Author's Note: *sniff* second to last chapters, folks. I have Spanish homework calling my name from inside my backpack…but for the time being I'm going to ignore it… FYI- remember, Brenda left with her father…Jack. So that's where she is to everyone who asked.
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The crew of the Black Pearl got out of Port Royal quicker than you could say 'shiver me timbers', with their captain at the wheel, looking happy enough. Brenda had fallen flat on her back once when the ship got out in the big waves, but luckily enough she was in her cabin where no one could see her. Jeez Sparrow, you haven't even been on land that long and you already forget to adjust your gait to the waves… she scolded herself. She sighed and got up. She looked at her bed, thinking it wasn't going to be like the one at the Johnson's. And even though her bed was bigger than everyone else's on the ship, she knew it wouldn't feel the same.
She had put the two pictures that Rebecca and Caitlin in a wooden, furnished box that she had gotten from her father some odd years ago, deciding against putting them on her desk. They would get lost too easily. She thought to herself, and if someone found them, I wouldn't want them to think me soft… she sighed; knowing reputation was everything to a Sparrow. She slid the box back underneath her bed, where she kept her silly little treasures and sighed.
She left her cabin and went up to her father, who still hadn't recovered his hat that was in his cabin, where he had left it so long ago. "Where are we off to, Captain?"
"Tortuga. I need to find some more crew members to replace Ana and Gibbs."
Brenda frowned, she hated Tortuga. She got hit on too many times to remember and hit too many men to count. Her right hook was better than anyone's on the ship, but she didn't really want to practice that on drunken men. She would rather practice on someone who deserved it. That reminded her, "How's that bruise?" she said, looking at her father's face.
He grimaced, "Fading fast…and yer lucky it is. I would've really gotten it if my crew knew you gave me a bruise."
She smirked, "It's not like it hasn't happened before…"
He stared at her, not finding that fact humorous, "Is there something you wanted?"
"Yea…to steer. I know you haven't been here in a while, but your cabin needs tendin' to, and the last time I tried cleaning up in there your eyes turned into the size of cocoanuts."
"How am I supposed to find anything if you move it?"
She rolled her eyes, "Dad, please. When yer done, I'll hand her back over to ye."
He paused, finally agreeing. There was a reason he didn't want to go to his cabin, there were memories in there he didn't want to remember. But sulking the whole way, he opened his cabin door and stood in the doorway before finally going in and shutting the door behind him.
He sighed, looking around. His bed looked the same. Messed up, looking exactly like the morning when he left. He looked at the little table next to the bed and found a half empty bottle of rum and a letter. He knew what letter that was. That was letter Gwyneth had written him when she left. He sighed and turned away. His rum closet was still the same, in the same place, mostly filled with bottles, on the side of the closet however, was his coat. Wind and weather worn. He sighed and walked over to it and took it from the hook that was on the closet. He put it on and it felt like he was getting closer and closer to the real him. He looked around for the missing piece. His hat.
He found it on his desk and went over and picked it up and slowly put it on his head, almost savoring the moment. He sighed, finally feeling himself again. He looked around his cabin again and went for the note on the table. He picked it up, read over it and almost ripped it in two, but decided not to at the last minute. He folded it back up and put it in the single drawer the table held. He sighed and thought, I gave her the choice…I shouldn't be mad… He looked around once again and then decided to go get his steering wheel back.
****
"Uhm Gwyneth…" Jonathan said, staring at his aunt who was staring out the window. It was night, the day after Brenda and Jack left, and she had tried to keep her mind off the Sparrows by playing cards with Jonathan. It wasn't working very well.
She snapped her head back, "What?"
"It's your move…"
"Oh…oh! Sorry." She played a card and picked up another one.
He smiled widely, "gin!" he said, laying down his cards. She looked and at them and frowned. She laid her cards down and he counted up the points. Then he frowned, "Gwyneth, you're not playing at your best…this offends me."
Mark snorted from his position at the boys' desk. She narrowed her eyes, looking at Mark, "What are you laughing at?"
"He's right…whenever you do decide to partake in cards, which is rare I remind you, you always beat one of us…if not all."
She raised an eyebrow, shrugging, "I have my head in other places, boys."
"We know." They said together.
She smiled, "Well at least I'm still talking to you boys…things could be worse than winning a card game, right?"
Trevor smiled from his spot on the bed, carving, "I guess."
She nodded, "Then it's settled. I'm sorry Jonathan, but you understand…right?"
He shrugged, "I suppose lost love is a matter of great concern, yes."
Gwyneth rolled her eyes, "You make it sound so technical."
"At least it's better than how Trevor describes it…" Mark said, and then quickly dodged the pillow that came flying in his direction from Trevor's bed.
"Quiet, fat head!"
"You almost smudged my paper!" Mark whined, examining his paper he was writing on.
"Actually Trevor, everyone technically has a 'fat head' as so kindly referred to it as." Jonathan responded. Gwyneth started laughing as Trevor threw a pillow at him too.
"Trevor, you suffer from lost love?" Gwyneth said, sitting in a nearby chair.
He glared at his two brothers and then at Gwyneth, "Only hypothetically."
Mark burst out into giggles at what Trevor had just said. Trevor threw another pillow at him, knocking him off his chair. Gwyneth raised her eyebrow, "Obviously I'm missing something here."
"Don't ask." Trevor muttered, going back to his carving. Gwyneth knew the feeling. She often wanted to throw a pillow at people who talked about her relationship with Jack, or lack thereof as the case may be. She sighed and sank further down into the chair, "Well boys, I love our time together at nights, but I think I may need another way to keep my mind off the Sparrows."
"Gwyneth?" Trevor asked, just before she left. She turned in the doorway, listening. "Did you really love him, like truly love him?"
She sighed, remembering what Jack had done to her heart, yet she still couldn't ignore her feelings. She nodded, "I did...and sadly enough, I still do."
****
"Get me some rum. Now." Jack ordered quietly as he sat down on a bar stool. It had been a long day. Jack and his first mate, Hanks were wondering the streets of Tortuga, looking for sailors who were more or less sober. Jack's head had been full of Gibbs and Ana Maria as he agreed to a man by the name of Dave Barnes. He had ten years of experience as a sailor and five years before that as a cabin boy. He looked about twenty. Jack figured he was raised on the sea. He'll make a good crewmen…and that's what you want. Jack's conscience told him. He just agreed, wanting to get this all over with. He could only be happy with two people, Ana and Gibbs.
There's no way I'm gettin' them back… he thought to himself. The barmaid set a mug of rum in front of Jack and he quickly drank it. "Slow down there mate, you might hurt yerself." Jack heard from behind him. That was no man. He set down the mug, wiped his face and turned. There was Ana Maria standing with a grin on her face. "I thought that was you, Jack."
He smiled and stuck out his hand. She shook it firmly and sat down next to him. "I 'eard you dropped off the face of the earth," she snapped, "jus' like that."
He smiled, "I did temporarily. Gibbs death hit me hard…"
"It hit all o' us hard, Jack. You know that."
He nodded. "I was with Rick for a while and then to Port Royal."
Ana paused, "Port Royal? Are you bloody kiddin' me? I thought you swore to yerself you wouldn't go back."
He shrugged, "I did. But things were a little off then…the Bean was there, anyhow. Got caught by the Commodore."
"Oh…he brand her?"
Jack nodded. Ana grimaced. Jack went on, "Aye. Well Beverly turned out to be married t'the Commodore…have like four children together…"
She smirked, "Never would've expected that."
He nodded, "And Gwen was there…along with Will and Lizzie with five kids…boy that was interestin'."
"You say Gwen was there?" She asked, looking at him. Jack nodded. She whistled, "That must've been interestin' as well."
"It was. We broke each others hearts." He said plainly and then took another drink out of his mug. Ana choked on the rum she was currently drinking and set the mug down on the counter, "You what?"
He sighed, "I did somethin' stupid…big surprise…she found out, broke my heart in the process of me breakin' her heart. It's all really simple."
"You blasted bloke! You went and fell in love!"
"Be quiet, would you? Don't want to ruin my reputation…" Jack said looking around, spotting many whores.
"I doubt you would even go with them after this…" she scoffed, "And it's not like anyone 'eard me."
"Yer right…I'm not in the mood for lovin' unless it's Gwen."
Ana Maria grimaced, "Look, did you talk to her? Apologize maybe?"
"She wouldn't listen to me. Said she didn't want to hear excuses…"
She smiled, "Women be wise…" she said taking another drink.
"Why the blast are you smilin'?" he asked.
She put down her mug, "My grandmother told me that when I was younger. It just reminded of what she said…okay? Gwyneth already started to guard her heart from you, so you won't hurt her again…but give it a couple of months…if she truly loved you, then she won't be able to hold it for this long."
"How can you be so sure?"
She sighed, "Because you took her heart when she still had feelin's for her other…Nathan I do believe…aye. You took her heart when she still believed she was in love with Nathan! Lizzie once told me that Gwyneth let people walk into her heart, sit down and drink tea and take her trust before anything else. She obviously let the wrong man into her heart."
****
The yearnings for a child of her own became more evident as the days went by. Brenda was the thing that filled the hole she didn't even know she had…until she was gone. A child-shaped hole was now left in her heart with no child to fill it.
Gwyneth didn't want Brenda to leave, that was obvious. And she now had grown a want in her heart for Jack as well, no matter how much it hurt to think about. Why do I want something I know will hurt me? She sighed. She had to find something to cure her yearnings and wants. What was there? She couldn't go to the Market and buy a child or a Captain Jack Sparrow. And yet, she put on her shawl and left her house, not sure where she was going to go.
She made the carriage stop when she yelled to Rick out the carriage window. He was coming down a plank. She walked quickly to him, who had noticed her and had stopped. "Ms. Johnson?" he asked when she reached him.
"Rick, do you know how I can get a hold of the Pearl?"
He stared at her for a minute before asking, "Why would you want to do that?"
She sighed, grabbing on to her hat as the wind picked up, "Rick, I need to talk to Jack and Brenda…"
"I thought…well to say it plainly, I thought you didn't want to see him again."
"What gave you that notion?"
"You didn't return his feelin's…"
She paused, "I what?"
"Jack told you he well…he loved you and you didn't return his feelin's…he wanted to call of the bet but you found out before I could agree."
Gwyneth felt like the world stopped turning, he was trying to call of the bet? He told Rick I didn't love him back? Why? "Rick, what did the bet entail?"
He cleared his throat, sure he could be hung for this. "If you said you loved him within a fortnight, he would get the fifteen pounds…but you didn't say it. So I got the money… he hasn't paid me yet, but he always pays his bets…well at least with me." He paused and then pulled out the piece of Jack had given him a week an a half ago. He showed it to her and Gwyneth almost fainted.
"You mean he told you I didn't love him and then lost fifteen pounds to you?"
Rick nodded, putting the paper back into his pocket, "He did. But I got to go, ma'am…" he said motioning to his ship. She nodded and he quickly left. She slowly walked to her carriage, making sure not to trip over her own feet. The carriage turned around and went towards the Turners, like she directed. Now more than ever she needed to talk to her old friends.
****
Brenda quietly knocked on her father's door and then opened it. She saw that he was at his desk, looking at maps and working with compasses. He had his spectacles that he had gotten a couple years ago. Brenda always liked it when he wore them, she thought it showed the true Jack, but of course showed nothing of the pirate captain. For that reason Jack only wore them in the privacy of his cabin.
"What is it Bean?"
She sighed, "I didn't want to leave." She said sternly.
He looked up, noticing the anger in her voice, "Are you mad at me for takin' you away?"
"No. I'm mad at both of you for acting so childish. If you had just apologized…"
"I did apologize!" He said, "Why does everyone keep bloody tellin' me that?! I DID!"
Obviously a touchy subject… she thought to herself, "Dad. Why didn't you push her? You push everyone!"
"'Cause she's more precious than everyone else."
"Okay…so doesn't she deserve the truth?"
"Yes…but she said she didn't-"
Brenda held up her hand, "You never referred to it as the truth…did you dad? And maybe if you had told her you didn't take the money…maybe that would've helped." She paused, "You didn't take the money, right?"
"No! I told Rick she didn't love me."
Brenda sighed and nodded, "Good. Now that doesn't mean you have to give him the money…You can spend it on a present for Gwyneth."
Jack smirked, "I don't think so. I always repay my debts to Rick."
"Not if we don't go to his house!"
Jack paused, "Why do you dislike him so much."
She sighed and sat on his bed, "it's not his fault he's a rat."
"Brenda…"
"I just saw him treat a woman with less respect and care than anyone should."
Jack nodded, he had seen the same thing in his time and even stopped him a few times. Jack sighed, "Well he's still my friend."
"Jack, it's obvious he doesn't hold women in the highest respect. He wanted to crush Gwyneth's heart, and that's exactly what he did, but got you too in the process." She smiled sourly, "He thought that the great bachelor that is Captain Jack Sparrow…that he couldn't be tamed."
"Tamed?" Jack repeated. "I've been tamed by no one!"
She rolled her eyes, knowing the truth, but maybe she could've put it a little differently. He sighed, "I got you something..." he said pointing to his pillow, "I was going to give it to you tomorrow, but now's good a time as any."
She eyed him and then took the medium-sized box from his pillow. "What's the occasion?" she asked before opening it.
He shrugged, "I just found it and thought of you…that's all…"
"Found it?"
He rolled his eyes, "I paid for it."
"That's a first," she muttered. She slowly opened it and stared at the thing that the box was holding. Her eyes slowly moved to her father, "Where did you get this?"
"Do you like it?" he asked, looking back at his maps.
"You answer my question first." She said, crossing her arms, "You sure as heck didn't get this in Tortuga…and if you did pay for this…why?"
"Okay, so maybe I didn't pay for it…but I tried paying for it."
Brenda narrowed her eyes, "Why."
He sighed, looking at her and leaning back in his chair, "It was obvious how attached you had gotten to Gwen…and just because I don't want to remember what had happened, doesn't mean you don't."
She sighed and looked at the thing in the box again. It was a little canvas that couldn't have been more than twenty inches in all. She rubbed the back of her neck, ten by seven at most...she thought to herself. The canvas had two faces on it, both looking in the same direction but not in the direction of the artist. It was Brenda and Gwyneth, both looking at something, both with faint smiles on their faces. The only color other than the black of the kohl was gray for Brenda's eyes, green for Gwyneth's eyes and golden yellow for Gwyneth's hair.
She sighed and looked back at Jack, "Who made it?"
"I asked Elizabeth to draw it for me a couple days before we left."
"I love it dad." She said simply.
He nodded, "Now get off to bed; we have a big day tomorrow."
"We do?"
He nodded again, but didn't supply any information. She smiled to herself and took the box with the picture in it when she left his cabin.
****
"I feel like a complete idiot." Gwyneth said plainly. She had gone over to the Tuners, who were both happy to see her as ever. They now sat in the parlor, tea in the women's hands and coffee in Will's.
Elizabeth or Will didn't respond to her comment but just exchanged a look. "Gwyneth…don't be so hard on yourself…" Will started out, "We've all made mistakes."
"Yes, but why do mine have to be so huge?" She said pitifully.
Elizabeth frowned, "You haven't made huge mistakes Gwyneth…"
She stared at her friend, "Do you remember when I pushed my brother into a fire? Sure, he doesn't have any scars, but that's a big mistake! And then what about going on the Pearl in the first place?! It got me into all sorts of trouble! And then there was refusing the Commodore. All together. He couldn't even get far enough to purpose when I dashed all his dreams…and then…then I let the man I love and have loved walk out my life without knowing the truth…If those aren't huge mistakes, then I don't know what are."
Will scratched his ear, "I think I remember when you pushed your brother into the fire…it was only a few years after I was rescued…I think was there in fact…it looked like you meant to do it…I don't think it was a mistake on your part."
Gwyneth frowned, seeing his point. "And as for going on the Pearl," he said, going on, "you only agreed because I was there, and you knew me."
She shrugged, "Maybe…"
"So you didn't know it was a mistake until way after it happened."
"Your point?"
"And with the Commodore…" Elizabeth said, "That wasn't a mistake either. If you married him- that would've been a pretty large mistake…because you wouldn't have loved him."
She bit her lip, afraid of what excuse they might come up with the next 'mistake'. Will sighed, "But letting Jack leave without an explanation…now that was a mistake."
She moaned and dropped her head in her hands. Elizabeth made a face at her husband and whacked him upside the arm. She told him quietly to 'shut up!' and let her do the talking. He shrugged, not listening, "Gwen, look, I've known you since I was a boy and I know that your intentions are always for the best…by not letting Jack stay or even explain, you were just protecting yourself, right?"
She lifted her head, "Yes…I didn't want him to hurt me again…"
Elizabeth smiled, "Well then you had the best intentions…but your better judgment was clouded by your emotions…not the best combination."
Gwyneth sighed, "It was really hard saying goodbye to him…"
Will nodded, "We know."
"I suppose you do…considering you're one of his good friends." She said to both of them. They nodded.
"But you get used to it…" Elizabeth said, "He's called by the sea…he can't ignore that. And unfortunately, the sea blows him in and out of each port, never letting him land anywhere."
Gwyneth sighed and sat back in her chair, "I think that's another reason why I pushed him away…I knew he wouldn't ever stay anywhere for any length of time."
"You were seriously considering…" Will left the sentence hanging, not sure what to say.
"Marriage?" Gwyneth filled in, "Yes. Only if he wanted it also."
He scratched the back of his head, knowing the answer to that. Gwyneth's caught the look he was giving. "Will Turner…"
"What?"
"Don't act innocent with me! I know you too well."
He sighed, "Jack might've mentioned…" he paused looking at his wife, "In the privacy of…each other's company…he might've implied that he would like a family…a mother for his daughter possibly."
Gwyneth's mouth dropped a little and she sighed, "I can't take this anymore…I love him, I really do, and I would love to be his wife…" she sighed again, "But I can't stand talking about this, knowing he's gone and not coming home…"
"We understand dear," Elizabeth answered. Shooting a look at Will and then looking at Gwyneth again, "So, your birthday is coming up…what would you like?"
She smiled, narrowing her eyes, "From Jack to my fortieth birthday…that's a good difference."
Elizabeth smiled back, "At least it's a subject change…And it's the big 4-0!"
She pointed a finger at her friend, "If you say over the hill, I will kill you."
"You know, I faintly remember someone crying when she was…thirty-two, I do believe…about turning forty…" Will said, a smile on his face.
Gwyneth blushed, covering her eyes with her hand, "That was so embarrassing…But now that it as come around…I'm not exactly excited about it."
"Well that doesn't mean you're getting old dear…just growing with beauty."
She rolled her eyes, "Elizabeth, say that again and you'll regret it."
Elizabeth smirked, "I can just feel the love from you dear, now cut to the chase, what do you want for your birthday?"
Jack Sparrow… "Lizzie, you know me, whatever you get me will be fine."
Elizabeth finally sighed, "If that's the way you want it…"
She nodded, "That's the way I want it."
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Author Thanks:
Emma436: Hey…I'm glad you read my chapter…not as long of a review as I would've liked, but I can't get everything I want. I understand completely about being busy. I hoped you liked this chapter as well.
Dawnie-7: Drama! I know…kinda reminds me of middle school…hmmm…but it's a little bit better than that. But yea, Gwyneth and Jack are confusing and just need to settle down together! Jeez! I'm glad you'll read the next one…*smiles*
Piper8188
ThePinkPanther: I totally agree! Emotional stuff is crappy.
Albe-Chan
Bitty-Buffy
