Chapter 23
Dinner was uneventful, the conversation dominated by Laura and Emily with the occasional oh-so-cute remark from Sydney. As Jack said goodbye to the Sloanes and shut the door behind him, he felt both relieved that it had gone all right, and anxious about the evening to come. He sighed and went into the kitchen. Laura had just finished drying the dishes, and without a word he started putting them away.
"Did you have any homework this weekend, Sydney?" Laura asked as she sat down at the table.
"Yeah, I did it earlier," Sydney replied.
"Can I see it?" Sydney got her homework out of her backpack and passed it to Laura, who made sure that all of the answers were right. "This looks good," she said as she put it back in the backpack. "Have you been practicing the piano this weekend?"
Jack turned in time to catch Sydney's guilty expression and felt just a bit guilty himself. "Um, I guess I forgot," Sydney said.
Laura glanced at the wall clock. "That's all right," she said. "You've still got time to practice tonight before your bath."
Sydney nodded and headed to the living room, where moments later they heard her working her way through "Row, Row, Row Your Boat".
Jack came around to stand in front of Laura. "Sorry, I forgot to remind her to practice," he said.
"That's all right, you had other things on your mind," Laura said softly. "Anyway, a couple of days off won't kill her." They stared at each other in awkward silence for a moment. Laura broke it by saying, "Are you going back to work tomorrow?"
"Tuesday," Jack replied. He debated whether to talk to her about Twilight now, but then decided that tomorrow would be better.
Laura started to get up. "Well, I guess I'll head upstairs. Can you send Sydney up when she'd done?"
Jack nodded and watched as she swung herself out of the kitchen. He debated for a moment whether to have a drink, but then decided that he needed some help to get through the evening. He poured himself a double scotch and sat down to drink it. Although he hadn't slept well the last couple of nights, he had refused to allow himself to drink; after the night two years ago when he had nearly burned the house down making toast, he and Laura had agreed that they would not allow themselves to get drunk when Sydney was home. But he wasn't going to get drunk, he told himself; he would just have this to take the edge off. He sipped the drink and relished the burning sensation as it went down. And even if he did get drunk, Laura would be able to put out any fires.
Now that he thought about it, she had been remarkably efficient in putting out that toaster fire two years ago, and she had sobered up pretty quickly afterwards. Well, he had too once he'd realized that he could have killed them all, but she'd been faster. Had she really been drunk that night? Had she ever really been drunk around him? "I'll add that to the list," he muttered.
After a few minutes, the sound of the piano stopped, and Sydney came into the kitchen. "Where's Mommy?" she asked.
"She went upstairs," Jack answered, trying to smile at her. "She's waiting to give you your bath."
"Oh. Okay." Sydney stood there for a moment, looking at him, a confused expression on her face.
"Is something wrong, sweetheart?" Jack asked.
"No, Daddy. I'll go take my bath now." She left, and he breathed a sigh of relief.
"Got to be a better actor, Jack. She's going to suspect something if she doesn't already," he said to himself. Damn it, he thought. He had enough trouble going undercover and fighting the KGB in his job; now it had become his [I]life[/I]. He upended the glass and drank the rest of the scotch in one gulp, then sat staring at the empty glass for a moment. He got up and poured himself another.
***
Laura gave Sydney a bath, tucked her into bed, and read a chapter of [I]Charlotte's Web[/I], then leaned over and kissed her on her forehead. "Goodnight, sweetheart," she said. She had always treasured every moment with Sydney, knowing that she would one day have to leave, but now that she had almost lost it all she was more determined than ever to give Sydney-and herself-good memories enough to last a lifetime.
"Mommy?" Sydney said sleepily as Laura stood and put the book back on Sydney's bookshelf. "Is Daddy mad at you?"
Irina frowned. What had happened? Had Jack said something to her? "What makes you think he's mad at me?"
"'Cause he hasn't hugged you or kissed you all day. And he kind of looks mad when he looks at you."
Sh*t, Irina thought. Sydney was too damn perceptive. She smiled down at Sydney. "Daddy's not mad at me, sweetheart. He's just tired because he has to do lots of things that I usually do because I'm hurt." Hopefully that excuse would work as long as she was on crutches, and by then maybe Sydney would forget how often her parents used to touch. She gave Sydney another kiss. "Sleep well, okay?"
"Okay. Good night, Mommy. I love you."
"I love you too, Sydney."
Dinner was uneventful, the conversation dominated by Laura and Emily with the occasional oh-so-cute remark from Sydney. As Jack said goodbye to the Sloanes and shut the door behind him, he felt both relieved that it had gone all right, and anxious about the evening to come. He sighed and went into the kitchen. Laura had just finished drying the dishes, and without a word he started putting them away.
"Did you have any homework this weekend, Sydney?" Laura asked as she sat down at the table.
"Yeah, I did it earlier," Sydney replied.
"Can I see it?" Sydney got her homework out of her backpack and passed it to Laura, who made sure that all of the answers were right. "This looks good," she said as she put it back in the backpack. "Have you been practicing the piano this weekend?"
Jack turned in time to catch Sydney's guilty expression and felt just a bit guilty himself. "Um, I guess I forgot," Sydney said.
Laura glanced at the wall clock. "That's all right," she said. "You've still got time to practice tonight before your bath."
Sydney nodded and headed to the living room, where moments later they heard her working her way through "Row, Row, Row Your Boat".
Jack came around to stand in front of Laura. "Sorry, I forgot to remind her to practice," he said.
"That's all right, you had other things on your mind," Laura said softly. "Anyway, a couple of days off won't kill her." They stared at each other in awkward silence for a moment. Laura broke it by saying, "Are you going back to work tomorrow?"
"Tuesday," Jack replied. He debated whether to talk to her about Twilight now, but then decided that tomorrow would be better.
Laura started to get up. "Well, I guess I'll head upstairs. Can you send Sydney up when she'd done?"
Jack nodded and watched as she swung herself out of the kitchen. He debated for a moment whether to have a drink, but then decided that he needed some help to get through the evening. He poured himself a double scotch and sat down to drink it. Although he hadn't slept well the last couple of nights, he had refused to allow himself to drink; after the night two years ago when he had nearly burned the house down making toast, he and Laura had agreed that they would not allow themselves to get drunk when Sydney was home. But he wasn't going to get drunk, he told himself; he would just have this to take the edge off. He sipped the drink and relished the burning sensation as it went down. And even if he did get drunk, Laura would be able to put out any fires.
Now that he thought about it, she had been remarkably efficient in putting out that toaster fire two years ago, and she had sobered up pretty quickly afterwards. Well, he had too once he'd realized that he could have killed them all, but she'd been faster. Had she really been drunk that night? Had she ever really been drunk around him? "I'll add that to the list," he muttered.
After a few minutes, the sound of the piano stopped, and Sydney came into the kitchen. "Where's Mommy?" she asked.
"She went upstairs," Jack answered, trying to smile at her. "She's waiting to give you your bath."
"Oh. Okay." Sydney stood there for a moment, looking at him, a confused expression on her face.
"Is something wrong, sweetheart?" Jack asked.
"No, Daddy. I'll go take my bath now." She left, and he breathed a sigh of relief.
"Got to be a better actor, Jack. She's going to suspect something if she doesn't already," he said to himself. Damn it, he thought. He had enough trouble going undercover and fighting the KGB in his job; now it had become his [I]life[/I]. He upended the glass and drank the rest of the scotch in one gulp, then sat staring at the empty glass for a moment. He got up and poured himself another.
***
Laura gave Sydney a bath, tucked her into bed, and read a chapter of [I]Charlotte's Web[/I], then leaned over and kissed her on her forehead. "Goodnight, sweetheart," she said. She had always treasured every moment with Sydney, knowing that she would one day have to leave, but now that she had almost lost it all she was more determined than ever to give Sydney-and herself-good memories enough to last a lifetime.
"Mommy?" Sydney said sleepily as Laura stood and put the book back on Sydney's bookshelf. "Is Daddy mad at you?"
Irina frowned. What had happened? Had Jack said something to her? "What makes you think he's mad at me?"
"'Cause he hasn't hugged you or kissed you all day. And he kind of looks mad when he looks at you."
Sh*t, Irina thought. Sydney was too damn perceptive. She smiled down at Sydney. "Daddy's not mad at me, sweetheart. He's just tired because he has to do lots of things that I usually do because I'm hurt." Hopefully that excuse would work as long as she was on crutches, and by then maybe Sydney would forget how often her parents used to touch. She gave Sydney another kiss. "Sleep well, okay?"
"Okay. Good night, Mommy. I love you."
"I love you too, Sydney."
