Insanity is relative. As is logic.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Obtaining Kai's phone number had been easy enough (though Tala had yet to get that idiotic 'Let your fingers do the walking!' slogan for the Yellow Pages out of his head). Actually dialing it, however...

'Stop. Shaking. You. Damn. Fingers.' The redhead glared at the offending digits before snatching up his cordless phone. Glancing once more at where he had scribbled down the ten numbers that would connect him directly to the Hiwatari household, Tala finally plucked up his nerve. Hollow bleeps sounded in the room as the redhead stabbed viciously at the rubbery buttons with his index finger.

As every ring echoed in his ear, he mentally cursed his inability to turn down a freebie. Damn Bryan and his wiles. Damn him to hell and--

"Hiwatari residence, Kai speaking, make it quick."

The sudden interruption to the mechanical drone in his ear with a human voice (cool and disinterested as it was) caught Tala off- guard, and he almost gasped I surprise. Schooling himself, he responded in an equally calm manner. "This is Tala Ivanov."

There was a pause, then, "...And...?"

"And the Lord of the Rings is playing tomorrow morning. A few of last year's players will be there, and instead of training, I thought you should come as well, to get used to your new teammates." Even as he spoke, Tala winced and wrinkled his nose in disgust. That sounded so pathetic, and no doubt Kai would think so to.

True to expectations, when the junior's voice emanated from the phone again, it carried an undertone of sardonic amusement. "Tell me, how exactly is going to the movies a training exercise? Or are you just trying to get out of coaching to go have fun with your friends? If that's the case, don't feel obliged to invite me along as well."

Tala gnashed his teeth in frustration. Offering Kai a free ticket probably wouldn't work as it did with him. "You've already mastered the basics and most of the more advanced techniques. I can't teach you anything else; the rest comes from experience."

"Are you trying to convince me, or yourself?" The younger boy's voice was cutting and nonchalant. It was obvious that the intransigent teenager would be difficult to sway. Another angle was needed.

"Look, all I'm trying to do is make friends. Maybe not even friends, just a healthy relationship," here, Tala silently made a face at the disturbing thoughts that stirred in his mind at those last two words, "between two guys who have to put up with each other for an entire year. Soccer is a team sport, and relies on the mutual understanding between every player."

"You think a movie will accomplish all this?"

"It's a start."

"That is one of the most pathetic excuses I have ever heard of for shirking responsibility. Surely the great Tala Ivanov can invent a better one." Now Kai's voice was definitely sarcastic. "And even if you were to cancel the practice, there's no way in Hell that I'm going into a public place with those peons you call friends."

Bristling at the insult aimed at his comrades, the older youth fought to keep himself from screaming into the mouthpiece of the phone. Calming himself before he could do anything rash, Tala sought for a suitable argument.

"Why are you so reluctant for me to cancel practice? Do you want to spend more time with me or something?"

Bull's-eye.

"W-What the hell are you getting at, Ivanov?"

"Hm?" Tala injected an appropriate amount of innocence into his voice, as he smirked evilly. "Oh, nothing. Just wondering if you have a crush on me..." The captain's heart was beating wildly even before he finished his seemingly off-hand remark. Did Kai have a crush on him, just as he had a crush on Kai? It seemed too abstract to even have a chance at being true. And yet, there had been that little stutter in his voice...

"You're insane. Fine, I'll go. When and where?"

The bluenette's sudden and fairly unexpected response snapped Tala out of his musings as efficiently as a bucket of ice-cold water.

"Odeon Theatre, tomorrow, 9:15 AM to 1:45 PM. We'll meet you in the front entrance."

"Whatever."

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Ivan paced impatiently, weaving unconsciously back and forth through the thick crowd of people eager to spend their last day of March Break watching the latest movie. Disjointed, aggravated mutterings could be heard pouring from his mouth. "...bloody bastard, almost 9, still not here, where the hell could he be?! gonna kill him, so hungry..."

Bryan shook his head in amusement at his friend's antics, before scanning the masses once more for either the distinctive fiery red hair of his childhood comrade, or the unique two-toned blue locks of said companion's crush. Not that either would admit liking each other, of course. With any luck, however, today would change that.

He checked his wallet once more, then his watch. "Ivan," the pale- eyed boy called, "come off it. It's only 8:52, and not even Sergei's here. Tala'll be here soon, and Kai, too. Just... calm down. People are staring."

His indigo-haired friend snapped his head up to shoot Bryan a disgruntled glare. Still cursing under his breath, Ivan reluctantly moved to stand by the older teen's side. Finally, the two became three as Sergei appeared at 8:58.

"They here yet?" the blonde inquired, one eyebrow cocked in curiosity.

"Oh, yes, don't you see them making out in the corner," Ivan drawled sarcastically, his eyes narrowed.

Bryan merely shook his head. "No, they aren't, but they better be soon. And don't mind Ivan, he's having a heart attack."

Indeed, the shorter youth was now twitching spasmodically and glancing every which way in search of Tala and/or Kai. He resembled a squirrel. Sort of.

Sergei sighed, and raised his left hand to gently massage his temples. 'Tala, where are you?'

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

At that very moment, Tala was, in fact, getting dressed. Having already tried on and discarded several outfits, the redhead was no considering a high-necked muscle shirt. Lifting the garment to lie across his tall frame, Tala glanced into the mirror to gauge his appearance. What he saw caused him to snarl in self-disgust.

"Look at me," he said aloud, to the impossibly blue eyes that stared back at him from the glass surface. "Look at me, trying on clothes like an eleven-year-old going out on her first date. I look pathetic."

He threw the shirt to the floor, where it joined its fellows. Groaning as he took in the time from the glowing digital clock on his dresser, Tala grabbed a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. Yanking them on, he forced himself to walk evenly out the door, and onto the streets.

'Stupid Kai. Stupid emotions. What is wrong with me?'

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Kai, on the other hand, was standing in the side-alley across from the Odeon. His cheap Timex timepiece read 9:02, and he'd already pre- ordered a ticket, so lines were hardly a problem. It was just that... he really didn't want to go.

Fidgeting slightly, the bluenette eyed the swinging metal doors on the other side of the street. 'Why am I here? And don't,' he added to the voice in his head that had opened its metaphorical mouth to speak, 'Say it's because I have a crush. Well, I do, but it's nothing important. I think. I hope. Oh, screw this.'

Kai Hiwatari was not a coward.

And there was no way on Earth that he was going to run away like a nervous fangirl.

The crimson-eyed boy strode across the road and entered the building.

End Phase Two.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Ivan glanced up at the huge, advertisement-adorned clock at the front of the Odeon's foyer. 9:03. 12 minutes left. Shifting anxiously, he crossed his arms across his chest and leaned backward into the concession counter he, Sergei and Bryan were standing by. Truth be told, he was more than a little nervous.

The high-school junior had always looked up to Tala, and was prepared to do most anything to make the redhead happy. And being with Kai had a 99 percent chance of doing just that for Ivan's adoptive older brother. That reassurance, however, did nothing to soothe the apprehension in the pit of his stomach.

What if something went wrong? What if Kai hated Tala? What if both chickened out?

Pessimistic and worrying thoughts buzzed about angrily in Ivan's head like so many maddened bees. Their incessant whine was about to drive him insane. Gritting his teeth, the dark-eyed youth regarded the seething mass of moviegoers once more and was rewarded with the sight of two familiar forms making their separate way towards where three friends already waited. One approached from the left, and the other from the right.

Ivan allowed himself a slight smirk of victory.

Begin Phase Three.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

In a way reminiscent of a sea abating after a swell, the gathered crowd bent their heads low in respect for the four diminutive beings that stood before them. The sun glowed warm and bright overhead, illuminating the faces of the heroes, as the music grew to an almost unbearably dramatic height.

Kai tried not to yawn.

It was all too theatrical to be believable, too fake and perfect. The slate-haired teenager had somewhat enjoyed the fighting scenes, when the sky had been darker and the true nature of the human had been given a modicum of screen time. But this, this was just annoying.

Despite Tala's insistence that this would be a team bonding experience, the five Bakuten soccer players were scattered throughout the theatre. They hadn't been able to find more than two seats together, much to Ivan's hidden chagrin; if there had been three empty chairs, he might have been able to arrange it so Tala and Kai sat together. His plan momentarily halted, the shortest one of the group was seated directly behind Bryan.

If one watched closely enough, one could see, by the light of the movie projector, him lean forward and whisper in the older male's ear every so often. The lavender-haired youth, on the other hand, seemed to be getting a little annoyed with his friend's constant intrusions, because as soon as Frodo finished sailing off into the wild blue yonder, he stood to leave.

Eventually, the quintet managed to file out of the packed theatre and out into the blindingly bright synthetic glare of Odeon's entrance. Blinking, Sergei tried to rid his eyes of the flashing migraines they were relaying to his mind. He caught a flash of ebony hair, but thought nothing of it until it was standing directly before him. Only then did he recognize it as Rei Kon (his friends, Mao, Emily, Lai, and the rest of them, waved to him before leaving the theatre).

He didn't, however, recognize the sly look the pony-tailed boy shot his way before turning to Kai Hiwatari, who was attempting to sidle away unnoticed.

"Hey," the Chinese teen practically purred.

Perhaps it was pure chance that nobody noticed the sudden, inexplicable flash of jealousy that appeared in Tala's clear cerulean eyes.

Edging closer, Rei curled his left arm about the bluenette's slender waist, noting the faint flush in said male's cheeks with a lazy, cat- like grin of satisfaction. "So," the golden-eyed youth began, lowering his voice to a more seductive tone, "What are you doing tonight?"

He moved a little closer, not aware of how Kai's body stiffened at his proximity. "Well...?"

A violent shudder ran through Kai's body, but its presence was cut short by the sudden blur of movement that overcame the crimson-eyed boy. A pale hand snapped up in an almost mechanical way to deliver a devastating blow to Rei's lower back. The junior doubled up in pain and surprise, an expression of shock evident on his lightly tanned features. Twisting away from his 'foe,' Kai backed away slowly from the felled teenager, his crimson eyes smoldering.

"Don't ever touch me," he hissed between clenched teeth.

Then he turned. And ran. Away.

End Phase Four...?

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

"That... wasn't supposed to happen."

"Damn right it wasn't, Kiselev," cursed Rei from his prone position on one of the benches outside the theatre. "And you still owe me ten bucks. Though I think we should up it to twenty due to injury. Jeez, why didn't you tell me he had a problem with contact? And why did I have to do this anyway?"

Bryan exhaled noisily, all the tension of the morning leaving his body in one fell swoop. He leaned forward on his crutches, taking care not to overbalance, and hushed his voice, so that his words would reach Rei, but not Tala, who stood a ways away. "We're trying to get Tala and Kai together. Ivan figured that if we made Tala jealous, he might ask Kai out or something. It didn't really work out that well, though."

Rei snorted. "Did you really expect it to? Kai doesn't really seem the sort to be into relationships." He shifted to relieve some of the pressure on his back. "Ow. I've got to get home."

"You live near me, want me to walk you back?"

"Walk me back, Bryan? You can barely move on your own!"

"Hey, I wasn't the one who got creamed."

"I didn't get creamed, he just caught me off-guard."

"Whatever you say, cat."

Ivan watched the two move off, still bantering, and grinned slightly. 'Oh, well. If Operation Tala/Kai doesn't work out by the end of the school year, maybe Operation Bryan/Rei will.'

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

To be Continued

Eeeh. I estimate there to be two chapters left. Or three. Don't worry, you'll get your TalaKai eventually. It just seems more natural this way, thassall. Really.

Don't eat me.

Oh, did you know that moviegoers is actually a word? And that screentime isn't? Weird.

That phrase thing in the last chapter means, 'Goodbye, my friends.' Amici is the male word for friends, and amicae is the female. Just like ami and amie, I suppose. It's classical Latin.

Stork: 'Shit doesn't just happen... it's caused by arseholes.' Aye, words of wisdom, me 'earties. XD

Kiina: *hands Kiina a jack-in-the-box monkey* Aw, man, I wanted to keep that. Alas. Yep, Latin. Classical Latin, actually. Bloody evil subject it is, too. My teacher has this really nasally, annoying voice, and, and, and, it's just wrong. Yeah.

Kitsune: It's classical Latin, but French and Italian sorta stem from it, so you're partially right. So, you get, a, um, half jack-in- the-box monkey? Oo

Phoenix the 1st: Aye! Especially since they can't protest.

Yoink Daydurfrits: I find Kai's journal entries to be the most fun to write. Too many times I read of him as some sort of SuperMan character, with the perfect mind, and the perfect body, and all that, and I think people are forgetting that although he's just a character, he's human. And humans are flawed, every one of us. The journal lets me explore that and share my insights with you in a more expressive way than mere writing. Ah, they'll hook up. I think. *laughs nervously*

Vialana: That is darn high praise there. I hope I can live up to it. Romance be special. Nobody can resist it! Nobody! Mwa ha ha ha ha! Thanks for your review, and your compliments. Especially your compliments. (Can you tell that I'm a complete egotist?)

Trinity of the Phoenix: But if I did that, I'd have to end the story sooner, and then I'd have to abandon my Kai and Tala torturing! I can't do that! *weeps pathetically*

Midnight Insanity: From past experience, I can tell you that it's much easier to cackle sitting on the floor. That way, you don't destroy the drama by falling down. You know Spanish? You must teach me. I'm horrible at languages. Quite good at mangling them, though. You're stalking my story? It feels loved. XD

Lilmatchgirl: *points wildly* THERE BE REI!! HA HA!! *races off in search of the neko-jin*

Lyn/Lin: I lost five percent on my paper because my 'Laurier' looked like 'Laurent,' and 'in conclusion' came out looking like 'I'm confusing.' Kai's writing worse than mine? Highly improbable. Pity my English teacher.

Shadows of Grey: Eeeh. Your school sounds scary. oO *quivers in fear* Hey, I suck at languages, too! Gimme five! *misses* ...Piff. Anyway. I have a flag? Wow. That's cool. I'm hoping it's not a stick with a white cloth tied on the end, though. Blushing... giggling... Kai. *twitches* Excuse me. *leaves the room. A shrill scream of terror can be heard through the closed door*

Disengage: Probably is. Riggers and nose-pickers, all of them! *grumbles under breath* Poor, poor Bryan, eh? And movie tickets are expensive. Ah, the things we do for love.

The Midnight Shadows: He does! He does! Well, he kinda has it hanging out of his mouth. Still... They're not evil! They're... manipulative! Right!

Shunsoku: Okay. *turns a blind eye to all punctuation* Although, that could screw up my writing. XD Thanks for the comments, they're really appreciated.

Angelgirl10: Don't worry, I get blamed all the time. There's more than enough to go around! *sprinkles blame everywhere* Amazing? Really? I... I feel loved.

Kinau: Eeeh... *thinks* Nope. Voltaire be a doddering old coot. He be gone. Somewhere. Bye bye. Sayonara. XD Plushies? For me? *faints*

Princess of Yaoi: Can I be the maidservant of yaoi? *laughs* Thanks for the fav! Sadly, we don't get to see much of Tala in the first season. Mainly, him smirking and gloating. And losing. But we'll ignore that. With any luck, G-Rev will have lots of our favourite redhead.

Silverjustice1: Well, life imitates art! Or is it the other way around? Feh. Ignore my unknowledgeable use of clichés. Very confusing life, ya got there. I like my simple, nonexistent life. It's so happy. *prances around* The phases strike me as ironic. I mean, they're so computerish and technologically related, you really can't imagine them to be related to something as human and emotional as love. Okay, that's enough analysis. Sorry, I don't do IM. It just... bugs me. I don't know; I ended up uninstalling MSN after a couple months. The bleeping... *cowers* *screams* Make it stop!!

Artemis347: You're welcome. Yeah, poems are fuuuuuun. You can blame their lack of goodness on the fact that you have to make every line fit. Excuses are great. Oh, Tala suspects all right. But he really doesn't have a choice, now does he? *snickers evilly*