Chapter 11
An Aurorism in Question
"Tonks, I can't do this," Harry said one Monday evening during a training session. "It's just too much: the N.E.W.T. classes, the training, Quidditch... This sounds more like the kind of schedule Hermione would have than me. I just can't keep my grades and my Quidditch performance up anymore."
Tonks looked up at Harry and searched his eyes. "You can't, or you won't?" she questioned.
"I can't."
"You're lying."
"No, I'm not. This is just too much."
Sighing, she put her head in her hands, as if searching for answers to his testimony. "Harry, you are the one destined to vanquish Voldemort. Dark times will overcome the world if you fail."
"I know that, but it's just too much!"
"I am aware of your hectic schedule, Harry. You have a dilemma before you. You love Quidditch, and the Gryffindor team would be at a loss without your experience, leadership, and skill, but yet, the fate of the world as we know it rests in your hands. As much as I hate to have to put this kind of a burden on you, the prophecy proved that the only witch or wizard who had the potential to murder the Dark Lord is you."
"Enough of that stupid prophecy!" Harry yelled. The dam holding back his anger, malice, and temper broke and he let it all out. "I've heard enough of it! I don't have the chance to lead the life of a normal teenager! It all started with the scar and everyone gaping at my forehead, wondering if it was really me right in front of them and now—now it's the prophecy that I must fulfill! No pressures, eh, Harry? No extra work or burden? Your life will either end as the result of a murder or you will commit one within your lifetime. Do you think that lightens my load?!" He took the time to pause and laugh, almost maliciously. "No. The burden will never grow lighter. More will just pile itself onto the top of everything and I have to keep strong. Supposedly I can't break under the pressure and weight of everything. It all started with that stupid prophecy!" His volume started to increase again at the thought of the prophecy. "Trelawney had no idea what she was talking about, that old bat! How dare she ruin my life? How—dare she?" At that, Harry started to sob and fall into the chair. The pressure was just too much for him to handle. Here he was, a teenage boy, crying uncontrollably in front of his professor. After a few minutes, he managed to choke out a few words to Tonks. "You must think I'm even weaker now, huh? Crying and all?" He wiped his nose on the sleeve of his robes. "Look, everyone, Potter's crying! Call the presses!" Harry burst out into a new round of tears of frustration.
"No, Harry, I don't think you're weak. In fact, you're stronger than most people, showing emotions like these." The now purple-haired professor stood up and walked around her desk to comfort the teenager. She put her hand on his shoulder. "Not many people would have gotten this far even without all the other things you have taken up. Harry, I know this training is burdensome. I realize how much people expect from you. But I have seen you succeed, even with the expectations placed upon your shoulders. You're stronger than most people. I have faith that you will complete your training and become an Auror, defeating Voldemort. Keep up your spirits, Harry. It's almost the holiday season and you'll be able to take a break from these training sessions. As a matter of fact, I don't see the need to continue on tonight. Next week will be our last session before the holidays. Keep on practicing and polishing your skills and we'll continue on after the break. Good night, Harry."
"Good night."
* * *
That night the prefects walked around writing down the names of the people who would stay at Hogwarts for the holidays—at least, Hermione and Ron were coming around to collect names. Ron seemed reluctant with this task, as he was with every prefect duty. "Hermione," he whined while following her with her quill and clipboard, "why do we have to do this? No other prefects are writing down names of people staying over break, in this house or in others."
"Are you staying here at Hogwarts over the holidays?" Hermione asked a group of first year girls politely, ignoring Ron's question. Two said yes, so she took their names, thanked them, and turned around to deal with Ron.
"We're doing this to save time for Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore," she replied curtly, shooting Ron a look. "Although I don't see a we involved here." Her eyes narrowed dangerously.
"Sure, it saves them time, but it takes away from our time! I could be doing something more useful, like practicing for Quidditch or even—studying."
"If you didn't want to spend extra time on these types of things, then why did you become a prefect in the first place?"
"I didn't necessarily want to become a prefect...Dumbledore chose us, remember?"
"You always said you wanted to become one, to match your brothers' skills and abilities. Whatever happened to that proposition?"
"I just wanted the badge! I didn't know it involved this much work!"
Hermione huffed disapprovingly. "Well, then, I'll finish this by myself, thank you very much, and you can get on with your precious 'studying'." With that, she stomped off to ask others about whether or not they were staying at Hogwarts during Christmas.
"Be glad you're not a prefect, mate," Ron told Harry, running a hand through his hair. "It's twice as much work as I had anticipated and Hermione is dreadfully picky about things. Mum was ever so proud when she saw the badge, but now I'm not so sure it's worth the labor!"
* * *
Tonks didn't say anything about Harry's outburst during class or during their next training session. Harry was grateful to her for doing so. He didn't want to remember his weaknesses. After class one day, however, she told him to stay after. "Harry," she said above the noises of twenty people leaving the room at once, "could I please have a word with you?"
Curious, Harry stood up and walked over to the professor. He realized she looked exhausted, as if she hadn't had a wink of sleep in a week. "Yes?"
"Harry, Emmeline Vance is dead."
"That Auror who went missing the week before school started?"
"Yes. We found her body in the middle of a field five miles south of London. She has been dead for over a month."
"Aren't there Aurors patrolling all of Britain, as well as the world?"
"Yes, Harry, but you've heard of the Auror murders. It has become an international burden. Over a fourth of all Aurors in the world have died within the last six months. There are less people to patrol the most unlikely areas for murders or Death Eaters lurking about. No one patrolled that area for over three months."
"So what does this mean for me?"
"Emmeline Vance did not make the news much, but she was one of the best and most elite Aurors in the country. Remember your Advanced Guard who brought you here in the summer after your fourth year?"
"Yes."
"Those Aurors are the best in the country, and some are amongst the top twenty Aurors in the world."
"Including you?"
"Yes, including me. Dumbledore himself chose the Aurors especially for your case. He was the first to hear the prophecy. He knew what was at stake if you died en route to Grimmauld Place. If you had died, Voldemort would have successfully conquered the Wizarding world. He might have even had the ability to take over parts of the Muggle world."
"So, again, what does this specific Auror murder mean for me?"
"Emmeline Vance was a fully-trained Auror, and like I said before, one of the best. Harry, you must use extreme caution anywhere and everywhere you go. We can't afford to keep guard over you all day every day, so you must watch out, and now especially is when you must keep up with your training. You must become an Auror as soon as possible. Fully completing the training in two years is a stretch, but it would still be nice if you could complete it in less. Work hard, and keep up with your classes, Harry. The fate of the world rests with you."
An Aurorism in Question
"Tonks, I can't do this," Harry said one Monday evening during a training session. "It's just too much: the N.E.W.T. classes, the training, Quidditch... This sounds more like the kind of schedule Hermione would have than me. I just can't keep my grades and my Quidditch performance up anymore."
Tonks looked up at Harry and searched his eyes. "You can't, or you won't?" she questioned.
"I can't."
"You're lying."
"No, I'm not. This is just too much."
Sighing, she put her head in her hands, as if searching for answers to his testimony. "Harry, you are the one destined to vanquish Voldemort. Dark times will overcome the world if you fail."
"I know that, but it's just too much!"
"I am aware of your hectic schedule, Harry. You have a dilemma before you. You love Quidditch, and the Gryffindor team would be at a loss without your experience, leadership, and skill, but yet, the fate of the world as we know it rests in your hands. As much as I hate to have to put this kind of a burden on you, the prophecy proved that the only witch or wizard who had the potential to murder the Dark Lord is you."
"Enough of that stupid prophecy!" Harry yelled. The dam holding back his anger, malice, and temper broke and he let it all out. "I've heard enough of it! I don't have the chance to lead the life of a normal teenager! It all started with the scar and everyone gaping at my forehead, wondering if it was really me right in front of them and now—now it's the prophecy that I must fulfill! No pressures, eh, Harry? No extra work or burden? Your life will either end as the result of a murder or you will commit one within your lifetime. Do you think that lightens my load?!" He took the time to pause and laugh, almost maliciously. "No. The burden will never grow lighter. More will just pile itself onto the top of everything and I have to keep strong. Supposedly I can't break under the pressure and weight of everything. It all started with that stupid prophecy!" His volume started to increase again at the thought of the prophecy. "Trelawney had no idea what she was talking about, that old bat! How dare she ruin my life? How—dare she?" At that, Harry started to sob and fall into the chair. The pressure was just too much for him to handle. Here he was, a teenage boy, crying uncontrollably in front of his professor. After a few minutes, he managed to choke out a few words to Tonks. "You must think I'm even weaker now, huh? Crying and all?" He wiped his nose on the sleeve of his robes. "Look, everyone, Potter's crying! Call the presses!" Harry burst out into a new round of tears of frustration.
"No, Harry, I don't think you're weak. In fact, you're stronger than most people, showing emotions like these." The now purple-haired professor stood up and walked around her desk to comfort the teenager. She put her hand on his shoulder. "Not many people would have gotten this far even without all the other things you have taken up. Harry, I know this training is burdensome. I realize how much people expect from you. But I have seen you succeed, even with the expectations placed upon your shoulders. You're stronger than most people. I have faith that you will complete your training and become an Auror, defeating Voldemort. Keep up your spirits, Harry. It's almost the holiday season and you'll be able to take a break from these training sessions. As a matter of fact, I don't see the need to continue on tonight. Next week will be our last session before the holidays. Keep on practicing and polishing your skills and we'll continue on after the break. Good night, Harry."
"Good night."
* * *
That night the prefects walked around writing down the names of the people who would stay at Hogwarts for the holidays—at least, Hermione and Ron were coming around to collect names. Ron seemed reluctant with this task, as he was with every prefect duty. "Hermione," he whined while following her with her quill and clipboard, "why do we have to do this? No other prefects are writing down names of people staying over break, in this house or in others."
"Are you staying here at Hogwarts over the holidays?" Hermione asked a group of first year girls politely, ignoring Ron's question. Two said yes, so she took their names, thanked them, and turned around to deal with Ron.
"We're doing this to save time for Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore," she replied curtly, shooting Ron a look. "Although I don't see a we involved here." Her eyes narrowed dangerously.
"Sure, it saves them time, but it takes away from our time! I could be doing something more useful, like practicing for Quidditch or even—studying."
"If you didn't want to spend extra time on these types of things, then why did you become a prefect in the first place?"
"I didn't necessarily want to become a prefect...Dumbledore chose us, remember?"
"You always said you wanted to become one, to match your brothers' skills and abilities. Whatever happened to that proposition?"
"I just wanted the badge! I didn't know it involved this much work!"
Hermione huffed disapprovingly. "Well, then, I'll finish this by myself, thank you very much, and you can get on with your precious 'studying'." With that, she stomped off to ask others about whether or not they were staying at Hogwarts during Christmas.
"Be glad you're not a prefect, mate," Ron told Harry, running a hand through his hair. "It's twice as much work as I had anticipated and Hermione is dreadfully picky about things. Mum was ever so proud when she saw the badge, but now I'm not so sure it's worth the labor!"
* * *
Tonks didn't say anything about Harry's outburst during class or during their next training session. Harry was grateful to her for doing so. He didn't want to remember his weaknesses. After class one day, however, she told him to stay after. "Harry," she said above the noises of twenty people leaving the room at once, "could I please have a word with you?"
Curious, Harry stood up and walked over to the professor. He realized she looked exhausted, as if she hadn't had a wink of sleep in a week. "Yes?"
"Harry, Emmeline Vance is dead."
"That Auror who went missing the week before school started?"
"Yes. We found her body in the middle of a field five miles south of London. She has been dead for over a month."
"Aren't there Aurors patrolling all of Britain, as well as the world?"
"Yes, Harry, but you've heard of the Auror murders. It has become an international burden. Over a fourth of all Aurors in the world have died within the last six months. There are less people to patrol the most unlikely areas for murders or Death Eaters lurking about. No one patrolled that area for over three months."
"So what does this mean for me?"
"Emmeline Vance did not make the news much, but she was one of the best and most elite Aurors in the country. Remember your Advanced Guard who brought you here in the summer after your fourth year?"
"Yes."
"Those Aurors are the best in the country, and some are amongst the top twenty Aurors in the world."
"Including you?"
"Yes, including me. Dumbledore himself chose the Aurors especially for your case. He was the first to hear the prophecy. He knew what was at stake if you died en route to Grimmauld Place. If you had died, Voldemort would have successfully conquered the Wizarding world. He might have even had the ability to take over parts of the Muggle world."
"So, again, what does this specific Auror murder mean for me?"
"Emmeline Vance was a fully-trained Auror, and like I said before, one of the best. Harry, you must use extreme caution anywhere and everywhere you go. We can't afford to keep guard over you all day every day, so you must watch out, and now especially is when you must keep up with your training. You must become an Auror as soon as possible. Fully completing the training in two years is a stretch, but it would still be nice if you could complete it in less. Work hard, and keep up with your classes, Harry. The fate of the world rests with you."
