Doom Witch
Author's Note : I love Evanescence! Not as much as Nirvana but they rock too. Amy Lee has the coolest clothes! Going to restrict my Author's Note this time. Meep! Okay . . . this chapter is going to have Dib and Zim meeting Invader Jed. The two slave bots will bond, but will Jed kill Zim or vice versa? Dun dun DUNN! Hee.
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- Chapter Seventeen - Assassin -
The smoke parted, Dib and Zim stared on in horror, while GIR simply stood and "oooooed!" at it. An Irken possibly just slightly smaller than Zim's artificial height (Yay someone smaller than Zim!) emerged, with a robot stood by her side looking quite serious. As the debris settled and the small fire that was result of the collision had burnt itself out, the character jumped off the roof with the two smashed Voot Cruisers and landed like a cat on all fours, then stood up straight. Her SIR unit hopped down next to her and stood vigilant.
"T-Tak?" Zim stammered in disbelief, and the other Irken smiled nastily, then shook her head.
Zim's jaw dropped, and as Dib had already seen what was coming he wasn't as surprised, but it wasn't exactly the most subtle landing. Without a word from any of the figures standing on the lawn, the new arrival pulled out a laser gun, which was slightly larger than a pistol and pointed it at Dib, who cried out. Zim grinned evilly, but his eyes froze when she looked as if she'd made a careless mistake, and swiveled the gun to point at the male Irken's head.
"Inside," she growled, tilting the gun forcing Zim inside. Dib followed, and the Irken didn't object to this nosy inhabitant of the planet doing so. GIR and the female Irken's robot came in closely behind, MAX closing the door behind all of them. GIR sat on the rug and whipped out a box of popcorn, sitting like a teddybear with the box between his legs that weren't even attached to himself anyway. The Irken and her robot stood in front of the TV and the female kept her eye firmly set on Zim's, who stared at her in fury and confusion.
"What is the meaning of this?" Zim demanded, his hands clenched in fists against the sofa, furious at being treated as a prisoner in his own home, especially by one of his own kind. Dib looked sideways and understood Zim's frustration, and was very glad that this Irken assassin was no longer pointing that nasty looking gun at him. He was still beginning to wish he hadn't followed them inside the house, because thinking on it that was probably quite a stupid thing to do.
"You're not in control here, Invader Zim," the young Irken reminded him, "I am."
Zim growled at her, his eyes very narrow. Hers were angry and focused, a look Dib thought looked like she had wanted to point her gun at Zim for quite a while. He supposed it was because this Irken was Tak's 'sister' and was seeking revenge. Looking again at his enemy, he realised that Zim wasn't sure who this was, and he, like Dib had originally thought, that this was indeed Tak herself.
"And it looks like I'll be in control from now on," the intruder snarled, pushing a button which Dib figured must be the equivalent to the safety on human guns and tightening a grip on the shiny black handle, the barrel aimed right at Zim's head.
"What is this?" Zim snapped, "Who are you?"
The Irken smiled wryly.
"My name is Invader -"
"Who are you?!"
"My name is Invader -"
"Who are you?!"
"My name is Invader Jed. I have been training on Devastis for the past three years, having drilled into my mind: To seek my revenge on you, Zim. Well, actually, my sister's revenge, I'm just performing her wrath via myself, who will then take up her plan to turn the Earth into a big box of snacks. A round box . . . of snacks." She replied obligingly, with the same evil voice Zim wielded, except hers was slightly softer, less intense.
"What do you mean?" Zim still didn't understand, "What revenge? Who's your sister?"
Invader Jed laughed and Zim flinched a little. "You haven't twigged yet, Zim? My sister is Tak, who you ejected into space in a Voot Cruiser emergency pod. I was planning on setting up my base first and choosing a disguise, but it looks like I'm just going to have to kill you now and do all that later, thanks to my Voot going a little insane on me. I guess you're lucky in a way, Zim. The gun will be quick. What I had in plan for you was slow and horrible. Oh well."
She pressed another button, probably a second safety. She put one of her two fingers on the trigger, preparing to pull and destroy her rival.
"Meeow!" GIR shrieked angrily, and Jed scowled at him, her hand never wavering from Zim.
"MAX!" she snapped, "Take that defective tin can outside, destroy it and get the "Drill A House" device. We'll kill these two and go find ourselves a suitable spot where we can begin our destruction."
"This is my planet!" Zim protested, "GIR! GIR, defensive-" he was cut off by a warning flick of the gun, and his mouth snapped shut, and Dib could feel him seething with rage beside him. MAX urged GIR outside, who was sad to leave his popcorn.
"I wouldn't advise it, Invader," she snarled. Even though her voice was filled with hatred she still remained respectful to his title, which Dib found strange yet remarkable. He had always seen Irkens as unemotional dirt bags, but maybe that was just Zim, "You'd be dead before you realised I'd pulled the trigger. Now why don't you just shut up and appreciate the last few moments you live. And before you disagree, that's not a request."
Dib didn't think Zim's frown could lower itself anymore but it did, and the Irken hostage looked on at his opponent with utter contempt and loathing.
"You'd not be so cocky if I was holding a similar weapon instead of being treated like a dog by a coward!" Zim yelled, unable to keep himself from telling this girl exactly what he thought of her, "The COWARD that you are, miserable TRAITORESS!"
"Yeah, well you know what Zim, you're not holding a weapon, so just shut the Hell up, okay?" Invader Jed snapped, and Zim retook his position as the helpless prisoner, Dib knowing full well how much he hated the situation. He wasn't really enjoying himself much either, though. The female Irken looked thoughtful for a few moments, her eyes boring into Zim's, who gave her an equally as steady glare, before she broke away and continued looking straight at his forehead. There was a slight waver in her voice the next time she spoke, "You know, Invader, I've been waiting a long time for this moment."
Zim growled again, and Dib felt his throat run dry. This was it. She was going to shoot Zim, and then she was going to kill Dib simply because he was there and had heard too much, or whatever the reason was. He had never had a chance to tell his dad he didn't really hate him, or tell Gaz that he liked her for who she was, even if that was an evil pizza-obsessed maniac. This Jed character wasn't going to kill Dib with the same thought as she was going to do to Zim, she was just going to shoot him without a word, then leave them to rot together on the sofa while she doomed mankind. Oh well, at least it wouldn't be Zim's victory over Earth.
"Is that so?" Zim asked, but his voice had the tone that told her he didn't really care, but that he wanted her to either get it over with or shoot herself because that was how much he hated her.
"It is," Jed replied, "And I'm sorry you feel so helplessly obliged to loathe me after we'd never been properly acquainted."
"You personally have no reason to hate me, I didn't send you off into the depths of space!" Zim objected, "And I don't see why you can't steal your own planet."
"Well it's not going to be any use to you if you're dead, is it Zim? What use is a mission if you're lying in a grave rotting to nothing?" she spoke bitterly and coldly for a young-looking Irken, and Dib wondered if Zim showed the inciest bit of remorse in his eyes. There was a flash of something, whether it had been sorrow or regret that he had never been able to destroy the humans, or the helpless feeling of anger that he was going to be killed like this. If Dib hadn't been so worried about his own life, he would almost have felt sorry for Zim, sitting next to him with the gun pointed directly at his head.
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"Fly, birdie fly, up in the sky, with a one!" Swinging up into the air, Dib giggled, "And a two!" Another swing, higher and higher, "And a threeee!" Dib flew higher than he ever had, yet gravity defied him and he fell down onto the soft cushion of his mother, who let herself drop backwards onto the soft, bouncy grass and bring his three-year-old self on top of her.
"Mommy!" Dib shrieked happily, playing with her facial features, "Do it that again!"
His mother laughed pleasantly and shook her head, her hair mingling with the fresh spring daisies. He tangled her hair up with his pudgy hands and she sat up, still laughing.
"I think you've had enough flying today, young man!" she told him, pulling him off of her and planting him on the grass, "We wouldn't want you to get air sickness, and I can hear little Gaz crying. I'd better go and see to her, hmm?"
Dib sat on the grass and watched his mother walk inside with a bounce in her step. The happy dreams that were his early years hadn't lasted long after that.
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When he had first seen the gun, Zim didn't know how he should react. This intruder had pointed it first at Dib, which was fine; his initial reaction was that perhaps this Irken was a rather clumsy reinforcement to help him defeat the humans. But then she had the look on her face that told him she had made a mistake, and she had swung the gun to face him. That had been when Zim's organs had frozen and his body turned cold.
Now he was sitting on the couch, waiting for this Invader to get bored of talking and shoot him, which he was beginning to wish she would hurry up and do. She was taunting him, her red eyes flickering teasingly, the gun dancing before him. He could try and fight her, but he believed her word, that she wouldn't hesitate to shoot him. Oh how he wished he had a gun in his pak. He knew exactly where his one was, a similar model to the one she held at him now. The gun was down in Store Room #2 where he had been using it to shoot cans of HUMAN WORM BEANS as target practice. He was a good shot and wouldn't miss her if he were in the position to shoot her.
Whether he would miss Earth or not was a big thing to decide. He would miss hating it, plotting to destroy it and wishing it to be DOOMED to infinity. He would miss his Toaster idea, it was nearly finished. Sure it wasn't his world conquest plan, more for his enjoyment than anything else. It would have been fun, firing the organic sweep. But now this . . . Invader . . . was going to take it all away and use her sister's plan which he had so cleverly foiled. He had no regrets in how he had dealt with Tak so wasn't about to apologise, not that he would anyway, being a proud Irken and all. Another thing . . . he would have liked to speak to Fia once more too.
Zim looked to Dib, who was already looking at him. Their eyes met and held, and Zim saw markings of tears in the adolescent human's eyes. Zim supposed he was looking back on his short life, like he himself was. He had wanted to be the High Invader, but supposed now he never would. Was he on his way to this "Heaven" humans spoke of, or would he become nothing more than a dead organic mass he had always been taught would happen when he stopped living?
Zim swallowed and looked away from Dib, his nemesis, and his matched rival. After these few years, he had never been able to defeat him.
"Goodbye, Dib-Stink," he mumbled under his breath.
"Goodbye, Zim," Dib replied, his voice cracked, "See you in Hell."
Zim nodded and looked back at the gun, ready for fire. She had a steady hand, the new Invader that was to be his and the Earth's end, he gave her that. She reminded him a little of Fia, in fact, when he thought about it. She wasn't as tall or had anything of Fia's grace, but there was just the air around them both that was similar. How strange Zim had become because of living here on Earth. How weird it all seemed, that one day everything was normal, and then your human rival comes and tells you a ship is going to crash into your base, destroying your Voot. Next thing you know you're being held in your own home with a stranger telling you she's come to kill you.
Strange how things changed so quickly, and Zim realised that no one really cared. One thing he also would have liked to have done, was to buy GIR one last taco.
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"BANG!" Zim roared, "BANG, you're DEAD! DEAAAD!"
He began rolling on the ground laughing manically, and his friend stalked over to him and waved her hand over his face, a little concernedly.
"Zim?" she asked, "Zim, are you okay . . . you're acting weird . . . "
"Nonsense!" Zim laughed, and this time Fia joined in. They resumed their fighting positions, toy guns poised, until the older assigned brother of Zim's friend swooped in and stole his gun. Zim looked up at Fia's purple- eyed brother and tried not to frown, Fia had said that he would one day be Almighty Tallest and Zim didn't want to anger the Tallest.
"Hey, shorty!" Fia's brother laughed, waving the gun in front of him teasingly, "Can you reach it? Huh? Huh?" He chewed on a burrito as he spoke, which spat out of his mouth and crumbs landed on Zim's face. Zim didn't say anything and looked at the elder brother of his only friend.
Fia snatched it off him swiftly, and he stalked back inside reluctantly. Zim and Fia regarded each other and looked away awkwardly. This had been Zim's only encounter of kindness and had found it hard to believe, and didn't know how to react. He was always being made fun of for being short, but he didn't care because he was going to be better than everyone. He was going to be an Invader.
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Snapping back into reality, Zim realised his eyes were pricking with what humans called tears. Having no experience of these things, and not wishing to, the Invader turned away, then remembered he was at gunpoint.
"No sudden movements, Zim," Invader Jed warned, "It won't be long now. I can see you beginning to suffer under the strain."
"Never," Zim whispered hoarsely, practically spitting. Dib had never seen Zim so quiet and angry, and was almost willing him to start ranting and raving and going crazy. This loathing silence was horrible and Dib wished it all to be over soon. Zim, however, was having second thoughts about dying, but there was nothing to be done.
"Very well," Jed shrugged, "Goodbye . . . Invader Zim."
She saluted him, and refocused the gun to Zim's head. She took a step forward so they were quite near, and Zim felt his mind tell him, 'Not today, Zim. You don't die today. This is not your time.'
Zim inhaled deeply and gave the intruder his most hating look that he normally reserved for Dib.
Suddenly, without realising what he was doing or how it sprung to his mind, Zim thought of Gaz, and noticed he had never really decided what he felt for her. 'Goodbye, Gaz,' he said silently, and waited for the impact.
At that precise moment, GIR came zooming in with a huge grin on his robotic face. MAX sprinted in after him and attempted to wrestle him to the ground. Invader Jed dropped her guard for a moment and Zim started to move but she motioned him back down into his seat before he could attack. Suddenly he noticed something that looked vaguely familiar in GIR's hand, and within a flash it was gone, inside the stupid robot's mouth and swallowed into the abdomen apartment.
"Goodbye, GIR," Zim said, with a hint of fondness in his cracked voice.
"AARGH!" Invader Jed yelled suddenly, "You little . . . "
She looked like she wanted to move over to GIR, but that would be giving Zim time to attack her and steal her gun, which she was full aware he could do. She kept as much attention as possible on Zim and the human thing next to him, but that little demon . . .
"He . . . just ate my Drill A House device!" she hacked, and a wide grin spread across Zim's face, "Don't look so smug!"
She pressed the gun right against his forehead and tightened the pressure on the trigger, but Zim cried out.
"Wait a second!" he ordered, and she looked very surprised. GIR stood motionless, MAX poised and ready to strike. Dib just looked on, his eyes wide and terrified.
"What?" Jed snapped, angry enough, "I may not have a base but I can still destroy you!"
"And be stranded here?" Zim queried, and Dib suddenly noticed his plan, and his heart skipped a beat.
"Wh-what?" this Invader may be very confident, but she was still young and inexperienced.
"Think about it, if YOUR device is broken, and your Voot and my Voot are both in need for repair, then WHAT HOPE IN THIS UNIVERSE have you of possibly having any resources to take over this planet?" Zim analysed, but she still looked confused so he obliged, if it meant he may get to stay alive, "How are you going to operate the repair bay and all the equipment if you don't have a base?"
"I'll - I'll use yours!" Jed laughed, but Zim shook his head, chuckling at her slightly. She didn't like that, and tipped his chin up with the gun now to his throat. Zim swallowed and carried on.
"My Computer obeys my voice only. The commands of any other life form will be denied without exception, unless I program the Computer to accept those commands." Zim saw the look in her eye, "And I am not going to allow my base to work under your orders."
Invader Jed looked completely devastated, "Well, what . . . what do I do?"
Zim was surprised, as was Dib. Neither had expected her to ask Zim, whom she had come to kill, for help. Yet here it was, and Zim looked both happy he wasn't going to die and also quite annoyed that this Irken Invader that had been so sure and confident minutes before was now faltering.
"Well, you could either kill me, and remain stranded here, trying to use one of the human shuttles to get back to the Armada, which I very much doubt these slow in technology beings' spaceships are capable of, or we could come to a compromise." Zim looked at her, letting her know he would much more prefer the latter.
Invader Jed nodded and swallowed, still not lowering her gun. Her SIR Unit giggled briefly, and GIR joined in with a chorus of manic laughter. Dib supposed this was robot bonding. Zim stared hard at the intruding Irken, and she bore her eyes right back into his. Suddenly, she chuckled.
"I'd love to hear what Tak would do," she murmured, "She was always so sure, and I'm . . . "
Zim didn't say anything, he didn't want to provoke her by saying that her sister was a power-ridden evil beast monkey that would have rather killed Zim and be stranded than join forces with him, and Zim and Dib shared a brief glance which told them that they were both sharing the same train of thought.
Jed, meanwhile, was looking very uncertain, but eventually her face told them she had made a decision.
"What would this compromise go like?" she asked unprofessionally, but Zim didn't comment on it, she was still pointing that gun at his throat, keeping his chin up. He was getting cramp in the back of his neck.
"Well, PERHAPS a temporary peace treaty in which you let me go, and I let you stay here, and neither of us try to kill each other no matter how much we both want to. We keep it strictly business, no personal . . . ness, and NO DANCE OR POP MUSIC!" Zim roared, and Jed blinked, "And then, once my base and both our Voots are repaired, and once you have settled yourself and your gadgets, we can discuss our plans and how to settle this killing business."
Jed looked unsure, and Zim really hoped she wasn't a dance music fan. Or pop . . . Zim moved his eyes, as he couldn't move his head, over to GIR, who was playing a rather vigorous game of chess with MAX. He looked at Dib, who looked almost grateful, then back at Jed, who eventually nodded.
"Alright," she said, "But just until I get settled, then I'll kill you."
"Not if I kill you first . . . now, you really need to take this GUN from my INGENIOUS NECK now. Now, do it, do it now, do it. Now you will do it now . . . do it . . . " Zim promised, with a little waver at the end.
Jed removed the gun and Zim leapt to his feet, and the young Invader stood back. Zim stood slightly taller than her due to his artificial height, and Dib also stood up, mouth slightly open in disbelief.
"So . . . we're not going to die, then?" Dib asked, breathing very quickly, and Zim shook his head.
"Not today, Dib-Stink," he replied, and without another word, Dib rushed out of the door to the night streets. Zim and Jed regarded each other, and Zim put out his hand. Jed looked at it suspiciously.
"It's a tradition humans have," he explained, "To confirm DIRTY deals and treaties like this COMPROMISE OF DOOOOOM!"
Jed nodded, and took his hand without another word.
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A/N: Woof! I mean . . . dude . . . hee. That was a very fun chapter to write, but I'm really enjoying writing this story. Man I'm on a roll. I DON'T WANNA STOPPP! Meep!
Keep reviewing folks! I do like to read 'em I do . . . Mmyep.
So . . . what do you think of Jed? Is she a good addition to the story? Do you not know her well enough yet but think she may grow on you? Do you think she is a no-no? WELL IT DOESN'T MATTER DOES IT!?!??!
Nah I'm just kidding, if there's anyway you think I can improve I am really only too happy to hear what you guys have to say, in fact I encourage it. Just don't eat me, okay guys? Meep! I don't like being eaten on Sundays! Or Sundees.
Meep.
I say that too much, huh?
Okay . . . going to bed now . . .
Review.
"I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black." - Heart-Shaped Box, Nirvana.
Author's Note : I love Evanescence! Not as much as Nirvana but they rock too. Amy Lee has the coolest clothes! Going to restrict my Author's Note this time. Meep! Okay . . . this chapter is going to have Dib and Zim meeting Invader Jed. The two slave bots will bond, but will Jed kill Zim or vice versa? Dun dun DUNN! Hee.
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- Chapter Seventeen - Assassin -
The smoke parted, Dib and Zim stared on in horror, while GIR simply stood and "oooooed!" at it. An Irken possibly just slightly smaller than Zim's artificial height (Yay someone smaller than Zim!) emerged, with a robot stood by her side looking quite serious. As the debris settled and the small fire that was result of the collision had burnt itself out, the character jumped off the roof with the two smashed Voot Cruisers and landed like a cat on all fours, then stood up straight. Her SIR unit hopped down next to her and stood vigilant.
"T-Tak?" Zim stammered in disbelief, and the other Irken smiled nastily, then shook her head.
Zim's jaw dropped, and as Dib had already seen what was coming he wasn't as surprised, but it wasn't exactly the most subtle landing. Without a word from any of the figures standing on the lawn, the new arrival pulled out a laser gun, which was slightly larger than a pistol and pointed it at Dib, who cried out. Zim grinned evilly, but his eyes froze when she looked as if she'd made a careless mistake, and swiveled the gun to point at the male Irken's head.
"Inside," she growled, tilting the gun forcing Zim inside. Dib followed, and the Irken didn't object to this nosy inhabitant of the planet doing so. GIR and the female Irken's robot came in closely behind, MAX closing the door behind all of them. GIR sat on the rug and whipped out a box of popcorn, sitting like a teddybear with the box between his legs that weren't even attached to himself anyway. The Irken and her robot stood in front of the TV and the female kept her eye firmly set on Zim's, who stared at her in fury and confusion.
"What is the meaning of this?" Zim demanded, his hands clenched in fists against the sofa, furious at being treated as a prisoner in his own home, especially by one of his own kind. Dib looked sideways and understood Zim's frustration, and was very glad that this Irken assassin was no longer pointing that nasty looking gun at him. He was still beginning to wish he hadn't followed them inside the house, because thinking on it that was probably quite a stupid thing to do.
"You're not in control here, Invader Zim," the young Irken reminded him, "I am."
Zim growled at her, his eyes very narrow. Hers were angry and focused, a look Dib thought looked like she had wanted to point her gun at Zim for quite a while. He supposed it was because this Irken was Tak's 'sister' and was seeking revenge. Looking again at his enemy, he realised that Zim wasn't sure who this was, and he, like Dib had originally thought, that this was indeed Tak herself.
"And it looks like I'll be in control from now on," the intruder snarled, pushing a button which Dib figured must be the equivalent to the safety on human guns and tightening a grip on the shiny black handle, the barrel aimed right at Zim's head.
"What is this?" Zim snapped, "Who are you?"
The Irken smiled wryly.
"My name is Invader -"
"Who are you?!"
"My name is Invader -"
"Who are you?!"
"My name is Invader Jed. I have been training on Devastis for the past three years, having drilled into my mind: To seek my revenge on you, Zim. Well, actually, my sister's revenge, I'm just performing her wrath via myself, who will then take up her plan to turn the Earth into a big box of snacks. A round box . . . of snacks." She replied obligingly, with the same evil voice Zim wielded, except hers was slightly softer, less intense.
"What do you mean?" Zim still didn't understand, "What revenge? Who's your sister?"
Invader Jed laughed and Zim flinched a little. "You haven't twigged yet, Zim? My sister is Tak, who you ejected into space in a Voot Cruiser emergency pod. I was planning on setting up my base first and choosing a disguise, but it looks like I'm just going to have to kill you now and do all that later, thanks to my Voot going a little insane on me. I guess you're lucky in a way, Zim. The gun will be quick. What I had in plan for you was slow and horrible. Oh well."
She pressed another button, probably a second safety. She put one of her two fingers on the trigger, preparing to pull and destroy her rival.
"Meeow!" GIR shrieked angrily, and Jed scowled at him, her hand never wavering from Zim.
"MAX!" she snapped, "Take that defective tin can outside, destroy it and get the "Drill A House" device. We'll kill these two and go find ourselves a suitable spot where we can begin our destruction."
"This is my planet!" Zim protested, "GIR! GIR, defensive-" he was cut off by a warning flick of the gun, and his mouth snapped shut, and Dib could feel him seething with rage beside him. MAX urged GIR outside, who was sad to leave his popcorn.
"I wouldn't advise it, Invader," she snarled. Even though her voice was filled with hatred she still remained respectful to his title, which Dib found strange yet remarkable. He had always seen Irkens as unemotional dirt bags, but maybe that was just Zim, "You'd be dead before you realised I'd pulled the trigger. Now why don't you just shut up and appreciate the last few moments you live. And before you disagree, that's not a request."
Dib didn't think Zim's frown could lower itself anymore but it did, and the Irken hostage looked on at his opponent with utter contempt and loathing.
"You'd not be so cocky if I was holding a similar weapon instead of being treated like a dog by a coward!" Zim yelled, unable to keep himself from telling this girl exactly what he thought of her, "The COWARD that you are, miserable TRAITORESS!"
"Yeah, well you know what Zim, you're not holding a weapon, so just shut the Hell up, okay?" Invader Jed snapped, and Zim retook his position as the helpless prisoner, Dib knowing full well how much he hated the situation. He wasn't really enjoying himself much either, though. The female Irken looked thoughtful for a few moments, her eyes boring into Zim's, who gave her an equally as steady glare, before she broke away and continued looking straight at his forehead. There was a slight waver in her voice the next time she spoke, "You know, Invader, I've been waiting a long time for this moment."
Zim growled again, and Dib felt his throat run dry. This was it. She was going to shoot Zim, and then she was going to kill Dib simply because he was there and had heard too much, or whatever the reason was. He had never had a chance to tell his dad he didn't really hate him, or tell Gaz that he liked her for who she was, even if that was an evil pizza-obsessed maniac. This Jed character wasn't going to kill Dib with the same thought as she was going to do to Zim, she was just going to shoot him without a word, then leave them to rot together on the sofa while she doomed mankind. Oh well, at least it wouldn't be Zim's victory over Earth.
"Is that so?" Zim asked, but his voice had the tone that told her he didn't really care, but that he wanted her to either get it over with or shoot herself because that was how much he hated her.
"It is," Jed replied, "And I'm sorry you feel so helplessly obliged to loathe me after we'd never been properly acquainted."
"You personally have no reason to hate me, I didn't send you off into the depths of space!" Zim objected, "And I don't see why you can't steal your own planet."
"Well it's not going to be any use to you if you're dead, is it Zim? What use is a mission if you're lying in a grave rotting to nothing?" she spoke bitterly and coldly for a young-looking Irken, and Dib wondered if Zim showed the inciest bit of remorse in his eyes. There was a flash of something, whether it had been sorrow or regret that he had never been able to destroy the humans, or the helpless feeling of anger that he was going to be killed like this. If Dib hadn't been so worried about his own life, he would almost have felt sorry for Zim, sitting next to him with the gun pointed directly at his head.
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"Fly, birdie fly, up in the sky, with a one!" Swinging up into the air, Dib giggled, "And a two!" Another swing, higher and higher, "And a threeee!" Dib flew higher than he ever had, yet gravity defied him and he fell down onto the soft cushion of his mother, who let herself drop backwards onto the soft, bouncy grass and bring his three-year-old self on top of her.
"Mommy!" Dib shrieked happily, playing with her facial features, "Do it that again!"
His mother laughed pleasantly and shook her head, her hair mingling with the fresh spring daisies. He tangled her hair up with his pudgy hands and she sat up, still laughing.
"I think you've had enough flying today, young man!" she told him, pulling him off of her and planting him on the grass, "We wouldn't want you to get air sickness, and I can hear little Gaz crying. I'd better go and see to her, hmm?"
Dib sat on the grass and watched his mother walk inside with a bounce in her step. The happy dreams that were his early years hadn't lasted long after that.
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When he had first seen the gun, Zim didn't know how he should react. This intruder had pointed it first at Dib, which was fine; his initial reaction was that perhaps this Irken was a rather clumsy reinforcement to help him defeat the humans. But then she had the look on her face that told him she had made a mistake, and she had swung the gun to face him. That had been when Zim's organs had frozen and his body turned cold.
Now he was sitting on the couch, waiting for this Invader to get bored of talking and shoot him, which he was beginning to wish she would hurry up and do. She was taunting him, her red eyes flickering teasingly, the gun dancing before him. He could try and fight her, but he believed her word, that she wouldn't hesitate to shoot him. Oh how he wished he had a gun in his pak. He knew exactly where his one was, a similar model to the one she held at him now. The gun was down in Store Room #2 where he had been using it to shoot cans of HUMAN WORM BEANS as target practice. He was a good shot and wouldn't miss her if he were in the position to shoot her.
Whether he would miss Earth or not was a big thing to decide. He would miss hating it, plotting to destroy it and wishing it to be DOOMED to infinity. He would miss his Toaster idea, it was nearly finished. Sure it wasn't his world conquest plan, more for his enjoyment than anything else. It would have been fun, firing the organic sweep. But now this . . . Invader . . . was going to take it all away and use her sister's plan which he had so cleverly foiled. He had no regrets in how he had dealt with Tak so wasn't about to apologise, not that he would anyway, being a proud Irken and all. Another thing . . . he would have liked to speak to Fia once more too.
Zim looked to Dib, who was already looking at him. Their eyes met and held, and Zim saw markings of tears in the adolescent human's eyes. Zim supposed he was looking back on his short life, like he himself was. He had wanted to be the High Invader, but supposed now he never would. Was he on his way to this "Heaven" humans spoke of, or would he become nothing more than a dead organic mass he had always been taught would happen when he stopped living?
Zim swallowed and looked away from Dib, his nemesis, and his matched rival. After these few years, he had never been able to defeat him.
"Goodbye, Dib-Stink," he mumbled under his breath.
"Goodbye, Zim," Dib replied, his voice cracked, "See you in Hell."
Zim nodded and looked back at the gun, ready for fire. She had a steady hand, the new Invader that was to be his and the Earth's end, he gave her that. She reminded him a little of Fia, in fact, when he thought about it. She wasn't as tall or had anything of Fia's grace, but there was just the air around them both that was similar. How strange Zim had become because of living here on Earth. How weird it all seemed, that one day everything was normal, and then your human rival comes and tells you a ship is going to crash into your base, destroying your Voot. Next thing you know you're being held in your own home with a stranger telling you she's come to kill you.
Strange how things changed so quickly, and Zim realised that no one really cared. One thing he also would have liked to have done, was to buy GIR one last taco.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
"BANG!" Zim roared, "BANG, you're DEAD! DEAAAD!"
He began rolling on the ground laughing manically, and his friend stalked over to him and waved her hand over his face, a little concernedly.
"Zim?" she asked, "Zim, are you okay . . . you're acting weird . . . "
"Nonsense!" Zim laughed, and this time Fia joined in. They resumed their fighting positions, toy guns poised, until the older assigned brother of Zim's friend swooped in and stole his gun. Zim looked up at Fia's purple- eyed brother and tried not to frown, Fia had said that he would one day be Almighty Tallest and Zim didn't want to anger the Tallest.
"Hey, shorty!" Fia's brother laughed, waving the gun in front of him teasingly, "Can you reach it? Huh? Huh?" He chewed on a burrito as he spoke, which spat out of his mouth and crumbs landed on Zim's face. Zim didn't say anything and looked at the elder brother of his only friend.
Fia snatched it off him swiftly, and he stalked back inside reluctantly. Zim and Fia regarded each other and looked away awkwardly. This had been Zim's only encounter of kindness and had found it hard to believe, and didn't know how to react. He was always being made fun of for being short, but he didn't care because he was going to be better than everyone. He was going to be an Invader.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Snapping back into reality, Zim realised his eyes were pricking with what humans called tears. Having no experience of these things, and not wishing to, the Invader turned away, then remembered he was at gunpoint.
"No sudden movements, Zim," Invader Jed warned, "It won't be long now. I can see you beginning to suffer under the strain."
"Never," Zim whispered hoarsely, practically spitting. Dib had never seen Zim so quiet and angry, and was almost willing him to start ranting and raving and going crazy. This loathing silence was horrible and Dib wished it all to be over soon. Zim, however, was having second thoughts about dying, but there was nothing to be done.
"Very well," Jed shrugged, "Goodbye . . . Invader Zim."
She saluted him, and refocused the gun to Zim's head. She took a step forward so they were quite near, and Zim felt his mind tell him, 'Not today, Zim. You don't die today. This is not your time.'
Zim inhaled deeply and gave the intruder his most hating look that he normally reserved for Dib.
Suddenly, without realising what he was doing or how it sprung to his mind, Zim thought of Gaz, and noticed he had never really decided what he felt for her. 'Goodbye, Gaz,' he said silently, and waited for the impact.
At that precise moment, GIR came zooming in with a huge grin on his robotic face. MAX sprinted in after him and attempted to wrestle him to the ground. Invader Jed dropped her guard for a moment and Zim started to move but she motioned him back down into his seat before he could attack. Suddenly he noticed something that looked vaguely familiar in GIR's hand, and within a flash it was gone, inside the stupid robot's mouth and swallowed into the abdomen apartment.
"Goodbye, GIR," Zim said, with a hint of fondness in his cracked voice.
"AARGH!" Invader Jed yelled suddenly, "You little . . . "
She looked like she wanted to move over to GIR, but that would be giving Zim time to attack her and steal her gun, which she was full aware he could do. She kept as much attention as possible on Zim and the human thing next to him, but that little demon . . .
"He . . . just ate my Drill A House device!" she hacked, and a wide grin spread across Zim's face, "Don't look so smug!"
She pressed the gun right against his forehead and tightened the pressure on the trigger, but Zim cried out.
"Wait a second!" he ordered, and she looked very surprised. GIR stood motionless, MAX poised and ready to strike. Dib just looked on, his eyes wide and terrified.
"What?" Jed snapped, angry enough, "I may not have a base but I can still destroy you!"
"And be stranded here?" Zim queried, and Dib suddenly noticed his plan, and his heart skipped a beat.
"Wh-what?" this Invader may be very confident, but she was still young and inexperienced.
"Think about it, if YOUR device is broken, and your Voot and my Voot are both in need for repair, then WHAT HOPE IN THIS UNIVERSE have you of possibly having any resources to take over this planet?" Zim analysed, but she still looked confused so he obliged, if it meant he may get to stay alive, "How are you going to operate the repair bay and all the equipment if you don't have a base?"
"I'll - I'll use yours!" Jed laughed, but Zim shook his head, chuckling at her slightly. She didn't like that, and tipped his chin up with the gun now to his throat. Zim swallowed and carried on.
"My Computer obeys my voice only. The commands of any other life form will be denied without exception, unless I program the Computer to accept those commands." Zim saw the look in her eye, "And I am not going to allow my base to work under your orders."
Invader Jed looked completely devastated, "Well, what . . . what do I do?"
Zim was surprised, as was Dib. Neither had expected her to ask Zim, whom she had come to kill, for help. Yet here it was, and Zim looked both happy he wasn't going to die and also quite annoyed that this Irken Invader that had been so sure and confident minutes before was now faltering.
"Well, you could either kill me, and remain stranded here, trying to use one of the human shuttles to get back to the Armada, which I very much doubt these slow in technology beings' spaceships are capable of, or we could come to a compromise." Zim looked at her, letting her know he would much more prefer the latter.
Invader Jed nodded and swallowed, still not lowering her gun. Her SIR Unit giggled briefly, and GIR joined in with a chorus of manic laughter. Dib supposed this was robot bonding. Zim stared hard at the intruding Irken, and she bore her eyes right back into his. Suddenly, she chuckled.
"I'd love to hear what Tak would do," she murmured, "She was always so sure, and I'm . . . "
Zim didn't say anything, he didn't want to provoke her by saying that her sister was a power-ridden evil beast monkey that would have rather killed Zim and be stranded than join forces with him, and Zim and Dib shared a brief glance which told them that they were both sharing the same train of thought.
Jed, meanwhile, was looking very uncertain, but eventually her face told them she had made a decision.
"What would this compromise go like?" she asked unprofessionally, but Zim didn't comment on it, she was still pointing that gun at his throat, keeping his chin up. He was getting cramp in the back of his neck.
"Well, PERHAPS a temporary peace treaty in which you let me go, and I let you stay here, and neither of us try to kill each other no matter how much we both want to. We keep it strictly business, no personal . . . ness, and NO DANCE OR POP MUSIC!" Zim roared, and Jed blinked, "And then, once my base and both our Voots are repaired, and once you have settled yourself and your gadgets, we can discuss our plans and how to settle this killing business."
Jed looked unsure, and Zim really hoped she wasn't a dance music fan. Or pop . . . Zim moved his eyes, as he couldn't move his head, over to GIR, who was playing a rather vigorous game of chess with MAX. He looked at Dib, who looked almost grateful, then back at Jed, who eventually nodded.
"Alright," she said, "But just until I get settled, then I'll kill you."
"Not if I kill you first . . . now, you really need to take this GUN from my INGENIOUS NECK now. Now, do it, do it now, do it. Now you will do it now . . . do it . . . " Zim promised, with a little waver at the end.
Jed removed the gun and Zim leapt to his feet, and the young Invader stood back. Zim stood slightly taller than her due to his artificial height, and Dib also stood up, mouth slightly open in disbelief.
"So . . . we're not going to die, then?" Dib asked, breathing very quickly, and Zim shook his head.
"Not today, Dib-Stink," he replied, and without another word, Dib rushed out of the door to the night streets. Zim and Jed regarded each other, and Zim put out his hand. Jed looked at it suspiciously.
"It's a tradition humans have," he explained, "To confirm DIRTY deals and treaties like this COMPROMISE OF DOOOOOM!"
Jed nodded, and took his hand without another word.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
A/N: Woof! I mean . . . dude . . . hee. That was a very fun chapter to write, but I'm really enjoying writing this story. Man I'm on a roll. I DON'T WANNA STOPPP! Meep!
Keep reviewing folks! I do like to read 'em I do . . . Mmyep.
So . . . what do you think of Jed? Is she a good addition to the story? Do you not know her well enough yet but think she may grow on you? Do you think she is a no-no? WELL IT DOESN'T MATTER DOES IT!?!??!
Nah I'm just kidding, if there's anyway you think I can improve I am really only too happy to hear what you guys have to say, in fact I encourage it. Just don't eat me, okay guys? Meep! I don't like being eaten on Sundays! Or Sundees.
Meep.
I say that too much, huh?
Okay . . . going to bed now . . .
Review.
"I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black." - Heart-Shaped Box, Nirvana.
