Chapter 4: Don't let me get me

"Hey, Ellie," Sean said, walking over and sitting down next to her. Craig Manning sat down next to him.

"Hey, Ellie," Craig replied, smiling.

Ellie looked at both of the boys like they hadn't even said her name. "What?" she asked.

"Are you ok?" Craig asked.

"I'm fine, guys," she said.

Sean looked at her and then at his friend. Craig nodded and went to talk to Spinner, Jimmy, and Marco. Sean turned to Ellie. "You sure you're ok?" he asked. "You seem almost out of it."

"I said I'm fine," she snapped.

Sean looked at her and blinked. "Come on, Ellie," he said. "I just asked if you were ok you don't have to go psycho maniac killer on me."

She blinked. "I'm sorry."

"Marco's pretty worried about you," Sean said. "So is Ashley."

"Oh," she replied. "Sorry, I didn't get enough sleep last night." That lie had just slipped over her blood-red painted lips like everything she had said. Like her being "fine". But she wasn't. Saying nothing when someone asked her what was wrong. She was looking them in the eye and lying to their faces.

He nodded. "That's ok," he replied. "Do you want to talk?"

"About what?"

"Whatever."

She shrugged and sat down on the bench of one of the tables and he sat down on the table next to her. "Do you want to start?"

He shrugged. "Why don't you go first?"

Ellie shook her head. She was afraid that she might spill everything out to him.

"Why don't you go first," she said.

"Ok," Sean replied. "What's happening with you?"

"Why is it about me?" she asked. "Can't it be about you?"

"I was thinking that you had a much more interesting life than me."

"You know what," she said. "I don't really want to talk about anything."

Ellie jumped up and walked away. She didn't feel like talking. She felt like screaming. "STOP ME! PLEASE! I WANT TO STOP WHAT I'M DOING TO MYSELF! DON'T LET ME GET ME!"