Some hours later everyone was stuffed full of food, not to mention beer and Elven wine. Already slightly tipsy, Gimli made a very rash decision. Standing up on his chair he banged his goblet on the table for quiet.

  'I,' the dwarf began, swaying very slightly, 'I, Gimli son of Gloin of the lonely mountain, challenge any here brave enough to a contest of endurance.

  'Endurance of what precisely, Master Dwarf?' asked Aragorn, grinning with his suspicion of Gimli's answer.

  'Alcohol!' He replied. 'Any kind they choose!'

Legolas opened his mouth to tell Gimli not to be foolish, but Aragorn reached across behind the dwarf and touched the elf's arm. At Legolas' questioning look he winked, this could prove to be amusing.

  'Very well, Legolas said, 'Gimli, I accept your challenge.

  'As do I!' called Aragorn. 'This may be my last chance to be un-kingly before the city council catches up with me!' the former ranger laughed.

    The four hobbits, Gandalf, Eomer, Faramir and Prince Imrahil also declared their intention to compete. Eowyn looked like she was also going to accept, but Arwen shook her head.

  'We ladies shall leave you to your revelry. Come Eowyn, they will all regret this decision on the morrow.' The radiant new queen gave her husband a gentle kiss on his cheek and then rose to lead the ladies to their quarters. The men of Rohan and Gondor also took their leave, muttering about duties the next morning.

    When the doors had swung closed behind them the remaining men called the servants to fetch as much wine and ale as they were able.

  'Shall we say last man standing triumphs?' commented a smiling Gandalf. 'Or last Wizard, Elf, Dwarf or Hobbit as it may be. I wonder where Elrond is, he never used to miss a drinking contest.'

Sam choked on the ale he was drinking.

  'Lord Elrond, drinking contests?!' he spluttered. 'But he always seems so serious, beggin' your pardon, sir.'

Gandalf banged the hobbit on the back.

  'Yes Sam, he is now, but he wasn't always so responsible. Not during the second age, anyway! I'll tell you about it sometime.'

  'Well,' Gimli announced when all glasses and goblets were filled. 'The last one standing is the winner. Let the toasts commence!'

    From that point on, the atmosphere became distinctly informal. Toasts started fairly sensible, but after the first twenty or so things got slightly rude.

  'A toast!' yelled Gimli. 'To the eternal happiness of our new king and queen. May they produce many heirs and ever be busy in the bed-chamber!'

  'A toast to my dearest Arwen! May her beauty never fail before my manhood does!' hiccupped Aragorn, spilling his wine as he drank. Faramir laughed uncontrollably.

  'A toast to second breakfast!' bellowed Pippin.

  'Hear hear!' agreed Merry. 'I toast Frodo, for bravery in the face of nasty things!'

Frodo's reply was covered by a loud crash as Sam fell unconscious off his chair. The Ringbearer giggled so hard he dropped his ale. A grinning servant replaced it immediately while another went to carry Sam to his chamber.

  'One down!' cried Eomer.

Servants were being kept very busy refilling glasses, many struggling not to laugh at the toasts being yelled.

  'I toast the beauty of the lady Galadriel! Here's to the nicest breasts in Middle Earth! Shouted Gimli. The dwarf was red in the face and had to struggle to stand up. Comparatively, Legolas and Imrahil, because of their Elven heritage, were fairly sober. The remaining hobbits were paralytic. As he tried to stand to give the next toast Merry lost consciousness.

  'Two down! And it doesn't look good for the hobbits!' snorted Aragorn.

Legolas rose to his feet with slightly less poise than usual.

  'I toast the sun, the stars and the beauty of women!' he declaimed and took a huge drink of wine, draining his glass in one. Seeing this, all the rest downed their drinks. Frodo swayed as he lowered his goblet. He blinked once or twice, hiccupped and fell to the floor, followed closely by Pippin.

  'Four down! It's all over for the hobbits!' giggled Imrahil, finally showing the effects of the ale.

  'New rule!' Faramir said thickly. 'Each toast must be a whole glass in one! This should separate the men from the orcs!'

  'So be it! I toast the freedom of the plains and the warmth of a pretty woman's flesh against your own!' Eomer toasted rudely. They all downed a glass of alcohol, laughing.

  'I salute the Valar, and the gift of the ability to love Eru gave us!' Gandalf said. His hat had fallen off and as he tried to drink his own toast he slid gently off his chair.

  'Five down!'

  'I toast dwarven women, the best of all in the bedroom!' said Gimli loudly. He drank, but halfway through the goblet his stomach rebelled and he vomited.

  'oops….' He began, but he couldn't finish as he collapsed, too drunk to stay conscious.

  'Gimli loses!' Legolas laughed tipsily. 'Six down!'

  'I toast the folly of those who start contests they cannot stomach!' bellowed Aragorn.

  'I'll toast that!' roared Eomer, taking a huge gulp of beer. Beside him Faramir slipped down in his chair as he fell asleep. Noticing, Imrahil yelled,

  'Seven do..!' he failed to complete his comment. He joined the others in unconsciousness. The faint traces of Elven blood in his veins had not been enough to keep him sober.

  'Correction Imrahil,' said Aragorn. 'I make it eight down!'

  'Three left. Who'll make the next toast?' asked Eomer.

Legolas stood again, this time completely lacking Elven grace.

  'Umm….' He declared eloquently, trying to think of a new toast. The Wood-Elf had drunk a lot of wine before the competition even started and now his brain seemed to have been stolen. 'Umm.. I toast our sires and grandsires for loving our mothers and grandmothers and making their love known physically!' He took a mouthful of wine, choked and fainted to the floor.

  'Two to go!' said Aragorn. 'I salute women, for their grace and beauty, not to mention their bodies!'

  'I'll definitely toast that!' agreed the new King of Rohan.  The two kings gulped down their drinks.

  'Your turn.' muttered Aragorn.

  'Mfff..' replied Eomer. 'Where's the table?' he wondered stupidly, resting his drunken head on it and falling asleep. Aragorn prodded him, the man didn't move.

  'Ten down! I win!' The King of Gondor grinned slowly. He heaved himself out of his chair and raised his glass.

  'I declare a toast to me!' he drank the wine and collapsed as his knees gave way.

    Laughing and joking at the expense of the unconscious lords the servants moved in to carry them to their beds and clean up.