Thanks to everyone for reviewing!! Sorry about the slow updates! More Young Link in this, I think, especially near the end…
Chapter 2
Digital Cameras and More Cows
~One Hour after Last Chapter~
Young Link: I saw cows, not cows!!
Link: Well, I saw COWS!!!
DMG: Guess what?
Young Link and Link: What?
DMG: Those weren't cows.
Young Link: Wha-? They had to be cows!
DMG: Well…they weren't.
Link: Then what were they?
DMG: *dramatic pause* Cows.
Zelda: *falls over*
DMG: Anyways, shouldn't we be getting on with this little "Get Rid of Ganondorf" mission?
Zelda: Yes…of course…
Young Link: *waves WindWaker* *brings them to…the WindWaker dimension!!!*
DMG: Hey, do you have the Deluxe Picto-Box?
Young Link: Yup!
DMG: *whisper. whisper* Can I borrow it?
Young Link: Sure. *gives Deluxe Picto-Box to DMG*
DMG: YESSSSS!!! *jumps into the air* Okay…let's go find Ganondorf!
Link: Do we have to?
Zelda: Yes, we do. First stop…Earth Temple. (A/N: I'm not quite so sure about the Earth part. Maybe it was Forest. But I haven't played WW in a while so I can't remember….)
Saria: Earth Temple? Cool! Sounds sort of like the Forest Temple!
Link: Is it scary?
DMG: Yeah.
Link: How scary?
DMG: Well, how scary do you think Floor Masters and ReDead and Stalfos and Beamos are? And falling coffins and poes and…MEDLI? (A/N: I think she's sort of ugly. But I don't hate her.)
Link: *twitch*
DMG: ^_^ *gets camera ready*
Link: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *starts running around in circles screaming his head off*
DMG: *click* *click* Anyone got a laptop? I need to start putting these up for auction…
Zelda: AHEM! Let's go!
~They board the King of Red Lions~
DMG: AHHH! ABANDON SHIP! IT'S SINKING!
Link: Well, it's OBVIOUS that it's because you're waaaay too fat!
DMG: Careful, or I might just set Epona on you…
Link: *screams* *jumps off the ship* AAHHH! DROWNING! DROWNING! YOU STUPID SHIP! GET BACK HERE!!
DMG: *click* *click* AHH! I FORGOT ABOUT THE STUPID PICTO-BOX'S THREE PICTURE LIMIT!!!!!!!!
Young Link: -_-;;
Link: Yes! She ran out of film!
DMG: Thankfully, I have my little digital camera here with me today…^_^
Link: X.X
Young Link: Can I have my Picto-Box back yet?
DMG: Sorry, but no…I have to sell these on eBay first.
Link: @.@ There goes my reputation…down the drain…
*sound of toilet flushing*
Zelda: Anyways, we're here. I sense something wrong with Medli.
DMG: Maybe she got sick. *falsely uncheerful voice*
Zelda: No…not physically. More like spiritually.
DMG: Maybe she died spiritually.
Zelda: No…not spiritually.
DMG: Maybe she died. LITERALLY.
Navi: Looks like I've met someone who beats me in annoyingness.
DMG: Does that mean she died literally?
Zelda: -_-;; No.
DMG: What about metaphorically? Not as good as literally, but still…
Zelda: . NO!
DMG: Figuratively?
Zelda: *has steam coming out of her ears*
DMG: That's it. She died. End of story.
Zelda: ARGH!!
DMG: *click* *click*
Zelda: IF YOU TAKE ANY MORE PICTURES I'LL HAVE TO HAVE THAT STUPID THING CONFISCATED! WHATEVER IT IS!!
DMG: *sulks* Fine then. Hey Link, I see a ReDead…
Link: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Young Link: Sheesh. How dense can you be? There wouldn't be a ReDead floating around in an ocean…
*At that precise moment, a ReDead floats by singing its horrible paralyzing song*
Everyone: *paralyzed*
DMG: *finger keeps pressing the button so she is taking pictures of the floating ReDead*
Everyone: *now unparalyzed*
DMG: OMG! How many pictures did I take of Link's face? How much film did I waste exactly?
Saria: DMG, that was the ReDead…
DMG: o.0;; I thought it was Link's face. (A/N: Actually, I think Link is sorta cute. But it was funny.)
Link: Hey! I'm not that ugly!
*mirrors shatter*
Link: *raises eyebrow*
DMG: -_-;; Sorry…couldn't resist the sound effects…
Zelda: ANYWAYS…into the temple we go…
DMG: Uhh…can we think this over?
Zelda: Nope. We have to go see Medli.
DMG: But I have almighty authoress powers! AND I have an atomic bomb! WHICH I STILL HAVE NOT USED!
Zelda: Okay Link…pick up the big heavy rock that just so happens to be shaped like a Stalfos…the one that is moving and has a big pointy weapon in its hand…
Young Link: Are you out of your mind?
Link: Stalfos? Where?!?!?!? *running around screaming*
DMG: *click* *click*
*bomb flies over from nowhere and sets the Stalfos-shaped rock on fire*
Everyone: Wha-?
Tetra: Hi everyone!!!
DMG: I wonder if she spooks easily…hey look, Tetra! There's a Stalfos behind you!
Tetra: Uh, no, whoever you are…there's one behind YOU…
DMG: O.O;; EH? *turns around* *sees huge looming Stalfos behind her* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *runs away*
Young Link: I wish I had my Picto-Box. Then we could have gotten revenge. *evil face* Okay, I'm normal now…*scary face* BWAHAHAHAHA! *returns to normal* Why are you guys all staring?
Saria: You're PMS-ing. And I never thought it was possible for a guy to PMS.
Young Link: ….!! *pulls out LARGE hammer*
Everyone: EEP!
Young Link: ^.^
DMG: How do I kill a Stalfos? How do I kill a Stalfos? *panic attack* *whips out digital camera* AHA!!!!!!!!!!!! *click* *click* *click*
Stalfos: *blink* *blink blink*
Link: O.O;; She's lost it.
Young Link: Yeah…
Tetra: Hey Link, who's she? *points at DMG* She certainly seems a bit strange.
Young Link: A photographer. Of embarassing scenes.
Tetra: Interesting.
Link: .
Zelda: Believe me…it's not interesting.
Young Link: Yeah, she plans to sell them on this place called eBay for money.
Tetra: …sounds…profitable…
Everyone: .
~Eventually, they manage to kill the Stalfos.~
Zelda: Okay…everyone inside now…
~They have been walking for a while now, when all of a sudden a big huge Floor Master comes out of the floor and tries to eat them alive!~
*loud gasps*
Young Link: *giving DMG funny looks* That's not really that funny…
Link: YOU BET IT'S NOT! *running back and forth across the room trying to escape the angry Floor Master*
Young Link: …I didn't mean that…I meant the sound effects.
Saria: What sound effects?
Young Link: I'm hearing things! *takes out earplugs*
Harry Potter: *randomly pops up* Hearing voices isn't a good thing, even in the wizarding world.
Young Link: Well, it's not the wizarding world, and they're not voices! THEY'RE SOUND EFFECTS!
Harry Potter: …oh. *vanishes*
Zelda: What sound effects are you talking about?
DMG: ARE YOU DEAF!?!?! *turns up the speakerphones to full volume* *screams through loudspeakers* CAN – YOU – HEAR – ME – NOW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
*Link screams. LOUDLY.*
Link: HELP!!!!!
Floor Master: Nyuk nyuk nyuk! Nwahahaha! I have this….green person here! Bwahaha! One move and he goes somewhere else!
Link: O.O You called me a green person?
Floor Master: Yup yup.
DMG: This Floor Master is embarassing.
Floor Master: Yup yup.
DMG: O.O
Link: You called me GREEN!?!?!
Young Link: Well, you are green…
Link: Look who's talking, green boy!
Young Link: I'm green? I always thought I was purple…or blue…or red. Yeah, I think that was it…
Everyone: …-_-
DMG: *frantically takes out WW guidebook* HOW DO I BEAT THIS *censored* *censored* THING!?!?!?! *sees Stalfos emerge from shadows* OH DOUBLE *censored*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Young Link: Uhh…*whips out sword and bombs*
DMG: GAHH! OH SCREW THIS! *throws guidebook in Stalfos's mouth* Here. Eat. Now.
Stalfos: @_@ _;; EWW! *dies*
DMG: …Eww…Stalfos slobber…*wipes hands on Link's tunic*
Link: -_- I need a change of clothes…
Arren [friend that has a guidebook]: O_O DMG! YOU KILLED MY GUIDEBOOK!!!
DMG: Oh…s-*censored*
Tetra: Err…someone pressed the button too late…
DMG: GET THE FU-*censored* AWAY FROM ME! *runs, screaming bloody murder, out of the room* I'LL BUY YOU A NEW ONE! JUST STOP CHASING ME!
Arren: *growls* *eyes glow red*
DMG: Oh for the love of….O________________O
Young Link: *pokes DMG* Uh, we've got a problem…
Link: *mouth falls open*
DMG: I've got problems too…we've all got problems…the world has problems…we might as well stick it in a microwave…
Everyone: Uhh…
DMG: ^^;; Never mind…
Link: *mouth falls open about another six inches*
Young Link: *pokes repeatedly* I SAID WE HAVE A PROBLEM!!!
DMG: *smashes pot on Arren's head* I said not now!
Young Link: I SAY WE HAVE A PROBLEM!!!
DMG: WELL, I SAY NOT NOW!
Arren: @____@ My head…*falls over…onto other Floor Master*
Link: Um, my Floor Master is licking me…
DMG: O__________O I could have gone my whole life without knowing that *faints dead away*
Arren: HELLLLLP! IT'S EATING ME!
Link: HELP ME! HE'S LICKING ME!
Young Link: O____O;;
Zelda: *zaps Floor Master that's holding Arren*
Tetra: *stabs Link's Floor Master, eyes glow red* DON'T TOUCH MY LINKY-POO!
DMG: What the *censored*???? -_- This *censored* censoring is getting annoying…yo, technical dude! FIX THE CENSORING!!
~Behind the Scenes~
Technical Dude: Kyahahahaha…*programs weird virus into program* That's for not paying me a salary! I'm outta here! *runs*
DMG: BUT I DO PAY YOU A SALARY! YOU JUST LOSE IT ALL THE TIME!
Technical Dude: *pauses* Oh well. Then I get to see you lose your mind. *buys popcorn and sits in first row*
DMG: -_- *boots Technical Dude's *censored* out of the so-called 'theatre'* Screw you.
~Back in the Earth Temple~
Arren: o_O Did Tetra just call Link "Linky-poo"????
Tetra: Linky-winky!!
Zelda: Why I never!!
Arren: *faints*
Young Link: *snicker*
Link: Hey, don't laugh. You're going to turn out like this in the end too.
Young Link: But I'm 2-D! You can't…er…
DMG: *comes back from kicking personnel's butts* Don't finish that. I mean, look at Paper Mario. He was *bomb*ing made out of paper…and he still got with Princess Peach, who was also *flute*ing made out of paper…how the *surfboard* can someone like someone who goes around doing ballet as a form of acceleration all day?
Saria: …Is it just me, or did you just say bombing and fluting and surfboard?
DMG: Uhh…
Everyone: *looks at each other*
DMG: *swears so much that everyone covers their ears* I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE DONE WORSE THAN KICK THAT GUY'S ARSE FROM HERE TO PLUTO AND BACK!
Arren: That's pretty harsh already…
DMG: DO I LOOK LIKE THE TYPE TO CARE?
Arren: …Point.
Young Link: She is a baaaad influence…we should kick her out of this adventure.
DMG: *fumes* If you do that, I'll make you "accidentally" fall into a lake full of piranahs and let them eat you…
Link: I wonder if the inside of piranahs also look like cows?
Zelda: Now that I think about it, Jabu-Jabu might just be a piranah. We don't know this for certain…
Young Link: They're cows, not cows.
Link: No, they're COWS!!!!!
DMG: NOOOO! THEY STARTED AGAIN!!!
Young Link: COWS!
Link: No, COWS!
Young Link: COWS!!!
Link: COWS!!
Everyone: _;;
DMG: HOW CAN THIS DAY STILL BE GOING ON????? IT'S BEEN LIKE 74 HOURS!!!
Everyone: _;;
DMG: *sighs* This is…going to STAY a very long day…
[Notes]: Wow. I updated.
Arren is real, and yes, that's where I get my WW-ness from. I didn't do much temple development because I haven't played WW for forever. I need to steal their guide…but he's a girl! XDD
