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Title: The Prisoner of Azkaban

Chapter: Anxiety

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Seven years had passed since Sirius was sent to Azkaban and James and Lily had died, and Sirius didn't even realize it.

There were many things he didn't realize. Like that people were almost erasing him from their minds. Or, Remus Lupin was going through his transformations alone again.

Harry was at least eight now. Wow, in three years he'd get his letter to Hogwarts. Sirius wondered if the boy looked like James. Or liked pranks. Or thought badly of his aunt and uncle. Sirius had hoped for all three. Hmm…if he could, Sirius would get Harry, let's see, probably a broom. A newer style, like a Nimbus. Maybe not a Nimbus, Sirius didn't know that brand too well. 

He wondered what Moony was doing right now. Probably pondering why Sirius did what he did. Figures.

If Sirius wasn't in Azkaban right now, and James and Lily hadn't died, and Peter wasn't a spy, and Remus wasn't either, he'd probably be snogging with some blonde, blue eyed beauty in his small apartment. She'd be beauty and brains, and have a great job at the ministry where she'd run against Fudge for Minister of Magic.

But that just wouldn't happen. No. Nothing good would happen, it just wasn't possible. Nope. Harry would grow up thinking his godfather was a murderer. Nah. He probably wouldn't even know he had a godfather. Well that sucks.

Sirius remembered when he was first brought to Azkaban. He was only twenty. His old mentor, Alastor Moody and a couple of other close Aurors had brought him in. It was horrible. Being placed in the highest security cell.

Sirius shivered. He hated it in here. Most likely because he was in here for so long and the dementors and the cold.

Sirius wrapped his arms around his knees.

"James and Lily, Sirius, how could you?"

"SHUT UP!" Sirius silently told the traitor. "Shut up and leave me alone!"

A horrible smirk on the rat's face.

Calm Sirius. If you keep this up you'll go mad, Sirius thought. Yeah, well, I'm already mad at Pettigrew! the nasty part of his head said.

Shhh, go back to thinking what everyone is doing right now, besides Pettigrew.

Okay, he could do that. But he couldn't do that. His Gryffindor courage was failing miserably. It was if had none left. His family was made of dark wizards. But that didn't make him like them.

Maybe he deserved to be in Azkaban. He had led his two best friends to death, and their son an orphan. No, he couldn't think like that. He'd start believing it was the truth.

But maybe he had been doing something wrong and didn't realize it. Like maybe he had slipped something to Voldemort about the Potters. Maybe he had told the Dark Lord to go to Pettigrew for the Potters' location. Maybe he had killed those twelve muggles and thought it was Pettigrew.

Sirius! God damned it! No! Do not allow yourself to think like that! You'll start thinking you actually did it! The sane part of Sirius' mind told him seriously.

He sighed. If he ever escaped (he had changed his mind) he would find Pettigrew and break every bone in his worthless body. Yes, it was worthless. Vermin, that's what Pettigrew was.

Sirius, using the clever mind he had, started thinking of things to do to Wormtail.

Yes, it was one way to keep his mind off of everything else. But it stopped when the voice of the rat came and accused him of killing his best friends.

He loved James and Lily and Harry like they were his own family. Sirius had taught Harry new words, like Padfoot, Prongs, Moony, Wormtail, Dickhead, and other pleasant words.

James had gotten particularly angry when Harry had called Sirius "Daddy". It resulted in a pink flying motorcycle with muggle nursery songs instead of the roaring of a usual motorcycle.

How James had thought that the pink bike would change Harry's vocabulary meanings, Sirius did not know. He had, of course told James this, but it only resulted with a black and blue eye and a cracked lip.

"See Harry?" Lily Potter said to her son. "This is why you want to follow mine and Moony's example," she had said when James had taken a blow at Sirius's head.

"Moo'y!" Harry replied excitedly. After Sirius had left James approached his family.

"Who invited him here in the first place?" he asked. Lily shrugged.

"I don't know. We fed him one day and he keeps on coming back," she replied.

Sirius smiled. It had to be the first time he had ever smiled in Azkaban, truly. But that didn't seem right. Why hadn't the dementors sucked it out yet? Not that that was bad, it was just a little eerie.

What are you talking about? A little eerie in Azkaban? The whole fortress is eerie, Sirius thought. He sighed. It was so lonely in Azkaban. No one to talk to. Maybe he could make up an imaginary friend. Sirius snorted. Making up a friend in Azkaban was something you just didn't do. He didn't want to seem crazy. Or stupid. But he often thought he was a combination of the two.

Yup, this was it. Stuck with only his thoughts. Oh, it was depressing. The highlight of his day was food. Rather disgusting food at that. But complaining would get him nowhere.

Sirius rested his head against the wall.

It would be another long five years until he would escape. But, nonetheless, he would escape.

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Two chapters in two days, Hurray! Please review.