Disclaimer: I don´t own the, they belong to Joss and Fox ( Arrrghhh!)
Notes: Ok guys ..I´ve never written anything like this before so …please don´t laugh ok. I know it may be a little risky, bit I tried my best ….I´m always open for suggestions ….and did I mention how much I loooove feedback?
RIPPLE
Jayne´s eyes flew open. Apart from the darkness surrounding him he could see her face floating above him.
He blinked irritated only to find River standing next to his bed. She was bowed down, her face mere inches from his.
" Hello sleepyhead…" she breathed, smiling at him.
Time to wake up indeed, he thought, sitting up. He crossed his arms in front of his chest, on second thought he made a move for his clothes that hung from a nearby chair. Angrily he realized that he found himself in pretty much the same situation, dream or not……he felt strangely exposed wearing only his briefs. She did not seem to mind though.
River could feel his embarrassment and the anger. She knew her calmness and the obvious amusement that was evident in her face vexed him.
" What is it?" Jayne growled at her.
River sighed.
She could feel things going downhill and she did not like it. This wasn´t how things were supposed to be between them now ….now that she finally ……
All she wanted was to hurl herself into his arms, for him to hold her, touch her ……
" I´m sorry.." she whispered
" I made a mess, I know! I didn´t mean to be ….First in the cargo bay, I didn´t mean to cause you trouble! And now …I just needed to see you, needed to be alone with you…I ….I´m sorry!"
She held her hands out to him in a gesture of helplessness.
Jayne closed his eyes for a moment, one hand moving over his face.
Damn that ruddin´ girl!
Did she even know what she was doing to him?
He looked at her. She wore that purple dress he liked, smelling all fresh and sweet …..
" Can´t change a ruddin´thing now.." he said roughly, taking her hands as she stepped closer. Now that he was at least wearing trousers he felt more comfortable with her around.
River let out a relieved sigh as she leaned against him.
Jayne looked down at her with a furrowed brow.
Here they were again …..he would most likely never admit it, but he had missed her.
He had gotten used to her sleeping in his bed and when she had not been there, something inside of him had felt empty and cold.
" One could say this is what started all the ruckus in the first place."
" Doesn´t change how I feel, that´s what I told Simon!" River told him quietly.
Jayne put his hands on her delicate shoulders, holding her a few inches away from him.
The look he gave her was one of guarded surprise.
How could she know what this was, what she felt?
Hell, he didn´t have a gorram clue ……in fact he had, but he tried to suppress it as much as he could. Jayne didn´t know if he would ever be able to really sort things through and come to terms with his feelings towards that girl.
River smiled at his facial expression while she carefully moved him backwards, forcing him to sit down on his bed again, until she stood between his legs.
Jayne snapped out of his thoughts. Right , better not think about that now….
Slowly he pulled her closer.
She was back, they were alone for the first time in quite a while,……. without the scrutinizing looks of the others ……no Simon, no Mal, ….
Jayne put his arms around her and buried his face in the softly creasing material of her dress. He could feel the warm skin underneath the cloth, underneath his cheek, feel her tiny hands raking through his short hair.
River sighed again, looking down on his bent head, the arch of his broad back……all muscle and sinew. There was nothing soft or relenting about him, everything was hard and firm…..even his mind had an edge to it.
She noticed several white scars on his back. She was not the only on this ship who carried a lot of pain inside, she remembered……the captain, Inara, Jayne …they all had their demons.
His cheek rested against her stomach, for a moment Jayne simply closed his eyes. It felt so good to have her near again.
This was yet another of her sneaky ways of getting closer to him, he thought in a split second of dismay. What was this girl doing to him?
None of the things he did lately were like him at all and yet, she seemed to provoke all kinds of weird impulses and emotions in him. Things that had grown too strong to simply ignore, not that Jayne hadn´t tried!
But lately he found that he did not want to. This was out of his hands now, the connection between them had grown too strong, too powerful to be denied.
Maybe it was a road to hell…..she and her brother were fugitives and now not only the alliance, but also Reavers and possibly Niska were out to get them ……most likely there would not be a happy end. Jayne found that somewhere along the line he had stopped caring……when she was around, things were different.
" You´re a knockout, you know that?" he finally said, looking up at her with a devilish grin.
River laughed, but as she moved her fingers over the scar on his chest her features grew serious again.
Gently, she took his face into her hands to kiss him. Before Jayne could think of a way to stop her, River had already leaned down, covering his lips with hers.
It felt as though all the air had been sucked out of his lungs, only to come rushing back the instant their tongues met.
River marvelled in the feeling, at the same time realizing that this was new to him in a way…..he was not used to being gentle and tender with women. And there was something else ……..she carefully probed his mind as she moved closer.
" River stop!" Jayne tried to push her away again. This was madness……
" What?" she asked confused, her impatience growing.
" Girl…..you don´t know where this is going …"
She shot him a mocking look mixed with a smile that was too gorram sly for Jayne´s taste.
What the hell….
" Oh I think I have a pretty good idea…" River whispered huskily, straddling his lap the way she had done on the dream plane.
Jayne tried to suppress a groan and caught a hold of her hands. She looked at him exasperated, pushing her hair out of her face.
" Now listen you stupid man!" she told him angrily
" I´m obviously in a clear state of mind! I know what I feel and I know what I want……..I know you think that some people might not understand this, but they will have to! And if they don´t ………this is between you and me, there is nobody else in this room! I know that you are always holding back when you are with me and that will stop now!"
" River.." Jayne tried to interrupt her ranting, but she cut him off
" No! I´m not a little girl. I´ve had it with everybody deciding what is good for me …….I have seen and felt enough pain to last me a hundred lifetimes. I have a sea of anger and grief buried inside of me……but I feel at peace when I´m with you. I want to be with you and it is not very polite to go and ruin things when I´m trying really hard to seduce you!"
Jayne swallowed hard, staring at her dumbfolded. She had rendered him speechless once again ……
" So stop trying to do what you think all the others might consider as the right or the honourable thing…….you told me yourself you had no honour to begin with!
You don´t have to hold back for me. I know who you are and it doesn´t scare me!"
" Ruddin´Hell!" he cursed
" There …you´ve done it again! Looked into my gorram brain!"
Of course she was right, he wanted her ….after her little rant he wanted her even more! And from her position he knew she could tell……
River lifted an eyebrow playfully.
She was unlike any woman he had ever encountered and that was just one of the reasons he was holding back………unlike any other, she had told him once.
Truth be told, he was not sure how to play this,….how to behave, what to do….
After all this girl was not some hooker he had picked up on a borderline planet to have his merry way with ……..he was at a loss, but he´d rather die than admit it.
Also ……even though she had cleared things up with the captain and her brother…..if Mal found them like this, he was probably still as good as dead.
River shook her head at him.
" Stop thinking!" she whispered.
" Love is not decent, love is glorious and shameless!"
She was quoting something, he could tell, but it unsettled him….
Now wait a ruddin´minute!
Since when had they started talking about love? That had never been mentioned before!…Jayne Cobb did not fall in love!
All these thoughts fled from his mind in a blur the moment River started to kiss her way up his shoulders to his neck, her warm hands moving over the muscles of his chest in seductive circles.
Yep, if anybody saw this he´d be a dead man. He couldn´t help grinning….a ruddin´good way to go though…..
His grip on her shoulders grew firmer, to make her look at him. It was dark, but she was close enough for him to see her eyes looking straight into his….they were clear and knowing.
So much for that ….
Rivers lips were slightly parted, sweet and inviting.
" Darlin´.." he hissed shakily, shaking his head.
" You´d better leave now. We both know what this is gonna lead to and …..I don´t have the ruddin´ strength to stop this, we both know that!"
River smiled, kissing him again, her hands splayed on his broad shoulders.
" No power in the ´verse will take me away ….." she breathed into his ear
" You are not taking advantage, I´m telling you for the last time, not now nor ever…..if I did not want to be here, I would not be! It´s just ……I know it has to be now, before something else happens!"
Jayne stared at her. He felt as though the temperature in his cabin had just risen by a hundred degrees.
River sighed. She could still feel his tension…..he did not know what to do ….it was almost laughable!
She shifted her weight very subtly to be rewarded with a sharp intake of breath from Jayne. His hands came to rest on her slim hips almost instinctively.
" River.." he growled at her warningly.
She looked down at him with a challenging smile.
How could she be so sure ….so full of fervour and feeling ?
There was something he needed to know……..Jayne just didn´t know how to…..
Carefully he pulled her towards him, his arms closing around her back. River rested her head on his shoulder, waiting.
Closing her yes, she could feel his heartbeat under her fingers. She knew what was bothering him…..she had to suppress a giggle. He was a grown man and still there were things that Jayne Cobb was unable to convey…..
His voice was raw when he finally managed to speak.
" River….are you…I mean ..have you ..?"
River looked straight at him, lifting an eyebrow.
" Have I done this before?", she whispered into his ear.
He nodded, perplexed.
" I´m not going to answer that question ……" she told him after a moments hesitation.
" Even if the answer was no……I´m not as innocent as Simon thinks!"
Jayne grinned back at her involuntarily.
" Oh ..I´ve noticed that!" he joked, nuzzling her neck.
River sighed. He was still unsure, nervous……she shifted her weight again, eliciting another hiss from Jayne. She leaned back very slowly, her eyes never leaving his face. With one swift, smooth motion River pulled the purple dress over her head, throwing it onto a pile of his clothes on the floor.
In the darkness of his bunk her pale skin shimmered like the feathers of a swan.
River looked down, suddenly shy from the expression of complete rapture in his face.
Jayne had no words.
He knew he should not be staring at her like this, but he couldn´t help it.
She was not curvy and voluptuous like some of the other women he had been with.
They did not even compare to this girl, who looked like she was cut from the finest, whitest marble. He had never seen anything more beautiful in his life than her in that exact moment.
It was a sight , Jayne knew he´d never forget, even if he lived for a hundred years.
Her dark hair tumbling down her smooth, white shoulders unto her tiny waist, her face slightly averted, neck exposed…..
He only wished he had the words to tell her, but he knew that if he would try to sweet-talk to her now it would end up being a gorram´ train wreck……
River looked at him confused, reaching out with her mind only to find his inner turmoil…..
She smiled. She knew he was not good with words, he didn´t need to be ……
River simply slid her arms around his neck, pressing against him. He could feel her smooth skin moving over his chest as River arched her back into him.
" God…." He said, his own voice sounding raspy in his ears " You´re beautiful…"
River closed her eyes, feeling his fingers gliding along her spine.
She put her cheek next to his, loving the sensual feeling of his stubble against her soft skin.
" Tonight …" Jayne could hear her whisper into his ear " Tonight, I´ll make you happy ….I´ll make us both happy."
