Disclaimer: I don't own Slayers; if I did, it would be a lot longer and have about four spin-off series. Nor am I profiting from this story, except through the psychological benefit of getting it out of my head. Also, I have no source of income, so suing me would probably hurt you more than me. Starbird and Dulak, on the on the hand, do belong to me, and I'd appreciate it if they weren't used by anyone else, at least for now.

Slayers: The Starbird Chronicles

Chapter 1: At Starbird Manor, in the Empire of Elmekia. 2 Weeks later.

He was in the kitchen when the news arrived; this makes sense, since he was cooking. He knew as well as anyone else that the kitchen in any place fancy enough to call itself a Manor was supposed to be the exclusive domain of maids and servants; he just didn't care. He enjoyed cooking, and was secure enough in his masculinity to admit it. However, the servants and maids did mind, and, despite his continued pleas, tried among themselves to pretend it wasn't happening.

In this latest case, however, he had been in there, working on his latest project, for over two hours, and it was beginning to cause tension among the staff who could not, on their consciences, enter. He knew this, but there wasn't anything he could do. When a magical recipe says to stir constantly over medium heat until it comes to a full boil, you stir constantly over medium heat until it comes to a full boil, even if it takes all day and the building is falling down around your ears.

Of course, he wasn't preparing a magical recipe, he was making chocolate pudding. There was no need to be so careful, but he prepared enough magical recipes that he had fallen into the habit.

A sudden ruckus outside the kitchen door alerted him that the staff had a new distraction – instead of pretending he wasn't cooking among themselves, they now had someone else to hide it from. The door to the kitchen burst open, and the new arrival, shrouded in a brown cloak, stumbled into the room, dragging three kicking and screaming maids latched on to his waist and legs.

"Master Starbird... If you'd kindly call off the Lyzeillian Attack Maids..."

"Right. You three can go away now. The... ah... damage... is done." The three servants looked up, then let go and backed out of the room, bowing and apologizing the whole way while still averting their eyes. "I'm sorry," said Starbird, turning as much as he could while still stirring the pudding, "I wasn't expecting anyone, or I wouldn't be in here. They seem to think that it's shameful for the master of the house to be seen cooking, and they're very emphatic about not letting it happen."

"It's not your fault, I know." The cloaked figure removed his hood.

"Dulak? Is that you? Of course, I thought I recognized the voice..." The face was that of the Greybat Daemon scout he'd sent out from the wedding near Atlas City two weeks earlier.

"Yes, master Starbird. I've brought you the information you asked for."

"About the Mazoku?"

"Yes. I can confirm the deaths of both Chaos-Dragon Gaav and Hellmaster Phibrizzo; I have the documentation right here, if you'd like to read it." The Daemon reached into the folds of his cloak with one thumb-claw and withdrew a sheaf of paper, which he laid on the table.

"Thanks, I'll trust your word. Um, aren't you back kinda early? I mean, normally, it takes you a month to make the circuit, and it's only been two weeks since you left..."

"That brings me to the second piece of information. The situation up north has gotten so much worse that I didn't even dare go more than half a mile out over the ocean. I headed straight back as soon as I saw that, so those missing two weeks are the entire northern leg of the circuit, from Kataart on."

Starbird froze in shock. Except for the hand that was stirring, of course; it kept on its merry way (old habits die hard. Especially ones intended to keep you from getting blown up)."That's... not good. Not good at all..."

"No. Luckily, I also spotted our target in Ralteague, heading toward Kalmaart. Alone."

"That is good. Especially in the face of that last... Right. I need you to fly north to the port cities on Kalmaart's northern coast; try to find a ship going to the Northern Lands. Can you give me a map of her movement?"

"Already got one; it's at the back of the packet, there."

"Good man. Tell the butler to put you down for a double bonus before you leave. Anyway, you'll probably be searching for a ship for some time, but when you find one, book a place on it. Take a hundred gold pieces from the treasury; that should cover it... I'll go to her, see if she's up to it, and meet up with you in about two weeks; If I'm not there in three, come looking."

"I'll depart immediately. And you?"

"It'll take a while to get my stuff together, so I won't be leaving 'till tomorrow morning. You're welcome to stay..."

"No, I think I'll get a head start. Farewell." With that, the Daemon turned and left; the Maids were quieter on the way out.

Now, to get my stuff together. Starbird glared at the barely-bubbling pot of pudding. As soon as this is done...

Author Note: There, more happened, this time. Better? Worse? I'd really like to know, so Reviewez, S'il Vous Plait.

1) For locations in this story, I'm using the map of the subcontinent found at the website "Slayers Universe." The site is located at www.inverse.org, and the map is under Resources World Geography 2.

2) In the first version of the story's route, I had placed Zangulus' and martina's wedding in Atlas city, partially because it's the closest city to Sairaag on the map, and partially because I didn't know where Xoana was. However, after a significant amount of work (i.e., watching the entire first episode of TRY one frame at a time, aren't DVD players wonderful things, and squinting at the maps while it was paused), I was able to locate Xoana in the southeast part of the Alliance of Coastal States. As this is rather more convenient for the route I had in mind, I am now officially stating that, for the purposes of this story, the wedding took place in Xoana (in a different city than the capitol, which Lina destroyed).

3) Starbird's Manor is, for anyone who wants to know, on a piece of land just on the Elmekian side of the mutual border point between Elmekia, Saillune, and Zeiphielia. Starbird got there faster than his target (Lina, if you haven't figured it out) got to near Kalmaart through a combination of two factors: he traveled straight home, while Lina headed off following the coast, and he traveled faster, flying most of the way (Or, alternately, he used a warp well he had set up; I don't know which).

4) Wouldn't "Lyzeillian Attack Maids" be a great name for a Rock Band (or at least an Anime)? Yes, I am a Dave Barry Fan, so sue me (but read the disclaimer first).

Next Chapter: Lina at Last!