Summary: Hermione seeks comfort and finds it in the least expected place. Everything changes and she can't cope on her own any longer – Who shall she turn to?
Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, don't own Harry Potter or anything related to the books or films (which are evil personified!), that is JK. Rowling's envious delight!
Author's Note: Ahem, another edit of the chapters, I'm just trying to make them look better and whatnot. The plot and name has changed this was once called "Sweetest Sins" But I didn't think it fitted any longer. This is a Draco/Hermione fic, but they won't just find love straight away although it may seem like it. Love isn't that easy.  For some reason I can't get the title and chapter bit to go in the center, if anyone knows how to correct this I would be grateful for their help.


Flying On Feathered Wings
 Chapter 1: Looking back

Snow had fallen for the past week, never letting up apart from odd moments during the night. It swept over Hogwarts leaving it shrouded in a glorious white cloak. Hermione sat with her legs up to her chest in her favorite place, the library. To her it was an escape, and no matter what happened in the real world she could always come here and submerge herself into the world within the pages which she read. She and Ron had had a fight again, who knows what over though, not even she could remember. She sighed looking out into the blizzard which clouded her vision, as an emotional blizzard stirred up emotion within her, hurt, confusion, pain, a pang of loneliness.

Over the summer Hermione had changed drastically, not only physically but emotionally, and personality wise. The Hermione which had gone home last year, wasn't the one which now sat hidden in the shadows, cold tears snaking down her face. Her hair was no longer bushy and unruly; it now did as it should and twirled down her back in golden curls. She was no longer short and stick thin, she'd filled up and out, gaining curves which any girl would be envious of. She was still the book worm of Hogwarts, but she no longer hid behind her books like she used. She had become more confident over the summer, no longer was she just the bookworm, information finder of the Golden Trio as they were called around Hogwarts. No she was much more then that now. But what was she really? She still escaped to her books, but now she could handle her own, not needing to run to Harry or Ron. Especially not Ron. Scowling at the window she brushed away the tears which had started to dry on her cheek. She returned to her book, getting lost in the pages of fantasy as they opened new worlds to her.

A faint smile slowly crept over Hermione's face as she began to the finish the book, and once it was over she was feeling a little better. She loved romance, well no, she loved dark romance, summer had changed her. She stretched out and yawned, winching at the pain in her neck.

~ Flash back ~

"You're always too tired! What do you do when your not here Hermione?" Ron had snarled at her, his hair and face competing for the brightest red. Anger showed in his eyes as he glared down at her. "Who do you do when your not here?" He had viciously shouted at her, that last comment earning him a sharp slap.

"How dare you! You asshole…how fucking dare you!" Hermione had shouted back, snapping up from sitting on the couch in the luckily empty Gryffindor common room. "How dare you accuse me of cheating on you! You're the one who's running around behind my back. Don't act all fucking innocent with me Ron." Ron stared at her, surprised at her choice in words, you don't often hear Hermione swearing and her accusations.

"You know I'd never do that! Unlike you obviously, getting a little too defensive aint we? Your sending way too much bloody time not 'ere or in the bloody the library. Got somethin' to tell me? Who is it? Hmm, Hermione?" He had thrown the accusations at her as if it was just another conversation, as if it didn't really matter.

"You…you...bastard" She spat out at him, tears springing up in her eyes as she stalked out of the common room muttering and cursing as she goes.

~ End of flashback ~

"Bastard..." She murmured as she pushed her way through the double doors of the library then up to the Head prefects' common room. She had been ecstatic when she knew she was going to be head girl. It's what she'd always dreamed of. Head girl, Ron as her boyfriend, Harry as a best friend, brilliant grades and everyone knew her name. What more could a girl ask for? If she was still the old Hermione she'd of been in heaven…this Hermione was in hell. The summer had taken its toll on her drastically. What with one of her best friends committing suicide, leaving her alone most of the summer. It hadn't helped that the girl had been one of her only friends from primary. Tears welled up in her eyes as she thought of Katie, and how she had found her.

~ Flashback ~

Moonlight seeped in through the net curtains which fluttered out into the room, and over the girl which lay on the floor eyes staring unseeing at the ceiling. The light glittered innocently on the crimson liquid which pooled around her body.

"Katie?" Called a confident voice from outside the room, a soft knock on the door then it was pushed open no need for formalities. "Katie what are y—"the sentence was cut short as a gut wrenching scream left the girls throat. She dropped next to the girl, shaking hands pulling the limp form towards her.

"Mione? Are you ok dear?" Called Katie's mother. "Is everything ok?" Tears slid down Hermione's pale face as she looked down at one of her best friends. Dead in her arms. Blood covered her chest and arms where she held her close.

"Help…please no…don't let this happen!" she cried out, looking up at the sky as if to plead with the gods. "Bring her back you bastards!! Bring her back, she isn't ready!! She doesn't really want to go!" She screeched, sobs breaking her voice.

Katie's mother had run up the stairs moments before to see her daughter in Hermione's arms, obviously dead. She'd collapsed sobbing on the stairs.

"Oh my baby girl…not my baby…god no…" Was all she said as Hermione sat rocking her friend in a fierce hug.

"Bring her back" She sobbed into her hair "Just bring her back." Finally she noticed the notes clutched in the girls hand, one addressed to her the other to the family. Hermione picked up slowly, and then ripped it open.

Please don't cry for me Mione, I'm free now. Remember that I love you and thank you for everything.

A faint smile had been allowed to cross her features. I'm free now. The words kept going round and round in her head. Yes, yes you are Katie. I'll always remember you… She had been pried from Katie by the paramedics soon after that, note stashed in her pocket.

~ End of flashback ~

"Snivis" She muttered to the portrait which swung open obediently, allowing the girl to enter. She winced slightly as crying eyes fell on the one she shared the common room with.

"Aww is the mudblood crying?" The male sneered as he smirked at her, cold silver eyes glittering in the fire light.

"Shove off Malfoy" she frowned as she realized who she had got that sentence off…Ron. She growled viciously at her thoughts as she stormed into her room tears still streaming down her face. "Bastard!" She yelled before kicking the door closed, leaving who the out burst was directed to anonymous.

------

Chuckling softly Draco watched the sobbing girl storm into her room, head tilted slightly so silvery blond hair fell into matching silver eyes.

"Ooh…touched a nerve…" He announced to the near silent room, the only sound the crackling of the fire as it muttered quietly in the fireplace, it's heat and light flying around the room. He smirked as she kicked the door shut "Temper, Temper," He muttered with a shake of his head before returning to the book, which coincidently was the one Hermione had just finished, which lay open in his lap. Once again submerging himself into the pages he could no longer hear her sobbing, well he told himself he couldn't hear it, feel it stirring something inside him, the rousing emotion was so slight and silent that he didn't even notice it himself.

The summer had been rough on Draco in some ways, kind in others. Physically he had changed immensely, becoming even taller then he once was, but now it suited him. He was no longer the lanky awkward teenage he once was, now power, elegance, grace, and beauty showed in every movement, every stance, every look. He held sway over many people just because of the way he looked, women and men alike lusted after him and all too often he gave into them, well they thought he gave into them, in his mind he used them, abused them, just as he had been taught to. Quidditch had helped build the muscles which adorned his lithe body, rippling and tensing with every movement. He no longer slicked his hair back so perfectly; now he generally left the white blonde mane to fall gracefully around his face, creating a halo of white. Summer had taken a heavy toll on him mentally, changing his personality mostly. He was still proud, cold, cruel, big headed, and annoying but now he silently showed what he could be. What he could be was written in to every movement, every smile which, even for the briefest of movements, flicked across his lips, every look in his eye. He had changed but not every one noticed he had become an expert liar over the years; he was a Slytherin after all. He was happier, kinder, in some ways anyway, he was softer, with some, but less open, he was no longer immature and didn't throw so many punches. He was, slowly, learning to respect others, well not everyone. He still to some degree believed what his father had beat into him. Mudblood and muggles are bad, Voldemort good. Quite the contradiction really.

Frowning Draco lifted his head to stare at the door as if that was the cause of his growing no annoyance, but no in fact it was beyond the door which annoyed him, that pitiful sound which he could hear slowly drifting to him. He growled low before reaching for his wand, which was safely nestled in his pocket.

"Musicus" He muttered, the soft whisper of a females voice filled the room, calming him for a moment as they blocked out the sobbing of the girl in the next room. The sound which made him want to stand, made him want to go to her, hold her. As he blocked out the emotion, which once again reared its head, peering at him with interest before burying its-self.

"My wounds cry for the grave

My soul cries for deliverance

Will I be denied Christ?

Tourniquet

My suicide"

He had caught the end of the song, his head snapping up from his book as he glared at the door, some how he could hear her again. Groaning Draco dropped the heavy book on the table, which already was littered with books and paper mostly Hermione's. He sat wondering why the mess didn't bother him, wondering why it soothed him to see the jumble of work, scribbled notes and odds and ends which often littered her sofa or the small table which stood between the two. Silver eyes fell on a piece of paper which had floated to the floor, obviously being knocked off by the gust of wind the book had created once dropped, heavily, on to the table. Frowning he picked it up eyebrow raising when he took in what it was. A poem. By her.

Storm clouds brewing not letting up,

Trudge along, stumble not fall.

Numb hands even number heart.

Heart of hurt, broken soul.

This is how I kneel before you.

My soul silently weeping

A smile plastered on my face.

Laughter on my lips while my heart shudders with sobs.

Trying so hard, yet still failing.

Trying not to show you how I hurt.

I'm here though, that's what you want right?

So I'm not going to go away

If this is how you want me

This is how you'll have me

It's ok I can live like this.

With a clown smile and a weeping soul.

It's ok, I can still smile

It's ok, I'm used to lying

I'll hide it all shall I?

Just for you I'll hide it all

What you made me in to

What you made me feel

Pull the storm close

Use it to hide the steady stream of unfeeling tears

Tears escape me as does my laughter.

No sobs will weaken me not while your there.

Tears yes they'll always fall.

But I can live, I can survive.

Survive is what I'll have to do.

My life force isn't ready to spill like my tears.

Not for you anyway, I thought I loved you.

I was wrong.

A slight frown settled comfortably on his brow as he stared hard at her door. He knew it was about Ron, but why had she left it lying around? As if it was for him to read. Picking up the piece of scrap paper and his book he walked into his own room thinking about only her. He lounged in long moments filled with her, a new sort of worry, wondering why she didn't just leave him if she felt so bad with him. He hadn't realized it then, but the poem had opened up so much to him. He may never realize it that is tills it's gone.