Just so everyone knows I'm doing my best writing this parody without a
script...I'm trying to remember the movie best I can...so don't hate me if some
things are out of order =)
A note from Chico: I don't look very good as a crested, I'm sorry to say, so I've decided I would rather be a mongrel than a Chinese Crested. YAY.
-Chapter 2-
[Mort sits at his computer reading all he has written]
Mort: man...I just can't write today... [deletes everything]
Chico: or maybe...you're ...SCARED!
Fangirls: DARE HE SAY IT? MORT RAINEY/JOHNNY IS ...SCARED??? [gasps fill the air]
Mort: Since when can you talk?
Chico: Since I'm about to be killed. [grins and sticks out tounge]
Housekeeper: I CANT GET NO...SATISFACTION! [dances with vaccum]
Mort: Get her Chico! Go on...get HER!
Chico: [ignores Mort]
Mort: dogs are useless. [walks downstairs and retrieves mountain dew]
Manuscript: I have now made my comeback. MUHA.
Mort: [sees manuscript] crap.
Housekeeper: Mr. Rainey, I found a story in the trash and even though it clearly stated that it was by a John Shooter, I took it out and assumed it was yours.
Mort: ....thanks
[Housekeeper leaves to go clean some more. Mort takes out book containing Secret Window and compares Shooter's story to his]
Shooter's story: blah blah woman blah love blah blah all you had blah he intended to kill her blah blah knew where to bury her blah blah garden blah blah...
Mort's story: blah blah woman blah love blah blah all you had blah he intended to kill her blah blah knew where to bury her blah blah garden blah blah...
Mort: Why didn't I know this was coming? Now to summon the housekeeper. SHIT! [spills mountain dew all over table]
Housekeeper: cleaning...senses...getting..sharper...SPILL IN KITCHEN. MUST CLEAN NOW!
[housekeeper runs to clean up mess while Mort runs upstairs to smoke]
-next day-
Mort: hmm...I'm all alone in a remote cabin on a strange lake. I think I'll unplug the phone.
-later-
[Mort sitting at table eating sandwhich and drinking mountain dew]
Mort: I just want to sleep. [lies down on floor] I sleep more than any other human being I have ever heard of.
Chico: [eats Morts sandwich] amen [prances away]
Mort: Chico-o-o-o-o don't be dico-o-o-u-u-r-a-a-aged.
Chico: Morty-y-y-y fork o-o-o-o-off
Mort: I'LL KILL YOU TOO!
-authorette comments-
thanks be to kaci for introducing me to the phrase fork off. I swear I shall never use it again throughout my parody because it belongs to her.
A note from Chico: I don't look very good as a crested, I'm sorry to say, so I've decided I would rather be a mongrel than a Chinese Crested. YAY.
-Chapter 2-
[Mort sits at his computer reading all he has written]
Mort: man...I just can't write today... [deletes everything]
Chico: or maybe...you're ...SCARED!
Fangirls: DARE HE SAY IT? MORT RAINEY/JOHNNY IS ...SCARED??? [gasps fill the air]
Mort: Since when can you talk?
Chico: Since I'm about to be killed. [grins and sticks out tounge]
Housekeeper: I CANT GET NO...SATISFACTION! [dances with vaccum]
Mort: Get her Chico! Go on...get HER!
Chico: [ignores Mort]
Mort: dogs are useless. [walks downstairs and retrieves mountain dew]
Manuscript: I have now made my comeback. MUHA.
Mort: [sees manuscript] crap.
Housekeeper: Mr. Rainey, I found a story in the trash and even though it clearly stated that it was by a John Shooter, I took it out and assumed it was yours.
Mort: ....thanks
[Housekeeper leaves to go clean some more. Mort takes out book containing Secret Window and compares Shooter's story to his]
Shooter's story: blah blah woman blah love blah blah all you had blah he intended to kill her blah blah knew where to bury her blah blah garden blah blah...
Mort's story: blah blah woman blah love blah blah all you had blah he intended to kill her blah blah knew where to bury her blah blah garden blah blah...
Mort: Why didn't I know this was coming? Now to summon the housekeeper. SHIT! [spills mountain dew all over table]
Housekeeper: cleaning...senses...getting..sharper...SPILL IN KITCHEN. MUST CLEAN NOW!
[housekeeper runs to clean up mess while Mort runs upstairs to smoke]
-next day-
Mort: hmm...I'm all alone in a remote cabin on a strange lake. I think I'll unplug the phone.
-later-
[Mort sitting at table eating sandwhich and drinking mountain dew]
Mort: I just want to sleep. [lies down on floor] I sleep more than any other human being I have ever heard of.
Chico: [eats Morts sandwich] amen [prances away]
Mort: Chico-o-o-o-o don't be dico-o-o-u-u-r-a-a-aged.
Chico: Morty-y-y-y fork o-o-o-o-off
Mort: I'LL KILL YOU TOO!
-authorette comments-
thanks be to kaci for introducing me to the phrase fork off. I swear I shall never use it again throughout my parody because it belongs to her.
