Doom Witch
Author's Note: Salutations. This is the person who will slowly take over your world and then feed it to . . . THE BADGERS!
YES! BADGERS! YESSSS!
Mwahahhahahhahahahahhahahahhahahahahaahahhaaa!
* * * * * * * * * * *
- Chapter Ten - Waco Taco -
The unlikely allies had been flying for six Earth days and twenty hours. They would reach Moriara in time, therefore de-activating the time limit the Almighty Tallest held over Gaz. It was just from what they'd do when they reached Moriara that seemed to phase them, as, only two and a half of the four hours remaining to them had been all that had mattered when they had set off. They supposed they had better try to contact the Head Quarters.
In the meantime, GIR was pining, Zim was piloting and Dib was sleeping in the seat next to Zim.
"I want taaaacooos," GIR moaned, "I neeeeeeeed taaacoooos!"
Zim was interrupted from his piloting and turned to scowl at GIR.
"Silence, GIR!" he snapped, "You can have tacos on Moriara. No doubt they have the Space Tacos there."
"GIR Tacos." GIR corrected.
"Yeah. Sure."
The slight sound of Smells Like Teen Spirit came from the speakers in the Voot Runner, and it calmed Zim. He didn't know why getting to the planet in time was so important to him, or that why he should arrive so urgently was a necessity for the Tallest, but they were his leaders and they required him.
It was just a bad thing Gaz was involved.
Zim looked down at Dib beside him, and looked at his trusty Irken penknife sitting in the glovebox of the Voot, then back at Dib. It would be easy to kill him now, and why shouldn't he? He had done all Zim required off of him. Stupid human, he was a fool to sleep on Zim's watch.
Suddenly the ship shuddered and any chances of a sneak attack were abolished as Dib woke up with a jolt.
"What was that?" he yelled, but Zim calmed him with a wave of the hand, "Wha - Zim! What happened? What did GIR do now?"
"It wasn't him, Dib-Stink!" Zim snarled, trying to remain unsurprised himself, "GIR has been sitting joviantly by my side like a little shoe- frog."
"Uh - huh. Well, no offence, Zim, but from the looks of it outside, the reason we're being jolted around is because we're - um - under attack?" Dib said, pointing to the outside.
Zim looked out of the Voot and was admittedly surprised at the sight of laser cannons coming from the - - - Armada? What was it doing here? It must just be hovering here while the Tallest visit their relatives, Zim thought. So why was the Irken Armada attacking his Voot Runner?
Without another second to think, a blast hit them in the side of the ship and knocked the passengers over to the far right of the ship. Dib landed on Zim, who pushed him off angrily.
"YAAAAY!" GIR screamed, "We're doooomed! Hang it on a goosey! I won't have no GIR tacossss! OH NOOOOOOOOOO! Zimmy! We can't be dooooomed! NOOOOOOOOOO!"
"Calm down, GIR!" Zim ordered, settling himself down at the controls again and positioning the ship, "We'll be in the atmosphere in a matter of minutes, this is just a little unexpected, that's all."
"Okaaaaaaay!" GIR said, and sat back down quite relaxed, humming the Doom Song.
After Zim piloted his way through the mass attacks coming from the amazingly large Armada, which Dib was gawking over, the descent onto the planet was fast and hot, and very fast. Hang on, I said that. Okay.
After a last attempt to crash land the ship before it disappeared, the Armada settled down again to its well deserved break. They had succeeded in slowing Zim down, and they had had a little fun, too.
'Cos they really hated Zim.
The Voot Runner hurtled at an astonishing speed towards the ground, causing Dib and Zim to yell and scream, whereas GIR simply sat back with the anticipation of the reunion with his tacos. And these were "GIR" Tacos.
Anyway, the ship was going down at a very fast speed yadda yadda, and it crashed. Okay, fine, I'll explain that better. Here:
Meanwhile, the Voot Runner with Zim, Dib and the ever so slightly malfunctioning slave bot inside was zooming dangerously quickly towards the ground with terrible consequences a-looming.
"Zim, is this supposed to - AAAAAARRRGGHHH! - H-happen?" Dib gasped, in between screams, and looked to Zim, who was about to answer, but his safety restraints snapped under the tension and he fell forwards onto the control panel and screen, unconscious. Dib pulled him back into his seat and held him there, while trying not to snap his safety belts too.
Finally, the Irken spacecraft bounced off the ground once, twice, three times, and the screen smashed on the third. It was also then that Dib shut his eyes and used his hands to protect his face from the glass, letting go of Zim, who flew forwards without Dib to hold him back out of the front of the Voot.
Dib, slightly dazed, got up and looked to GIR, who was waltzing with a broken gearstick. He shook his head and grabbed the robot, placed him firmly in the driver's seat and ventured out into the unknown to retrieve Zim.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Red looked at the screen showing the Voot Runner smoking in the ground with GIR still waltzing with the lever. They cut to Dib scrambling out of the broken glass to get to Zim, who was lying face up very still.
"Is he dead?" Purple whispered, "Tell me he's dead, tell me he's dead!"
Red frowned, squinting his eyes at the screen.
"I don't know-" he started, "he could be . . . ah no, look, the human is shaking him awake."
Purple shook his head.
"It's not working though, is it? IS IT? IIISSSS ITTTT?" he screamed.
Red looked at him.
"No, but look. He's breathing! He'll be awake soon. Anyway, they're on the planet. We might have to wait a while for Zim to be revitalised-" Red faltered as the screen the two leaders had not been paying attention to had a large headed human in front of it, glaring at them.
"Aaaargh!" Purple yelled, "His head . . . ENORMOUS! Why is it so huge?"
GIR popped up in front of the large-headed boy and giggled in a high pitched voice.
"Whhhhyyy is his heaaad so big? Whhhyyyyy is his head so biiiig?" he screamed joyfully, but the huge headed human knocked him backwards. The human was holding Zim's gloved hand with his . . . four fingered one? FOUR FINGERS AND A THUMB???
Anyway, the human shook Zim's hand, trying to get him awake while still talking to the Almighty Tallest.
"Why is your head so big - I mean, who are you, human?" Red tried to say importantly, but got embarrassed when he saw his colleague's jaw wide open in horror at the size of the thing's head.
"My name is Dib," he said, "and you have my sister. I don't want you to have my sister! Give her back or I'll - hey!"
He had been interrupted by GIR, who was sleeping on top of Zim's head.
"Get off his head!" Dib yelled, "I'm trying to get him awake, you're not helping you stupid robot."
He turned back to the Almighty Tallest, his frown fixed.
"We will discuss the matter with Zim. Why he brought you I don't know. Are you his friend or something?" Purple asked, confused and dazed.
"NO!" the human yelled defensively, "I hate Zim. Zim hates me, but you see, the human you have, she's my sister. I want my sister!"
"We will talk with Zim. The sooner you get him awake, the sooner you will know what is happening. We have nothing more to say to you. Goodbye." Red grinned, and signed off.
Dib banged his fist on the small display screen in the Voot Cruiser.
"Urgh! Why couldn't it have been me that was horribly knocked unconscious? Wait-" he muttered to himself, and began patting Zim's hand again in an attempt to wake him up. The Irken lay with his mouth slightly open and his antennae down. Dib saw Zim unconscious a lot nowadays. All because of Gaz.
"WOOOOOOOOO!" a sudden scream from GIR erupted from a nearby crowd of Irkens, "YAAAAY! Gimme a GIR Taco! They mine!"
A muttering chorus came next from the crowd, but it was the Irkens involved.
"What do you mean? These are Space Tacos!" one said.
"No they not! The Tallest is baaaaaaaaaaaaad! Like a goose! I like goose. They make me smile. They GIR Tacos! But not GIR Gooses. Noooooo, I wanna GIR Gooses." He disagreed, and the gullible Irken civilians muttered again in interest.
"So you are the creator of these delicious snacks?" one male Irken asked in awe.
"Or are you the creator of these gooses you speak of?" a female asked.
"I maded the tacos! They GIR Tacos! They the tacos of GIR!" GIR confirmed, and the Irkens gasped in admiration.
"It's the Lord of the Tacos!" the female that had spoken before cried, "Come! Let us bless him and bleat after him like lambs until we get bored!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAY!" the crowd agreed, and as GIR ran up to Dib happily, the crowd followed him. Dib frowned.
"You're going to attract attention to us, GIR," Dib scorned, "What about me? I look nothing like an Irken! What will people think?"
"I don't care!" GIR shrieked, and began running in circles. The others followed him, and Dib sighed, turning back to Zim.
"Come on, Zim," Dib moaned, "Come on, we need to go save Gaz. That's what you're here for, you know it is."
Suddenly, Zim groaned and moved his head slightly to the right.
"Lies," he croaked, "I am here to obey my masters, no more."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever, Zim. We have to contact your great masters. Come on!"
"Fine. It makes me glad to know I will soon speak to my Almighty Tallest once again face to face. Uhh - why do I hurt?" Zim asked.
"Your seatbelt broke and you slammed into the screen, then you flew out of the Voot when we landed."
"Ah."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Gaz sat in her little bubble, bored and weak. She had been without her GameSlave, and she was feeling very tired and drained. There must be some kind of special device in this thing because she hadn't even been able to stand up, and she had been eating and drinking fine, disgusting though it was.
The screen flickered and those two green guys appeared again.
"Hello, little girl," the red-eyed one sneered, "Feeling suitably weak just now?"
Gaz frowned.
"Well, adjust yourself 'cos you're just about to see your favourite Irken and your brother." The purple one sneered, and Gaz raised an eyebrow, "Yup, they're here. Little Zim flew the ship the whole way without hardly any rest, then fell unconscious under the impact of landing."
Gaz blinked and swallowed.
"Don't you want to know if he's okay?" Red sneered, "They've just contacted us and Zim has only just woken up, your brother wants us to prove you're still alive so we're going to put you on screen, okay?"
The screen buzzed and Dib's abnormally large head appeared. His jaw dropped when he saw her barely even sitting on the floor, it was more of a useless flop, and he blinked.
"GAZ!" he yelled, once he had adjusted himself, "Are you okay? Oh my God, what did they do to you? Wait! Wait, hey you - um - Irken leadery things! How do we know this isn't pre-recorded?"
"Ask her a question that she could only answer if you asked her now," a somewhat weaker Zim's voice suggested from the background.
"Okay . . . " Dib allowed, "Um, Gaz! You know how you thought I took one piece of pizza last time we went to Bloaty's? Well, I actually took two. You don't mind, do you?"
"What? Dib, I swear I will kill you. My pizza? Two slices? Two slices of beautifully cheesed pizza and you stole it from the one person deserving enough? Do you know what I have to put up with? I'm in a bubble, Dib, with gruel to eat! And you're talking about pizza! You want me to starve?" Gaz tried to yell but failed, she was obviously too weak.
Dib stepped back, a little scared and guilty at the same time. Zim took his place and attempted to look angry, but seeing the state she was in he couldn't help feeling a little worried.
A little.
"Um," he said, "you okay?"
"No." Gaz replied. "Can't you get me out?"
"I'm working on it, pitiful one. Look at you in the cage, it's because of me, yes? Well, I don't want to be here, and I don't want to have to be saving YOU! YOU STUPID, DELINQUENT- okay. I'm going to speak to the Tallest now. I think Dib believes you're alive now. Yes?" there was a pause. Then, "Dib, look, she's right there, ALIVE! You need help, Dib. She's alive. My Tallest? We know she's alive. What do you want us to do?"
Gaz's screen went black, but Zim and Dib saw the Tallest on the screen in the smashed - up Voot Runner.
"Can you let my sister go now?" Dib asked.
"Come and get her at the Head Quarters, you can find it yourselves. Only one of you will get through security so make up your minds which." Red told them.
"Why is only one of us-" Dib began, but Zim shook his head warningly.
"How long do we have my Tallest?" he asked.
"Well, we're not setting a limit, but the way your friend is going, Zim, I'd say she'd be dead in about three days, so somewhere in between then if you want her alive, I think."
Zim tried to hide a gulp but failed, and satisfied, the Tallest signed off.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Zim, Dib, GIR and the Taco Zombies walked through the streets of Planet Moriara. They were in the capital, so they were sure the Head Quarters would be here somewhere. They'd been walking all day and had hardly spoken a word, so Dib did now.
"Um, Zim, how are the leaders of your Empire visiting their relatives?" he asked.
"Well, they came to the planet and go to their house and say hello and have a cup of-" Zim began, and Dib put on an annoyed face.
"I thought Irkens were developed, not born, so how can they have siblings and grandparents and stuff?" he asked.
"Well, the Almighty Tallests' families are different. Each Tallest is assigned a family. Every century, one of the relatives in each one's family is sacrificed. But there was a sacrificing just about a decade or two ago so the ones they're visiting have a while yet, they always visit the ones who are going next, you see." Zim explained, and Dib looked very bewildered.
"That's just stupid." he said, and Zim shrugged.
"Yes, families are pointless. But the executions are fun . . . " he smiled happily, and Dib looked scared.
They didn't speak for another long while, and they stopped off for a while so the Taco Zombies and GIR could stock up on "GIR Tacos", then were on the move again. Zim had a detection device, which was pointing the way to the Head Quarters; he has loads of cool gadgets like that. By this time, he had regained his strength and was no longer in pain.
"Zim," Dib asked, "Do you care for Gaz?"
"Don't be silly!" Zim snorted, "Of course I don't. I hate your father!"
"GAZ, Zim! GAZ! Do you care for Gaz? Why are you saving her? Don't you think that your leaders telling you to come here and also having Gaz at the exact same time is just a little weird? Don't you think it could be a trap or a set up or something?"
"Why would the Tallest do that?"
"I DON'T KNOW! Did you maybe do something to upset them?"
Zim flashed back to his destroying the planet.
"MWAAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!" he had yelled.
"But Sir, we're still on our own planet!" an objecting voice yelled.
"SILENCE!" Zim had ordered, "Twist those knobs! Twist those knobs! YOU! Pull some levers, pull some leverrrrs!"
Ah, those had been the days. The days without the Armada, without Earth, without GIR, without Dib and all those horrible people he knew. And Gaz. Especially Gaz.
"Zim?" Dib asked.
"No, no, I can't think of anything I did to upset my Tallest!" Zim yelled, "How could I, a great and so incredibly wonderful and respected DESTRUCTION MACHINE do anything to upset my beloved leaders?"
Dib didn't answer.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
A/N: WOO! Are you enjoying it? Got loooaaaaaaaads to go yet. I'm really having fun writing it so you'll have to put up with me!
Next chapter: Zim and Dib find the headquarters and decide who should go in. Meanwhile, GIR tries to find Red's grandma and Purple's sister because that's what Zim wanted him to do.
You need to read it!
YES! REAAAAD!
Do you want to invoke the wrath of the badgers?
DO YOU!?!?!?!?
Didn't think so.
Review!
Author's Note: Salutations. This is the person who will slowly take over your world and then feed it to . . . THE BADGERS!
YES! BADGERS! YESSSS!
Mwahahhahahhahahahahhahahahhahahahahaahahhaaa!
* * * * * * * * * * *
- Chapter Ten - Waco Taco -
The unlikely allies had been flying for six Earth days and twenty hours. They would reach Moriara in time, therefore de-activating the time limit the Almighty Tallest held over Gaz. It was just from what they'd do when they reached Moriara that seemed to phase them, as, only two and a half of the four hours remaining to them had been all that had mattered when they had set off. They supposed they had better try to contact the Head Quarters.
In the meantime, GIR was pining, Zim was piloting and Dib was sleeping in the seat next to Zim.
"I want taaaacooos," GIR moaned, "I neeeeeeeed taaacoooos!"
Zim was interrupted from his piloting and turned to scowl at GIR.
"Silence, GIR!" he snapped, "You can have tacos on Moriara. No doubt they have the Space Tacos there."
"GIR Tacos." GIR corrected.
"Yeah. Sure."
The slight sound of Smells Like Teen Spirit came from the speakers in the Voot Runner, and it calmed Zim. He didn't know why getting to the planet in time was so important to him, or that why he should arrive so urgently was a necessity for the Tallest, but they were his leaders and they required him.
It was just a bad thing Gaz was involved.
Zim looked down at Dib beside him, and looked at his trusty Irken penknife sitting in the glovebox of the Voot, then back at Dib. It would be easy to kill him now, and why shouldn't he? He had done all Zim required off of him. Stupid human, he was a fool to sleep on Zim's watch.
Suddenly the ship shuddered and any chances of a sneak attack were abolished as Dib woke up with a jolt.
"What was that?" he yelled, but Zim calmed him with a wave of the hand, "Wha - Zim! What happened? What did GIR do now?"
"It wasn't him, Dib-Stink!" Zim snarled, trying to remain unsurprised himself, "GIR has been sitting joviantly by my side like a little shoe- frog."
"Uh - huh. Well, no offence, Zim, but from the looks of it outside, the reason we're being jolted around is because we're - um - under attack?" Dib said, pointing to the outside.
Zim looked out of the Voot and was admittedly surprised at the sight of laser cannons coming from the - - - Armada? What was it doing here? It must just be hovering here while the Tallest visit their relatives, Zim thought. So why was the Irken Armada attacking his Voot Runner?
Without another second to think, a blast hit them in the side of the ship and knocked the passengers over to the far right of the ship. Dib landed on Zim, who pushed him off angrily.
"YAAAAY!" GIR screamed, "We're doooomed! Hang it on a goosey! I won't have no GIR tacossss! OH NOOOOOOOOOO! Zimmy! We can't be dooooomed! NOOOOOOOOOO!"
"Calm down, GIR!" Zim ordered, settling himself down at the controls again and positioning the ship, "We'll be in the atmosphere in a matter of minutes, this is just a little unexpected, that's all."
"Okaaaaaaay!" GIR said, and sat back down quite relaxed, humming the Doom Song.
After Zim piloted his way through the mass attacks coming from the amazingly large Armada, which Dib was gawking over, the descent onto the planet was fast and hot, and very fast. Hang on, I said that. Okay.
After a last attempt to crash land the ship before it disappeared, the Armada settled down again to its well deserved break. They had succeeded in slowing Zim down, and they had had a little fun, too.
'Cos they really hated Zim.
The Voot Runner hurtled at an astonishing speed towards the ground, causing Dib and Zim to yell and scream, whereas GIR simply sat back with the anticipation of the reunion with his tacos. And these were "GIR" Tacos.
Anyway, the ship was going down at a very fast speed yadda yadda, and it crashed. Okay, fine, I'll explain that better. Here:
Meanwhile, the Voot Runner with Zim, Dib and the ever so slightly malfunctioning slave bot inside was zooming dangerously quickly towards the ground with terrible consequences a-looming.
"Zim, is this supposed to - AAAAAARRRGGHHH! - H-happen?" Dib gasped, in between screams, and looked to Zim, who was about to answer, but his safety restraints snapped under the tension and he fell forwards onto the control panel and screen, unconscious. Dib pulled him back into his seat and held him there, while trying not to snap his safety belts too.
Finally, the Irken spacecraft bounced off the ground once, twice, three times, and the screen smashed on the third. It was also then that Dib shut his eyes and used his hands to protect his face from the glass, letting go of Zim, who flew forwards without Dib to hold him back out of the front of the Voot.
Dib, slightly dazed, got up and looked to GIR, who was waltzing with a broken gearstick. He shook his head and grabbed the robot, placed him firmly in the driver's seat and ventured out into the unknown to retrieve Zim.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Red looked at the screen showing the Voot Runner smoking in the ground with GIR still waltzing with the lever. They cut to Dib scrambling out of the broken glass to get to Zim, who was lying face up very still.
"Is he dead?" Purple whispered, "Tell me he's dead, tell me he's dead!"
Red frowned, squinting his eyes at the screen.
"I don't know-" he started, "he could be . . . ah no, look, the human is shaking him awake."
Purple shook his head.
"It's not working though, is it? IS IT? IIISSSS ITTTT?" he screamed.
Red looked at him.
"No, but look. He's breathing! He'll be awake soon. Anyway, they're on the planet. We might have to wait a while for Zim to be revitalised-" Red faltered as the screen the two leaders had not been paying attention to had a large headed human in front of it, glaring at them.
"Aaaargh!" Purple yelled, "His head . . . ENORMOUS! Why is it so huge?"
GIR popped up in front of the large-headed boy and giggled in a high pitched voice.
"Whhhhyyy is his heaaad so big? Whhhyyyyy is his head so biiiig?" he screamed joyfully, but the huge headed human knocked him backwards. The human was holding Zim's gloved hand with his . . . four fingered one? FOUR FINGERS AND A THUMB???
Anyway, the human shook Zim's hand, trying to get him awake while still talking to the Almighty Tallest.
"Why is your head so big - I mean, who are you, human?" Red tried to say importantly, but got embarrassed when he saw his colleague's jaw wide open in horror at the size of the thing's head.
"My name is Dib," he said, "and you have my sister. I don't want you to have my sister! Give her back or I'll - hey!"
He had been interrupted by GIR, who was sleeping on top of Zim's head.
"Get off his head!" Dib yelled, "I'm trying to get him awake, you're not helping you stupid robot."
He turned back to the Almighty Tallest, his frown fixed.
"We will discuss the matter with Zim. Why he brought you I don't know. Are you his friend or something?" Purple asked, confused and dazed.
"NO!" the human yelled defensively, "I hate Zim. Zim hates me, but you see, the human you have, she's my sister. I want my sister!"
"We will talk with Zim. The sooner you get him awake, the sooner you will know what is happening. We have nothing more to say to you. Goodbye." Red grinned, and signed off.
Dib banged his fist on the small display screen in the Voot Cruiser.
"Urgh! Why couldn't it have been me that was horribly knocked unconscious? Wait-" he muttered to himself, and began patting Zim's hand again in an attempt to wake him up. The Irken lay with his mouth slightly open and his antennae down. Dib saw Zim unconscious a lot nowadays. All because of Gaz.
"WOOOOOOOOO!" a sudden scream from GIR erupted from a nearby crowd of Irkens, "YAAAAY! Gimme a GIR Taco! They mine!"
A muttering chorus came next from the crowd, but it was the Irkens involved.
"What do you mean? These are Space Tacos!" one said.
"No they not! The Tallest is baaaaaaaaaaaaad! Like a goose! I like goose. They make me smile. They GIR Tacos! But not GIR Gooses. Noooooo, I wanna GIR Gooses." He disagreed, and the gullible Irken civilians muttered again in interest.
"So you are the creator of these delicious snacks?" one male Irken asked in awe.
"Or are you the creator of these gooses you speak of?" a female asked.
"I maded the tacos! They GIR Tacos! They the tacos of GIR!" GIR confirmed, and the Irkens gasped in admiration.
"It's the Lord of the Tacos!" the female that had spoken before cried, "Come! Let us bless him and bleat after him like lambs until we get bored!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAY!" the crowd agreed, and as GIR ran up to Dib happily, the crowd followed him. Dib frowned.
"You're going to attract attention to us, GIR," Dib scorned, "What about me? I look nothing like an Irken! What will people think?"
"I don't care!" GIR shrieked, and began running in circles. The others followed him, and Dib sighed, turning back to Zim.
"Come on, Zim," Dib moaned, "Come on, we need to go save Gaz. That's what you're here for, you know it is."
Suddenly, Zim groaned and moved his head slightly to the right.
"Lies," he croaked, "I am here to obey my masters, no more."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever, Zim. We have to contact your great masters. Come on!"
"Fine. It makes me glad to know I will soon speak to my Almighty Tallest once again face to face. Uhh - why do I hurt?" Zim asked.
"Your seatbelt broke and you slammed into the screen, then you flew out of the Voot when we landed."
"Ah."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Gaz sat in her little bubble, bored and weak. She had been without her GameSlave, and she was feeling very tired and drained. There must be some kind of special device in this thing because she hadn't even been able to stand up, and she had been eating and drinking fine, disgusting though it was.
The screen flickered and those two green guys appeared again.
"Hello, little girl," the red-eyed one sneered, "Feeling suitably weak just now?"
Gaz frowned.
"Well, adjust yourself 'cos you're just about to see your favourite Irken and your brother." The purple one sneered, and Gaz raised an eyebrow, "Yup, they're here. Little Zim flew the ship the whole way without hardly any rest, then fell unconscious under the impact of landing."
Gaz blinked and swallowed.
"Don't you want to know if he's okay?" Red sneered, "They've just contacted us and Zim has only just woken up, your brother wants us to prove you're still alive so we're going to put you on screen, okay?"
The screen buzzed and Dib's abnormally large head appeared. His jaw dropped when he saw her barely even sitting on the floor, it was more of a useless flop, and he blinked.
"GAZ!" he yelled, once he had adjusted himself, "Are you okay? Oh my God, what did they do to you? Wait! Wait, hey you - um - Irken leadery things! How do we know this isn't pre-recorded?"
"Ask her a question that she could only answer if you asked her now," a somewhat weaker Zim's voice suggested from the background.
"Okay . . . " Dib allowed, "Um, Gaz! You know how you thought I took one piece of pizza last time we went to Bloaty's? Well, I actually took two. You don't mind, do you?"
"What? Dib, I swear I will kill you. My pizza? Two slices? Two slices of beautifully cheesed pizza and you stole it from the one person deserving enough? Do you know what I have to put up with? I'm in a bubble, Dib, with gruel to eat! And you're talking about pizza! You want me to starve?" Gaz tried to yell but failed, she was obviously too weak.
Dib stepped back, a little scared and guilty at the same time. Zim took his place and attempted to look angry, but seeing the state she was in he couldn't help feeling a little worried.
A little.
"Um," he said, "you okay?"
"No." Gaz replied. "Can't you get me out?"
"I'm working on it, pitiful one. Look at you in the cage, it's because of me, yes? Well, I don't want to be here, and I don't want to have to be saving YOU! YOU STUPID, DELINQUENT- okay. I'm going to speak to the Tallest now. I think Dib believes you're alive now. Yes?" there was a pause. Then, "Dib, look, she's right there, ALIVE! You need help, Dib. She's alive. My Tallest? We know she's alive. What do you want us to do?"
Gaz's screen went black, but Zim and Dib saw the Tallest on the screen in the smashed - up Voot Runner.
"Can you let my sister go now?" Dib asked.
"Come and get her at the Head Quarters, you can find it yourselves. Only one of you will get through security so make up your minds which." Red told them.
"Why is only one of us-" Dib began, but Zim shook his head warningly.
"How long do we have my Tallest?" he asked.
"Well, we're not setting a limit, but the way your friend is going, Zim, I'd say she'd be dead in about three days, so somewhere in between then if you want her alive, I think."
Zim tried to hide a gulp but failed, and satisfied, the Tallest signed off.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Zim, Dib, GIR and the Taco Zombies walked through the streets of Planet Moriara. They were in the capital, so they were sure the Head Quarters would be here somewhere. They'd been walking all day and had hardly spoken a word, so Dib did now.
"Um, Zim, how are the leaders of your Empire visiting their relatives?" he asked.
"Well, they came to the planet and go to their house and say hello and have a cup of-" Zim began, and Dib put on an annoyed face.
"I thought Irkens were developed, not born, so how can they have siblings and grandparents and stuff?" he asked.
"Well, the Almighty Tallests' families are different. Each Tallest is assigned a family. Every century, one of the relatives in each one's family is sacrificed. But there was a sacrificing just about a decade or two ago so the ones they're visiting have a while yet, they always visit the ones who are going next, you see." Zim explained, and Dib looked very bewildered.
"That's just stupid." he said, and Zim shrugged.
"Yes, families are pointless. But the executions are fun . . . " he smiled happily, and Dib looked scared.
They didn't speak for another long while, and they stopped off for a while so the Taco Zombies and GIR could stock up on "GIR Tacos", then were on the move again. Zim had a detection device, which was pointing the way to the Head Quarters; he has loads of cool gadgets like that. By this time, he had regained his strength and was no longer in pain.
"Zim," Dib asked, "Do you care for Gaz?"
"Don't be silly!" Zim snorted, "Of course I don't. I hate your father!"
"GAZ, Zim! GAZ! Do you care for Gaz? Why are you saving her? Don't you think that your leaders telling you to come here and also having Gaz at the exact same time is just a little weird? Don't you think it could be a trap or a set up or something?"
"Why would the Tallest do that?"
"I DON'T KNOW! Did you maybe do something to upset them?"
Zim flashed back to his destroying the planet.
"MWAAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!" he had yelled.
"But Sir, we're still on our own planet!" an objecting voice yelled.
"SILENCE!" Zim had ordered, "Twist those knobs! Twist those knobs! YOU! Pull some levers, pull some leverrrrs!"
Ah, those had been the days. The days without the Armada, without Earth, without GIR, without Dib and all those horrible people he knew. And Gaz. Especially Gaz.
"Zim?" Dib asked.
"No, no, I can't think of anything I did to upset my Tallest!" Zim yelled, "How could I, a great and so incredibly wonderful and respected DESTRUCTION MACHINE do anything to upset my beloved leaders?"
Dib didn't answer.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
A/N: WOO! Are you enjoying it? Got loooaaaaaaaads to go yet. I'm really having fun writing it so you'll have to put up with me!
Next chapter: Zim and Dib find the headquarters and decide who should go in. Meanwhile, GIR tries to find Red's grandma and Purple's sister because that's what Zim wanted him to do.
You need to read it!
YES! REAAAAD!
Do you want to invoke the wrath of the badgers?
DO YOU!?!?!?!?
Didn't think so.
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