"Pressure's dropping, weak pulse." A voice echoed around her, and she struggled to open her eyes, but she remained in darkness.

"Any ID?"

"Phoebe! Her name's Phoebe." A voice burst into the room, and she recognised it instantly. It was him.

"Who's that?"

"Some guy who brought her in."

Voices flitted around her, drifting in and out of her mind as she pushed herself, desperate to open her eyes, to see once again. To see his face one last time, to make a memory of those eyes, that smile.

"She's waking up," he said, and she felt someone grab her hand, enveloping hers in theirs, and almost at once her whole body filled with warmth.

***

"You scared me there for a minute," Chandler smiled, as Phoebe, propped up in the hospital bed, shifted uncomfortably.

"Sorry," she mumbled, her head hanging low so her hair fell into her face, like curtains being drawn over her soul. "You can go now."

"Are you kidding? I can't leave you here," Chandler said, his face suddenly serious. "You can go tomorrow, they're keeping you in one night for observation."

"Then you'll leave me alone?" Phoebe asked her face gaunt and pale, her body screaming out for someone to care for it, but Phoebe was best alone. When she was by herself, she was ok, she told her self, and trying so hard to convince her mind she was right. But she wasn't, and she knew that.

"No, look whether you like it or not I'm involved now, I can't... I can't just leave you to die," He said; and a tear welled in Phoebe's eye. Slowly it dropped, running down her face, leaving a streak through the dirt.

"I need to sleep," she said, lying down and clamping her eyes shut, knowing she wouldn't sleep, but desperate to avoid him, to avoid the confusing thoughts rushing through her mind. There she lay listening to the sounds of the hospital, the sounds of people, surrounded by noise and chaos.

Yet she had never felt so lonely.

***

"Morning!" Chandler walked into her room, smiling brightly, but his smile faded as his eyes darted around. She was gone.

"Excuse me," he called to a nurse. "Where did that girl go?"

"She left about 5 minutes ago," the nurse shrugged, turning back to her chart, and Chandler's heart skipped a beat. 5 minutes... he could still catch her.

***

She could hear him, calling her name, it was getting louder, and he was getting closer. But still she kept walking. Feeling dizzy and weak, but she kept walking. Finally she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Phoebe," he panted, "Please, let me help you?"

"I don't need help," Phoebe said, "I'm fine." Although even as the words escaped her dry lips, she sat down on the floor quickly, fearing her legs wouldn't hold her much longer.

"You're going back upstairs," Chandler said dominantly, helping her up.

"Please... please don't make me." Phoebe pleaded, her eyes filled with fear.

"Fine," Chandler submitted, but a nagging voice in the back of his mind told he couldn't leave her here."But... but come back to my apartment?"

The idea sounded crazy even as he said it, but he had to ask, seeing the horrified look on her face he tried to explain himself.

"You can just have some food or anything you want and then... and then I won't bother you again. I promise."

Phoebe didn't answer, going through his words over again. 'I won't bother you again, I promise.' But Phoebe wanted him to bother her again, she didn't want to say goodbye. Not again, not to someone else.

"Fine," she shrugged, as casually as she could, and he led her outside and hailed a cab.

***

"Hi Joe," Chandler said, as he led Phoebe inside. "This is Phoebe. Phoebe this is Joey my roommate."

Phoebe smiled shyly.

"You've been gone all night!" Joey exclaimed. "I was worried."

"Wait," Phoebe interrupted, something clicking, "When you left me at the hospital you didn't go home?"

"No, I went for a walk. I needed to think."

"All night?" Phoebe exclaimed, "That's a lot of thinking"

"What is with you and this walking thing dude? I don't get it," Joey said, patting him on the back as he walked past "But whatever," With that he walked out the door

"What did he mean?" Phoebe's asked suspiciously, "Whatever?"

"I don't... I mean..." Chandler stammered as he searched his brain for explanation for Joey, "I swear if he hasn't eaten in about 10 minutes, his brain is affected."

Phoebe laughed, in spite of herself. "He seems nice," she said, awkwardly sitting down.

"Yeah he is, they all are." Chandler smiled. Phoebe noticed his face light up as he thought of his friends and felt a twinge of jealousy flare up inside her, no matter how much she tried to ignore. Inside she craved for that kind of closeness.

***

Several hours had passed, and Phoebe had eaten a full meal and had a shower. She'd met Monica, but not Rachel or Ross.

She was starting to piece together their lives, she had faces for the names, the more she found out about these people, the stronger the feeling inside her stomach became, the feeling telling her that maybe... one day she could be a part of this, Chandler's face could light up as he thought of her. The two of them alone once more on Chandler's sofa, Chandler one again decided to probe the question of her background.

"So... how old are you?" he started gently, racked with nerves.

"26," Phoebe answered slowly, as if she knew what was coming

"So when did you start living on the streets?"

"Uh..." She paused, looking into his eyes, a sea of blue, of kindness and sincerity, "I was 13. My mum... died." She pulled out at the last moment, she couldn't tell him, he couldn't know the dark secrets of her childhood.

She was tainted, and she knew that. Like a cake, which a fly had landed on, the fly may have gone but the cake would never be the same. Neither would Phoebe.

Before she could help it she was crying again. She used to be so strong. Nothing could break her icy exterior, but years of cruelty and pain had slowly chipped away till there was nothing less, and Phoebe was exposed once again to face her life. Her reality.

Chandler raised his hand, wiping the tear away, wishing so badly that he could wipe away her sadness with it. He stared into her eyes, eyes which had seen more suffering than anyone should have, he didn't know what suffering but he could tell.

His face moved closer to hers, her gaze settling on his, and finally their lips touched, and Phoebe felt a rush run through her whole body. Just as the kiss started to get more passionate, Phoebe jerked backwards.

"I'm sorry – I... I just can't," she stuttered, before running from the apartment.

Chandler sat frozen, his heart wanting to go after her, but his mind thinking how she was always running away from him. Maybe he should give up? Phoebe had been hurt so badly, would she ever let him get close, to know who she really is?

Stuffing a cushion behind his head, he lay down on the couch, so many thoughts running through his head, but one stronger than all the others. He couldn't give up on her, not yet. Too many people had given up on Phoebe, and he refused to be one of them.

***

"She seemed ok, I guess," Joey shrugged, as Ross raised an eyebrow.

"What?" he asked, glancing up as Monica entered the coffeehouse.

"Nothing, what do you mean?" Joey said, trying to keep eye contact.

"There's something you're not telling us... Mon, did you meet this girl?" Rachel asked, turning her attentions to Monica.

"Phoebe? Yeah. I think she's homeless."

"Homeless?" Rachel gasped. "That's awful"

"Yep," Joey nodded.

"How did he meet her, though?" Ross wondered out loud.

"Long story." A voice came from behind them, and they turned to see Chandler there, he sat down gesturing to Gunther for a coffee.

"Care to share?" Ross asked.

"Yeah..." he sighed, "But I dunno where to start."

"The beginning?" Joey suggested innocently, and as the others broke out with laughter, a confused look shot across his face. "What?"

***

She peered in through the window, seeing their faces bright and cheerful, her hand clinging to the door handle, willing herself to turn it, to go in and sit with them but unable to bring herself to. He was talking now, the others listening intently, she wanted to listen but the window was there. The glass, that ever present invisible barrier, separating her from friendship, from love.

"You going in?" A gruff voice asked, and she snapped back to reality, to realise she was still paused at the door to the coffeehouse. Phoebe sighed, and with one last look at the 5 of them, she cemented her thoughts.

She could never be part of that world.

"Miss? You going in?" the man repeated.

"Uh... no."