What It Would Be Like -- Chapter 4
Series: Weiß Kreuz
Author: Shukujo Kurai
Rating: R
Pairings: A+Y/Y+A
Warnings: OOC, Shounen-ai, TWT, supernatural, child-abuse
Disclaimer: *holds up cardboard sign* I do not own Weiß Kreuz...obviously
Author's note: Think Steven King's 'The Dead Zone'...and think Aya as Johnny. ¬_¬;
Dedication: To MD-neechan, who has supported me throughout this and has taken an affectionate interest in this story. ~_^
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Arg...I really wish Aya'd stop ignoring me. I mean, I didn't do anything to him, so he has absolutely NO reason to be doing this to me.

*knock knock*

I sigh. If it's Omi again, I swear I'll scream.

Upon opening the door, I find a rather perturbed redhead shoving a brick at me.
"I believe this was for you."

As I look at him, I can see the little shards of glass in his bright red hair. "Aya, what happened?" I ask as my hand automatically moves to brush the shards out of his hair.

He flinches backward. "Just take your damn brick." He mutters gruffly.

Aya drops the brick into my hand and stalks off.

"Aya," I yell after him, "let me help you clean up."

He freezes. "I don't need your help."

For some reason, this irks me. "If this was for me," I say as I hold up the brick with a note tied to it, "then the least I can do is help you clean up the mess."

He seems to pause, perhaps reconsidering my offer. He simply snorts and walks off after a few seconds of silence.

I take this as a sign of his consent and follow him.

As I step into his room, I feel the unusual chill and I look up to see the gaping hole in the once pristine glass.

I decide not to say anything, but instead set about to finding a piece of wood or something to temporarily fix his window.

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He walked in and walked right back out, the bastard. Some help he was.

I find a broom and start to sweep up the tiny, sparkling shards. Odd, how something so luminous and beautiful could be so very dangerous and harmful. /Remind you of someone?/

I'm slightly startled as Youji slips silently back into the room, carrying pieces of a cardboard box from the shop and some duct tape.

Apparently I'm staring because he stares back at me with a curious look gracing his angular face.

"You gonna help me or what?" He asks, plopping the cardboard down near the window.

I act like I'm ignoring him and continue sweeping.

He sighs softly, slightly exasperated with my behavior. I can hear rustling the cardboard against the window, carefully positioning it to cover the hole.

I can't help but to watch him as he works. He's so perfect, so beautiful despite his past.

"It's not polite to stare, Ayan." He warns, a playful tone lining the potentially harsh words.

I snort softly and resume sweeping; I hadn't realized that I'd paused as he spoke.

After all my efforts to avoid him. I shake my head softly. I did nearly everything. I traded shifts with Ken and Omi, I made sure to be awake only when he was asleep, I took solo missions, visited Aya-chan, everything. But one lump of baked mud forces me to come into contact with him again.

Damn brick.

I didn't read the note; I didn't have to. It's from someone who either really hates Youji or really wants him, I'm not sure which. It was filled with bitter resentment yet lined with powerful lust. I didn't know what to make of it, really.

I look over at my calendar and curse under my breath. I guess I'll be late this month, Otousan...Okaasan.

Youji's watching me out of the corners of his eyes.

"What?" I ask curtly.

He simply shakes his head and goes back to trying to duct tape the window.

I dump the dustpan into a nearby trash can, the tiny tinkling sounds catching my ears, before moving to hold the cardboard in place for Youji.

"Thanks." He mumbles softly, yanking some duct tape off and tearing it with his teeth.

We're halfway through taping my window when the phone rings again.

"Arg!" Youji yells, playfully banging his head against the window frame.

I growl beneath my breath as I move to answer it. "Hn."

My eyes open widely before narrowing to angry slits. "Who are you?" I demand, my voice so low that it's barely audible.

They chuckle at my frustration.

"What the hell do you want?" I demand furiously.

"Your little boy-toy friend..." They say cryptically.

I look over at Youji, who's innocently duct taping my window.

I hear a tell-tale clicking on their side.

"Youji, get down!" I yell before tackling my teammate to the ground. I'm sucked into his mind as the sounds of gunshots fill the stagnant air around us.

I see Youji, frozen at the sight of a short, muscular man. He's yelling at Youji, something about payback for years in prison. Then I see myself, barely conscious, being pulled in front of said man who now brandishes a very large gun. Youji yells, begging for my life. The gun fires and now I see Youji crying over my corpse as a solemn paramedic zippers up the body bag. Grimly, I notice that Youji's covered in blood, probably mine. My head's nothing more than a gaping hole from the point blank gunshot, blood and gray matter pooling inside the bag.

The gunshots stop and Youji crawls out from under me. "What the hell?" He shouts as he runs to the window, his hand brushing against mine along the way.

Back in I go. Now I see Youji, full of bullets, struggling to speak to a nearly crying me.

I grab the enraged green-eyed man and yank him back down as another round hits the already-demolished window. He twists around to face me on the ground, a bewildered expression on his face.

This time I see the Koneko, sans one wall.

I know that I'm coping with the flashes better when I manage to pull out of it and yell to Youji even above the deafening sound of the gunfire.

"We've gotta get out of here!" I somehow manage to convey to my stupefied teammate.

He nods and yells something back that I can't quite make out.

The gunfire stops again and something comes crashing in.

Both Youji and I look over at the object, but Youji freaks out. "Bomb!" He yells, grabbing my hand, hauling me up, and getting me out of the room before I even realize that he had yelled 'bomb'.

Said bomb goes off, sending us flying into an open room, which so happens to be Youji's.

He scrambles about, grabbing a file folder from some hidden place. "Come on!" He shouts, grabbing my hand once again as we run out the door.

I stumble after him, my mind being overwhelmed by so many images that I don't have time to process them.

Ken and Omi meet us on the stairs.

"Get out of here, now!" Youji yells at them, grabbing Ken's arm and reaching for mine.

I pull away, just out of his grasp.

"We can't, Youji, all of our things are here...all of it..." Omi argues whiningly.

"They're just things, Omi, we can live without them!"

For some reason, Omi snaps. "How can you say that?! You don't know what it's like not to have those things!"

Memories from Youji's past come back, unbidden, into my mind, just as fresh as they were earlier this week when he first 'showed' me.

Ken touches my sleeve and I'm pulled into HIS mind. I see our shop, practically flattened, and I see the bodies of all four Weiß members.

"Aya, down!!" I hear Youji yell before a sharp pain flares up on my back.

"K'so..." I grumble spinning around to see my attacker and pulling the dart out at the same time.

The man chuckles from behind his Armani suit. "You shouldn't leave such fun toys lying around." He says smoothly as he pets Omi's crossbow.

Youji steps out in front of me and I can see the tension in his body, probably from being taken off guard. "You're not going to touch them, Rouhi." Youji warns the apparently familiar man, his voice amazingly steady. "I won't let you."

'Rouhi' chuckles at Youji's bravery. "Like you defended yourself....or Asuka?"

Youji's back goes ramrod straight, but something keeps him going. "I try to learn from my mistakes."
Automatically, he falls into a fighting stance, probably just out of habit.

The man scowls. "You can't learn, you miserable fuck! You never even went to primary school."

Even from my angle, I can see that Youji has paled to a deadly shade of white. "But I AM street-smart." He pauses, taking a well-earned breath. "I learned from the best."

Rouhi smiles as he shoulders the crossbow. "So you've finally accepted that, eh?" He stops to ponder something. "How about this: you come with me willingly and your friends can live to see another day?"

"Where's the fun in that, Rouhi?" A rough American voice asks. "I say we do what we used to do, just for old times' sake." The man from Youji's memories steps out from the partially demolished door. "How about it, whore?"

Omi pipes up at the most inopportune time. "What are they talking about, Youji?"

Youji's green eyes never leave the two men at the top of the stairs. "Nevermind that. You two get him out of here." He orders, pointing to me without turning around.

"Aw, you haven't told them your little secret?" The American asks in a blatantly condescending manner.

"Your friend was a rapist-whore, did you know that?" The shorter man asks as he pushes his sunglasses back up on his face.

Omi and Ken go silent. "Youji...." One of them whispers. "Is that true?"

"Yep, he was the best cock-sucker around." The foreigner tells us, regaling in what appear to be fond memories for him.

I search Youji's face for answers, but instead find nothing. He doesn't seem embarrassed by this admission at all. I can't help but to wonder if he's proud of it or something equally as revolting. "...You three get the hell out of here and don't come back."

The drug that was in the dart makes me sway and as I get closer to Youji, perhaps even brushing against him, I can hear his thoughts, unconsciously projected by the immense amount of emotions trapped inside his lanky frame. |Because I'll be dead...hopefully along with those two.| I stagger as I force my body to straighten up and look intimidating. "I'm not leaving, Youji."

He breaks eye contact with the American to stare at me with his huge green eyes.

"...Whatever happened to you...whatever you once were...None of that matters." My vision starts to swirl. "...I refuse to leave you here."

"How sweet...well, we can always use two whores, right Rouhi?"

"You're not going to use him!" Youji screams, his voice cracking in the midst of it all. "I won't let you use him like you did me!" He turns back to me, even though I can't really focus on his face right now. "They'll just use you against me, now get out of here...please...?"

The shorter one sighs. "You can stop trying to protect their names, boy, we already know them." He points at Omi. "Tsukiyono Omi, son of my ol' buddy Reiji;" His finger moves over to Ken, "Hidaka Ken, ex-famous soccer-player;" He finally points at me, "and Fujimiya Ran, renound swordsman and former waiter." He seems bored by all this, rightfully so.

I snarl at him for good measure. If he's a friend of Takatori's, then he's automatically beneath scum in my eyes.

"Oh, I forgot your little resentment of Reiji." He muses. "How IS little Aya-chan these days? Doing better, I hope."

I snap, lunging up the stairs only to be held back by Youji. I'm only further annoyed by the impending visions. I see the shorter man with an unconscious version of me in his short, stubby arms. Youji's chasing after us while the American uses him for target practice. As Youji finally falls, he screams my name and it reverberates through my head. /AYA!!!/

"Aya, stop it. He's just trying to piss you off enough to where you'll come up there, they'll have a net waiting and they'll launch it and you'll be caught and put through the same shit I was and I don't want that to happen to you, Aya, so please PLEASE stop..." He blurts out all in one breath.

I regain my bearings and stare into Youji's pleading emerald eyes. If only he knew just how beautiful and strong he is inside...

Youji... 'please don't die on me...' The thought crosses my mind, completely unbidden, not even sure if I managed to say anything at all.

The two men are saying something, so I turn to look at them only to be met with the glassy eyes of two large beasts. The short man's somehow transformed into a strong black bull and the American's now a lion.

I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to banish the obvious hallucinations. Gods, THIS is why I never let Kritiker drug me...

The lion lets out a roar, deafening to my now overly-sensitive ears.

I see a young Youji, happily running through a field of daisies. Instinctively, I follow him, trying to catch up. Suddenly it registers that the boy's eyes are always covered in a veil of shadows. The boy turns toward me, an absolutely wicked smirk on his face and something clenched in his hands.
Garroting wire.

"Youji?" I ask as the boy approaches me. He stops about a meter away from me and suddenly brightens, presenting me with a daisy, the wire nowhere to be found. Bewildered by this, I automatically move to accept it only to have the boy suddenly behind me, the sharp wire at my throat.

"Youji, stop!" I manage to yell before the wire closes completely around my neck. My hands instinctively claw at it, primal instinct taking over.

My vision wobbles and little glittering dots float around. Darkness follows the shiny specks, slowly creeping in from all sides.

I continue fighting my losing battle against the wire.

Before I know it, the darkness has enveloped my entire vision and I'm left with nothing but the bleak memories of what had just transpired.

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TBC....

Kurai: Well that was....
MD: DUDE, that's SCARY stuff
Kurai: o.o Um...yeah, well, now I'm at a roadblock....u_u;;;