My hand touches your photo and it's almost like you're here again. It's like I can feel the soft , slight roughness of your cheek against mine. It's almost as if, you're sitting right next to me, cold staring eyes; eyes that could always make me shiver.
You told me, that I would always get my way. Being the boy-who-lived, It was sort of like an unspoken rule. But you knew better . Rarely did I get what I truly wanted. I think you knew how much I needed you , but you never really saw it, or maybe you're just good at pretending you didn't see it.
I sit awake at night, and just stare at the moon. I turn around, as though I'm expecting you to be there. I look back outside, and shiver. From the cold I expect.
You never really did see me, did you? I guess I can't expect you to know what I'm thinking, or feeling.
You could always make me shiver. But You didn't even notice . I would sit next to you, and the mere brush of your hand against mine, made me shiver with , a feeling I'm not sure I could describe in words alone.
You told me that you loved me, about a week before you went away. We laid in bed, I was nearly asleep, and then I heard the whisper in my ear.
My stomach spun and my heart stopped. And god did I hate you. More then anything. More then I hated myself for not stopping you from going. How could you say you loved me, when you knew you were to go off and die? But I acted as though I was asleep. I didn't get more then thirty minutes for sleep the night.
You left a week later, December thirty first. Dumbledore said you were ready , and that you would return. I hated him too , if it makes a difference. For lying. For giving me hope.
You went to the death eaters, for the last time. I watched you walked away, and something crumbled inside of me. Maybe my soul? I don't know........ but once again you made me shiver. It was just like I thought it would be. Snowing, cold, a perfect day for a snowball fight. And they killed you. They . Killed. You. I couldn't bare it. I couldn't breathe when Albus and Lupin went to get your body. I couldn't even look at you. Because this small, stupid part of me thought that maybe you weren't dead.
You did this to me. You told me you loved. You left me with a promise, one that should never be broken. And I hate it. And Dumbledore. He gave me hope. False hope.
You used to say, that I was the boy who lived and that I would get everything I ever wanted. But you knew that wasn't true.
Lupin said, that time will pass, and I'll remember all the things I loved about you, and the pain will fade. But it never really happened. I still feel this pain, I live with it everyday. Every time I breath, or walk through Hogwarts, all I think about is you and how you could always make my shiver.
I guess I'll just always be waiting for you.
You told me, that I would always get my way. Being the boy-who-lived, It was sort of like an unspoken rule. But you knew better . Rarely did I get what I truly wanted. I think you knew how much I needed you , but you never really saw it, or maybe you're just good at pretending you didn't see it.
I sit awake at night, and just stare at the moon. I turn around, as though I'm expecting you to be there. I look back outside, and shiver. From the cold I expect.
You never really did see me, did you? I guess I can't expect you to know what I'm thinking, or feeling.
You could always make me shiver. But You didn't even notice . I would sit next to you, and the mere brush of your hand against mine, made me shiver with , a feeling I'm not sure I could describe in words alone.
You told me that you loved me, about a week before you went away. We laid in bed, I was nearly asleep, and then I heard the whisper in my ear.
My stomach spun and my heart stopped. And god did I hate you. More then anything. More then I hated myself for not stopping you from going. How could you say you loved me, when you knew you were to go off and die? But I acted as though I was asleep. I didn't get more then thirty minutes for sleep the night.
You left a week later, December thirty first. Dumbledore said you were ready , and that you would return. I hated him too , if it makes a difference. For lying. For giving me hope.
You went to the death eaters, for the last time. I watched you walked away, and something crumbled inside of me. Maybe my soul? I don't know........ but once again you made me shiver. It was just like I thought it would be. Snowing, cold, a perfect day for a snowball fight. And they killed you. They . Killed. You. I couldn't bare it. I couldn't breathe when Albus and Lupin went to get your body. I couldn't even look at you. Because this small, stupid part of me thought that maybe you weren't dead.
You did this to me. You told me you loved. You left me with a promise, one that should never be broken. And I hate it. And Dumbledore. He gave me hope. False hope.
You used to say, that I was the boy who lived and that I would get everything I ever wanted. But you knew that wasn't true.
Lupin said, that time will pass, and I'll remember all the things I loved about you, and the pain will fade. But it never really happened. I still feel this pain, I live with it everyday. Every time I breath, or walk through Hogwarts, all I think about is you and how you could always make my shiver.
I guess I'll just always be waiting for you.
