Unspoken

By: Paints-the-Sky

Disclaimer: I, sadly, don't own The OC, although I wouldn't mind owning Ben Mackenzie ;)

Author's Note: Since I am on a massive revamping rampage, I dedcied "Hell, why not fix the two misspelled words in this one!"

Anyways, I hope you enjoy it just as much as you did the first time. Please R&R!

A lot of unsaid things surrounded Ryan Atwood

He was abused

He was the child of a broken home

He was damaged goods.

He had seen things that even Sandy wasn't sure he wanted to know. He was heavy with emotional baggage that was kept secret, silent, and guarded. These were all unspoken truths.

Sandy had been tempted to read Ryan's file, to see how bad it really was. And Sandy had read it, at least the first few pages.

Broken ribs

Deep bruising

Fractured jaws

Black eyes

Severe hemorrhaging

"Physical Abuse" circled and underlined

"Possible Sexual Abuse" question marked

And along with all injuries there were excuses.

He fell off his bike

He got in a playground fight

Sandy loved this one: He tripped walking home from school. Ryan got three broken fingers and a concussion from tripping over a curb. And these were just the reported cases.

Sandy couldn't look after that. It was just too much.

Sometimes Sandy would catch himself staring at Ryan, wondering how he had survived it all. How he had turned out so well. Sandy never told Kirsten or Seth about it. Hell, Sandy couldn't even bring himself to call "it" what "it" really was, abuse. Kirsten, she had enough to worry about, and Seth, well, Seth was Ryan's best friend, and his brother. He would need to hear this from Ryan, when Ryan was ready. If he was ever ready.

Sandy knew Ryan should be in counseling, in therapy of some sort, but he also knew it would just make Ryan feel like more of an outsider. And Sandy didn't want to make life harder for him that it already was.

Ryan never liked to talk about his past.

He had had some hard times in Chino. End Of Discussion.

Sometimes, well, a lot of times, Ryan liked to pretend none of it ever happened. That he had just magically materialized on the Cohen's doorstep, without any past memories or scars. It was easier that way.

Ryan didn't want anyone, ever, to know about some of the things he had seen. And done.

If the Cohens ever knew about it, they wouldn't want him anymore. Even Seth, who was always said that Ryan's past, that whatever had happened, it didn't matter. That they'd be brothers no matter what. But when it came down to it, Ryan knew words were just words. Seth wouldn't ever forgive him for that.

Sometimes Ryan thought about telling him everything. Just to see his reaction. Just to watch the look of horror on Seth's face has Ryan told him all the gruesome details.

He would tell him about the drinking, the drugs, the fights. He would tell him what it was like to his own ribs crack when one of Dawn's boyfriends threw him against the wall. He would tell him about the things his mom did, the things his mom made him do, for her drug money. He would tell him about what Rick, one of Dawns first boyfriends, did to him one night, while Dawn was passed out.

Ryan didn't like to think about that night.

Ryan wondered a lot if he would ever, could ever tell Marissa.

What if they got married? Could he tell her then? Would she still want him? Would anyone want him if they knew how dirty, how used, how broken he really was? No. Some things are better left unspoken.

End.

Authors Note II: This was just a standalone "thought" piece, but hell, lets just go to town and review it anyways!

PS- TeacherTam, your review on "And Still…" made my day. Even if it was a little whiny J