Note: we don't own anything but Tatra and Catty, and their insanity. Please review so I can thank you!

Chapter Ten - A couch that was once a plant

"I love you Draco," Catty said loudly.

"Well I don't like you!" Draco replied.

"Yes you do!" Catty said.

"No I don't!" Draco repeated.

"I'm the girl everybody loves!" Catty said innocently, "See?"

All the boys from Hogwarts rushed in, even the ones who were sent away and hadn't returned yet, and said at the same time, "I love you Catty!" then they rushed off.

"Told you!" Catty said.

"Well I don't love you! Anyway, if all the boys love you, then why do you torture me?" Draco asked.

"Cause you're too cute!" Catty exclaimed.

Draco groaned.

Catty smiled sweetly.

Just then all of the students came in. Every one of them avoided Catty, Tatra, Draco, and his hair.

"One of you will have to sit next to Tatra, we don't have that many extra seats," McGonagall said.

"I'll sit next to Tatra!" Catty said.

"You already are," McGonagall replied.

"Well, if there were two of me I'd sit next to her twice," Catty said.

McGonagall sighed, "You'll have to sit next to Tatra."

The boy who was the last one standing sat down next to Tatra reluctantly.

Tatra made a face and the desk turned orange.

Catty reached over her to pat the boy who was now sitting next to Tatra on the head, with the arm that was attached to Draco.

"Hey!" Draco exclaimed as he was dragged across the desk, and Catty.

"Are you a horse too?" Tatra asked.

"No, I'm a wizard," Draco said.

"No, you're not," Catty said.

"What do you mean?" Draco asked.

"Do you know how to turn a plant into a couch?" Catty asked.

"No," Draco answered.

"Then you're not a wizard," Catty said.

"Well, technically, not yet," Hermione said, "none of us are."

"Not until you know how to turn a plant into a couch," Catty said.

"Minerva-chan, can you teach us how to turn a plant into a couch?" Tatra asked.

"Why?" McGonagall asked.

"Cause I want to be a wizard," Tatra replied.

"You wouldn't be a wizard, you'd be a witch," Draco said.

"But Catty said you're a wizard when you learn how to turn a plant into a couch," Tatra said.

McGonagall sighed.

"I wish I was a genie so I could live in one of those pretty bottles full of cushions, and I'd get to be tiny," Catty said suddenly.

"I wish I could fly without wings, and shoot energy balls from my hands, or from my mouth, or eyes, but I wouldn't like to turn into a giant monkey whenever I looked at the moon," Tatra said just as suddenly.

With a snap of her fingers, Catty's lips blew up fifteen times bigger than they should have been. They took up most of her face.

She turned to Draco, then yelled, "Give me a kiss, honey!"

Draco looked HORRIFIED!

"Professor McGonagall!" Draco yelled.

By the time McGonagall turned around, Catty's lips were normal.

"Um, never mind," Draco said, beginning to blush.

McGonagall said nothing, knowing that Draco was stuck next to Catty.

Catty smiled sweetly.

It was clear that everyone felt sorry for Draco...and his hair.

"For today's lesson we will turn a cactus into a pincushion," McGonagall said, "would you hand the cactuses out Hermione, don't rush."

"Yes professor," Hermione said as she stood up.

Tatra stood up as well. She hurried up to the cactuses and started tapping them with her wand, turning them different colors.

The second one of the cactuses turned color, Catty rushed up and sent them sailing out the window.

Soon all of them were gone.

McGonagall sighed and then said, "I was going to save this till the next lesson, but, under the circumstances, we will do it today."

McGonagall took out some straws out of her desk.

"Hermione, pass these around instead, we will be turning to straws into quills."

Hermione got to the straws before Tatra and Catty.

Catty poked Draco's arm while Hermione passed out the straws.

"What was that for?" Draco asked.

"Nothing, I'm just bored," she replied.

"There's something in my straw," Tatra, who had been looking into her straw, stated.

She reached into her straw and pulled out a rock the size of Harry's head, in fact, it looked just like Harry's head, it even had glasses.

"So that's where my statue of Harry's head went!" Catty exclaimed, taking the head.

Catty put the head in her bag and then poked Draco again.

The class was awestruck.

Catty turned her straw into a quill, then began to write on Draco with it.

Tatra tapped her straw and it turned into a silly-slammer. She then threw it over her shoulder, it landed on Cole's desk and then said, "I need it NOW!"

"I need a new straw!" Tatra yelled.

McGonagall gave Tatra a new straw. Tatra tapped it and it turned into a roll of toilet tissue. She threw it over her shoulder and it landed on Buffy's desk.

McGonagall gave Tatra another straw and this time it turned into a quill when she tapped it.

Tatra started doodling on her desk.

Draco turned to Catty and loudly yelled, "LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"I can't do that!" Catty yelled even louder.

"Why not!" Draco asked.

"Cuz I'm stuck on you!" She replied, waving her arm attacked to him madly in the air.

"Professor! Can you tell Snape to hurry it up!" Draco yelled the last part.

"Tell him to slow it down first!" Catty called.

"I will tell him when class is over, has everyone finished their straws?" McGonagall asked.

"Yes," the class replied.

"Then class is over, I'll see you later," McGonagall said.

Catty dragged Draco out of the room as fast as she could.

Tatra followed Catty, Draco, and his hair.

"Wonder where they're going," Harry said.

"To the mall," Tatra answered before leaving again.

"What's a mall?" Ron asked.

"A place where muggles shop for things," Harry replied.

"Bingo!" Tatra said before leaving once again.

Catty, Draco and his hair were LONG gone, but Tatra was catching up.

Hermione shrugged and said, "Let's get going."

The halls were pretty much empty.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione went up to the Gryffindor common room. Harry and Ron started to play chess while Hermione read a book.

Fred and George slowly crept into the room.

"Are they gone?" Fred asked.

"Who?" Ron asked.

"Catty and Tatra!" George replied.

"For now," Harry answered.

"Yes, we're gone for now, but we'll be back!" Tatra said before going out the portrait door.

Fred and George disappeared as fast as they could.

"Shouldn't we be afraid? If my brothers are afraid of them..." Ron trailed off.

"I'm not THAT afraid, are you Hermione?" Harry asked.

"No, not really, I'm just afraid of what Hogwarts is going to be like when they get through with it," Hermione answered.

"It definitely won't be the same," Harry admitted.

Ron looked uneasy.

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked.

"Wasn't the Gryffindor Lion supposed to be gold?" Ron asked.

"Yes," Hermione answered.

"Why?" Harry asked.

"Look," Ron croaked as he pointed.

Harry and Hermione turned, looked up and gasped.

The Gryffindor Lion was now tie-dyed!

"Who... Who did that?" Harry asked.

"We did, Catty and me!" Tatra answered before she left again.

"Those two really freak me out," Harry said.

Suddenly every thing turned tie-dyed, even the fire!

"I want to go home," Ron whined, "as far as I know, things are normal there."

"I think I'd rather take my chances here than go back to the Dursley's," Harry said.

"I wonder," Hermione said, "do you think that Dumbledore will send everyone home until they leave?"

"No, I don't think so," Harry replied.

"I hope he does though," Ron replied.

"Silly wizards, Trix are for kids!" Tatra said as she poured a box of Trix on the trio's heads.

Hermione screamed.

"$500, $500, $500!" Ron screamed suddenly.

"Wow! I can make people say things!" Catty said suddenly, as she appeared, "I made you say that Ron! But that's the only thing I can make people say."

"Where's Draco?" Hermione asked.

"He's paying for a dress that he found at the mall," Catty answered.

"He's what!" The trio exclaimed.

"Paying for a dress that he found at the mall," Tatra repeated what Catty had said.

Suddenly Draco appeared in a dress and when he appeared, he appeared attached to Catty.

He looked VERY unhappy.

"She picked it out and made me wear it!" Draco exclaimed.

"We all know that's not true, so don't pretend it is," Catty joked.

"I'm not pretending," Draco protested.

"Sure your not," Catty replied.

"Really!" Draco insisted.

"Yeah, okay," Catty replied.

Hermione, Harry, and Ron stood there and stared in awe.

"Doesn't he look just so cute in a dress?" Catty asked.

"You two are insane!" Draco yelled.

"Thank you," Catty replied, "that's such a compliment coming from you."

Draco looked at her as if she was an alien.

"Cooooookie crisp!" Tatra yelled as she emptied a box of Cookie Crisp on the trio's head.

"I want to be an Oreo," Catty whined suddenly.

"Why did I have to get stuck with YOU?" Draco asked.

"Just lucky I guess," Catty replied happily.

"Yeah, you could of been stuck with Bob," Tatra said.

"Who's Bob?" Draco asked.

"The sock puppet," Tatra answered.

"What sock puppet?" Draco asked.

"You mean you don't remember?" Tatra asked.

Draco shook his head no.

"He's the mascot for your house!" Tatra said in disbelief.

"But our house mascot is a serpent," Draco said, confused.

"Not anymore," Tatra said.

Draco ran to the Slytherine common room, dragging Catty along with him, and checked the picture of their mascot. It had changed from the silver Serpent to a blue sock puppet with pink hair.

Draco screamed with horror and Catty screamed just to copy and annoy Draco.

"They're Great!" Tatra yelled as she dumped a box of Frosted Flakes on the trio's heads.

"How do you make a tissue dance?" Catty asked, then with out waiting for a reply said, "you put a little boogey in it!"

"Very funny," Draco said.

"You're coo-coo for Coco Puffs!" Tatra said as she poured a box of Coco Puffs on Draco and Catty's heads.

"No, she's coo, coo period," Draco said, referring to Catty

"Oops, I forgot the milk!" Tatra snapped her fingers and Draco and Catty were covered in milk.

With a snap of Catty's fingers Tatra became covered in green, gooey slime. Then Catty said, "You're crazy about slime!"

"Yes I am, and so is Bob!" Tatra said as she pointed to the sock puppet.

Bob was covered in green slime.

"I want some raison brain," Catty announced.

"You just won $500!" Tatra replied.

"$500!?" Catty exclaimed.

"$500!" Tatra replied.

"Alright!" Catty exclaimed.

Tatra handed Catty $500 in Monopoly money.

Catty threw the money up in the air, then shouted, "Whoopie!"

Draco snorted.

"Got milk?" Tatra asked.

"Yes, all over me," Draco replied sourly.

"Meditation time!" Catty screamed suddenly, and loudly.

Suddenly every one at Hogwarts was sitting Indian style and going "ooohm, oohm!" Thirty seconds later, everyone was back to normal.

"What just happened?" Harry asked.

"I don't know," Catty lied, popping up behind the trio, with out Draco.

"Who knows," Ron said.

"No one knows about your nose, but those who know, knows," Catty said, trying to make no sense at all.

"Huh," Ron said.

She repeated herself more slowly.

"Whatever," Ron replied.

"Whatever do you mean?" Tatra, who had just came into the common room attached to Draco, said.

"Nothing," Ron muttered as he moved away.

"You can have Draco back now," Tatra said as she peeled Draco off herself and handed him to Catty.

"Thankies," Catty said as she hugged Draco.

Draco groaned, and was reattached to Catty.

"Now what?" Tatra asked.

"Let's get more names for our petition," Catty suggested.

"Alright," Tatra agreed.

"What petition?" Draco asked.

Tatra and Catty didn't answer, they just left, dragging Draco.