Ja, ja!
by Sad WTF
Chapter 6. Doc's Feverish Desire to KILL Piggy
"Goodbye and good riddance to you all!" screamed Sweaty Officer #1, as he waved goodbye to everyone. Piggy leered as the Nazis he was in 'charge' of all piled into the awaiting zeppelin. Doc was red from anger at the stupidity of traveling in a zeppelin, but who could stop the stubborn Piggy?
The zeppelin rose into the air and started its slow flight towards South America. Inside, everything was completely silent since Doc had plastered "No laughing, moving, talking, shouting, etc. etc. etc... OR ELSE WTF" signs all over the place, afraid that any movement would produce static electricity or something that would cause the whole airship to explode. The laughing Nazis were turning purple from trying to keep themselves from laughing.
Finally, after a long time that couldn't even be described in large random numbers, they finally reached Brazil. Piggy looked around and demanded that they land in Rio de Jenairo. Everyone tumbled out, and the laughing Nazis started to laugh. This caused the zeppelin to blow up behind them. Doc glared at everyone with the I-told-you-so-you-stupid-bastards look. Piggy took no notice of it and looked around him again. He squealed with delight when he found out the blown up zeppelin had left a huge gaping hole in the area, perfect for building a secret base.
Piggy waddled over to Doc. "Doc? Doc!" screamed Piggy. But Doc pretended not to notice. Piggy screamed for a few moments before Doc finally looked down at Piggy.
"YES?" asked Doc, gritting his teeth. He wanted to stuff Piggy into a crate and drop him into the sea.
Piggy leered up at Doc, eyes bulging. "I want you to build me a secret base."
Doc glared. "No."
Piggy couldn't believe his ears. "What!?"
"I said no."
Piggy stomped his foot. "How come!?"
"I don't know how."
Piggy was shocked. How could Doc not know how to build a secret base? Doc was a genius! But stupid Piggy didn't realize Doc was genius enough to refuse. WTF. So Piggy had to run all around South America, trying to find someone that could build him a base. Schrodinger started to run after Piggy, but he got lost and wandered into a forest and didn't come back for many days. When he returned, he had been bitten by a werewolf, and had made 2340985 werewolf friends. Doc's face fell with horror as all these Schrodinger look-alikes wandered around the vacant lot that was currently their base.
Schrodinger discussed with his friends for many many days, and then they decided to dig holes in the ground. When Piggy returned, he squealed with immense pleasure. What a great idea! He ran up to Doc. "Look, Doc! We could build our base underground! Let's build tents in that hole!"
Doc merely rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to kill Piggy. Captain almost strangled Piggy, but he decided there were too many witnesses or something.
While everyone was busy with building the secret base, Doc and Captain stood around, twiddling their thumbs. That's when reports came in that people requested more Doc and Captain in this "fic" than there already was, as if people weren't sick enough of them already (except for me, I love them to bits. SICK), there came an overwhelming wave of MORE Doc and Captain.
Yes! You can buy Doc and Captain merchandise at www.docandcaptain.com! Browse through our vast range of mugs, shirts, plushies, posters, figurines, mousepads, robots, clones, and all those essential items just perfect for your Doc and Captain collections! Doc and Captain! Get yours today!
Doc and Captain blinked at the stupid pointless ad that had just appeared next to them. Doc stomped on it until it was no more. Captain looked off into the distance and counted the dots in his speech bubble. Doc looked around and started to whistle. Captain frowned. Then they looked this way and that. Finally, Doc broke the silence, scowling as he spoke.
"Really, I can't work under these conditions."
"Neither can I," said Captain. "It's rather unnerving to think you're being watched."
"We'll have to think of something to entertain our viewers," said Doc, an evil (or not evil, depending on how you look at it) smile appearing on his face. "Like... Killing Piggy, perhaps?"
Captain smiled and nodded. What a wonderful idea! If they killed Piggy, everyone would be free!
...Yes, how wonderful it would have been, if they could have killed Piggy. Very unfortunately, Piggy was invincible because of his jiggly fatness. No weapon could hurt him. Damn that Piggy. Why wouldn't he die? But who cares? We're getting sidetracked here. Schrodinger and his friends had finished building the stupid base.
Piggy threatened to poke Doc and Captain's eyes out, so Doc had to make some freak chips. Piggy sent most of them to Luke and Jan to sell to everyone. Who knows how Piggy knew where they were? I bet he used a plothole to mess with Doc's trajectory when he threw them to England, so that they would land in the whorish boot camp. Filthy Piggy.
Piggy cackled violently, delighted that his plans had gone so well. He quickly grabbed everyone to hide in the secret base. Millenium dived into the hole and didn't come out for many years.
Years and years later, closer to the present day, a random South American movie star/gangster decided to dig a hole in the ground for no reason at all. He screamed when he discovered what was in the hole. No, it wasn't Millenium.
Actually, I lied. It was Millenium.
Piggy shrieked as he sprang from his hole in the ground, absolutely delighted. "Mein fuhrer!" screamed Piggy. "I will aid you with my magnificent vampire army!"
"Ehem," said the South American movie star/gangster. "I'm sorry, but WWII ended quite some time ago. "THE LEADER" guy is dead."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" (And so on and so forth.)
Doc looked at Piggy, hoping that Piggy would die out of sheer agony. But Piggy didn't die. He jumped up after several more moments of shouting, and looked around him with fire in his eyes. Piggy had gone partially insane. (Yes, partially more insane than he was before.) "I'm going to destroy the world now!"
"Oh, for the love of GOD!" screamed Doc.
Why wouldn't Piggy just DIE!? ARGHDAFLK WTF!
---
To be continued, once again. Sorry about the not-so-great chapter. Didn't have much time today, and was determined to finish it by today. Next chapter will be the last chapter of this story. =( It will probably be longer than the others had been. And Kelli Bray, sorry about the lack of Iscariot. The timeline just doesn't find any space for Iscariot to appear in. But don't worry, I was planning on writing an Iscariot centered "fic" after my Millenium one.
by Sad WTF
Chapter 6. Doc's Feverish Desire to KILL Piggy
"Goodbye and good riddance to you all!" screamed Sweaty Officer #1, as he waved goodbye to everyone. Piggy leered as the Nazis he was in 'charge' of all piled into the awaiting zeppelin. Doc was red from anger at the stupidity of traveling in a zeppelin, but who could stop the stubborn Piggy?
The zeppelin rose into the air and started its slow flight towards South America. Inside, everything was completely silent since Doc had plastered "No laughing, moving, talking, shouting, etc. etc. etc... OR ELSE WTF" signs all over the place, afraid that any movement would produce static electricity or something that would cause the whole airship to explode. The laughing Nazis were turning purple from trying to keep themselves from laughing.
Finally, after a long time that couldn't even be described in large random numbers, they finally reached Brazil. Piggy looked around and demanded that they land in Rio de Jenairo. Everyone tumbled out, and the laughing Nazis started to laugh. This caused the zeppelin to blow up behind them. Doc glared at everyone with the I-told-you-so-you-stupid-bastards look. Piggy took no notice of it and looked around him again. He squealed with delight when he found out the blown up zeppelin had left a huge gaping hole in the area, perfect for building a secret base.
Piggy waddled over to Doc. "Doc? Doc!" screamed Piggy. But Doc pretended not to notice. Piggy screamed for a few moments before Doc finally looked down at Piggy.
"YES?" asked Doc, gritting his teeth. He wanted to stuff Piggy into a crate and drop him into the sea.
Piggy leered up at Doc, eyes bulging. "I want you to build me a secret base."
Doc glared. "No."
Piggy couldn't believe his ears. "What!?"
"I said no."
Piggy stomped his foot. "How come!?"
"I don't know how."
Piggy was shocked. How could Doc not know how to build a secret base? Doc was a genius! But stupid Piggy didn't realize Doc was genius enough to refuse. WTF. So Piggy had to run all around South America, trying to find someone that could build him a base. Schrodinger started to run after Piggy, but he got lost and wandered into a forest and didn't come back for many days. When he returned, he had been bitten by a werewolf, and had made 2340985 werewolf friends. Doc's face fell with horror as all these Schrodinger look-alikes wandered around the vacant lot that was currently their base.
Schrodinger discussed with his friends for many many days, and then they decided to dig holes in the ground. When Piggy returned, he squealed with immense pleasure. What a great idea! He ran up to Doc. "Look, Doc! We could build our base underground! Let's build tents in that hole!"
Doc merely rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to kill Piggy. Captain almost strangled Piggy, but he decided there were too many witnesses or something.
While everyone was busy with building the secret base, Doc and Captain stood around, twiddling their thumbs. That's when reports came in that people requested more Doc and Captain in this "fic" than there already was, as if people weren't sick enough of them already (except for me, I love them to bits. SICK), there came an overwhelming wave of MORE Doc and Captain.
Yes! You can buy Doc and Captain merchandise at www.docandcaptain.com! Browse through our vast range of mugs, shirts, plushies, posters, figurines, mousepads, robots, clones, and all those essential items just perfect for your Doc and Captain collections! Doc and Captain! Get yours today!
Doc and Captain blinked at the stupid pointless ad that had just appeared next to them. Doc stomped on it until it was no more. Captain looked off into the distance and counted the dots in his speech bubble. Doc looked around and started to whistle. Captain frowned. Then they looked this way and that. Finally, Doc broke the silence, scowling as he spoke.
"Really, I can't work under these conditions."
"Neither can I," said Captain. "It's rather unnerving to think you're being watched."
"We'll have to think of something to entertain our viewers," said Doc, an evil (or not evil, depending on how you look at it) smile appearing on his face. "Like... Killing Piggy, perhaps?"
Captain smiled and nodded. What a wonderful idea! If they killed Piggy, everyone would be free!
...Yes, how wonderful it would have been, if they could have killed Piggy. Very unfortunately, Piggy was invincible because of his jiggly fatness. No weapon could hurt him. Damn that Piggy. Why wouldn't he die? But who cares? We're getting sidetracked here. Schrodinger and his friends had finished building the stupid base.
Piggy threatened to poke Doc and Captain's eyes out, so Doc had to make some freak chips. Piggy sent most of them to Luke and Jan to sell to everyone. Who knows how Piggy knew where they were? I bet he used a plothole to mess with Doc's trajectory when he threw them to England, so that they would land in the whorish boot camp. Filthy Piggy.
Piggy cackled violently, delighted that his plans had gone so well. He quickly grabbed everyone to hide in the secret base. Millenium dived into the hole and didn't come out for many years.
Years and years later, closer to the present day, a random South American movie star/gangster decided to dig a hole in the ground for no reason at all. He screamed when he discovered what was in the hole. No, it wasn't Millenium.
Actually, I lied. It was Millenium.
Piggy shrieked as he sprang from his hole in the ground, absolutely delighted. "Mein fuhrer!" screamed Piggy. "I will aid you with my magnificent vampire army!"
"Ehem," said the South American movie star/gangster. "I'm sorry, but WWII ended quite some time ago. "THE LEADER" guy is dead."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" (And so on and so forth.)
Doc looked at Piggy, hoping that Piggy would die out of sheer agony. But Piggy didn't die. He jumped up after several more moments of shouting, and looked around him with fire in his eyes. Piggy had gone partially insane. (Yes, partially more insane than he was before.) "I'm going to destroy the world now!"
"Oh, for the love of GOD!" screamed Doc.
Why wouldn't Piggy just DIE!? ARGHDAFLK WTF!
---
To be continued, once again. Sorry about the not-so-great chapter. Didn't have much time today, and was determined to finish it by today. Next chapter will be the last chapter of this story. =( It will probably be longer than the others had been. And Kelli Bray, sorry about the lack of Iscariot. The timeline just doesn't find any space for Iscariot to appear in. But don't worry, I was planning on writing an Iscariot centered "fic" after my Millenium one.
