Chapter Five
Jocelyn Reads too Much into It

Breakfast the following morning was spent in silence as I shared some eggs and sausage with William and Elizabeth. I knew he was still upset at me for asking him to move the dinner only to find I would be spending the evening with Jack. However, somehow the silence was different, more of he didn't know what to say rather than not wanting to say anything at all.
"So did you enjoy dinner last night?" Elizabeth asked before taking a bite of her omelette. I looked up from my barely touched plate and she smiled. "Mr. Merryweather seemed quite nice."
"Even if he is boring," I added, thinking briefly of the dinner then of Jack and how he helped me climb through the second floor window into my room only an hour before, and I smiled a little. William cut his eyes at me through his dangling locks and I was surprised to watch his stern look melt into an amused expression.
"He is kind of boring, isn't he?"
The old William Turner was back! "And those terrible jokes he makes?" I giggled. "Does someone encourage him?"
"No one is cruel enough to tell him not to make another one of us suffer." - he laughed and the sound of it was nice. It was good not to be at odds with him anymore. "Listen, Jocelyn, about my behavior the past few days...well, I should have trusted your judgement and if you think seeing Jack will make you happy then I will keep my worries to myself. Both of you deserve a little more happiness in your lives and who am I to try and prevent that?"
"Oh you mean it?"
He nodded and the overwhelming urge to smother him with the biggest hug imaginable came over me...so I did. It felt wonderful to be friends again and it was even better knowing he was going to respect my decisions again.
"Have you written your father?" he asked suddenly, a look of worry crossing his face. "I had told him you would write as soon as you arrived."
The change to the particular subject tightened my chest and I retook my seat next to him. I could never be rid of Father no matter how far away I was from him. "Yes, almost a month ago. I told him of Jack in so many words and I'm a bit worried he won't believe I'm being serious."
William's face fell. "You didn't say he was a pirate...did you?"
"Of course not but I did-"
The kitchen door swung open to reveal Richard silhouetted against the bright morning sun cascading through the large front windows; he was holding a yellowed envelope in his hand, his hat in the other, and he smiled. "Pardon me but I have a letter for Miss Jocelyn."
William motioned for him to step further inside and he handed me the letter. "It's from your father, Miss. It's dated the day you arrived."
Thanking him I took the letter, surprised to be getting a letter from him so soon. I opened it quickly, anxious to know what he had to say that was so important after my departure.
"What's it say?" Elizabeth asked, sounding just as anxious as I was feeling.
"My dearest Jocelyn, I hope this reaches you soon and you are having a wonderful time in the Caribbean with William and Elizabeth. Be sure and tell them I send my best wishes. I write because I have wonderful news to tell you. An old friend of yours has recently paid a visit to me and we had the nicest chat. Do you remember Adrian Brody?"- I glanced at William and he smiled. The two of us used to pull pranks on him as children since he was older than either of us, and I even liked him until he moved away to Bath. "After a long talk he asked for your hand in marriage."
I dropped the paper, unable to breathe anymore, and William took the letter, finishing it for me. "Isn't it wonderful? Of course I agreed, giving him my best wishes, and sent this letter right away. Now I know this will take a month or so to reach you and another month for your return but it is well worth the wait. I miss you dearly already and look forward to your return. Don't forget to invite your cousins to attend the wedding; I'm positive they will want to see such an exciting day in your life. All my love, Father."
The both looked at me; I could feel their eyes, sad and sympathetic. "Fancy that," Elizabeth started, taking the letter from Will's grasp and folding it carefully. "You've solved your problem with Merryweather."
"You're not helping," I muttered before excusing myself. I had to see Jack; I had to let him know, so I hurried from the estate, the letter gripped tightly in my sweaty palm, and to his ship hoping to find him there. Thoughts of returning home to London raced through my head as I scurried through the port. I loved England dearly and wanted to return yet thoughts of a life with Jack in the Spanish Main raced right alongside that love for my old home. Adventure had always been frowned upon by my family, even more so since Mother had left years ago, and living out my days with a pirate seemed, while exciting to me, a disgrace to my father. Meanwhile a future with Adrian just looked full of fancy dinners and fancy parties for our mundane anniversaries and birthdays. Finally reaching his ship I climbed aboard and rushed to the captain's quarters. "Jack? Jack are you in there? I must speak with you."
"Over 'ere, luv."- I looked behind me and he was lying on the deck, a bottle of rum lying half empty nearby and his arms bent toward the sky. He sat up resting himself on his elbows and smiled drunkenly. "Ye read me mind. I was jus' about to come see ya."
I hurried to him and took a seat beside him as he sat straight up, taking me into his arms and kissing me deeply. For a moment I lost all thought, allowing myself the pure joy of being in his arms. After awhile, however, the thoughts pushed themselves back into my head, and I pulled away, thrusting the letter against his chest. His brow furrowed as he looked at it with intrigue, leaning back a bit. He then took it and glanced over it before looking back at me with a slight wobble. "You came all th' way out 'ere to give me this?"
Confusion fell over me before that pang in my chest hit me as it had done the night before. "You didn't even read it, did you? It's horrible news from my father, Jack."
"'orrible news?"- he glanced it over again, his eyes squinting and a pained looked crossing his face. It suddenly dawned on me.
"You can't read..."
"I can read," he defended, scratching absently at his suntanned chest. I smiled at him and motioned toward the letter.
"Then recite the first line."
"Why should I?"
"See? You're dodging me, Jack. Just recite it and I'll believe you."
"All right all right," he murmured and, pursing his lips some, added, "I can't read, 'appy?"- he looked at me, blinked a few times, then placed a hand to my arm. "What's this bad new you 'ave? Someone die?"
"Might as well," I answered quietly. "Father has called me back to London."
But for some reason I couldn't tell him why, almost as if I was too afraid to admit it, even to myself. "I don't want to worry about it anymore. Dwelling on it makes me ever so angry."- I looked him in the eyes, an idea suddenly forming in my head, and I smiled. His face fell and he shook his head, the many chains of beads shaking with his windblown hair and my smile only broadened as I tugged gently on his braided beard.
"Oh no," he said, quickly, getting up and swaggering toward his quarters. "You ain't teachin' me how to read. I gone this far without learnin' so why stop now, savvy?"
"But Jack," I protested, running after him. "How will you read the letters I write from London if I do decide to go back? Let me teach you; at least just enough to let you figure out the rest on your own."
"No."
"No one will have to know..."
He glanced over his shoulder but was still firm in his answer. "All right then," I continued, catching sight of his bottle of rum. "Don't let me teach you and I throw all your rum overboard while you sleep tonight."
The door of his quarters opened and he bowed low as I passed him.

"You're not even trying."
Jack lifted his head from its buried position in his arms and grimaced. "An 'ole four hours is passed and I only learned a few sentences outta that letta there. It's 'opeless, luv."
"Nothing's hopeless, Jack, now pay attention."
His shoulders drooped as he peered over the table at the letter in the middle then looked back at me. "I'tis when those words are a blur from 'ere."
"Then scoot closer to me; it may be a little better that way anyway."
Jack smirked, scooting his chair around the table to sit next to me, and slid his arm around my back. A nervous feeling rippled through my stomach, still getting used to the feel of his touch, and it only intensified when his chin came to rest on my shoulder, his cheek grazing my own. "Aye, this is better."
"Jack Sparrow, pay attention," I scolded playfully, looking at him from the corner of my eyes. "Let's try this again. Read the first sentence."
He sighed and pulled the letter closer, squinting his eyes a little, attempting to focus. "My dear...."- he grunted with frustration. "My dear- dearest Jos....Jocelyn, I 'ope teh...teh-heh..."
Glancing at me he raised an eyebrow. "Wha's that one again?"
I had hoped he would've remembered the rule but over the past four hours I had begun to realize Jack had the attention span of a small boy. "Now remember that the 't' and the 'h' combine to make..."
He sighed heavily and relaxed against me, murmuring something about not remembering, and I looked at him. "Let's take a break, luv. I'm gettin' tired."
I was about to protest but I was getting quite tired myself and glancing at the letter, reading the last few sentences, I began to recall why I had come to see Jack in the first place. "So what do you think about me going back to London?"
"What's so important about London?" he asked before kissing my neck, his hand grasping my own, but not even the feel of his warm skin could ease the ill feelings I was beginning to develop. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves a little as his other hand rubbed at my back.
"Father found me a suitor; that is what's important."
"A suitor?"- he leaned back and narrowed his eyes. "You mean them bloody rich chaps that marry just for social...whatcha-callit? Status?"
"Yes..."
Jack nodded and I tightened my grip on his hand, leaning closer to him and capturing his lips softly with my own. "Well, Jack. Is there a reason I should stay here in the Caribbean?"
He didn't answer for the longest time; he only stared into my eyes, studying them it seemed, before he pulled away with a scoff and strolled casually over to a case full of gold chalices and other rather expensive looking trinkets. "Is there?" he asked back, looking down at the dressing on his hand and picking at the now dirty cloth and I had the sudden urge to slap him. Was he telling me the past month was all one big lie? My face burned with anger as I watched him, my fists clenching, and he turned to look at me, scratching at his bandana. "Listen, Jocelyn, I'm-"
"You're a pirate and I'm a lady, is that it? You don't want to try anymore because I have a rich suitor waiting for me?"
"No, Jocelyn-"
A loud thump from outside cut him short and he quietly rushed to me, clamping a hand over my mouth and leaning close to my ear. "Shh."
It remained deadly silent as we waited for what seemed like hours. I felt Jack's muscles go taut as muffled voices could be heard just outside the door.
"....sure? It's gettin' awful late and what if ol' Jack's in there, eh? Don't know 'bout you, but the ol' brute's got some spunk in his sword fightin' skills."
"Who are they?" I whispered against his palm but he only shushed me again and pulled me toward the window. The voices continued to talk, mentioning Jack every so often as Jack opened the window and hoisted me out onto a small ledge, following close behind me. He then threw a rope over the side down to the dock and, wrapping an arm around me, slid down the rope.
"'ey! There he is!" a man cried, pointing our direction. I froze, as did Jack for a moment, but he soon tugged at my arm, starting us on a fast run. "He's got a lass with 'im! Catch 'em both and we get double!"
"Who are they, Jack?" I demanded again, struggling to keep up with his running strides. He didn't answer but instead jerked me into an alley nearby that was barely big enough to fit either of us width-wise and I leaned against the cool stone, breathing hard. "Jack?"
The pursuing men darted past the alley, missing us completely, and Jack looked out, making sure everything was clear before helping me back out into the sunlight. "Bloody pirates," he muttered, dusting off his jacket then looking back at me, placing his hand to my shoulder but I jerked away from him, unable to take the feel of hands on me anymore. If he didn't want me to stay then I wasn't going to allow him to string me along anymore.
"Fine," he bit, clenching his fists at his sides and narrowing his eyes at me. I returned the look and his lips twitched a bit before finally finishing what he had wanted to say. "You've got ye'self a suitor back in jolly old England so why don't you go ahead and leave."
"Fine!"
"Fine! I only save y'life and show ye the most kindness I've given to anyone and this is 'ow you repay me."
"Oooo, you're intolerable, Captain Jack Sparrow! I don't know what I ever saw in you to begin with!"
But I did know; I knew exactly what I saw in Captain Jack Sparrow that no one else seemed to see. He was everything I had ever wanted in someone, everything I had loved, and I loved him. Somewhere deep inside my heart and in my soul I knew I loved him but he had just made me so angry and had hurt me so bad with his nonchalant attitude toward the past month that I whirled around, not looking one last time at him, and stormed back to the estate, tears pooling in my eyes and spilling onto my cheeks. I burst through the front door, sobbing and crying and finally collapsing from the painful tears wracking my entire body. Penny hurried from the kitchen and to my side, asking me what was the matter but I couldn't form words, I couldn't believe what was happening, and I wanted desperately to have Jack to soothe the horrible feeling that was forming in my chest once again.
"Jocelyn?"
It was William but I could barely recognize him through the bleary, hot tears masking my eyes as he knelt before me and I threw myself against him, needing his comfort.
"She won't say what's the matter, Master William," I heard Penny explain as I felt her hand rubbing at my shaking back. "She came through the front door just a'crying her eyes out."
With some effort William stood, bringing me up with him, but I refused to loosen my grip for fear of losing him again, too. He led me up the stairs and to my room, laying me down on my bed and taking a seat beside me and I rolled over and buried my face into my pillow. "Now Jocelyn," he started softly, gently rubbing my arm up and down and the simple motion helped to soothe me a little. "What happened that's gotten you so worked up? This isn't about Adrian, is it?"
"He doesn't love me," I sobbed, a fresh rain of tears streaming across my face.
"Of course he does, the two of you have-"
"No, Jack. Jack doesn't love me."- my whole body started to shake upon hearing myself say those words and I began to sob again, gripping my pillow ever harder.
"What...? I thought...did he tell you this?"
I rolled over to face him, wiping my eyes roughly, not caring if my eye makeup smeared all over my face, and I shook my head. "I asked him if he wanted me to stay...if there was a reason for me to stay and he just asked me the same question back with a scoff."- the lump in my throat began to clog my words and I swallowed hard, sitting up. "I thought we shared something, William. I really thought we shared something special...but he told me to go back to 'jolly old England' and marry Adrian."
William's brow furrowed as his fingers ran across the curve of my neck then shifted his eyes to me. "And your locket? Did you give that to him before all this happened?"
"What?"
I reached up only to feel bare skin and I clawed at the nakedness before letting my hand drop back to my lap. It must have come off when I had jerked away from him... "I must have lost it," I murmured softly, picking at a fingernail. I gazed back up at him and he smiled warmly, brushing a stray lock of hair behind my ear before letting his hand rest on the side of my face.
"Don't worry, Jocelyn," he reassured me, the sound of his voice calming me. "It'll be all right."- I grabbed his hand and held it tightly within both of my own, thankful he was there.
"I want to go back to London," I said quietly, resigning to the expectations I had previously disregarded for what was to be forever. "Adrian must be anxious to have me back."
William nodded, glancing at Penny who had been standing at the door the entire time, then moved to leave. Penny dragged my trunk from my closet and began to fold my dresses, talking softly in an attempt to cheer me up but I couldn't get my mind away from Jack. He was probably already raising anchor and getting ready to sail away from Port Royale and away from me as I was getting ready to sail away from him...