SITN20
"Yes. No. I don't know." Dylan examined the broken hilt in his hand, rather than look at Beka.
"Well, I'm glad we got that cleared up." Beka's voice had that mock- chipper tone it only possessed when she was at her most sarcastic.
"I realize it stretches the bounds of probability, but Tyr could have managed it. Before you go defending him again, please remember that I served with Rhade for a long time. I never had so much as an inkling of the betrayal coming. Well, not until he started shooting anyway." Dylan laughed depreciatingly at himself.
"So, you're still punishing yourself for not seeing through Rhade's deception by refusing to trust Tyr." Beka crossed her arms in front of her.
"It's not that simple, Beka. I start thinking of him as a friend, and then I remember what I'm doing. I'm trying to rebuild a Commonwealth that fell because Nietzscheans attacked it from within. Rhade's betrayal was deeply personal and painful, but it isn't the only reason I am wary of placing too much trust in Tyr." Dylan pointed out, feeling vindicated.
"That's a load of crap. Harper has better reasons than you to hate all Nietzscheans, but he trusts Tyr." Beka raised an eyebrow, wondering how Dylan was going to react. She'd never pushed him this hard about Tyr before.
"Harper is an engineer, he will never have to make command decisions where he will have to rely on Tyr. He can afford to misplace his trust." Dylan
"Hello, Beka to Dylan, Tyr died for Harper on Machen Alpha. I seriously doubt his trust has been misplaced. You need to take a long hard look at why you treat Tyr the way you do. I don't care if you tell me what you discover or not, but you should do it before you drive a wedge between the two of you that cannot be removed." Beka grabbed her drink, slid off the barstool, and pushed into the crowd.
Dylan watched her go, then turned back to his drink. Had he been overreacting? Beka was right about one thing; Tyr had died for Harper. That was hardly the 'survival first' behavior of your typical Nietzschean. Perhaps he had been judging Tyr more harshly than he deserved.
It was hard to separate his feelings for Tyr from his feelings for Rhade. In that respect both Tyr and Beka had been right. He genuinely liked Tyr, which was why he worked so hard to maintain a distance between them. Being best friends with a Nietzschean simply meant they didn't have very far to reach when they plunged the knife in your heart.
Dylan froze with his drink halfway to his lips. Is that what Beka meant? He hadn't really dealt with how he felt about Rhade's betrayal; he'd just thrown himself into action to avoid thinking about everything he'd lost. Then, when something happened to remind him, like his occasional camaraderie with Tyr, he did his best to make sure the situation didn't happen again. That way, he didn't have to deal with it. It was much easier to rebuild the Commonwealth than examine his feelings.
Maybe, just maybe, he owed Tyr an apology. He downed the remainder of his drink and headed toward the exit.
"Yes. No. I don't know." Dylan examined the broken hilt in his hand, rather than look at Beka.
"Well, I'm glad we got that cleared up." Beka's voice had that mock- chipper tone it only possessed when she was at her most sarcastic.
"I realize it stretches the bounds of probability, but Tyr could have managed it. Before you go defending him again, please remember that I served with Rhade for a long time. I never had so much as an inkling of the betrayal coming. Well, not until he started shooting anyway." Dylan laughed depreciatingly at himself.
"So, you're still punishing yourself for not seeing through Rhade's deception by refusing to trust Tyr." Beka crossed her arms in front of her.
"It's not that simple, Beka. I start thinking of him as a friend, and then I remember what I'm doing. I'm trying to rebuild a Commonwealth that fell because Nietzscheans attacked it from within. Rhade's betrayal was deeply personal and painful, but it isn't the only reason I am wary of placing too much trust in Tyr." Dylan pointed out, feeling vindicated.
"That's a load of crap. Harper has better reasons than you to hate all Nietzscheans, but he trusts Tyr." Beka raised an eyebrow, wondering how Dylan was going to react. She'd never pushed him this hard about Tyr before.
"Harper is an engineer, he will never have to make command decisions where he will have to rely on Tyr. He can afford to misplace his trust." Dylan
"Hello, Beka to Dylan, Tyr died for Harper on Machen Alpha. I seriously doubt his trust has been misplaced. You need to take a long hard look at why you treat Tyr the way you do. I don't care if you tell me what you discover or not, but you should do it before you drive a wedge between the two of you that cannot be removed." Beka grabbed her drink, slid off the barstool, and pushed into the crowd.
Dylan watched her go, then turned back to his drink. Had he been overreacting? Beka was right about one thing; Tyr had died for Harper. That was hardly the 'survival first' behavior of your typical Nietzschean. Perhaps he had been judging Tyr more harshly than he deserved.
It was hard to separate his feelings for Tyr from his feelings for Rhade. In that respect both Tyr and Beka had been right. He genuinely liked Tyr, which was why he worked so hard to maintain a distance between them. Being best friends with a Nietzschean simply meant they didn't have very far to reach when they plunged the knife in your heart.
Dylan froze with his drink halfway to his lips. Is that what Beka meant? He hadn't really dealt with how he felt about Rhade's betrayal; he'd just thrown himself into action to avoid thinking about everything he'd lost. Then, when something happened to remind him, like his occasional camaraderie with Tyr, he did his best to make sure the situation didn't happen again. That way, he didn't have to deal with it. It was much easier to rebuild the Commonwealth than examine his feelings.
Maybe, just maybe, he owed Tyr an apology. He downed the remainder of his drink and headed toward the exit.
