This is my first songfic as well as first attempt at EEnE romance (since that doesn't really fit the series)... so please be gentle. Despite the non-EEnE genre, I'm trying to keep the characters as close as possible... and crossing my fingers it comes out okay. (And, yes, it is a boy/boy romance story - you have been warned!) All feedback appreciated (with the exception of mindless flames). And this is a multi-chapter songfic (it'll be either 2 or 3 chapters total), so, yes, it does continue after this.
Giving credit where it's due - this fic is inspired by the song "30 Minutes" by T.A.T.U.
(Oh, and for those wondering where Zero Visibility went... the Cosmos seems to be against me finishing/posting the thing... if it's not a virus, it's just me being stupid and breaking the disk it's on. Along with ZV now going in the totally opposite direction of which I was first planning and a bout of "I'm tired of this for now," I've decided to just put it on hold until I can figure out how to finish it without it totally getting all, well... not good. Sorry, all. guilty look But there will be more stories from me in the meantime. )
Hope you enjoy!
Kit
(UPDATE: 07/03/05 - Reading through other songfics on this site, I was just made aware of the "no lyrics" rule. Yes, I've been away for a while, I guess. :P Thus, to prevent any repercussions to this story or my account - namely, the deletion of either - I have removed the lyrics. I will post a version with lyrics on my website at a later date.)
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Eddy stared silently at the broken picture frame on the ground before him. In it was a photo of him, with his brother and parents. When they were happy.They could never be happy now. They knew.
Carefully picking the shattered frame off of his bedroom floor and blinking away a stray tear or two, Eddy pushed aside the visions of how his father had smashed him over the head with it and stormed out. He tried to forget the harsh words... the accusations of breaking up the family... the stinging of his father's hand as it whipped across his cheek. All because he'd fallen in love with someone he wasn't supposed to.
He'd failed miserably in making his parents proud. His grades were poor, his attitude was always a problem... and now this. His parents had discovered what he'd been hiding for the longest time... from them, from him, from himself.
Placing the frame under his bed, Eddy leaned back on his bed and gazed at his mirror ball in agonizing contemplation. He couldn't stay here... not now that his family knew the truth. Between his father's violent retributions and his mother's patronizing attitude... he couldn't make it here. The tension and pain was already becoming too much, and it had only been ten minutes since they found out, his father storming out of the house afterwards with his mother and leaving him alone. Who knew where they went or when they'd be back... all he knew was, if he was going to leave, he had to before they returned.
Edd watched silently from his front window as Eddy's parents screeched out of their driveway and out of the cul-de-sac. He couldn't help but feel guilty... if he hadn't have kissed Eddy in the first place, this wouldn't have happened. The look of horror on Eddy's face as his parents walked in on them was still etched clearly in his mind.
"It's my fault..." he whispered hoarsly to no one in particular as his gaze remained tranfixed on Eddy's home. He shouldn't have left him there alone... who knew how badly his parents had taken it. But when he'd recieved that ice cold glare from Eddy's mother and that infuriated one from Eddy's father, Edd could do nothing but oblige when he was asked to leave. He'd caused enough trouble... surely staying would have only made things worse. Right?
Edd sighed as he rubbed his eyes, reddened from crying. He knew Eddy well enough to know what he'd be thinking right now. He was most certainly contemplating a way to get away from his homophobic parents... probably running away. He couldn't really blame him... as it was, his own parents would no doubt be informed by Eddy's parents of the little 'incident.' He shuddered at the thought of their reactions - he'd always been taught that it was wrong to love another boy. That he should be in love with Sarah or Nazz. Not Eddy.
Surely his parents would punish him... perhaps send him away to another private school. Away from Eddy.
He couldn't let that happen.
But, as much as he wanted to just run away with Eddy and live happily ever after, he knew the odds of that happening successfuly were slim - infinitesimal, even. Two boys their age could never make it on their own alone... not in this world. And not with the odds so heavily stacked against them. Along with financial and housing troubles, there would be prejudice... perhaps even hate crimes if they were to go to the wrong parts of the city. Where would they live? How would they live? Where would they get food? Or clothes? And, despite recent events, their parents would surely worry about them...
While he and Eddy would have each other for support... Edd just wasn't sure that would be enough.
With another disconsolate sigh, Edd slowly made his way to his room and shut the door. He then picked up the phone and dialed the number to Eddy's room.
"I'm leavin', Double-D."
The sound of Eddy's cracked voice nearly brought Edd to tears himself. He'd expected such a greeting, but still...
"Eddy... I know I can't change your mind, but I... I-I can't go with you."
There was a pause before a more bitter sounding Eddy responded.
"Oh, so now that kiss meant jack to you."
"That's not true, Eddy! I lo-" Edd stopped himself and continued in a quieter, gentler tone. "I love you, Eddy. I have for a long time now. But I can't just throw my life away for something that's bound to fail."
Another long pause.
"Fine. If you really have that little faith in us..."
"Eddy, please. It's not that... I just - " Edd stopped and let out a sigh, thinking of how to put it. "I'm frightened, Eddy. The odds are stacked too high against us. Two boys just out of middle school have no chance of making it on their own in the world! Where do you propose we stay? How do you propose we afford food and clothing? What about education? Or our friends?"
"We can deal with that as it comes!"
"I can't accept that, Eddy! We'll never make it if we don't have a plan for survival!"
"Man, nothing's good enough for you, is it, Double-D?"
Silence. Edd wasn't certain if Eddy expected a response, but the biting tone in his voice had startled him into a speechless state, anyway. It was a few moments before Eddy spoke again - this time in a calmer, more resolute tone.
"Listen up. I can't afford to waste time arguin' with you. If my parents catch me talkin' to you after what just happened, I'll never hear the end of it." Edd cringed, feeling a sharp pang of guilt, as Eddy continued. "So here's the deal, Sockhead. I'm leavin' here now, but I'll be at our junkyard hideout. Half an hour."
Edd blinked, uncertain as to what Eddy's last words meant. "... Half an hour?"
"Yeah. Whether you show up or not is up to you. Either way, I'm outta here."
Edd's heart skipped a couple of beats. Would Eddy really leave him...? To deal with this alone...? And after he'd confessed so much?
"Oh, and Double-D?"
"Y-yes, Eddy...?" he managed to stammer, his raspy voice barely above a whisper.
"... If you ain't comin' along with me, don't bother to show. If you really love me, the least you can do is let me escape from this place without havin' to deal with one of your lectures, all right?"
Edd blinked. Escape...?
"Thirty minutes. Your choice. Make it fast."
Edd was startled by a 'click' and the dial tone following it.
Eddy sighed as he hung up the phone. Maybe he was being harsh on Double-D... but, really... if the guy really had such deep feelings for him, he shouldn't care about the odds, right?
Grabbing a duffle bag from his closet, Eddy quickly stuffed in some clothes and other necessities. Reaching under his bed for a can of hair gel, he blinked as his hand hit something smooth and flat. Bringing it out to examine what he'd caught hold of, he smirked as his eyes glanced over one of his old magazines.
"Don't really need this anymore," he muttered with a bit of amusement in his eyes. Truthfully, his brother's magazines had never really done anything for him, anyway... but it had been a good way to keep everyone else from from knowing who held his true affections. Why else would he keep the collection a not-so-secret secret? People were such saps.
Eddy shrugged and hid the magazine back under his bed before finally locating his hair gel and stuffing it into his bag. After grabbing some food from the kitchen and stuffing every last pocket in the duffle bag full - hey, who knew how long he'd be without ways of getting food? - he returned to his room and, with a final look around to make sure he'd missed nothing, he headed out through his backyard and headed for the junkyard.
Edd slowly placed his phone back on it's base, the normally soft 'click' seeming to resonate louder than usual. Walking up to his window, he gazed outside at the setting sun. It was a beautiful sunset... one he'd much rather be watching with Eddy.
"I could be," he reminded himself. He could simply pack his belongings and meet him in the junkyard. It sounded so simple... so easy. But, by doing so, I'll be leaving behind my family and friends... perhaps for good. Edd jumped, his thoughts bringing to mind something he'd never considered before now.
What about Ed?
Edd wrung his hands with anxiety as he paced his room. Even if he did decide to give up his life here... how would dear Ed cope once he's discovered that his two best friends - his only friends - have just suddenly left him? For seemingly no reason? And without so much as a goodbye?
"I... I can't do it..." Wrapping his arms tightly around himself in an effort to comfort himself, Edd sat wearily on his bed. There was just too much to lose... too many people to hurt for the sake of his own happiness. He could never bring himself to be so selfish...
Edd hung his head in weary defeat. "I'm sorry, Eddy... I can't..."
