"What It Would Be Like" (chapter 2)
Series: Weiß Kreuz
By: Shukujo Kurai
Disclaimer: I do not own Weiss...x_X
Pairing: YxR/RxY
Rating: R
Warnings: OOC, shounen-ai, supernatural, child abuse, rape, etc...
Author's note: Think Steven King's 'The Dead Zone'...and think Aya as Johnny. ¬_¬; I know you've been wondering how Aya got these strange abilities...I've already got it figured out, but I'm not sure where I'll bring that in. ^.^;; Until next time, minna-sama.

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So what exactly WAS that? I ask myself as I lean against the doorway, crossing my arms as I watch my teammate closely.

Aya's been acting strange lately...well, stranger than usual, I mean. More...distant, yet so much more empathetic, if that makes any sense. It's like he's far away from the rest of us, maybe somewhere where he can feel everything around him.

Yep, it's official. I've finally lost it.

I shake my head and turn to the girl tugging on my sleeve.

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I let out a inaudible sigh of relief as I see Youji head back inside. Maybe he won't think anything of it. Maybe he'll forget about it. Maybe he just thinks that I'm losing my mind. That wouldn't be too far from the truth...

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After I finish helping the first girl, another comes up, then a group of them, then more join the sea of squealing fangirls. I feel sick.

A young foreign girl holds up a bunch of daisies, rare for our shop, and I can't help but to give in to the memories.

//"Youji, Youji!" A singsongy voice calls out as a beautiful woman with naturally curly orange hair steps into view. She's wearing a hunter green dress that fits her wonderfully with wooden sandals that don't even sink into the wet ground. She's small for her height...underweight. She presents me with a bouquet of daisies that she had just finished picking from the park where we're at.

A young boy with light brown hair, fair skin, and green eyes runs up to her. Me as a little kid...before...HIM. "Mama!" I squeal happily as she kneels down to hug me, her soft hair tickling my face.

"See these?" She asks, motioning to the daisies. "In America, they symbolize peace, love, and happiness." She always was a holdover hippie from the States.

I laugh softly as she tickles my nose with a daisy.

Foot steps come up from behind and I hear my mother arguing with the man she calls my father.
Though I'm still young, I can understand what's going on. She's fighting to protect me.

I duck behind a nearby bench, being too little to be of any assistance to my mother.

The shorter man fakes a punch to her face, moving instead to hit her in the stomach, making her double over. She gasps for air as she struggles to stand up.

He kicks her back down. He may be shorter, but she's malnourished while he's strong and stocky...believe me, I know. A few blows to the kidneys and head have her down and spitting blood.
Suddenly she grows still. "Mama!!" I yell, leaving the safety of my wooden shelter in order to see my mama one last time. I may have only been six, but I knew that she was about to die.

My father spots me, but doesn't pay much attention. He just walks away like nothing's happened.

"Yo...ji..." She manages to get out, making my attention revert back to her.

"Mama, don't die, please don't die!" Autumn leaves fall all around us, her blood turning the orange leaves a sinister red.

"...love...again..."

I blink back tears as the words leave her mouth, not making any sense to me whatsoever.

She stills once more, the little bit of sparkle that was left in her eyes is now gone.

I shriek in terror. She was the only person who ever protected me...and now she's gone.

Night comes and still no people walk to this side of the park. I think maybe it's destiny, forcing me to die slowly of hypothermia. It's what Mama would call November time and it starts to snow lightly.

I sniffle and cuddle closer to the rapidly cooling body of my beautiful mother.//

I shake my head and push my way through the swarm of girls. I've got to get out of here. I run past them, past Aya and straight to the bathroom where I immediately head to the toilet and start to throw up.

//"Youji?!" Someone yells, one coming from my right and one from above.

"Sarah?!" Same voices, same directions.

My head raises, my lips blue from the cold. "Help me!" I choke out hoarsely.

Everything moves faster, all the people around my mother and I, but in the background I see my father, rushing up toward me. "Youji! Thank goodness you're okay!" He lies easily. "What happened to your mama? Who did this?"

I just stare up at him. I know better than to tell the truth. I just look down at my mother's body.
"Mama..." I whisper as I wiggle out of my father's grasp to go pick up some of the daisies. "Sorry...mama..." I lay the flowers on her chest, gently moving one of her hands overtop them.//

"Youji?" A deep voice asks, sounding rather unconcerned...like HIM.

I don't reply, but instead go back to throwing up.

//"There you are, boy."

I keep hiding, shivering in absolute fear.

"Why are you trying to hide from your dear ol' dad?" I see a glimmer from behind his back. He's drunk again...drunk and deadly. "Come out and talk with me."

I inch backward.

"NOW!" The knife lashes out, slashing my back as I turn to run.

I scream softly, but continue scurring out of his path.

In a moment of swiftness, he tackles me to the ground. He growls as he rips at my shirt, touching me in every place possible. Seconds later, my shirt is across the room and he's fumbling with my pants. I try to shut all this out...think of better things, of my mother in her green dress with mountains of dasies. But my thoughts keep going back to what was happening.//

"Youji, I'm coming in."

Aya again. I can barely register his voice overtop of the booming voice of my father.

//He thrusts in and out brutally, his large fingers gripping my bony hips, bruising them. He yells strange things as he rapes me, sometimes it seems like he's talking to me, other times like he's yelling at my mother.//

I can hear Aya pounding against the door, but it later blends in with the grunting of my father.

//Another man comes in, taller than my father with more slender features. Once my father comes inside me, that man starts the cycle all over again. He calls me degrading names as he thrusts, ripping me apart.//

"Youji?!" Aya again. He sounds frantic, almost like he cares. Funny, how things turn out.

Finally, the door crashes open, pieces of wood flying out from where Aya forced the lock to come through the frame. I didn't realize that I had locked the door.

//Time has fastforwarded. The man, the one who calls himself Richard, the first one other than my father to rape me, is hitting me. He's angry that I didn't have the strength to swallow his semen that he ejaculated into my face. For some reason, he's shouting in a mixture of English and Japanese, telling me that I'm nothing but a worthless whore. After you hear something so many times, you can't help but start to believe it. He grabs a nearby bottle, an American whiskey bottle that's empty from his drinking, and knocks me over the head with it. It shatters, of course, shards of glass digging into my skin, ripping it open, blood gushes forth.//

I feel a hand on my shoulder. Aya.

I hear him scream softly, then fall to the floor near me.

//Richard hits me again with the broken bottle, this time across my back, eventually hitting the spot where my father had slashed me with the knife.//

I manage to shout Aya's name and break away from my vomiting. I grope around blindly, searching for whereever Aya landed. Did he trip over me or something?

Memories flood back into me so I don't have time to figure out why Aya fell.

//I'm lying in a pool of my own blood, naked and cold. I'm not cold for long...

A blinding light erupts from behind the bloody mattress. Fire. Shit...I'm going to burn again. Maybe this time I won't somehow make it out alive.

I'm not afraid, even as I watch the flames rise all around me. Actually, I'm wondering if I can even feel the heat. Odd, the things I think of when I'm about to die.//

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TBC...

o.O Well...that wasn't too disturbing, was it? Was it hard to follow? Be sure to let me know by either reviewing or emailing me.