Chapter 10

Oh, joy! I've hit the double digits!!!

Disclaimer: Joss Whedon. Mutant Enemy. Various writers, directors, gaffers, producers, best boys, camera people, makeup artists, lighting techs, stunt coordinators, fight choreographers, special effects techs, etc. etc. etc.

            BUT CASSIE AND MISS FORD (and others associated with their reality) ARE ALL MINE!!!!!

Rating: PG, as usual. Kids, get you parents to read this over your shoulder. (Just kidding)

Sunnydale, California 1954

            "Hey, you," Buffy said to the tied and gagged teenagers before her. "I'm here to save you." She cringed inwardly, noting how corny that sounded. Note to self: get more heroic lines. She began to cut the ropes of the girl closest to her with the Swiss army knife she always kept with her. Her skirt had no pockets, but she had kept it tied inside it by the little chain thing it came on.  If Principal Snyder ever finds it on me, I am so expelled, she thought. Then, I wonder if there really is a Swiss Army. Do they actually use these things? How come I can't buy a Swiss Army hand grenade? Oh, no…stay on task, Buffy.

            She finished with the ropes of the first girl and didn't even bother wasting time on the gag. The girl could pull it off herself, later.

            "Run," Buffy ordered, and the girl did as she was told.

            Buffy watched her for a moment, then moved on to the next prisoner.

***

Sunnydale, California 1999

            "Giles?" Cordelia called from the library table, trying to keep her balance. "Is there supposed to be an earthquake here?"

            "Probably not," Giles answered. Apocalypses failed to amaze or terrify him anymore. All he needed to do to solve the problem was read his books—

            "Giles, what if the floor cracks open?"

            —if he didn't keep getting interrupted.

            "Then find something to plug it up with, Cordelia," he answered flatly, turning the page. "And while you're at it, do find something to plug up your mouth with, too."

            There was a pause, then…

            "Giles, did you just insult me for, like, the fifth time today?"

            "I suppose so."

            There was a small silence in which Cordelia broke into a grin. "There may be hope for you yet."

***

Sunnydale, California 1954

Buffy cut the third prisoner free and sent her running off into the woods. She moved on to the last one, but was stopped by a vampire.

"You have taken the others," he said. "You will not take this one."

"Hel-lo? People here, not fast food. And why is this one so important anyway?"

"It doesn't matter to you, human. Soon, nothing will matter."

"Doesn't sound promising. I assume you weren't saving these people as snacks for the post-apocalyptic battle party?"

"They were going to be turned," said another vampire, coming up behind the first.

"Erika, you moron, you just ruined the entire plan," the first vampire said, sounding extremely irritated.

"Oh, it's not like they wouldn't have figured it out anyway."

"Thanks for the tip, guys," Buffy said sweetly, staking them quickly, one after the other. "I really appreciate—"

"Fight now, talk later," Cassie said, grabbing Buffy's Swiss Army knife from her other hand and cutting the last would-be victim free.

"Got it," Buffy said, dashing over to help out. Willow had managed…nothing magical, but she was repeatedly whacking a vampire while she waited for an opportunity to stake it. Miss Ford was holding her own, and Angel was taking on two vamps at a time. Buffy staked one as she passed, and got a brief grateful look from Angel

She practically dove into a group of chanting demons, hoping whatever magic they were conjuring wouldn't kill her. It didn't. But she would have a hard time explaining the teal-tinted skin to Mom. Hopefully it would wash off. If it didn't…oh well, she'd worry about that later. Right now it was all about the fight.

***

Sunnydale, California 1999

"GIII-LLLEEESS!!!" Cordelia screeched, her voice shrill with terror. "Giles! They're here!!!"

Giles hurried over to the library office door, where he saw Cordelia running for the weapons cage and preparing to lock herself in.

"Cordelia, this is no way to behave. You can't save the world from inside the weapons cage."

"Tell that to them," she said, pointing toward the door where five vampires, a horned slime demon, and a black shadowy thing were entering.

"Well, let me in!" Giles cried frantically, locking the weapons cage, shoving his way into it beside Cordelia, slamming the door, and putting the keys on the floor on the other side.

"Get some weapons," he told her. "Hand-to-hand ones are useless, but the crossbows and things should work."

"How am I supposed to kill doom and gloom?!" she asked, pointing toward the shadowy thing. "It looks like arrows or whatever will go right through him. Her. It."

"Don't be fooled," Giles muttered. "It's as corporeal as you or me." He turned to the demon. "Fancy trick, didn't fool us for a second!" The demon shot a spray of yellow liquid toward Giles, who dodged out of the way.

"Ewww, toss your cookies someplace else," Cordelia shuddered, loading the crossbow and taking careful aim. Luckily, the shadow thing was more interested in spitting at Giles than it was in her. She pulled the trigger and the arrow whizzed through the air…straight into the demon's head. It slumped over and fell. Cordelia could not resist cheering for herself, performing a little cheerleading routine while she was at it.

"Cordelia, do smarten up," Giles begged, taking the crossbow from the dancing cheerleader and aiming for one of the vampires, who was stupid enough to stand still and stare at Giles. This ultimately got him dusted.

Another vampire had the nerve to walk right up to the weapons cage. Entwining his fingers through the cage links, he taunted, "Is that the best you got, old man?" He completely ignored the "harmless" dancing cheerleader, who was now dancing her way on over towards a pile of stakes. Giles fumbled for another arrow, but realized he was all out. "Oh no," he groaned, heading for the weapons trunk where the others were stored. "Give me your best shot," the vampire said, laughing. "Oh, no, wait, you can't!" This set him off into hysterical laughter, which stopped abruptly when he noticed the stake sticking out of his chest.

"And surprisingly, that wasn't even my best," Cordelia said. "You must really be bad at this. Perhaps you're in the wrong line of work?"

The vampire glared at her and exploded. Cordelia tossed the stake in the air, attempted to catch it, missed, and watched it fall to the ground.

By now, Giles had reloaded the crossbow. He aimed up toward the stacks, which was a difficult thing to do, considering the angle he was shooting from. The horned slime demon was looking through his books. "Hey, you!" he shouted to the demon, who turned around. "I hope you're willing to pay damage fines on that book." He fired. He hit his mark.

"Where're those last ones?" Cordelia asked.

"Ran away, I suppose," Giles said, trying to get a panorama of his surrounding. Unfortunately, the library cage did not offer a very easy view. He reached for the keys and remembered, too late, that the door did not unlock from the inside. "Oh, how smashing."

"We're stuck in here, aren't we?" Cordelia asked, deflated.

"Yes."

Cordelia looked around frantically, the reality of the situation setting in. "Don't take my air! This is my air, Giles!"

He gave here a dubious look. "Cordelia, we aren't going to suffocate. The cage has openings in between the bars."

"Oh. Right." Cordelia relaxed a little. "So all, we can do is sit here?"

"Ye—no, wait."

"Oh, God. What?"

Giles said nothing, but directed his gaze to the window about five feet above their heads. Cordelia saw it and groaned.

"Oh, Jeez, what will we have to do next?"

***

Sunnydale, California 1954

Buffy delivered a backhand to the right side of her opponent's face, brought her knee up to his stomach, then grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him to the ground, where she promptly staked him.

"Dust to dust, I always say," she chirped at the disintegrating vampire. "No, wait, I don't."

"Go to—" the vampire exploded into a pile of dust.

"No thanks, had a friend who visited there. Apparently it's a nice place to visit, but you wouldn't want to live there." She scuffed at the pile with her flip-flop. She was really beginning to regret her clothing choice for the day. Cassie had offered to lend her some clothes, but they wouldn't have fit anyway, which would have posed similar problems to the ones she was having now.

She didn't have time to think after she heard the terrified scream. Cassie's terrified scream.

*****

Feedback please!!!

I'm gonna write a couple other stories, possibly. Please read and rate them, when they come out, and please read and rate my current story, Cordelia's Diary. Please, please, pretty please? (while I still have some dignity—please!) And email is always appreciated, too, even if you write something stupid like, "Hi. Read your story. Bye." PLEASE???