Disclaimer: I don't own nothing! Except for: the White Chocolate Turtle Men in Charge of Hostile Collection, the Evil Overlord Auction, KIND (Kind, Intelligent, Nice, Do-gooder Disease, tragic, that) the Bomber Cockroaches, the Raging Gorilla Mice that came with Uzis… And, of course, myself! (Myself being Seadragon of course. See? Just scroll your eyes up a little bit, and… Ta Da! Author: Seadragon!)
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And now, without further ado, please welcome: THE VOICES FROM BEYOND!
Or, Worm, Abel, and Kade, my three, semi-insane muses. Well, if you add them up, you get one, completely insane, klepto/pyro, with several issues not worth the time it would take to delve into them…
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Worm: She always does this!
Abel: Does what?
Kade: Yes Worm, please explain.
Worm: She goes a really long time without updating!
Kade: I feel an and coming on.
Worm: And,
Kade: And there it is!
Worm: *rolls eyes* She leads us to hope that this story has been cancelled! I mean, what, this is the fourth chapter in how long?
Abel: Almost a year.
Worm: See what I mean?!
Kade: Sadly, yes.
Abel: Can we just get on with it?
Kade: Again, sadly, no.
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Seadragon: Contrary to popular belief, I have not abandoned this story!
Alanna: Unfortunately.
Seadragon: I have just, er, been, er, *hopefully* busy?
Alanna: She means lazy.
Seadragon: *indignantly* Do not! I've updated plenty of other stuff haven't I?
Alanna: She means, uh…
Seadragon: *rolls eyes* Well done Mrs. Lioness! You have just won the award for the stupidest person on the show!
Alanna: *confused* I thought Jon won that…
Seadragon: Key word there: thought.
Alanna: *narrows eyes* Speaking of Jon,
Seadragon: *edges away slowly*
Alanna: WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?!
Seadragon: Er… Nothing?
Alanna: Oh right, I'm supposed to believe that!
Treanz: She does have a point you know, you don't exactly scream honest.
Alanna: Great, just great.
Seadragon: Good to have you here Treanz, ready for some character torturing?
Treanz: *evil grin* Oh, very.
Seadragon: Just what I like to hear.
Treanz: By the way, who's up this time?
Seadragon: *swoons* Neal…
Alanna: Neal? This day really can't get much worse…
Thayet: Oh Alanna-a!
Alanna: Someone kill me now.
Seadragon: *bouncing up and down with her hand waving around frantically* Oh! Me! Pick me!
Treanz: Great, now you got her all excited!
Alanna: Er… I'm sorry?
Treanz: Yah, sure.
Thayet: Alanna! You promised you'd go shopping today!
Alanna: What?! No I didn't!
Seadragon: *innocently* Oh, did I forget to tell you that? Silly me. *grins evilly*
Treanz: You?
Seadragon: Me.
Treanz: Very nice.
White Chocolate Turtle Men in Charge of Hostile Collection Commander: *salutes* Ma'am! We are ready to round up Hostile 17!
Treanz: *narrows eyes* I thought I took those DVDs away…
Seadragon: What's the harm in a little Buffy?
Treanz: I worry about you sometimes. No, sorry, correction. I worry about the people around you, all the time.
Seadragon: *flaps a hand at Treanz and turns back to the WCTMCHC Commander* Well? Get on with it then!
WCTMCHC Commander: Yes ma'am! *salutes again and the WCTMCHC march away again*
Treanz: You certainly have an interesting array of, er, hired help.
Seadragon: *nods* I got them for a steal at the Evil Overlord Auction last week.
Treanz: Oh really? How was that? I missed it.
Alanna: Um? Hello? Hi. Me again. Just wondering, where the hell is the king?!
Treanz: *baby voice* Aww! Looks wike Awanna has got a wittle cwush!
Alanna: Grr…
Seadragon: Now, now! No violence on my show!
All: *freeze, turn, and stare at her*
Seadragon: *wide-eyed* Did- did I just say that?!
Treanz: *whips out a thermometer and takes Seadragon's temperature* Tsk, tsk, you're running a fever! Don't tell me you were chasing people in the rain again!
Seadragon: Er… Oops?
Treanz: Well, seeing as it's making you delirious, a pacifist, and, strangely enough, nice, we know it's effecting you quite badly. Nothing but bed rest for you!
Seadragon: *whines* But Neal…
Treanz: Now!
Seadragon: *sniff*
Alanna: Am I the only one who has no idea what's going on?
Treanz: I thought you went with Thayet.
Alanna: *grins* About that…
Treanz: *rolls eyes* I swear! You Tortallans are so violent! *gasps* Oh no! I've caught it to! Damn you Seadragon! Damn you!
Seadragon: Heh, sorry?
Treanz: Meanie. Augh! Someone! Anyone! Help!
Alanna: *grins* Well, seeing as both of our hosts have unfortunately caught KIND. Which, by the way, stands for, Kind Intelligent Nice Do-gooder Disease. It's very serious. Anyway, seeing have they have KIND, that means that I, Alanna, have control! Mwhahahaha!
White Chocolate Turtle Men in Charge of Hostile Collection Officer Graham Cracker: Hey! That's her! Hostile 3! You know, the one who ate Officer Chocolate Chip!
White Chocolate Turtle Men in Charge of Hostile Collection Officer Peanut Brittle: ATTACK!
Alanna: Help!!
Seadragon: What d'you know, these guys are very useful. Maybe I'll get some more, or maybe some of those Bomber Cockroaches. Or some Raging Gorilla Mice that came with Uzis…
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And thanks to today's sponsors!
The Apocalypse Monkeys!
The Uber Great Under Water Mash Potato Army!
And,
The Invisible Chinchillas of Doom!
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And, for the first time in my history of a fan fiction writer, a special thanks to the reviewers!
I'm beginning to think KIND has jumped out of my computer…
Bev Baudelaire: Thank you! Well, don't kill yourself laughing… Oh no! What am I saying?! KIND is lose! It's gonna take over the world! *sniff*
Evil Reno: Die evil bitch! Just kidding! You know I love you. Ergh, I was a attacked by a rabid beetle once. Unfortunately, the beetle one… Doesn't say much about me does it?
Kassi of Pirate's Swoop: Alright, so it wasn't exactly soon, but I'm trying! Really!
Dead Life: Ooh! Me likes Jack! Thanks by the way!
Wolf of Light: It didn't take me that long! Did it? Meh. I give up. I rarely update this story, and I am sorry! But, it does happen occasionally! Be proud of me people! It's hard! Okay, no it's not, I love to write. But, hey! What can I say?
FlamingKnight: Why thank you! I'll keep that in mind! Ooh! Speaking of weird things to eat… At my school (HSC) we have hot tea and coffee. Mix: 1/3 coffee, 1/3 tea, 1/3 chocolate milk. Stir well and drink. I accidentally poured a cup down my friend's back the other day. Total accident, I swear!
Aki Majere: I will, slowly but surely! Thanks!
Peachy Garlic: Well, I suppose you learn something new everyday! By the by, do you have MSN? If so, add me @ alexlippert@hotmail.com. This is for anyone who wants to contact me on MSN, my other address is for e-mails. Well, Treanz came, and nearly conquered, but, she got sick too, sorry!
