Watching me, Wanting me

Midnight

Ever get that feeling when you know something isn't right in the world? Like when you're dreaming, even though it feels real, you know it's not? Yet, it feels so right, but you know it isn't? That's what I feel right now. I just can't grasp what it is. When those leeches of Coles' came for me earlier, and took me out of the room, they took me to another room. It was sort of rectangular, not like a squared room. And it held clothes, a whole lot of clothes in there. I wondered how I even fit inside. All of the clothes were hung up onto racks, which went zooming around the room for your own lazy needs. Like in the cleaners. There were two fitting rooms, but they were behind screens, and at least there was a seat to sit down in. I was just looking around in one of them, and came across a dress lain out. It was white and silky. A bit on the sheer side as well, but lovely in each way. The dress looked like it was chopped up by Edward Scissors Hands, but with a unique touch. I changed my clothes, and slipped this one over my head, the straps where thin and I hoped I didn't come across Edward, because one snip and the dress would fall apart. I felt good in it, it fit me just right, and while I went flaunting around and gloating at my prospect of new clothing, I noticed some white sandals nearby. Strapping them on almost up to my ankle, I looked even better, felt even better about myself. Something I haven't felt in a while in those old clothes I wore around. Not to mention there was jewelry hanging out in the open. So curious of me, I took a hold of many and slipped on some bracelets, necklaces, rings, toe rings. Not too over the top, but enough to satisfy my gluttony.

Just after I finished applying all the things I found there and stop the big grin on my face, a woman appeared in the room. She was probably one of the puppets too. But this was the first time, I saw a woman puppet. Has Cole been seeking his pleasures with other women as well? When I saw her, a mixture of emotions entered me. I frowned at the sight of her, and thought about the question that was on the tip of my tongue. I was going to ask her, but then again it didn't seem appropriate. I'm not sure why I cared if he did, he is the big bad Cole Turner after all. And I'm just another concubine in his possession. But I have to confess, I did feel a twinge of jealousy, and heartbroken at that idea.

When the woman came up to me, smiling ear to ear, her eyes sparkling as she looked at me. I forgot my accusation on her part and Coles. She carried a basket in her hand, filled with hair products and brushes plus combs. I blinked at her dumbly, and she just grinned, and pointed to my hair. Obviously she wasn't a woman of words, just pointing. And I knew then she came to do my hair. It was a bit on the tangle side, but it gave a mousy bed hair affect. I thought it was a nice look, but on the other hand she didn't, nor did Cole. Since he probably did send her.

She sat me down onto the seat inside the fitting room, and began to brush my hair. She had hands like a mother brushing their daughter's hair, she was gentle, and I was grateful. I'm a bit tender headed. She twirled and styled and blew, and sprayed my hair into perfection. It wasn't up exactly and wasn't down all the way. It was different, exotic almost. She added one more touch to my features, red lip stick on my lips. Handing me a mirror, I saw my reflection. It was completely unbelievable. I haven't seen myself in a long time and especially dressed up like this. The shock of it almost knocked the air out of my lungs. I looked at her, and she was still grinning like she did before. Afterwards, she walked me toward the door, ushering me outside, where another tender seemed to be waiting for me. Even this tender looked happy when he saw me. A smile seemed to tug at the tender's lips. I wonder how long have these servants of Coles been without happiness in their lives?

Leading me to another room, the tender showed me inside and whispered so quietly I almost didn't catch what he said. I never knew they could even speak sometimes, all I got out of the regular ones were grunts, groans and ape like noises. The tender closed the door on me, and advised me earlier that I could sit anywhere and the others would be in shortly. Well that was something new, there we're going to be others, and I never knew Cole had friends or associates outside of the mansion, that would be attending dinner, as it seemed to be a dinner service.

To describe the room, in all short it was breathtaking, something almost out of a fantasy romance book. The room held tables for only two people each, with a maroon curtain around all of them for privacy, except they were tied by a cord at the moment to let the couples in. The furniture was all made out of fine red wood, it seemed like a theme in the room. One color, but different shades of it, it gave the room an exotic look. The only source of light inside where the candles, their flames dancing about on the walls, reflecting off the enormous mirrors on the walls. I tiptoed to the table in the center of the room, only because it seemed that the room shouldn't be aloud with noise, not even a pin drop. Inside the curtain and sitting down on the comfortable chair, its cushion made of velvet, I surveyed the table in front of me. A rose was inside a circular glass vase of water, giving off its alluring scent, right in the middle of the table. The tablecloth underneath it, as I felt was made of red satin. I was amused for a while, as I thought about spilling wine, that possibly would be red wine, since the tablecloth was of already red and how it wouldn't really ruin the tablecloth at all, but maybe there would be a big wet blotch there instead.

I was gazing into the firelight reflecting in the enormous mirror on the wall, when the first guests arrived. They were conversing with each other when they had entered, and went straight over to the seat near the mirror. A second couple came in after them, filling in the next closets table, and then another. The pattern continued until I thought that would be enough, there clearly where no more seats, but I was wrong, more came in and there seem to be more tables for them, that I hadn't noticed. The most curious thing about all the couples, they wore black. As though it was a funeral, no other hint of color on any of them, except the drowning black that was everywhere. While, I, in the white stood out against them.

There were low whispers among them all, like a hum of voices together at once. They all drew their curtains around their tables, but I was able to see their eyes piercing through them, as they occasionally glanced at me, or the men giving a wink in my direction. We we're all inside, and the flood of the black clothed men and women stopped, only my table seemed to be waiting for that last person, and I knew who just it was.

Cole–




I can feel you pull me down

Continuation

I never got to finish, once I had written that word down, he had appeared. Him appearing to me, so quietly, so gently, so stealthy, might I add, shocked me and made me stop in mid-sentence. I really do hate how I stop so frequently in mid-sentence, and have to still explain what had happened, but I feel it's my duty to write my experiences within this cage, to someone, even if this 'someone' isn't anyone, but just an object. Like me, just an object.

He came, standing against the wall of my room, his face was hidden in the darkness of the corner, but the moonlight coming from the window cascaded down his body. It was clothed, thankfully, but he was dressed not in his usual black suit, more casual. That was something different, I hadn't seen him wear casual clothes since . . . before. I could feel his eye's bore into my soul. My body didn't stand a chance against those eyes of his. As if predator and prey, I the prey of course, he the predator, I stood there motionless, watching while he calculated a plan on ensnaring his prize. I watched, he watched, my eyes traveled from the point of his neck, where his grey turtleneck met, and went down his torso, changing to where his black pants met. I raised my eyebrows at him. It was impressive, different and still altogether quite shocking. For him, it was a signal to swoop down and capture what he was there for.

As quietly as he had come, he stalked me quietly as I backed away from him, afraid of what I might realize all too soon. But his haunting green-blue eyes still alive with fire, seemed to smother me to no end, until I would give up the fight and let go. But I was a fighter, I am a fighter, there would be no other way for me to go. I stopped right before my shoulder blades collided with the cold wall, and stalked right into him, daring him to come closer to me. But it seemed I was playing right into his trap, or so it seemed his trap. Not surprised at all from my behavior, he wrapped his arms around me, lifting me up on the balls of my feet, much stronger than I, he could if he wanted, snap me in two.

We were by the window in my room in no time. The window was open and the night air rushed in, just great for the moment. We were heated. The blood in our veins was boiling, rushing through our bodies to our heads. Coles hands set me on fire, scorched my skin deep into my soul. My head was bent to the side as he laid hungry kisses along my neck and collar bone. The moment was perfect, but that intense moment was forgotten all too quickly. The moonlight poured down on us, the wind blew at our heated bodies. It was then, the wind, the moonlight that knocked some sense into me.

Everything he had done to me in the past, rushed into my head. Sounds, images, emotions all whispering to me, taunting me, haunting me, reminding me, what he had done. He hadn't realized my anguish, my pain, my suffering, and it was all for him. I grounded my teeth together, as my eyes landed back on the man who was ripping the shirt I wore open. I watched him hypnotically. My actions were far apart from my thoughts. They were still occupied with another rush of remembrance, especially the memory of yesterday night. The one I didn't get to finish about, but I will now.

Imagine, that you are me. Waiting, while side way glances, gestures and stares are directed toward you, and the host. The one that has just arrived, garbed in his custom black, with a dab of red, the red carnation in his chest pocket. Making him and you the center of attention. Everyone stands as he walks leisurely toward your table, and not wanting to seem the odd ball out, you stand up yourself. Once he reaches your table, he pulls out your chair, just like any gentleman should. It's the cue for everyone else to sit, and enjoy their meal as puppets, servants, whatever you would like to call them, come pouring out bearing trays of food and drinks. Both of you are seated now, and his eyes are lighted up, they're looking directly into your eyes, making you blush a couple of shades red. It doesn't make sense to you. None of this makes sense. But you tell yourself, when has it made sense?

A waiter comes and pours both of you a glass of red wine, Cole, the man you happen to be dining with, raises his glass in the air as a salute to you, and brings it to his lips. The rest of the company raises their glasses to you in salute, bringing it to their lips and seem to wait, all staring intently at Cole, who is still looking at you. He drinks the wine and finishes it off, the rest then drink as well. As I told you before, it all doesn't make sense. But you just smile, and nervously bite your lip, and take your own wine glass in your hand and drink from it quickly.

Most of the dinner time, Cole is either staring intently at you, or eating, he and you make the smallest conversations in both of your lifetimes. All you hear around you is the low murmur of the other guests talking amongst themselves, and it seems they've already forgotten Cole and you.

Suddenly dinner time is over, the guests leave, all giving a curt nod or bow of the head in your direction, and the candle lights seem to dim down even more. You've had quite a bit of wine, so has he, and you both have been left to your own devices. The silence in the air is making you uncomfortable, so you start up conversation. Now that you got him talking, it seems that the days, weeks and months of estrangement have dissipated into the air. You laugh, you joke, you rethink everything you thought negative about him. Next his hand is on yours, you hold his hand reassuringly, and then he rises, bringing you up from your seat to follow him out of the room, and toward his own.

When you arrive at his room, he shuts the door and you watch him through the corner of your eye as he locks it. You know you're going to be there for the night, but you question yourself, do you really want to? He slides the lock into his pocket, and starts to undo the tie at his neck. While you sit gingerly at the edge of his bed, wondering if he thinks, that you think, that you'll be sleeping with him tonight, just because he's seemed to change into a new man. A smile that the devil himself must have used to seduce women, was splayed on his lips, as he removed the jacket and started to unbutton the black shirt. You force a smile onto your face, as you wait and watch his movements. You remember when both of you were talking before, as though none of the past events had ever taken place, and the smile that you forced is no longer there. But a grin. He's down to the last button, and you beckon him to come closer to you as you look up into his eyes. His eyes which always gave away whether it was the imposter of Cole or the real man himself. They held the man, who you loved, and whether it was a trick or not, whether this man whom you would sleep with tonight was genuine or not, you knew that sometimes the only way to keep the person you loved would be to give them your soul.

That night, you made love in which it seems it has been centuries since you have before. His arm is wrapped around you tenderly, while your fingers are entwined in his dark hair. Your eyes are closed, and he thinks you asleep, but you're not. The man in bed with you, is staring off into space, his attention drawn to something behind you. Opening your eyes you squint, taking a peep at his godly stature and a smile comes to your face, you feel reassured, but once your peeping eyes fix on his own eyes, you notice they're not as they were before. Maybe it was the wine that made you think differently earlier, maybe it's a mind trick of your own now, but his eyes are dark, darker than you've ever seen before. An alarm sounds in your head, the man in bed with you isn't you're beloved Cole, but the man you never wanted to see again, the man you've been trying to be rid of since you could. Your heart begins to beat rapidly, and you close your eyes as silent tears slip out of them, and onto the bed sheet.

You haven't been asleep for too long, when you wake up, your eyes are the only thing that moves, you look at the man sleeping beside you, his chest is moving up and down in soothing rhythms. Is he asleep? Is he still awake? These questions are the only two things on your mind, but you feel he has to be asleep now. Wanting to be cautious, you wait a few more minutes before you incline your head up at him and you find him sound asleep. Taking your time trying to make it out of the bed without waking him up, you wind your way out of the sheets covering you both, and the comforter at the bottom of the bed threatening to trip you. Once you make it out, that comforter in a defeated pile at the bed, you tip toe over to Cole's pants, where you remember he had placed the key that had locked the door. You slip a hand inside, pull the key out noiselessly, and creep to the door, sticking the key in you wait, wondering if any guards are outside or whether Cole had gotten up. Quickly turning the key you hear it click, silently as a mouse you slip out of the room. As your bare feet touch the cold tile floor, you close the door behind you as quietly as you can.

[A/N: I know this took me forever and a day to get out, but I feel I need perfection with my work, which is stressing and I know my work isn't perfect but I'm satisfied with it. I hope you all liked it, and thank you very much to my very good fan/reviewer whose emails have been helping me greatly to want to continue this story, and I'll be working on the ending very soon now. Thanks for all your help, Marijana Budak. It was greatly appreciated! If anyone else would like to send suggestions, you can at JeezShuddap@yahoo.com, with the title subject "Suggestions for DOP." Please R/R. :) ]