It was slow today. Middle of the week, day shift, October. Not a busy time of year. Susan took a chart at random from the rack. 35 year old man, cough of 6 week duration. Smoker. Sounded like fun. She turned to head for curtain 3, and bumped into Abby.
"Hey, Susan. How's it going?"
"Good. Nice and slow for a change."
"A bunch of us are going out after work tonight - you know - Girl's Club. Want to join us?"
"I can't," Susan said.
"We never see you any more," Abby reminded her.
"Sorry, Abby, but I have a prior engagement."
"Let me guess," Abby said with a smile. "Tall guy, dark hair, Croatian accent?"
"Yes, I'm having dinner with Luka. Yes, again."
"Sounds like things are getting pretty serious between the two of you."
"No, they're not."
"Seems like every time I see you, you have plans to do something with Luka. If that doesn't meet the definition of 'serious', I don't know what does."
"It isn't 'serious', Abby, because we aren't going out. We're just friends." Abby looked dubious. "Really, Abby. He's lonely. He doesn't get out much, he can't drive yet, he's not working ... he doesn't seem to have very many friends. We just like spending time together. It cheers him up, and I like it too."
"Regular little angel of mercy, aren't we? I thought that was a nurse's job."
"Am I detecting a little jealousy here?" Susan didn't miss the hint of something - bitterness, maybe, in Abby's tone.
"I'm not jealous, Susan. I'm just finding the relationship a little puzzling, that's all. And I don't want you to get hurt."
"You're not the only one who's puzzled," Susan admitted with a smile.
"So ... let's see ..." Abby said. "You see him what, 3? 4? times a week? I know for a fact that you aren't seeing anyone else, not since you showed Chuck the door. You've been doing this for a couple of months now ... but you're not dating?"
"It's what he wants. He doesn't want a relationship right now. He said maybe he'd be interested some time ... but not right now. And that's ok."
Abby looked up, startled. "And he didn't tell you why?"
"No. I'm sure it has something to do with what happened to him in Africa, but I'm not going to pry. He'll tell me when he's ready." Susan saw something in Abby's expression. "Did he tell you something?"
"No, not exactly." Abby sounded uncomfortable. "I found out something ... I'm not even sure if it has anything to do with this or not."
"Then I don't want to hear about it," Susan said firmly. "I'm not going to pry into his business."
Abby nodded. "Don't pry. And I won't tell you. I think the best way to keep him as a friend, or anything else, is to keep his trust, let him open up to you when he's ready." She sighed. "You're lucky, Susan. I've had Luka as a friend, and as a lover. I think we were better as friends - not that he wasn't pretty good the other way ..."
Susan laughed, then sobered again. "I don't know what happened between the two of you, but I'll see if I can talk to him. Maybe the three of us can get together sometime..."
"A menage?" Abby teased.
Susan smacked her with the chart. "Three friends, stupid!"
"No, I wouldn't want to intrude on your good times. It sounds like you have something nice going. I guess he'll be back at work soon?"
"He's hoping to be. A few more weeks maybe, certainly before the New Year."
"So, I'll see him at work then. We can figure out where we stand."
"I'm sure everything will work out," Susan assured her. She looked at her chart again. "Well, duty beckons."
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Susan handed the keys to the valet, got out of the car. She was meeting Luka at the restaurant tonight. She was tired, but she smiled. The thought of seeing Luka always made her smile. Even more so recently. He was doing so much better. Physically he was improving a lot. He got around easily now. He didn't even need the brace anymore. And, perhaps due to the physical improvement, he seemed much happier, more confident.
'We're just friends.' How many times had she said that. To herself, to other people. How many times had Luka said it to her. Made sure that she understood that friends were all they could ever be.
And she was happy being friends. If they were never anything more, that would be ok. But Susan couldn't deny it now. It wasn't really enough for her. Not anymore. She did want something more than friendship from him. There was no rush, not really. She wouldn't push him. But when he seemed more ready, maybe when he was working again, felt more secure and confident, and had begun to finally put behind him whatever traumas still imprisoned him so tightly - maybe then, if he didn't do it first, she would broach the subject. But there wasn't any rush. She was 38 years old. She'd been waiting this long for the right relationship. She could wait a little longer, even as she grew more certain, every day, that this was the right one.
Luka was waiting for her in the lobby. He saw her come in, rose from his seat and smiled. He touched her arm briefly in greeting. Susan could see that it was a still struggle for him to do it, that it was something he did primarily for the benefit of on-lookers, but she was pleased that he was making the effort, and pleased that it seemed to be easier for him every time he tried.
"Our table is ready," he told her.
"Sorry I'm so late. Traffic was awful."
