Hooray! Monthly Madness is up and running! Valentine's Day this month! Oh, and I forgot to mention...Malik's personality in these stories is how I like seeing him...a goofy, fun loving man. So, yea...the OOCness is on purpose. Well, enjoy MM2!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own YGO (Kazuki Takahasi owns that), Valentine's Day (Cupid owns that), Yaoiness (Um...all the fangirls own that), and I don't own Malik's insanity (He owns that)

Monthly Madness 2

February 2004

Valentine's Day

The day was a normal one for the ashen haired one as he left to run a few errands, leaving his Egyptian beauty home alone. He would rarely trust his handsome, though somewhat destructive lover, alone, but this was important. Today was Valentine's Day and Ryou had a few last minute things to do before night feel and the freaks came out to play.

"I'll be back as soon as I can, hun." He kissed his lover's tanned cheek as the Egyptian smiled faintly. "Please, I beg you...no shooting at the neighbor's dog again. It is not target practice." Malik pouted. "No using my good silverware to build forts." He pouted once more. "And, absolutely no having 'Let's See What Goes Down The Toilet First' contests." This depressed Malik, but Ryou only smiled and kissed his forehead. "I'll be home in about three hours. See ya, sweetie." With that, Ryou left and Malik's devilish grin surfaced as he leapt up from his resting place and waddled around the house, finding some necessary things for the day's activities. Today was Malik's day.

"Alright, troops..." He paced in front of his army, speaking diligently. "You heard Ryou...he'll be home in three hours. That doesn't give us that much time to plan the perfect Valentine's Day for him!" He eyed his troops. "LOOK ALIVE, MEN!" He exclaimed as one solider, a mop, fell lifelessly to the ground. Malik rolled his eyes. It's so hard to find good help these days. He continued to speak. "Cleaning crew!" He pointed to a broom, a bottle of Windex, and the fallen mop. "You are in charge of making the place spotless for when Ryou comes home." He eyed the fallen mop with a sneer. "And, I expect all of you to pull your weight." He then moved on to the second defense against anything going wrong that night. "Cooking crew, your job is to assist me in making the best meal ever for my love." The two pots, forks, spoons, and spatula looked like a lively bunch as Malik smiled. "Am I understood? Do we all know our assignments?"

Silence.

"How did I know I was gonna end up doing this alone?" With that, Malik took off to perform the rarely seen 'Flight Of The Winged Dragon' cleaning maneuver that was deadly to both the performer and the audience. The blonde one cleaned top to bottom, even going as far as to sweep all the dust under the rugs. He only wanted the best for Ryou. Every so often between cleaning, he would work with the cooking crew, preparing a meal fit for a king (Or a pharaoh, if going by the Egyptians), a chicken the size of Ryou's head, basted in a special marinade from his homeland (Which was basically just a jazzed up version of ketchup). He popped the bird in the oven and finished cleaning with an hour to spare, which was just enough time for the chicken to cook. Satisfied with his work, he plopped down on the couch and yawned, rubbing his eyes childishly.

"I deserve a five minute nap before Ryou gets home." He looked around the dwelling, which was decently clean. Malik rested his head against the cushion and yawned once more, his violet orbs slowly closing. The Egyptian drifted into a peacefully sleep. This is going to be the best Valentine's Day ever...

~*~

"Malik! Malik! The house is on fire!" A voice awoke the Egyptian from his blissful sleep as his eyes opened only to see billowing clouds of gray smoke coming from the kitchen. The voice that came from the kitchen belonged to a scared Ryou, whose auburn orbs trembled in fear. Malik leapt up from his resting place and ran into the kitchen, fighting his way through the heavy smoke. He knew what it was and a panicked expression filled his violet orbs as he tore the oven open, pulling out the prized bird that was now the size of an M+M on a steroid overdose. Malik whimpered and stared at the dysfunctional bird, Ryou coming up behind him and wrapping his arm around Malik's shoulder.

"What's wrong, hun? And, what the heck is that?"

"It's--" He frowned, looking to Ryou with a tear stricken expression. "It's the dinner I made you."

Ryou's jaw dropped as the most sincere of looks swept across his face as he huggled his love. "Awwww...sweetie, you didn't have to make me anything."

"But--but, it's Valentine's Day and..."

"Shush..." He kissed the tanned one's lips gently. "The only thing that matters it we're together."

Malik frowned and pulled away from his lover's grasp as he voice perked up only slightly. "There still is one thing I can make..."

~*~

"Malik, that was the best bowl of Fruity Pebbles I ever had." Ryou licked his lips, tasting the final bits of milk that clung. The Egyptian frowned, feeling that he disgraced his love by feeding him ceral.

"But, Ryou...that chicken I made was gonna be really good..."

"This was better." Ryou smiled and kissed his lover's cheek. Malik blushed ever so slightly and at the very moment, he remembered something. He jumped up from his seat and ran to the bedroom, as the pallid one only watched on. He's an odd one....

Silence reigned for but a few moments before a loud crash and a few bangs were heard. Ryou could only image what his hunny as doing in there. Suddenly, the bedroom door swung open as Malik's bronzed hand peeked out, signaling Ryou to enter the room. He hesitated, but rose and walked over to the door, only peeking in. Before he knew it, the ashen haired one was pulled into the secluded room, the door locking shut behind him. Before Ryou's chestnut eyes lay a romantic scene. Lit candles surrounded the couples water bed and Malik lay in the middle of this scene, shirtless. The faint light from the candles glistened off his muscle tinted chest.

Malik rose and walked over to his lover, wrapping his arms tightly around him. "Let's make this a night to remember." He whispered as he pulled Ryou down with him onto the bed. Unfortunately, the Egyptian had no coordination and outstretched his arms as he fell, hitting one of the dressers that hosted a few candles. The candles wobbled for a second and fell, landing on the water bed The heat caused the mattress of water to pop, a wave of nuke warm water crashing over the two bodies. Ryou's bushy ashen locks flopped over his eyes, a stern look swept across his pale face. Malik only looked on with an embarrassed smile, his blonde tresses carressing his dampened face. He chuckled nervously, then pouted.

"I'm so sorry, Ryou...I can't do anything right." He curled into a ball of damp clothing and a tear streaked face. Ryou pouted and rung out his ashen locks as he crawled over to the love of his life, kissing his soft cheek.

"Don't say that, hunny...I know you're trying..."

Malik rose and walked out of the room. He returned minutes later with a single red rose in his hand. "Ryou, my love, this whole day was a disaster. I tried to make this the best Valentine's Day ever and I screwed up. So, this is all I have to offer you." He held out the rose to Ryou, and he took it with a loving smile on his face. Malik pouted as Ryou set the rose down and leapt up, pinning Malik against the bedroom door.

"Well, you gave me my gift." He kissed Malik's neck. "Now, it's my turn." He viciously molested Malik's neck with his lips as the Egyptian purred. Maybe I should fuck up more often.

This Month's Moral: Though Valentine's Day is supposed to be a day of love and expressing that love, talking to inanimate objects, burning food, and popping water beds can also be a part of this joyous day.