Thanks for the reviews. And yes, I had a fabulous birthday. But I was ill
all last week which is why it's taken me a week to update. It's hard to get
motivated to type when you have earache and a pounding headache.
Chapter ten
Weren't things supposed to look better in the morning? Wasn't that what people always said? After a good nights sleep things that had seemed world endingly bad the night before were supposed to now seem ok. Of course the key words there were probably 'good nights sleep,' not 'night of relentless nightmares and tossing and turning.'
Mac had stayed with him, he was still there now, apparently asleep. He had to be tired. Everytime Richie had woken up so had Mac and he'd stayed awake until Richie was asleep again.
As far as memories of the previous night went (after the incident in the store) Richie vaguely remembered being led from the bathroom into the bedroom and getting into bed. It had been early, and under normal circumstances he would have protested at the mere suggestion of getting into bed at that time. But last night was hardly normal and Richie knew there was no way he could have faced Tessa or Connor. They'd seen it happen.
Mac had said repeatedly it wasn't his fault. Mac wasn't angry, he didn't blame Richie for any of it he'd said and then gone on to assure him Tessa and Connor didn't think badly of him either. And that was all well and good, but what about the police? Richie still didn't know why they hadn't come asking questions yet. He would have asked Mac last night, but he hadn't said anything last night... He'd been too busy with his internal dialogue and recriminations to have an external one with Mac. No wonder Mac had been worried.
But the police... What was he going to say? It wasn't an accident. Richie had meant to stab hazel eyes... Well. That wasn't completely true. He hadn't meant to do that. He'd just decided he couldn't kill, that he didn't have it in him. And then he'd seen that knife descending on him, remembered how much it had hurt last time, how much he wanted to live... Next thing he knew the sword was entering the mans abdomen. It wasn't a conscious action, but it was his action. And he had broken the showcase and picked the sword out. All his decisions had lead him to that point. A small part of him at least had meant to stab Hazel eyes. Maybe not kill him, but you didn't pick up a sword like that if you didn't mean to use it did you?
No. No matter how he looked at it Richie couldn't talk his way out of it, not even to himself. He'd killed a man. He was responsible for that death. Him. It was all on him. No matter what Mac had said last night it was his fault. He was to blame.
*****
Connor spent most of the night and early morning disposing of the bodies. He wouldn't normally just make two mortals disappear like that, but these two... The way Connor saw it they'd caused enough trouble for his family without them having to get the police involved in their untimely deaths too. If it had just been him then fine. But Richie... the boy was definitely not up to police questioning if last night was anything to go by.
Connor had been tempted to get Richie out of the bathroom himself, especially after seeing how upset Tessa was getting, but he had no idea how Richie would react to that so he'd thought it best to wait for Duncan's return.
Once Duncan was home and he'd removed Richie from the bathroom Tessa had relaxed a little, though not much. She had quite obviously wanted to talk to Duncan, but he'd never left Richie's side all night. So that left her Connor to talk to.
She was worried about Richie, she was worried about Duncan. She was in shock about last night, she still wasn't used to life with an Immortal. She certainly wasn't used to seeing people die in front of her and she wasn't used to the people she loved being in danger, or, for that matter, being in danger herself. But she didn't want to talk about it in great detail with Connor, she wanted to speak with Duncan, but she wasn't willing to take him away from Richie just yet.
Connor checked his watch. 9am. Considering they'd been in bed before eight last night Connor had expected them up by now, but so far neither of them had surfaced. Connor didn't know if that was a good sign or not. From the way Tessa was banging about in the kitchen, (she insisted she was baking... Who started baking at 8.30 in the morning?) she was taking it as a bad sign.
Connor was immensely grateful when Duncan emerged from Richie's room less than half an hour later. From the black bags under his eyes he hadn't had a good night.
Tessa stopped her 'baking' and rushed over o give him a hug.
"How is he? Are you ok? Did you sleep at all?" Tessa fired at him in quick succession.
"He's better this morning," Duncan said not quite answering the question. "I'm fine and I slept a little," Duncan finished with a smile. "How are you doing though?"
"Me? I'm perfectly fine Duncan," Tessa said dismissively.
Duncan raised an eyebrow. "Come on Tess."
She sighed. "I've been better," she admitted. "But I'm more concerned with how Richie is this morning."
"Like I said. He's doing better than last night."
Connor noticed the concerned look on Duncan's face and it would seem Tessa wasn't completely oblivious to it either...
"I'm fine Duncan," She said firmly. "You look after Richie."
"I can look after both of you," he said.
"I know," Tessa nodded. "But today you need to focus on him."
"No," Connor found himself saying. "Today he can focus on you and I will look after Richie."
Tessa looked like she was about to argue. Connor wasn't about to change his mind though, not after the conversation they had had last night and knowing how she really felt.
"Richie may not like that Connor," Duncan said uncertainly. He was torn between his love for Tessa, and the need to make sure she was really as ok as she was making out, and the need to be there if Richie needed him.
"If he wants you you'll be in the building Duncan. And he has spoken to me before, though I can't imagine him actually saying anything today to anyone, but if he wants you I will find you. Now go and look after Tessa."
He still looked unsure, but he nodded slightly. "Ok. But if he wants me or Tessa you'll come and get us?"
"In an instant," Connor promised.
*****
Richie was curled up on the sofa staring blankly out of the window. He'd only been up an hour and already he wanted to crawl back into bed and hide away from the world.
The world, in the form of Connor MacLoed of the clan MacLoed, however, had other idea.
Now technically, due to Duncan and Tessa being holed up in their bedroom (but available if Richie needed them he'd been told,) he should be having a question free, deep and meaningful conversation free morning. It would appear that Connor though felt it necessary to take over while his clansman wasn't about. Which, not that anyone would care, was annoying as hell.
"Wallowing in self pity is not going to make this any better you know?" Connor said conversationally taking a seat next to Richie.
"I'm not wallowing," Richie said not looking away from the window. It was raining outside and the raindrops on the window currently held his full attention.
"Of course you are," Connor said, "It is completely understandable, it's just not healthy. And dwelling on past events won't help you."
"Who says I'm dwelling on anything?" Richie asked. He really didn't want to do this now. He was tired and irritable and nothing anyone could say was going to make this any better. Nothing could take away from what he had done.
Connor chose that moment to his line of questioning, which Richie thought was entirely unfair. What was with this guy? How did he find it so easy to push Richie's buttons?
"Why do you have to make everything so hard for yourself?" Connor asked and was rewarded by getting Richie's full attention.
"What do you mean?" Richie asked after a long pause.
"I mean answering questions with a question or by denying something we both know is completely true. Haven't you learnt yet Richie that when you talk about what's bothering you it becomes easier to deal with?"
"I'm sick of talking Connor," Richie said hating the fact that Connor was right. "I'm sick of needing to talk, that's all I seem to be doing lately."
"But it will make things better, lad."
"How?" Richie demanded. "How can anything make this better? I killed someone! I took a life. I can't make that better. I can't take it back. I hate myself for it. Maybe you and Mac think it's justified, but I still took someone's life away!"
"And if you hadn't?" Connor asked in an annoyingly calm voice. "You would have been stabbed again. Maybe this time you'd die. Or if you got lucky and you survived again maybe Tessa wouldn't have been so lucky. Do you honestly think that man would have let her live after she refused to let him get to you? I don't. I think he would have stabbed you and then turned on her. Could you live with yourself if Tessa was hurt and you'd had an opportunity to stop it?"
Richie felt tears stinging his eyes. He hadn't thought of that... Tessa could have died too last night... But one man killed to save a womans life.... Did that make what he'd done ok?
"I still killed someone though Connor." Richie said quietly.
Connor patted his arm. "Aye lad. And if the circumstances had been different, if there had been an alternative I know you would have taken it. But sometimes you have to do things you wouldn't normally dream of doing to protect yourself and the ones you love. What you did saved both you and Tessa last night. It's never easy to take a life, nor should it be, but sometimes, just sometimes, it is necessary. I won't tell you not to feel sorry, or not to feel bad about it because you are the sort who will. You're a good lad. But remember this. You aren't the one who turned up here last night with the intention of murdering an innocent man. And intent is what makes all the difference Richie. All the difference in the world."
"You really think so?" Richie asked. He wanted so badly to believe that, he really did.
"Why would I start lying to you now?" Connor asked with a smile.
Richie smiled back weakly. So Connor really believed all that. And Mac probably did too. Maybe even Tessa. Now if he could just decided what he believed...
*****
The phone rang during dinner, which Richie was picking at uninterestedly, trying to force some down as three pairs of eyes kept staring at him. He made no move to answer the phone. Non of his friends called at this time.
It rang three times before Mac went to answer it. At the kitchen table Richie couldn't hear what was being said, but he did see Mac's grip tighten painfully around the receiver and his face flush red with anger. Tessa and Connor turned to look at Mac when they saw Richie staring.
"Problem?" Connor asked as soon as Mac replaced the receiver.
"I'm going out," was Mac's short reply.
Campbell, Richie thought. It had to be. Henchmen attack last night, he attacks tonight.
"Duncan?" Tessa asked, her face creased with worry.
"I'll be fine Tessa," Mac said reaching for his coat.
"Is it him?" she asked abandoning her dinner and rushing to his side.
Mac cast a quick look at Richie, who had felt his blood go cold the moment Mac had put the phone down. "Yes." He said.
Connor was on his feet too now. "I'm coming with you," he said.
"No," Mac said. "I need you to stay here with Tessa and Richie. I don't want them on their own until I have his head."
Connor remained standing for another then nodded his agreement. "OK then. Just don't take all night with it."
Tessa was hugging Mac now. She always worried so much when Mac had a challenge. Normally Richie would sit up her, waiting for him to return. Richie didn't know how good his company would be tonight. He was already on the verge of panicking and Mac hadn't even left the apartment. But Connor would be there, so he could look after Tessa...
"Richie?"
Richie hadn't noticed Mac coming back to the kitchen table and jumped at the sound of his name. He looked up and met Macs gaze.
"I will finish this tonight," he said with such sincerity that Richie almost felt sorry for Campbell who couldn't possible know what was coming to get him. Almost, but not quite.
Not trusting his voice to answer Richie just nodded. One or another he figured tonight would be the end of it. He just hoped it was Mac's way.
Chapter ten
Weren't things supposed to look better in the morning? Wasn't that what people always said? After a good nights sleep things that had seemed world endingly bad the night before were supposed to now seem ok. Of course the key words there were probably 'good nights sleep,' not 'night of relentless nightmares and tossing and turning.'
Mac had stayed with him, he was still there now, apparently asleep. He had to be tired. Everytime Richie had woken up so had Mac and he'd stayed awake until Richie was asleep again.
As far as memories of the previous night went (after the incident in the store) Richie vaguely remembered being led from the bathroom into the bedroom and getting into bed. It had been early, and under normal circumstances he would have protested at the mere suggestion of getting into bed at that time. But last night was hardly normal and Richie knew there was no way he could have faced Tessa or Connor. They'd seen it happen.
Mac had said repeatedly it wasn't his fault. Mac wasn't angry, he didn't blame Richie for any of it he'd said and then gone on to assure him Tessa and Connor didn't think badly of him either. And that was all well and good, but what about the police? Richie still didn't know why they hadn't come asking questions yet. He would have asked Mac last night, but he hadn't said anything last night... He'd been too busy with his internal dialogue and recriminations to have an external one with Mac. No wonder Mac had been worried.
But the police... What was he going to say? It wasn't an accident. Richie had meant to stab hazel eyes... Well. That wasn't completely true. He hadn't meant to do that. He'd just decided he couldn't kill, that he didn't have it in him. And then he'd seen that knife descending on him, remembered how much it had hurt last time, how much he wanted to live... Next thing he knew the sword was entering the mans abdomen. It wasn't a conscious action, but it was his action. And he had broken the showcase and picked the sword out. All his decisions had lead him to that point. A small part of him at least had meant to stab Hazel eyes. Maybe not kill him, but you didn't pick up a sword like that if you didn't mean to use it did you?
No. No matter how he looked at it Richie couldn't talk his way out of it, not even to himself. He'd killed a man. He was responsible for that death. Him. It was all on him. No matter what Mac had said last night it was his fault. He was to blame.
*****
Connor spent most of the night and early morning disposing of the bodies. He wouldn't normally just make two mortals disappear like that, but these two... The way Connor saw it they'd caused enough trouble for his family without them having to get the police involved in their untimely deaths too. If it had just been him then fine. But Richie... the boy was definitely not up to police questioning if last night was anything to go by.
Connor had been tempted to get Richie out of the bathroom himself, especially after seeing how upset Tessa was getting, but he had no idea how Richie would react to that so he'd thought it best to wait for Duncan's return.
Once Duncan was home and he'd removed Richie from the bathroom Tessa had relaxed a little, though not much. She had quite obviously wanted to talk to Duncan, but he'd never left Richie's side all night. So that left her Connor to talk to.
She was worried about Richie, she was worried about Duncan. She was in shock about last night, she still wasn't used to life with an Immortal. She certainly wasn't used to seeing people die in front of her and she wasn't used to the people she loved being in danger, or, for that matter, being in danger herself. But she didn't want to talk about it in great detail with Connor, she wanted to speak with Duncan, but she wasn't willing to take him away from Richie just yet.
Connor checked his watch. 9am. Considering they'd been in bed before eight last night Connor had expected them up by now, but so far neither of them had surfaced. Connor didn't know if that was a good sign or not. From the way Tessa was banging about in the kitchen, (she insisted she was baking... Who started baking at 8.30 in the morning?) she was taking it as a bad sign.
Connor was immensely grateful when Duncan emerged from Richie's room less than half an hour later. From the black bags under his eyes he hadn't had a good night.
Tessa stopped her 'baking' and rushed over o give him a hug.
"How is he? Are you ok? Did you sleep at all?" Tessa fired at him in quick succession.
"He's better this morning," Duncan said not quite answering the question. "I'm fine and I slept a little," Duncan finished with a smile. "How are you doing though?"
"Me? I'm perfectly fine Duncan," Tessa said dismissively.
Duncan raised an eyebrow. "Come on Tess."
She sighed. "I've been better," she admitted. "But I'm more concerned with how Richie is this morning."
"Like I said. He's doing better than last night."
Connor noticed the concerned look on Duncan's face and it would seem Tessa wasn't completely oblivious to it either...
"I'm fine Duncan," She said firmly. "You look after Richie."
"I can look after both of you," he said.
"I know," Tessa nodded. "But today you need to focus on him."
"No," Connor found himself saying. "Today he can focus on you and I will look after Richie."
Tessa looked like she was about to argue. Connor wasn't about to change his mind though, not after the conversation they had had last night and knowing how she really felt.
"Richie may not like that Connor," Duncan said uncertainly. He was torn between his love for Tessa, and the need to make sure she was really as ok as she was making out, and the need to be there if Richie needed him.
"If he wants you you'll be in the building Duncan. And he has spoken to me before, though I can't imagine him actually saying anything today to anyone, but if he wants you I will find you. Now go and look after Tessa."
He still looked unsure, but he nodded slightly. "Ok. But if he wants me or Tessa you'll come and get us?"
"In an instant," Connor promised.
*****
Richie was curled up on the sofa staring blankly out of the window. He'd only been up an hour and already he wanted to crawl back into bed and hide away from the world.
The world, in the form of Connor MacLoed of the clan MacLoed, however, had other idea.
Now technically, due to Duncan and Tessa being holed up in their bedroom (but available if Richie needed them he'd been told,) he should be having a question free, deep and meaningful conversation free morning. It would appear that Connor though felt it necessary to take over while his clansman wasn't about. Which, not that anyone would care, was annoying as hell.
"Wallowing in self pity is not going to make this any better you know?" Connor said conversationally taking a seat next to Richie.
"I'm not wallowing," Richie said not looking away from the window. It was raining outside and the raindrops on the window currently held his full attention.
"Of course you are," Connor said, "It is completely understandable, it's just not healthy. And dwelling on past events won't help you."
"Who says I'm dwelling on anything?" Richie asked. He really didn't want to do this now. He was tired and irritable and nothing anyone could say was going to make this any better. Nothing could take away from what he had done.
Connor chose that moment to his line of questioning, which Richie thought was entirely unfair. What was with this guy? How did he find it so easy to push Richie's buttons?
"Why do you have to make everything so hard for yourself?" Connor asked and was rewarded by getting Richie's full attention.
"What do you mean?" Richie asked after a long pause.
"I mean answering questions with a question or by denying something we both know is completely true. Haven't you learnt yet Richie that when you talk about what's bothering you it becomes easier to deal with?"
"I'm sick of talking Connor," Richie said hating the fact that Connor was right. "I'm sick of needing to talk, that's all I seem to be doing lately."
"But it will make things better, lad."
"How?" Richie demanded. "How can anything make this better? I killed someone! I took a life. I can't make that better. I can't take it back. I hate myself for it. Maybe you and Mac think it's justified, but I still took someone's life away!"
"And if you hadn't?" Connor asked in an annoyingly calm voice. "You would have been stabbed again. Maybe this time you'd die. Or if you got lucky and you survived again maybe Tessa wouldn't have been so lucky. Do you honestly think that man would have let her live after she refused to let him get to you? I don't. I think he would have stabbed you and then turned on her. Could you live with yourself if Tessa was hurt and you'd had an opportunity to stop it?"
Richie felt tears stinging his eyes. He hadn't thought of that... Tessa could have died too last night... But one man killed to save a womans life.... Did that make what he'd done ok?
"I still killed someone though Connor." Richie said quietly.
Connor patted his arm. "Aye lad. And if the circumstances had been different, if there had been an alternative I know you would have taken it. But sometimes you have to do things you wouldn't normally dream of doing to protect yourself and the ones you love. What you did saved both you and Tessa last night. It's never easy to take a life, nor should it be, but sometimes, just sometimes, it is necessary. I won't tell you not to feel sorry, or not to feel bad about it because you are the sort who will. You're a good lad. But remember this. You aren't the one who turned up here last night with the intention of murdering an innocent man. And intent is what makes all the difference Richie. All the difference in the world."
"You really think so?" Richie asked. He wanted so badly to believe that, he really did.
"Why would I start lying to you now?" Connor asked with a smile.
Richie smiled back weakly. So Connor really believed all that. And Mac probably did too. Maybe even Tessa. Now if he could just decided what he believed...
*****
The phone rang during dinner, which Richie was picking at uninterestedly, trying to force some down as three pairs of eyes kept staring at him. He made no move to answer the phone. Non of his friends called at this time.
It rang three times before Mac went to answer it. At the kitchen table Richie couldn't hear what was being said, but he did see Mac's grip tighten painfully around the receiver and his face flush red with anger. Tessa and Connor turned to look at Mac when they saw Richie staring.
"Problem?" Connor asked as soon as Mac replaced the receiver.
"I'm going out," was Mac's short reply.
Campbell, Richie thought. It had to be. Henchmen attack last night, he attacks tonight.
"Duncan?" Tessa asked, her face creased with worry.
"I'll be fine Tessa," Mac said reaching for his coat.
"Is it him?" she asked abandoning her dinner and rushing to his side.
Mac cast a quick look at Richie, who had felt his blood go cold the moment Mac had put the phone down. "Yes." He said.
Connor was on his feet too now. "I'm coming with you," he said.
"No," Mac said. "I need you to stay here with Tessa and Richie. I don't want them on their own until I have his head."
Connor remained standing for another then nodded his agreement. "OK then. Just don't take all night with it."
Tessa was hugging Mac now. She always worried so much when Mac had a challenge. Normally Richie would sit up her, waiting for him to return. Richie didn't know how good his company would be tonight. He was already on the verge of panicking and Mac hadn't even left the apartment. But Connor would be there, so he could look after Tessa...
"Richie?"
Richie hadn't noticed Mac coming back to the kitchen table and jumped at the sound of his name. He looked up and met Macs gaze.
"I will finish this tonight," he said with such sincerity that Richie almost felt sorry for Campbell who couldn't possible know what was coming to get him. Almost, but not quite.
Not trusting his voice to answer Richie just nodded. One or another he figured tonight would be the end of it. He just hoped it was Mac's way.
