DISCLAIMER: Don´t own nothing, folks.but you already knew that, so no news there.
NOTES: Still in middle of exams, but thanks for your patience and ..guys .I got a straight A for my first exams! Yay me!!!! Thanks to all of you!!!!!!!!!! Will try to write more and update again. Thanks to all of you who still read this!!!
Uhh ..the lyrics are from Delta Goodrems beautiful song " Lost without you"
Hope you still enjoy...
LOCK AND KEY
Inara looked up to the tiny window high up in the wall. Not even if she could manage to somehow climb up the steel-walls to that window, she'd never be able to break through, let alone squeeze herself through it. There was still a dull, pulsing pain in her jaw and cheekbone where they had struck here. She didn't need a mirror to know that one side of her face was discoloured even if the swelling had gone down. But she didn't care about that. I didn´t even come close to the dull ache in her heart, to the fear that seemed to hold her in an iron grip.
She was beyond caring what happened to herself....she could not help but still fear the man Niska had contacted. The man she sacrificed everything for in order to escape his proximity, his attentions, his threats; House Madrassa, a bright future at the core, luxury, her friends ...she had given up everything and still it had not been enough.
Now another kind of family was at stake, another kind of home .Serenity and her friends aboard the ship. It was her fault, her weakness, her past that had given Niska the key to their destruction. She knew River was right; there would be no talking to Malcolm Reynolds once he had decided to play the gallant hero once more, to save the damsel in distress. Even though he didn´t know the first thing about sword fighting...or ....manners or ...
Inara took an agonizing breath, leaning against the cold wall.
I know I can be a little stubborn sometimes
I´ll say a little righteous and too proud
I just want to find a way to compromise
Because I believe that we can work things out.
No. ..you are the woman he loves ...River had said it with a voice as clear as fresh water. She had said it as though it were the most natural, obvious thing in the ´verse.
Mal ....That stubborn, offensive, horrible ..idiot that would never learn!
Inara leaned her forehead against the cold wall.
She could still hear his mocking voice after the incident with Saffron and her scheming ways that had almost killed them all..
You are a very graceful woman Inara.
She could still see his mocking smile the split second after she had thought that he´d seen through her ...that she had not stumbled and hit her head...
I knew you´d let her kiss you ..
But then again, some man did not recognize the facts even if they were biting them in the nose.
" Mal ...you damn idiot!" she whispered to herself, closing her eyes.
Maybe River was right...they were both too stubborn, to proud, too afraid to let there guard down long enough to admit their feelings. His scorn and disdain concerning her profession had hurt her, even if she would never admit it. It had not hurt to be called a whore...she´d been called worse things before and rose above it. Hers was an honourable profession, one that was held in high regard..she was a master of her art...
It had hurt because it was him, because he had wanted to insult her. It had hurt because he was the one man she cared about...so she had tried to insult him in turn; calling him a thief, a scoundrel, an amateur smuggler...reminding him of his not so successful business ventures.
She had given as good as she got.
I thought I had all the answers
Never giving in
But since you´ve gone
I admit that I was wrong
The sheer thought of him coming to her rescue was laughable. Niska had more men, more weapons...well, maybe not more weapons than Jayne.....
How on earth were they going to find her in that tiny little cell, in the heart of Niska´s vessel? It was suicide. Still ..they would come, as River had said they would. All she could do was pray that Mal´s determination would not get him killed.
"Don´t you dare die on me, Malcolm Reynolds! Don´t you dare!"
She´d never forgive herself. She´d never forgive him.
All I know is I´m lost without you
I´m not gonna lie
How am I gonna be strong without you
I need you by my side
If we ever say we´ll never be together in the end
And we ended with goodbye
Don´t know what I´do
I´m lost without you
" Well Henry ..that wasn´t so hard now, was it?" River whispered, leaning back in her chair with a devious smile. The man opposite to her let out a deep, shuddering breath. Pearls of sweat were running from his face, soaking his grey uniform. He shook his head, still staring at the girl in front of him, then up to the two grim faced men who were standing behind her chair to the side, seemingly flanking her.
" I´d say he sang just like a little bird..." Malcolm Reynolds said with a grim, but satisfied smile.
" That he did!" Jayne growled, his hand coming to rest on River´s left shoulder but his eyes never left their prisoner.
" And we didn´t even have to hurt a hair on your head now, Henry..aren´t you glad?"
Henry shook his head, watching fixedly as the emptiness seeped way from River´s features. Something was changing he could see it but not understand it. Suddenly ..she was just a girl again. A pretty girl with pale skin, big dark eyes and dark hair.. hauntingly pretty in her very own way, but with no hint of the monster that had transfixed him with its feral stare just moments ago.
" What the hell are you?" He croaked in confusion.
In her own mind could feel the orange cat rubbing itself against her legs, purring with content.
If she did not know better, she´d think the other thing was enjoying itself.
She took a moment to smooth her hair behind her ears, then she got up from the chair.
" River." she simply said with a girlish smile. " I´m River."
She and Mal turned around, ready to walk away when an ear shattering crash rang through the lab. Everybody, including the people waiting in the corridor whirled around to see what had happened. Henry´s chair had fallen over backwards and Jayne was towering over the thug, rubbing his right hand with his left.
" What the hell you doin´ Jayne?" Mal yelled at him in irritation. "He already talked!"
The tall mercenary shrugged at them with a wistful look on his face.
" Oh. hold your ruddin´ horses, will ya?" he growled impatiently.
" He´s just unconscious, didn´t kill him or anything ...can´t even take a decent beating, that guy, takes the fun right out of it.."
" So .what do you think you´re doing then ?"
Jayne stared at them a moment, gesturing towards River after a beat.
" That gorram´ thug bruised her face, can´t let him get away with that, now can I?"
His eyes roamed over that pretty, pale face, fixing on the swelling and the purplish discoloration on her chin. He only wished that ruddin´ bastard hadn´t passed out after just one blow.
.
I keep trying to find my way
But all I know is I´m lost without you
I keep trying to find my way
But all I know is that I´m lost without you
Mal lifted his eyebrows high enough to almost connect with his hairline
" Gee Jayne that ..almost sounded .."
" Aw. that´s so sweet!" Kaylee said from the corridor.
River tried to suppress a smile, failing miserably.
" Thanks, but maybe I should have mentioned Kaylee kind of already kicked him in the gut for that when he was down .repeatedly."
Mal whirled around to look at the pretty mechanic who suddenly felt the need to study her shoes with a very intent look.
Jayne grinned at her with a new found look of respect.
" Ya´ did?"
" You did what?" Mal asked incredulously.
" Kaylee.." Book chimed in with a bewildered look.
" Oh c´mon ..after what they did to River .and kidnapping Inara? He had it comin´!"
After another lingering look at Jayne River turned to her friend, moving over to her quickly. The two young women started whispering animatedly.
Mal turned, looking around at a loss for words.
" Shiny .just shiny!" he muttered to himself. Of late the sight of his li´l´Kaylee and lil´River Tam putting their heads together was becoming a disquieting omen.
They did not have time for this! They needed to make a move on Niska now .before ...
Malcolm Reynolds took a deep breath.
" What would you two be whispering about now?"
A glance passed between the two girls. Mal could see that the young doctor was having pretty much the same thoughts he himself had pondered only moments ago. It was written plainly on his handsome face that the whole dynamic between the two girls was starting to irritate him too.
River waited until they were all gathered in the corridor before she spoke, her eyes fixed on the captain.
"Henry gave us the key to the kingdom and he doesn't even know it!"
"What?"
"The access panels .They all have the same code.."
" Oh my god, Cap´n.she's right!" Kaylee squealed with excitement.
"You think it's doable .."
"Well .theoretically sure .I mean, we'd have to access a panel that is connected to the main server and .."
"Could one of you nice lil´ girls maybe tell me what you're talking about?"
Mal interrupted their vivacious talking. Both girls turned to him, her brother and Jayne with wide eyes.
"The access- panels .." Kaylee answered as though that explained everything.
"Yes?" Book prompted.
"Well they all have the same code according to Henry .a simple nine digit code ."
"Yes, we were there for that Kaylee, now apart from havin´ this fancy code, what.."
Kaylee groaned at her captain, exchanging a quick look with River. It was so obvious to her, how could they not see it?
" Okay..usually there would be at least two access codes, maybe even three or four, the further you progress towards the central part of the ship. For some reason Niska did not deem it necessary to take this precaution .maybe because his ship is so very well armed and new and fancy. He obviously feels safe inside."
"Maybe he's not good with numbers." Jayne said simply. For a moment everybody stared at him. "Well . I'd like to see y´all trying to memorize three or four gorram´ nine digit codes just to get into your own ship!"
"Okay Kaylee. I can see why that is good for us, we can get in but we´ll still have to fight our way through.."
"Oh .we can do a lot more than just get in." River said with an evil smile.
"Actually captain,..we can pretty much shut his whole ship down.!"
Mal stared at them.
" How?"
"See..." Kaylee started. "These systems, the good ones anyway have a kind of failsafe backdoor. You know in case one or more access panels are damaged or break down ..you'd be locked out of or inside your own ship, right?"
Mal nodded listening to his mechanics explanations with an expression of growing wonder on his face.
" Now, having such a fancy ship you´d not want that! So ..just in case, these panels are also connected to the ship's computer...so that the computer can override the system in case of emergency and opens the doors."
Jayne shook his head, brows knitting together.
"I still don´t get it.."
" It´s not a one way street." River clarified. "If the panels are connected to the computer it´s possible to access the computer using one of the panels as a terminal. With a little creative engineering we could log into their ship´s system and control it."
"You can do that?"
Kaylee shrugged with grin.
"I think I can..."
"It could be a trap." Simon told them carefully, a feeling of discomfort creeping up his back. "Or Henry could have lied..."
"He didn't .I'd know." River answered simply.
"As for the trap ..maybe, but it´s worth a try, isn´t it? If we could control the system we could lock at least some of Niska´s men in their quarters , we would know where they are.."
" What would you need?"
Malcolm Reynolds watched his first officer´s retreating back as Zoë disappeared into the corridor leading towards the cockpit. There was no going back now. He´d given her the coordinates of Niska´s little hideaway in a canyon not too far away. In a matter of seconds they´d be airborne, in a matter of minutes they´d be seeing the ship. There could be no mistakes now.
He could feel the familiar weight pressing down on his chest, the weight he had carried with him all through the war. They were all following him into this ..just like his soldiers had followed him...some of them to their death. There could be no miscalculations, no mistakes ...he could not loose one of them. There was too much at stake .and yet, he couldn´t stop either. He couldn´t just leave her ..he couldn´t . This was his fault, all of it. It had been his contempt, his insolence for her and her profession that had driven her away .even when she was reaching out to him, he had hidden behind his wall of jokes, hurtful remarks.
He had closed himself off from pretty much everybody, not just her .but she had felt it the most. It had just been so long since he had allowed himself to feel .something, anything .... that he hardly knew how to start anymore.
How am I ever gonna get rid of these blues ?
Baby I´m so lonely all the time
Everywhere I go I get so confused
You´re the only thing that´s on my mind
He had been thinking about her too often. In his mind that had made him weak. The war had taken too many things from him, not just the people he had lost; Comrades, Soldiers, Friends ...it had also taken his faith and the ability to open up. If you didn´t open to people things could not hurt you. And then there she was..a beauty beyond compare with the grace of a dancer, but also with a warm heart and a fiery spirit. Someone who bantered with him, who did not give in...
She wasn´t just beautiful to look at, her beauty was not skin deep and yet there was a sadness about her that he could relate too. He had been drawn to her ever since she came aboard with her colourful clothes and pillows, her courtesan ways and her soft, cultured voice. He had never seen her as a whore, he knew that was not what Inara was about ..and yet he had went on and one ..he knew that it had hurt her. He could see the hurt crossing her face for just a split second before the mask of the trained companion was back in place, like storm clouds chasing over a dark sky.
It wasn´t her profession he despised, it was the thought of her giving herself to other men ..albeit at her condition.but that was something he could not overlook. The thought of sharing her with anyone was .just ..so he had never made a move. So they had fought and fought and now ...he could loose her. But she wasn´t his...
Could you loose something you never even had?
My bed is so cold at night
I miss you more each day
Only you can make it right
I´m not too proud to say
All I know is I´m lost without you
I´m not gonna lie
How am I gonna be strong without you
I need you by my side
He closed his eyes.
" Is this the face that launched a thousand ships
and burned the topless towers of Illyum?
Sweet Helen, make me immortal with a kiss."
It was Rivers soft voice reciting the long forgotten verse. Mal opened his eyes to find her standing next to him.
" You were thinking of her.." She said very softly, her face as neutral as she could manage, but there was a small, hidden smile on her lips.
" When I was ...out of my mind..and had no control over the things I could do, I received images, sometimes..feelings, thoughts ..mere glimpses of the things that moved or preoccupied the people around me. With you it was always this ...the Marlowe verse and Inara´s ..face." She was speaking very hesitantly, obviously not quite at ease with the fact that she was intruding into his private thoughts.
Mal wasn't sure what to say. He simply stared at the strange, pretty girl next to him and the never ending wonder Simon Tam´s sister had turned out to be.
And again his respect for the grumpy mercenary rose up a notch. She had pried Jayne Cobb´s shell open like an oyster to find a pearl inside..those clear, dark eyes saw everything. A frightening thought none the less.
" She loves you too.." River told him, her voice barely above a whisper. Then she turned to walk away as Mal could feel upwards jerk of Serenity soaring into the air.
If we ever say we´ll never be together and we ended with goodbye
I don´t know what I´d do
I´m lost without you
HAAAA..evil cliffhANGER FAIRY AT WORK AGAIN.sorry but it´s kinda 2 o´clock in the morning and I need some sleep! More soon .I promise!!!! Please bear with me!!!
