AN: okay I know what you're thinking, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN WITH THIS DAMN
CHAPTER!!!! And I'm really sorry it has taken me this long but there were
three things that contributed to it:
1. My Third Term started and I had sooooooooo much work, tour and a hell of a lot of homework, plus my mother cut down my comp time, I had like 1-2 hours a week unless it was for school.
2. My life was really crap, and lets just say I have a bit more insight into my story than before.
3.And lastly I had Major writers block so I was really screwed, I must have hand written this chapter 10-12 times and not one seemed right.
Now without further ado here is my completed chapter Yeah.
Thanks Angel.
Chapter Three
Explanations and Understanding
I couldn't understand what was wrong with my son, why had he gone crazy when I went to see him. Why had it happened with me and not with his friends? I mean for heavens sake I was his father. I had been asked to leave by the doctors when they came running in, they said the any 'undue stress' could cause him to fall into a coma. His friends were still in there with him ad I'm stuck outside. It's not right, Damnit, it's not right. What was wrong with my son, what had pushed him to do this? He has everything his heart could desire, why would he be unhappy?
Charlie and Jesse are here. They are sitting by my bed. Once the doctors had calmed me down, they left us alone. I had panicked when I saw my father. I couldn't face his disappointment, again. That's all I had ever done with him disappoint him. I had never been able to live up to his standards and that hurt, cause he already had the perfect son, I had to live up to his accomplishments, and surpass them. And doing that was impossible we were too different. He was a straight A student, and he didn't even have to try, brilliant Athlete, attentive son, and was friend with 'all the right kids'. Well at least that's how my dad saw it. I worked really hard to get my A's and worked really hard a hockey, but because of this I never had time to try anything new. I wasn't attentive to my fathers every wish and I was friends with the ducks, and from the feedback I've gotten from my father, he didn't like that. I had always been a disappointment and I always will be.
'What am I gonna do now?' I thought to myself, as I heard Charlie calling my name.
"Adam." "Adam ." I called again for the 5th time.
"Yeah" he answered absently
"We wanna know why?" I said, "We need to know why! I can only imagine how hard this is on you, but you need to let us in let us help you, please talk to us."
He choked, "Oh, God Charlie," he was near tears "I can't take it anymore, I can't deal with his disapproval, his disappointment. It's too hard. I have dealt with them for years, and I can't do it anymore!"
I was crying, he was as well, and I'm sure if I had looked at Jess he would have been to. I hated to see my friend, who'd helped me through so much, in so much pain.
Luckily Jesse took over while I collected myself, he leaned over and hugged Adam and soothed him, made him relax abit.
"Adam," he said through a tear soaked voice, "he loves you, so do the rest of your family. And more than anything else man, we love you, the ducks love you, your one of us, and remember duck's fly together."
"Adam, your our best friend we couldn't deal with it if we lost you, you mean too much to us, your our partner, our friend and most importantly our brother. We wouldn't be able to live without you. You complete us. The terrific trio. Hell on the ice and off of it. Together till the end, remember that. We promised we'd be together to the end, and I'll be damned if we don't!" and it's with that I joined the embraced, we must have been like that for 5 minutes, before a hoarse voice from behind us, called out
"Adam."
We turned and saw Adams father and looked back at Adam. He met our eyes and nodded. So Jesse and I embraced him once more and then we left the room leaving Adam alone with his father.
*******************
I looked into my dad's eyes. There were lots of emotions in them the most prominent. Concern and ..............love? That was a surprise for me, and I broke down crying, again. He rushed up to my side and started hugging me. I was so upset. He's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, this became my new mantra. I finally stopped crying, he let me go and sat back on my bed a bit. He looked me in the eye and asked the one question I dreaded to hear from his lips.
"Why?" His voice was strangled and his eye's looked distraught.
"Because." I trailed off.
"Because." I started again, "I couldn't deal with disappointing you again, it's all I ever do, and I wanted to make your life easier, leave you with a perfect family, with no blemishes to the name, no-one to ruin your reputation. I have never lived up to your expectations; I've always fallen short. Harper has always overshadowed me. And I can't deal with it anymore, I need to get out of his shadow, and seeing as how I could never do anything better than him, I wanted to die. I needed to get out, to leave my life and finally have peace. Sometime when I wasn't working madly to prove myself and could relax."
I dropped my eyes. I couldn't believe I had just said all of that. He's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, and I reverted to my new mantra. I slowly raised my eyes and looked at my father. He was staring at me in disbelief. I dropped my eyes again, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me. I felt his finger underneath my chin, slowly raising it so that I was looking into his eyes.
"I'm sorry," He said, and I was confused, "I'm so sorry. I didn't know you felt like this I always thought you loved your life, I thought you were happy. I was wrong, and I'm so sorry I didn't realise it." He leaned down and pulled me into a hug, cause I couldn't move very far from the restraints. "We'll work on this, Adam, I promise, we'll help you get better. I couldn't deal with loosing you. I love you."
With that he got up and walked out of the room, presumably to find my mom, but I really didn't care, and for once I fell back onto the bed and to sleep in peace, happy.
*******************
AN/ Right well there it is, hoped you like it, I could use your feedback. I'll work quickly on the next chapter and I'll get it up soon I promise. This hasn't been beta'd by my wonderful beta, Dana, because I wanted to get it up as fast as possible.
Review Responses:
andie: there we go, hehehe
Adriana3: Hey there we go hoped you enjoyed.
melodie: thank you very much and I did, but sorry it took so long
crazy4nc128: Oh My God your review was so nice thank you so much, did you really think he wouldn't live, hehehe. Yeah right I couldn't part with my fave character, lol. By the way I've read all your stories and I think your great, and I love your righting so your review means a hell of a lot to me thanks.
Dana: Yeah I know, and don't worry about the ques, I'm the same, yeah I new about her, and I love her in your stories by the way. Sorry I didn't send you this chap to beta but I really wanted to get it up quick.
anne: yeah I know, thanks, and I'm sorry this was so long in coming! ( Jess: thanks for the help it was really appreciated it and I love Adam and I think that with the way he's treated he HAS to have a low self-esteem so I thought why not show that to others. Hope you enjoyed this story.
1. My Third Term started and I had sooooooooo much work, tour and a hell of a lot of homework, plus my mother cut down my comp time, I had like 1-2 hours a week unless it was for school.
2. My life was really crap, and lets just say I have a bit more insight into my story than before.
3.And lastly I had Major writers block so I was really screwed, I must have hand written this chapter 10-12 times and not one seemed right.
Now without further ado here is my completed chapter Yeah.
Thanks Angel.
Chapter Three
Explanations and Understanding
I couldn't understand what was wrong with my son, why had he gone crazy when I went to see him. Why had it happened with me and not with his friends? I mean for heavens sake I was his father. I had been asked to leave by the doctors when they came running in, they said the any 'undue stress' could cause him to fall into a coma. His friends were still in there with him ad I'm stuck outside. It's not right, Damnit, it's not right. What was wrong with my son, what had pushed him to do this? He has everything his heart could desire, why would he be unhappy?
Charlie and Jesse are here. They are sitting by my bed. Once the doctors had calmed me down, they left us alone. I had panicked when I saw my father. I couldn't face his disappointment, again. That's all I had ever done with him disappoint him. I had never been able to live up to his standards and that hurt, cause he already had the perfect son, I had to live up to his accomplishments, and surpass them. And doing that was impossible we were too different. He was a straight A student, and he didn't even have to try, brilliant Athlete, attentive son, and was friend with 'all the right kids'. Well at least that's how my dad saw it. I worked really hard to get my A's and worked really hard a hockey, but because of this I never had time to try anything new. I wasn't attentive to my fathers every wish and I was friends with the ducks, and from the feedback I've gotten from my father, he didn't like that. I had always been a disappointment and I always will be.
'What am I gonna do now?' I thought to myself, as I heard Charlie calling my name.
"Adam." "Adam ." I called again for the 5th time.
"Yeah" he answered absently
"We wanna know why?" I said, "We need to know why! I can only imagine how hard this is on you, but you need to let us in let us help you, please talk to us."
He choked, "Oh, God Charlie," he was near tears "I can't take it anymore, I can't deal with his disapproval, his disappointment. It's too hard. I have dealt with them for years, and I can't do it anymore!"
I was crying, he was as well, and I'm sure if I had looked at Jess he would have been to. I hated to see my friend, who'd helped me through so much, in so much pain.
Luckily Jesse took over while I collected myself, he leaned over and hugged Adam and soothed him, made him relax abit.
"Adam," he said through a tear soaked voice, "he loves you, so do the rest of your family. And more than anything else man, we love you, the ducks love you, your one of us, and remember duck's fly together."
"Adam, your our best friend we couldn't deal with it if we lost you, you mean too much to us, your our partner, our friend and most importantly our brother. We wouldn't be able to live without you. You complete us. The terrific trio. Hell on the ice and off of it. Together till the end, remember that. We promised we'd be together to the end, and I'll be damned if we don't!" and it's with that I joined the embraced, we must have been like that for 5 minutes, before a hoarse voice from behind us, called out
"Adam."
We turned and saw Adams father and looked back at Adam. He met our eyes and nodded. So Jesse and I embraced him once more and then we left the room leaving Adam alone with his father.
*******************
I looked into my dad's eyes. There were lots of emotions in them the most prominent. Concern and ..............love? That was a surprise for me, and I broke down crying, again. He rushed up to my side and started hugging me. I was so upset. He's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, this became my new mantra. I finally stopped crying, he let me go and sat back on my bed a bit. He looked me in the eye and asked the one question I dreaded to hear from his lips.
"Why?" His voice was strangled and his eye's looked distraught.
"Because." I trailed off.
"Because." I started again, "I couldn't deal with disappointing you again, it's all I ever do, and I wanted to make your life easier, leave you with a perfect family, with no blemishes to the name, no-one to ruin your reputation. I have never lived up to your expectations; I've always fallen short. Harper has always overshadowed me. And I can't deal with it anymore, I need to get out of his shadow, and seeing as how I could never do anything better than him, I wanted to die. I needed to get out, to leave my life and finally have peace. Sometime when I wasn't working madly to prove myself and could relax."
I dropped my eyes. I couldn't believe I had just said all of that. He's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, and I reverted to my new mantra. I slowly raised my eyes and looked at my father. He was staring at me in disbelief. I dropped my eyes again, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me, he's going to hate me. I felt his finger underneath my chin, slowly raising it so that I was looking into his eyes.
"I'm sorry," He said, and I was confused, "I'm so sorry. I didn't know you felt like this I always thought you loved your life, I thought you were happy. I was wrong, and I'm so sorry I didn't realise it." He leaned down and pulled me into a hug, cause I couldn't move very far from the restraints. "We'll work on this, Adam, I promise, we'll help you get better. I couldn't deal with loosing you. I love you."
With that he got up and walked out of the room, presumably to find my mom, but I really didn't care, and for once I fell back onto the bed and to sleep in peace, happy.
*******************
AN/ Right well there it is, hoped you like it, I could use your feedback. I'll work quickly on the next chapter and I'll get it up soon I promise. This hasn't been beta'd by my wonderful beta, Dana, because I wanted to get it up as fast as possible.
Review Responses:
andie: there we go, hehehe
Adriana3: Hey there we go hoped you enjoyed.
melodie: thank you very much and I did, but sorry it took so long
crazy4nc128: Oh My God your review was so nice thank you so much, did you really think he wouldn't live, hehehe. Yeah right I couldn't part with my fave character, lol. By the way I've read all your stories and I think your great, and I love your righting so your review means a hell of a lot to me thanks.
Dana: Yeah I know, and don't worry about the ques, I'm the same, yeah I new about her, and I love her in your stories by the way. Sorry I didn't send you this chap to beta but I really wanted to get it up quick.
anne: yeah I know, thanks, and I'm sorry this was so long in coming! ( Jess: thanks for the help it was really appreciated it and I love Adam and I think that with the way he's treated he HAS to have a low self-esteem so I thought why not show that to others. Hope you enjoyed this story.
