As Cold as Ice

Nissa woke up suddenly as a hand touched hers, she was freezing to her very soul; but the touch of the hand upon hers seemed to warm her slightly. She turned her head, and smiled slightly to herself at the sight. Sirius was asleep with his head resting on the edge of the bed and his hand in hers; she did feel better knowing that he was there with her.

Everything which had happened suddenly came rushing back as did the dream or what ever it had been, she was a little over whelmed as she tried to slit the two advents; until they both came through clear and separate.

"Sirius." Nissa said, but he didn't wake up.

Nissa moved her hand carefully out of his and pulled it under the covers, he maybe warmer it but she was still freezing cold. She turned over on her side facing the sleeping Sirius; and now wondered if she had done the right thing in saying 'no'. She loved him more then she would even let herself admit to, but now it was so confusing with these dreams or whatever they are; and how she feels in them, how she feels for Severus in them

She tried to think the whole thing over, but she was to cold to think straight; she wished that Sirius would wake up and just hold her in his arms. And then it came back again, she had said 'no' that they couldn't be together; even though that was all she had ever wanted from him. She wasn't bothered if they were married as long as they were together that was enough for her.

Sirius woke up about an hour or so later, he looked at her facing him and smiled realising that she was awake finally; he reached out and touched her still cold face softly.

"You should have woken me." Sirius told her.

She smiled at him softly. "You looked as though you needed the sleep."

They both heard footsteps approaching and looked over towards the door; they were both surprised to see Severus stood there.

"Do you mind?" Sirius said. "I'm sure what ever it is, you can come back later."

Nissa knew why he was there, it was to see her to talk to her; but she still didn't want to talk to him about. And she knew she couldn't talk to Sirius about it without him completely over reacting. Severus nodded slightly and left the two of them alone. Sirius turned back round now that he was gone, and touched her now blue hair.

"How do you feel?" Sirius asked her.

"Drained and very cold." Nissa answered. "Do I have to stay here, or can I go back to my room because it's much warmer there?"

"So I remember." Sirius said smiling, as he got up and grabbed her robe from the end of the bed and handed it to her.

Sirius went to tell Madam Pomfery that they were going back to her room, she wasn't at all happy about it; and wanted her to stay longer so that she could at lest try and figure what had happened to her. But they had both made up their minds, so there was no way in changing it; she finally agreed to let them go as long as Nissa came back tomorrow to see her for a check up.

It was pretty late in the day by now, as Sirius helped Nissa down to her room; they had missed the whole day almost and dinner; which of course Sirius knew that he could always go down to the kitchens for something to eat if they wanted anything.

He helped her into bed and then put some more fire wood into the already hot fire, but it was only for Nissa; he could feel how cold she was and nothing was helping.

After Sirius had finished sorting the room out, he walked round to the other side of the bed and sat down and took his shoes off.

"What are you doing?" Nissa asked him.

"Getting ready for bed, I don't normally sleep with my shoes on; well not in bed anyway." Sirius told her pleasantly.

"I meant what I said this morning." Nissa told him.

Sirius stopped completely what he was doing and turned round to face her.

"So did I." Sirius told her seriously. "An dthat meant something as well, it meant a lot last night. I love you, and I know that you love me too." Sirius got up and walked around. "Why are you doing this to us, to yourself?"

Nissa throw back the covers and got up. "because I love you to much Sirius, if I lose you again I feel as though I'm going to lose myself along with you. Every time I had to let you in, and I lost you; it hurt so much that I couldn't stand it anymore. And then when you came back to me, it was as though you made it all better; but the pain was still there deep down. Because I knew that I would lose you again."

"I never ever meant to hurt you, to leave you." Sirius told her. "And this time I'm not going anywhere, I'm here to stay."

"I still have that feeling." Nissa said quietly. "But...this time I think it could be me."

Sirius stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her. "I'm not leaving you, and you're not leaving me. It seems not even death can keep us apart."

"Sirius..." Nissa started but she wasn't sure how to explain everything to him, so he just held her tighter. She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes, feeling safe and warm there in his arms; wanting to just give into him.

Sirius kissed her softly on her forehead. "Please, just give me this last chance; I know that must be one of the reasons why I'm back here."

Nissa looked up at him, but didn't pull out of his arms. "I'll sleep on it."

"And me?" Sirius asked as he looked down her.

"Well I only do some of the night, not all." Nissa teased smiling at him, he smiled back at her as he let go of her.

Nissa got back into bed as he walked round the other side and finished getting undressed and then throw back the covers and got in along side of her, she moved over and rested her head on his naked chest and wrapped her arms around him; as he pulled the covers over them both and magically turned the lights off.