Disclaimer: If I owned "Newsies", it'd be a T.V. show so we could all swoon over Mush's fab abs, Spot's intimidating prettiness, and Race's extraordinary poker face every week.

Matchmaker: Chapter Six

Beware He Who Never Frowns

I'm a really stupid person, you know that? 'Cause after that conversation with Blink, I took him at his word and made the ingenious logical leap that if Mush really did ask him...

Let's just say that it wasn't pretty.

From what Mush told me, I gathered that it'd been a bit of an unpleasant shock for Blink, to say the least. Basically, he, in no uncertain terms, told Mush to "get the hell away from him".

"Told", however, may just be the biggest understatement I will ever make in my short, soon to be shorter, life.

Remember when I said that Mush never said anything to hurt anybody? Which means, in laymen's terms - would that be laymen's laymen's terms? - that he's never mad at anyone? Well, apparently, I didn't know him as well as I thought I did. As soon as I walked in that door and saw him standing there looking to murder someone, I knew something had gone wrong. Real wrong.

So I come in and grin at him, hoping to God he's bluffing or something, 'cause I mean, this is Mush we're talking about here. How often does Mush look like he wants to kill someone? Which is probably why I started shaking. 'Cause, I mean... Mush.

But because Lady Luck favors Race more than she favors me - probably has a crush on him, too - which I think is awfully unfair of her; who am I to complain about the way she runs things, though? I mean, if I did, she may very well decide to take away what little I have because she thinks I'm ungrateful or something. Anyway, as I was saying, because she likes Race more than she likes me, she decided that I should be the first person in history to find out exactly what being in Mush's bad graces feels like.

You know, I should get a monument for my troubles. A statue like that one of Horace Greeley's would be nice...

But I get ahead of myself.

"What the hell were ya thinkin'?!" he yelled, in a truly deafening fashion. It was early afternoon, and most of the boys weren't back yet, and I was glad for that. I mean, if it were Spot rampaging around, no one would pay him any mind. Okay... So that's not entirely true... But it'd still be less of a spectacle than Mush trying to wring my neck, you know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying.

"Huh?" Yeah, I know, real intelligent, but I honestly had no idea why he was mad at me. I didn't even know why he was mad at all! Well... I did, actually, I'm not that much of an idiot, but it's not like I knew all the gory details.

"You told me..." he started, brown eyes narrowed and voice painfully controlled. "You told me that Blink had said he'd think abou' it if I ever asked him..."

"Yeah, I did," I replied, wholly confused by his attitude. "That's what he told me."

"Then will you please explain to me why I am now banished from his life forever?!!"

Oh.

I blinked. And blinked again.

"You are?"

"Yes! And it's all thanks to you! You know, I appreciate your friendly intentions an' all, but did it ever occur to you that somethin' like this would not be a good thing to lie about?"

"What?!"

"I mean, you knew why I asked you to do that... I told you everythin'!! I even asked you not to lie, and you promised!!"

Remember when I said that Mush lives to see the bright side of things? Apparently, that doesn't apply to his romantic life.

"But I didn't!! You gotta believe me! He really did say that!!"

My pleas, because I'm the luckiest person in the world, fell on deaf ears.

"Then why would he say what he did to me, huh?! I know Blink, Sneaks, and he never goes back on his word!! Ever! I thought you'd do the same, but obviously not."

With that overly dramatic indignity, he shoved past me and stormed away. Or he tried to, in any case. Because just as he was making his exit, who should come by but Blink.

"Get outta my way, Alexander."

It was funny the way Blink used Mush's real name, like "Mush" was too intimate, but "pansy" and "queer" were too harsh.

Amazing the thoughts that pop into your head when you've just been severely shaken.

"My pleasure, Geoffrey," Mush spat back vehemently, sarcasm cascading from his words to land in large, frightening pools at his feet.

Blink. Mush. Fighting. After Mush had just yelled at me.

You'd think the day was as bad as it could get, right?

But no, 'cause as soon as Mush stalked away down the street to who-knows-where, Blink starts into me, too.

"This was some sick joke, wasn't it?! You and Mush planned it on purpose just to throw me off, didn't you?! Well, I wouldn't and don't particularly want to know about your sick, twisted pleasure, but it wasn't funny to me!!"

"Where the hell did you get that idea from?!" The sound burst from my throat. Part of my mind found his choice of words distinctively odd and decided to save it for later analysis. At the moment, I was frustrated as anything. I mean, when did this all turn into my problem? I was just the go between! How the fucking hell was any of this my fault?

"Well, it's pretty obvious, ain't it?! That day at the park when you asked me about Mush, you were really settin' me up, weren't ya?! I know I may not be the smartest person in the world, but I ain't that stupid!!"

"Well, apparently, you are, 'cause you seem to be unable to get it through your thick skull that I didn't do anythin'!!"

Maybe that was the wrong thing to say. All right, fine... It was most definitely the wrong thing to say. But after having been through this once with Spot and another with Mush not five minutes ago, I wasn't particularly keen on having to prove my innocence, of all things, one more time, if you get my meaning.

Look at it this way: at least I hadn't mentioned his amazing ignorance of the fact that Mush very obviously wasn't too happy with me, either.

Anyhow, like I said, it was the wrong thing to say. How do I know? Well, Mr. Ladies' Man himself pulled back and hit me full in the face. The punch was strong and unexpected enough that I actually fell, which is saying something, 'cause I'm not exactly the easiest person to knock over, you know what I'm saying?

Blink looked like he wanted to say something for a minute, but he apparently couldn't think of anything dramatic enough for his tastes 'cause he settled for glowering at me before turning on his heel and stomping out.

It was a highly traumatic experience, to say the least. I was in shock for the next two hours and didn't bother to move from my place on the floor of the lodging house. It was only when Race came in that he shook me from my stupor.

"Hey. You all right?" he asked, clearly concerned. I stared at him. All right? Was I all right? At his highly ridiculous question, I burst into tears.

Hey. If you'd just been yelled at by Mush, had witnessed a fight between the dynamic duo, and been yelled at and half-knocked out by Blink, what would you do?

I tried to stop. I really did. But it was really hard. And it actually felt kind of nice.

Fine. It was absolutely heavenly to cry it all out. How guys live without ever crying is beyond me. It's just such a release. Or it would be, if you weren't half-afraid that someone would see you and laugh at your pain.

But because Racetrack is the darling that he is, he asked no questions and simply told me that everything was okay. He even let me cry on him, which was awfully sweet. Then again, we're talking about Racetrack, who really is always sweet, isn't he?

In the space of one day, I had somehow managed to convince Mush that I'd lied to him, Blink that I was involved with some twisted, sadistic joke at his expense, thereby losing myself two valuable friends after tearing them apart, do the undoable and incur Mush's wrath, and break my lifelong oath to never cry in front of a guy.

But that guy was Racetrack, so everything was just peachy keen.

It had to be.

I'm really sorry this took so long, but as I've said, I've been awfully (my new word) busy as of late. In any case, I also apologize if Sneaks doesn't sound like herself because I'm trying to return to a formal mindset.

On a happier note, I changed the title. "Yrutnec" is my version of "turn-of-the-century" 'cause FFN wouldn't let me type it all out. It bugs me a little, but after intense consideration, I've decided that it adds to the humor.

Oh, yes, and this is a birthday chapter to my dear friend Goddess of Oblivion. Happy birthday, darling!! Told you I'd come through... ^_~

Gothic Author

Replies:

Omni:

Actually, to tell you the truth... I don't know. I'll have to see where this takes me.

I'm glad to see you're enjoying this. It's always a pleasure to please.

studentnumber24601:

Of course I did! Anything for the magnificent B, who I gratuitously worship!!

hilaRy:

Awww... I'm sowwy.... [big, teary eyes] I just couldn't resist... It's too much fun!!

No Blink/Mush valiant efforts yet, but they'll come... Maybe... XD XD XD

"VAUDEVILLE!" I NEED MORE BILLY!!!! AND BLINK/MUSH!!!! AND SPOT/RACE!!!!!!

Hell, I just need more "VAUDEVILLE!"

Funkiechick:

Any Spot/Race is good Spot/Race. A fact that we all agree on unanimously. Of course, if it's dirty... [suggestive grin]

Goddess of Oblivion:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DEAR LIVIIIIIIIIIIIII... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOOOOUUUUUUU!!!

[throws confetti]

T.T I'm so flattered...

Nerikla:

[falls over] @.@ Whoa... Another writer I gratuitously worship...

Thanks for the compliments...

Sinhe:

"Sexpot" is a fun word. So is "gratuitous". The English language is such an oddly pleasing thing...

Sheep milk cheese.

XD XD

Androgynish:

WE ARE THE NEO-SHAKESPEREANS!!!!!! BOW BEFORE OUR ADJECTIVICAL GENIUS!!!!!

Thanks go to: Thistle, Stage, Stardust, kellyanne, and Artemis-chan of Redwing, who I will try to reply to later. It's really late, and I have school, and my mother's getting pissed, so... I'll try, though! I really will!!

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!! Your support keeps me alive!!!!!