'm staying at my Mom's house all weekend."

Ryan shrugged. This 'friends' thing was a little awkward for him. He knew she still loved him and it made him nervous. "I'm grounded." Ryan replied and then bit into his sandwich.

"Oh, well I'm sure we'll see each other at some point or another." She smiled at him and Ryan smiled back at her. "Well, I should go. See you boys later." She said and then left.

"That was weird." Luke commented. "You two are just friends now, right?"

Ryan nodded his head. "Yeah, it's weird. We were never friends in the first place so it's kind of awkward…If you know what I mean."

"Totally."

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Seth sat down at the vacant table in the back of library. He had told Ryan that he would talk to Summer, but once he got to the cafeteria he had chickened out. He wasn't sure what to say to her and he didn't want Summer to get mad at him over his behavior from the other night.

Seth pulled out his Biology textbook and started working on his lab report. He knew he would be seeing Summer soon because they had Biology together. As he was jotting down his conclusion in his lab report he saw Summer coming towards him. Seth looked back down at his Biology textbook and pretended to study it.

"Cohen." Summer said and then sat down across the table from him. "Are you ignoring me?" She asked.

Seth looked up from his textbook. "Oh, uh, hey Summer. No, I'm not ignoring you. I'm just finishing up on some Biology homework."

"Right. So, where were you yesterday?" She asked.

"I was sick. Did I miss anything in Bio?" He asked casually.

Summer shook her head. "No, it was nothing but note taking." Summer reached over the table and shut Seth's textbook. "Look, I know you're trying to hide from me. I know you too well."

"Summer, I – "

Summer interrupted him. "Cohen, you're a…a geek and a total spaz." She admitted to him. Seth frowned at her. "But, I knew that before I started dating you. Sure, the other night you made a complete ass of yourself in front of my Father and totally embarrassed me, but I don't care."

"You don't?" Seth asked. He was a little bit surprised.

"Nope." She said and then bit down on her lip. "My Father's a complete jackass, anyway. I don't care what he says about you, I know I like you, Seth."

"Uh, I like you too, Summer." Seth replied, unsure of how this conversation was going. Five minutes ago he was expecting a rage black out, but now he didn't know what to expect. "So, you're not mad at me?" Seth asked her to make sure.

"I just told you I wasn't. Cohen, do you not listen?" Summer replied. "Whatever. Let's go to the cafeteria. I'm starved!"

Seth gathered up his books and followed Summer down to the cafeteria.

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It was after supper and Ryan was in the den, watching T.V and listening to Seth ramble on and on about Summer. He wasn't really listening to him. He just kept on making sure he nodded his head occasionally and asked a few questions. Sandy and Kirsten had decided to go to a movie tonight, so the boys had the place all to themselves. Ryan wasn't supposed to be watching T.V. Sandy had told him to stay put in the poolhouse and do his homework. As if that would happen, Ryan thought to himself, as he was watching another re-run of 'That 70's Show'.

"Dude, are you even listening to me?" Seth questioned.

"Not really, Seth. I get it…You and Summer are cool now and you're happy. I'm happy that you're happy."

"Okay…" Seth replied. Maybe he was talking a bit too much about himself, and not enough about others, so he asked Ryan, "So how's the arm?"

"Great." Ryan said, in his monosyllable mood.

"So, good enough to play some Playstation?" Seth asked.

"Yeah." Ryan replied and then turned on the Playstation. "Tony Hawk?" He asked.

"Nah, you're getting too good at that one. How about the Dave Mirra game." Seth replied. Ryan popped in the Dave Mirra BMX game and starting playing. "Damnit, you've been practicing at this one too." Seth commented and then the doorbell rang. "I'll get it." He paused the game and got up.

Ryan went into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of juice and then went back into the den. Seth came back into the den with Marissa.

"Hey, Ryan." Marissa said. "I thought maybe we could hang out…My Mom decided to go out tonight and Caitlin's sleeping over at a friends house." Marissa explained and then sat down next to him on the couch. "What are you guys playing?"

"Dave Mirra." Seth answered, returning to the game.

"Here, you want to play?" Ryan asked.

"No, I'll watch." Marissa replied.

The doorbell than rang again and Seth paused the game. "Crap, what is it with the visitors today?" He got up and answered the door.

"So, how are you?" Marissa asked Ryan.

"Fine, you? How are things with your Mom?" Ryan asked.

"Good."

Seth then game back into the den with Summer.

"Hey Coop, hey Ryan." Summer greeted them and then sat down next to Seth on the couch.

"Hey Sum, what are you doing here?" Marissa asked.

"Bored out of my mind." Summer replied and then turned to Seth. "Do you really have to play Playstation?" She asked. "Come on, let's go up to your room." She stood up and dragged him off the couch.

"Later." Seth shouted out to Ryan.

"So…" Ryan said.

"This is weird, isn't it?" Marissa asked.

"Yeah." Ryan admitted. He didn't know how to act around her. He felt uncomfortable. "Did you want to uh, go back to the poolhouse? I don't want Sandy or Kirsten walking in on me with a visitor. I'm not even supposed to be in the den anyway."

"Sure." Marissa followed him into the poolhouse. Somehow it looked different to her than before. Maybe it was because before the poolhouse was their hideout place to make out. Not anymore though, she thought to herself.

"Drink?" Ryan asked, opening his mini fridge.

"Water's good." Marissa replied. Ryan handed her a bottle of water and then went over to his bed and sat down. Marissa walked around the poolhouse looking around. "I didn't know you were into this kind of music." Marissa said, picking up a Bright Eyes CD off his desk.

"I'm not really into them. Seth keeps on leaving his CD's in here."

"Oh." Marissa replied, picking up a tape recorder. "What this?" She flashed it in front of him.

"Nothing." Ryan got up from the bed and tried to take it from her. "Marissa, give it to me." He said.

Marissa hid the tape recorder behind her back and laughed at him. "Why do you have Luke's dad's tape recorder?" She asked.

"How do you know it's his?" Ryan questioned.

"Because his name is on the back of it." Marissa replied. "What's on it?" She asked again.

"Nothing."

"Well then if it's nothing…" Ryan tried to take it from her again. "If it's nothing, like you say it is, then I'll just listen to it."

"Marissa, you can't." Ryan told her. "I don't want you to."

"Why?" She asked.

"Because…"

"Because?" Marissa moved away from him and started to rewind the tape.

"Look, Marissa…" Ryan began and Marissa pressed play. "Don't…"

Oliver's voice filled the poolhouse. "Fuck you, Ryan. Fuck you…."

Ryan's voice came on now, "Put the gun down, man. This is not the way things are supposed to be. Put the gun down and we'll talk things over."

"Fuck you, Ryan. You don't know Marissa, like I do. You and Marissa aren't meant for each other. It's fate." Oliver repeated. "It's fate. Once I'm gone she'll do the same. She loves me. She doesn't love you. She told me that…. You're nothing but leftover's. Face it Ryan…face reality…. Do you think she would care if you were to die right now? I mean, come on, Ryan…nobody cares about you…do you really think the Cohen's do? You're just some fucked up charity case…. And Marissa told me about your family…. Now that's another story, isn't it Ryan? Your nothing but leftover's" Oliver repeated. "Leftover shit…that people pity…."

"Fuck you, Oliver…." Ryan said and then they heard two gunshots' go off in the background.

"Marissa will be with me…. She loves me…its fate…We're fate…." And then another gunshot went of and the tape stopped.

Marissa stood in the middle of the poolhouse frozen. She dropped the tape recorder on the ground and then collapsed to the ground herself. "Oh my God." She repeated over and over. Ryan went over to her and knelt down. Marissa started to cry.

"It's okay, Marissa." Ryan held her close.

She looked up and him with tears flowing down her cheeks. "Ryan – I didn't – I – Oh my God." She burrowed her face into his shoulder.

"It's okay." Ryan told her again.

"No, it's not." Marissa looked up at him. "I didn't know about any of that. I'm sorry, Ryan. You don't know how sorry I am. None of that is true, Ryan!" Marissa explained. "He was sick. You were right about him all along and I'm sorry I put you through that. You didn't deserve that."

Ryan let go of her and went back over to his bed. "He's right, Marissa." Ryan whispered. "I'm leftover's…The Cohen's, they just feel sorry for me."

Marissa walked over to him on the bed and sat down next to him. "How could you say that, Ryan? They love you just as much as they love Seth. And you're not leftover's. Far from it."

Ryan shrugged.

"Ryan, I love you and you're not leftover's!"

"God!" Ryan yelled at her and stood up. "I love you?" He mimicked. "Why is it you always try to cheer me up by saying 'I love you'? Huh?" He questioned.

"Because it's the truth, Ryan. I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it." Marissa replied.

"Sorry…" Ryan mumbled and then sat back down next to her. "I don't know anymore…About us."

"It doesn't matter to me, Ryan. I just want you to know that you're not some charity case that the Cohen's feel sorry for. I hope you understand that."

Ryan shook his head. "Can we just not talk about this whole Oliver thing again? I'm getting real tired of it and it's screwing up my head every time I think about it."

"Okay." Marissa said, rubbing him on the back. "Did you want me to leave?" She asked.

Ryan shook his head. "No, stay." He didn't want her to leave. She was comforting to him right now. "We can just lay here and talk…"

"Ryan Atwood? Talk?" Marissa laughed. Ryan glared at her. "Sorry."

The two of them lay down on his bed and stared up at the ceiling. Ryan ended up talking about Luke and his new 'project' Chelsea. They talked for over an hour and fell asleep next to each other.

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