Well, you clicked on this for no reason. There is no story here, nor will
there ever be. I'm going to delete all of them and never return to
fanfiction.net ever again............
APRIL FOOLS!!!
Did I scare ya? Huh, huh?
YAY! ANOTHER CHAPTER!!! I would like to say that the 'APA' idea belongs to one of mah friends. I was originally going to do just 'AA' but she said "Hey, why don't you do Alcoholic PIRATES Anonymous." And I was like, "OK." So there you go. Kudos to you Lora for the spiffy idea! *Whistles the starburst tune* (If any of you got that inside joke-thingy, I'd just like to let you know that you're a really big dork! :P lol.)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Sitting in a dark corner of 'The Drunken Swordfish's tavern at a small table, leaning against one arm and his head in his hand, Jack sighed discouragedly. He said, "the usual please," to the waitress who had come up to take his order. Closing his eyes he recalled angrily what had happened earlier that day. /I can't believe the are making me do this! They betrayed me! How dare they! I'm Captain Jack Sparrow! They can't do this! I'm the terror of the seven bloody seas!/ The waitress placed the mug on the table and Jack looked down at it with a relieved expression. /Well, at least I still have me rum.../ He picked it up and took a long drink from it, his thoughts elsewhere so he failed to hear the jingling of the bells that rang when the pub door was opened. He didn't hear the foot steps approaching and only realized someone was there when they slammed their hand down onto the table forcefully, causing a big sound and announcing their presence.
"SO Jack!" Will said loudly and quickly, "How's APA goin' for ya?"
Scaring the living daylights out of Jack, he sprayed some of the rum out of his mouth, and choked on the rest.
Jack coughed into his fist while he spoke in a hoarsed voice. "*cough- cough* Don't--*cough* don't SCARE me like that! *cough-cough*" he tried to hiss through coughing fits.
Will looked down at the ominous looking liquid in Jack's mug. Knowing full well what it really was he asked, "Jack? What is that? It better not be rum..."
"Uh... it's um...apple juice?" He said as more of a question than an answer.
"Well then, I'm sure you won't mind if I have some, since it's just apple juice, right?" Will said smugly, reaching for the cup.
"Well, actually, I um...I..." Jack stuttered, trying to think of an excuse. He leapt up and waved his arms frantically. "WILL! Wait stop! Don't drink it!"
Will stopped, it was almost at his mouth, but lowered it back down again, still holding on. "What? Why not?" He narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Jack. "If it's just apple juice, why can't I drink it?"
Jack nervously looked around for another excuse to get him to not drink it. This was too much stress for the poor pirate! His mind couldn't function properly.
"Because!...ah, erm... it's...uh..." He had a brilliant idea! Well, it seemed brilliant to him at the time, anyway. He reached his hand up and smacked the rum out of Will's hand, spilling it all over the floor. "Oh! Look at that Will! Ya spilled it you clumsy boy!"
Will glared daggers at him, his eyes now mere slits. Jack laughed nervously and grinned with exaggerated airs. "Heheheheh... let me go get ya another one..." and he quickly scurried off. Will sat down at the table and watched him leave. And he really did leave. Will drummed his fingers on the table in annoyance as he watched his pirate friend try to slyly slip out the front door and watched him silently curse to himself when the bells jingled and he ran off. Will sighed. /Idiot./ he thought. He smacked himself on the forehead and groaned, standing up, he made way to go after Jack.
............................................................................................................
Jack walked down an alley and praised himself on his success of losing Will. Jack chuckled snidely looking behind him to see that Will was indeed not there. "Heh heh heh... Will thought he'd tricked me! But not ol' Jack! I'm the one who did the tricking, that I did. Now I'm gonna go back to the Black—"
SHING!
"Ook!" Jack stopped abruptly in his tracks, staring at the point of a sword that was only a few centimeters away from his face.
"Jack. You ARE going to APA," Will said in a dangerous tone, "whether you like it or not."
Jack clasped his hands together and said in a pleading voice, "Please, my dear William, don't take away me rum. Taking away me rum is like, like... taking Elizabeth or Blacksmithing away from YOU."
/Elizabeth?!/ Will thought, lowering his weapon at this sudden mental attack.
Jack put his head down and sniffed slightly, his eyes beginning to tear up.
Will put a hand on Jack's shoulder sympathetically. "Jack, I know this is hard for you but it's for the best. We're just trying to help. Surely you know that."
"*sniff* I know m'boy, I know..." Jack looked up and gave Will a feeble smile. "I 'spose I better be going to that meeting now, eh?"
"Yes, I suppose. You're doing the right thing, Jack."
Jack turned to walk away. "Yeah, an' I realize that now, thanks ta you an' th' crew."
"We're just trying to be good friends to you." Will reassured him.
"Bless ya lad, bless ya." Jack said. He stopped, his back still to Will. "But, before I go," he said solemnly, "can I tell you something?"
"Of course Jack! Anything!" Will said, pleased that Jack trusted him.
Jack spun around and drew his sword, pointing it at Will. "THAT YOU WILL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE, BOYO!" He yelled, delighted that he had tricked Will for the second time that night.
/What?!/ Will thought, outraged. "So this was all just a big act, then?" He asked sadly. He looked hurt. He had fallen prey to one of Jack's pranks yet again.
"Aye!" Jack radiated with self-satisfaction.
"I thought you were telling the truth..." Will's voice cracked and he quickly turned to the side so Jack couldn't see him.
Jack lowered his weapon and asked awkwardly, "Er... you en't gonna get all emotional, now are ye?"
Will closed his eyes tightly. "I honestly thought you had changed, Jack..." He sat down hard on one of the crates in the alley and covered his face with his hands. "God! I can't believe I was so stupid!"
Jack sat on his knees on the ground, next to him and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Don't be so 'ard on yerself, lad! It's all right. Many 'ave been tricked by me! No need t' fret! You're wastin' too much brine o'er it! It's alright!"
Will wiped his sleeve across his nose and gave a dramatic sniff.
"Everyfthing'll turn out! I know it will!"
"You really think so?" Will asked, muffled by his own hands.
"Most definitely." Jack said cheerily.
Will made his move. Quickly snatching up his sword, he shoved a shocked Jack backwards to the ground, sat on his lap (to subdue him and keep him from moving people! This isn't a slash fic! I know that that was running through your little minds, so just wanted to clarify it!), and pointed his sword at Jack's throat. This all happened in a fraction of a second. "Good," Will panted, "because I think so too! Like I said Jack, you WILL be going to those meetings!"
Jack had his hands up and eyes wide. He breathlessly asked, "B-b-but Will! How?! How did you manage to trick me?!"
"The answer is quite simple really..."
"Oh yeah? How so?"
Will leaned into Jack so closely that the loose strands of hair that fell out of Will's ponytail tickled Jack's face. He could feel his breath warm on him. "Because mate," He explained, "I'm William Turner. Savvy?" He concluded with a deviant smile, rebellion glinted in the boy's eyes.
"That's my line..." Jack croaked. He slowly reached for his sword that was a few feet away, feeling blindly for it's familiar looped hilt.
THOK!
Will's sword was thrown in between his fingers into the center of the loop, pinning it to the ground. Jack jerked his hand back and looked at it, making sure that all of his fingers were still there.
Will leaned back a bit, still sitting on Jack and crossed his arms. He smirking at him. "You didn't really think I was going to let get your sword, did you?" he asked Jack as if he was asking a small child.
"Alright! Alright!" Jack spat defeatedly. "You win! Now get offa me!" Will did get up and offered Jack a hand up as well. He took it but looked at the ground sadly. "I guess you finally beat me, eh?"
"Of course!"
"At least you did it in a far more civil way than that Elizabeth girl. Stupid, rum burning wench." He grumbled. "But how can that be? I mean, I'm Captain Jack Sparrow, for god's sakes! I don't understand!"
Will held a warning finger up to Jack. "Now let's not start that again!"
"Damn, It was worth a try though." Jack said innocently.
"Alright, let's go!" Will forcefully spun Jack around and shoved him roughly forwards.
"Hey! Easy wifth the shovin' there, mate!"
"Don't care, keep walking!" Will said in a very authoritative voice and shoved him forward again.
............................................................................................................
The door to the APA class banged open. Everyone in the class turned sharply to see what was there.
Will, holding on to the back of Jack's vest, addressed the doctor. "I'll come pick him up at 8.00 when the class is over. Here ya go!" Will literally threw Jack inside.
Jack fell to the ground and skidded to a halt on his face. This wasn't what he had planned. Starting to pick himself up, he grunted, "Erf... 'ow dare 'e fthrow the cap'n round like that! Ooh... he'll pay dearly for this he will." His face was now successfully peeled from the smooth wood floor. His hair was messed up and he had a large red floor burn on the side of his face. He looked up. "Eh?"
The doctor stared down at him, a menacing gleam shimmered on her diamond studded spectacles. Her hands were on her hips and Jack could practically see fire billowing around her, and horns sprout from her head.
"Welcome back Mr. Sparrow," She grinned in a dangerously low, yet amused tone.
Jack was in pure terror. "OH GODS!!!" he yelped.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Brine: salt water = tears
NYAHAHAHAHAHA! ANOTHER CHAPTER COMPLETED! One more and that's all with this storeh! Sorry it took so long to get put up, people. But was it worth it? Of course it was!!! ..................................... No seriously, was it? Let me know! Review please!!
APRIL FOOLS!!!
Did I scare ya? Huh, huh?
YAY! ANOTHER CHAPTER!!! I would like to say that the 'APA' idea belongs to one of mah friends. I was originally going to do just 'AA' but she said "Hey, why don't you do Alcoholic PIRATES Anonymous." And I was like, "OK." So there you go. Kudos to you Lora for the spiffy idea! *Whistles the starburst tune* (If any of you got that inside joke-thingy, I'd just like to let you know that you're a really big dork! :P lol.)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Sitting in a dark corner of 'The Drunken Swordfish's tavern at a small table, leaning against one arm and his head in his hand, Jack sighed discouragedly. He said, "the usual please," to the waitress who had come up to take his order. Closing his eyes he recalled angrily what had happened earlier that day. /I can't believe the are making me do this! They betrayed me! How dare they! I'm Captain Jack Sparrow! They can't do this! I'm the terror of the seven bloody seas!/ The waitress placed the mug on the table and Jack looked down at it with a relieved expression. /Well, at least I still have me rum.../ He picked it up and took a long drink from it, his thoughts elsewhere so he failed to hear the jingling of the bells that rang when the pub door was opened. He didn't hear the foot steps approaching and only realized someone was there when they slammed their hand down onto the table forcefully, causing a big sound and announcing their presence.
"SO Jack!" Will said loudly and quickly, "How's APA goin' for ya?"
Scaring the living daylights out of Jack, he sprayed some of the rum out of his mouth, and choked on the rest.
Jack coughed into his fist while he spoke in a hoarsed voice. "*cough- cough* Don't--*cough* don't SCARE me like that! *cough-cough*" he tried to hiss through coughing fits.
Will looked down at the ominous looking liquid in Jack's mug. Knowing full well what it really was he asked, "Jack? What is that? It better not be rum..."
"Uh... it's um...apple juice?" He said as more of a question than an answer.
"Well then, I'm sure you won't mind if I have some, since it's just apple juice, right?" Will said smugly, reaching for the cup.
"Well, actually, I um...I..." Jack stuttered, trying to think of an excuse. He leapt up and waved his arms frantically. "WILL! Wait stop! Don't drink it!"
Will stopped, it was almost at his mouth, but lowered it back down again, still holding on. "What? Why not?" He narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Jack. "If it's just apple juice, why can't I drink it?"
Jack nervously looked around for another excuse to get him to not drink it. This was too much stress for the poor pirate! His mind couldn't function properly.
"Because!...ah, erm... it's...uh..." He had a brilliant idea! Well, it seemed brilliant to him at the time, anyway. He reached his hand up and smacked the rum out of Will's hand, spilling it all over the floor. "Oh! Look at that Will! Ya spilled it you clumsy boy!"
Will glared daggers at him, his eyes now mere slits. Jack laughed nervously and grinned with exaggerated airs. "Heheheheh... let me go get ya another one..." and he quickly scurried off. Will sat down at the table and watched him leave. And he really did leave. Will drummed his fingers on the table in annoyance as he watched his pirate friend try to slyly slip out the front door and watched him silently curse to himself when the bells jingled and he ran off. Will sighed. /Idiot./ he thought. He smacked himself on the forehead and groaned, standing up, he made way to go after Jack.
............................................................................................................
Jack walked down an alley and praised himself on his success of losing Will. Jack chuckled snidely looking behind him to see that Will was indeed not there. "Heh heh heh... Will thought he'd tricked me! But not ol' Jack! I'm the one who did the tricking, that I did. Now I'm gonna go back to the Black—"
SHING!
"Ook!" Jack stopped abruptly in his tracks, staring at the point of a sword that was only a few centimeters away from his face.
"Jack. You ARE going to APA," Will said in a dangerous tone, "whether you like it or not."
Jack clasped his hands together and said in a pleading voice, "Please, my dear William, don't take away me rum. Taking away me rum is like, like... taking Elizabeth or Blacksmithing away from YOU."
/Elizabeth?!/ Will thought, lowering his weapon at this sudden mental attack.
Jack put his head down and sniffed slightly, his eyes beginning to tear up.
Will put a hand on Jack's shoulder sympathetically. "Jack, I know this is hard for you but it's for the best. We're just trying to help. Surely you know that."
"*sniff* I know m'boy, I know..." Jack looked up and gave Will a feeble smile. "I 'spose I better be going to that meeting now, eh?"
"Yes, I suppose. You're doing the right thing, Jack."
Jack turned to walk away. "Yeah, an' I realize that now, thanks ta you an' th' crew."
"We're just trying to be good friends to you." Will reassured him.
"Bless ya lad, bless ya." Jack said. He stopped, his back still to Will. "But, before I go," he said solemnly, "can I tell you something?"
"Of course Jack! Anything!" Will said, pleased that Jack trusted him.
Jack spun around and drew his sword, pointing it at Will. "THAT YOU WILL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE, BOYO!" He yelled, delighted that he had tricked Will for the second time that night.
/What?!/ Will thought, outraged. "So this was all just a big act, then?" He asked sadly. He looked hurt. He had fallen prey to one of Jack's pranks yet again.
"Aye!" Jack radiated with self-satisfaction.
"I thought you were telling the truth..." Will's voice cracked and he quickly turned to the side so Jack couldn't see him.
Jack lowered his weapon and asked awkwardly, "Er... you en't gonna get all emotional, now are ye?"
Will closed his eyes tightly. "I honestly thought you had changed, Jack..." He sat down hard on one of the crates in the alley and covered his face with his hands. "God! I can't believe I was so stupid!"
Jack sat on his knees on the ground, next to him and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Don't be so 'ard on yerself, lad! It's all right. Many 'ave been tricked by me! No need t' fret! You're wastin' too much brine o'er it! It's alright!"
Will wiped his sleeve across his nose and gave a dramatic sniff.
"Everyfthing'll turn out! I know it will!"
"You really think so?" Will asked, muffled by his own hands.
"Most definitely." Jack said cheerily.
Will made his move. Quickly snatching up his sword, he shoved a shocked Jack backwards to the ground, sat on his lap (to subdue him and keep him from moving people! This isn't a slash fic! I know that that was running through your little minds, so just wanted to clarify it!), and pointed his sword at Jack's throat. This all happened in a fraction of a second. "Good," Will panted, "because I think so too! Like I said Jack, you WILL be going to those meetings!"
Jack had his hands up and eyes wide. He breathlessly asked, "B-b-but Will! How?! How did you manage to trick me?!"
"The answer is quite simple really..."
"Oh yeah? How so?"
Will leaned into Jack so closely that the loose strands of hair that fell out of Will's ponytail tickled Jack's face. He could feel his breath warm on him. "Because mate," He explained, "I'm William Turner. Savvy?" He concluded with a deviant smile, rebellion glinted in the boy's eyes.
"That's my line..." Jack croaked. He slowly reached for his sword that was a few feet away, feeling blindly for it's familiar looped hilt.
THOK!
Will's sword was thrown in between his fingers into the center of the loop, pinning it to the ground. Jack jerked his hand back and looked at it, making sure that all of his fingers were still there.
Will leaned back a bit, still sitting on Jack and crossed his arms. He smirking at him. "You didn't really think I was going to let get your sword, did you?" he asked Jack as if he was asking a small child.
"Alright! Alright!" Jack spat defeatedly. "You win! Now get offa me!" Will did get up and offered Jack a hand up as well. He took it but looked at the ground sadly. "I guess you finally beat me, eh?"
"Of course!"
"At least you did it in a far more civil way than that Elizabeth girl. Stupid, rum burning wench." He grumbled. "But how can that be? I mean, I'm Captain Jack Sparrow, for god's sakes! I don't understand!"
Will held a warning finger up to Jack. "Now let's not start that again!"
"Damn, It was worth a try though." Jack said innocently.
"Alright, let's go!" Will forcefully spun Jack around and shoved him roughly forwards.
"Hey! Easy wifth the shovin' there, mate!"
"Don't care, keep walking!" Will said in a very authoritative voice and shoved him forward again.
............................................................................................................
The door to the APA class banged open. Everyone in the class turned sharply to see what was there.
Will, holding on to the back of Jack's vest, addressed the doctor. "I'll come pick him up at 8.00 when the class is over. Here ya go!" Will literally threw Jack inside.
Jack fell to the ground and skidded to a halt on his face. This wasn't what he had planned. Starting to pick himself up, he grunted, "Erf... 'ow dare 'e fthrow the cap'n round like that! Ooh... he'll pay dearly for this he will." His face was now successfully peeled from the smooth wood floor. His hair was messed up and he had a large red floor burn on the side of his face. He looked up. "Eh?"
The doctor stared down at him, a menacing gleam shimmered on her diamond studded spectacles. Her hands were on her hips and Jack could practically see fire billowing around her, and horns sprout from her head.
"Welcome back Mr. Sparrow," She grinned in a dangerously low, yet amused tone.
Jack was in pure terror. "OH GODS!!!" he yelped.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Brine: salt water = tears
NYAHAHAHAHAHA! ANOTHER CHAPTER COMPLETED! One more and that's all with this storeh! Sorry it took so long to get put up, people. But was it worth it? Of course it was!!! ..................................... No seriously, was it? Let me know! Review please!!
