Chapter 34

After a while, Jack lifted his head up to see the clock. He'd marked the time when he'd injected the drug, and almost an hour had passed. Laura's breathing had gotten deep and even, and he was pretty sure she had fallen asleep.

Had she really fallen in love with him? She'd remembered while she was talking to him that he knew she was KGB, so she had no reason to lie. It made sense, he realized. If she really did love him, the deception wouldn't have been that hard, since she'd only had to lie about facts. And it salvaged his ego a bit to think that she'd really been in love with him, that he hadn't missed that much after all. But if she loved him, and if she was no longer loyal to the KGB, why hadn't she told him the truth? He'd have to ask her, he decided.

Her revelations concerning her father had been horrifying; no wonder she had nightmares and flashbacks. At the same time, though, he had to admire her strength. She wasn't a frightened doormat, but she also hadn't turned into a cruel monster. Instead, she was warm and loving, with a fiery temper but also with a wicked sense of humor. She had never hesitated to make him angry, sometimes doing it on purpose and enjoying the results. She had never, ever hit Sydney; instead, on the few occasions when it was needed, she came up with creative punishments calculated to cause Sydney the perfect amount of misery to make up for her transgression.

Could she really fake all of that? Could Irina be a completely different woman than the Laura he knew? He was pretty sure that wasn't true.which meant that she was still the woman he'd fallen in love with. Except, of course, for the tiny matter of her lying to him and betraying him for ten years. Jack sighed into her hair. They needed to talk, he decided.

***

When Irina woke up, she was rather surprised to find herself curled up against a warm, solid object that could only be Jack. She pulled back and opened her eyes to see him looking back at her. "Jack?" she said softly. "Did it work?"

"Sort of," he answered. "How do you feel?"

She considered for a moment. "My head hurts, and my stomach's a little queasy. And." She frowned, tasting an odd combination of mouthwash and something sour. "Did I throw up?"

He nodded. "Fortunately, I got you the trashcan in time. What do you remember?"

"I remember you were talking to me, and I couldn't understand the words, but I was answering you. Then I had a nightmare." She forced her mind away from the still-vivid memories of her mother's death. "I guess I fell asleep after that. I don't remember getting sick."

Jack frowned. "You don't remember talking to me after that?"

She shook her head. "What did I say?"

"You answered most of the questions on the list before you had your hallucination. And then afterwards.well, you talked about your parents."

Her parents? Irina was rather alarmed at that. "What exactly did I say?"

Jack seemed reluctant to speak. He grabbed her hand. "You told me what your father did to your brother and to your mother."

"I told you that he.that he killed them?" Jack nodded. She found herself feeling the same strange relief she'd felt when she realized she no longer had to lie to Jack about the KGB. "That's what my hallucination was about. When my mother died."

"Laura, I'm so sorry."

"It's all right." She smiled a little. "I hardly even think about any of it any more. I've got you and Sydney now." Her expression grew serious. "And the KGB to worry about, and the CIA, and the fact that you hate me now."

"I don't hate you." He squeezed her hand.

She looked into his eyes, daring to hope. "I'm so sorry, Jack. I never wanted to hurt you." She yawned as a sudden wave of exhaustion swept over her.

Jack sat up and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear; her eyes threatened to tear up at the familiar gesture. "You should take a nap," he said. "Those drugs take a lot out of you."

She smiled ruefully. "I feel like I'm sleeping my life away." She didn't really want to go to sleep again, but considering that she didn't feel like she could lift her head off the pillow, it was probably a good idea.

Jack smiled as he got out of bed. "I've got a report to write for Dawson. I'll leave the doors open, so call if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay." She smiled at him for a moment, then closed her eyes. She felt him give her shoulder a gentle squeeze before his footsteps left the room.