Part 8
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Despite Gremio's concern that being on the road again would ruin Tir's high spirits, his Young Master seemed cheerful enough as the two of them walked side by side through the forest path. They must be nearly where they'd encountered the Beast Rune before, Gremio thought to himself, and Viktor and Flik were lagging behind after a rather indulgent night - but in the sunlight that melted the last of the first thin snow, the evening of that attack seemed far, far away. The night before had found Gremio lying awake, shivering, but so long as he and Tir continued talking about the preparation of last night's dinner, it stayed only in the back of his mind.
"Nonsense - you provided me with plenty of help," he was telling Tir as they stepped over a small fallen tree. "Although I was startled for a moment when I found that tray of biscuits missing..."
"I thought you had too much to worry about at the moment as it was," Tir told him, "so why not take them out myself? After all, you did train me to take care of myself, and I've done a bit of cooking on my own in your absence."
"I'd be wrong not to teach you how to care for yourself as you grew older, wouldn't I?" Gremio chuckled. "I'm only pleased you took so well to it..."
Tir sighed softly. "I still cannot cook anywhere near as well as you."
"That is an activity that some take to more quickly than others," Gremio pointed out. "But then, you are a much better fighter than I. And you shall have a long time to learn the finer points of cooking."
Reaching out for Gremio's hand, Tir took it and squeezed. "And I will have many years to study from only the very finest chef I know."
Gremio squeezed back, and just smiled again, but with a distracted look in his eyes. More worried than he was letting on, Tir watched Gremio carefully, and did not let go of his hand, as if in hanging on, he could somehow ease the burden. "Just think of all the lessons you'll be able to give me during the Harvest Feast," he suggested. "It's coming up soon, and I'm sure we can find another town by then. Maybe we'll have a whole inn to cook for once again."
"Oh, only a week and a half - indeed, I'd forgotten!" Gremio laughed softly and nodded. "It was... surprisingly pleasant to cook dinner for the inn's patrons yesterday. It's been a long time since I cooked for anyone besides you and I, and perhaps one or two others."
Tir grinned and hummed to himself, an old traveling tune. "Well, if we find a town, and we're permitted, we will create quite a feast."
"We will provide a menu to make kings jealous," Gremio agreed.
Remembering feasts past, Tir grinned. "I will admit to being excited like a child would be at all the festivities and food we will partake in."
Gremio reached over and squeezed him lightly. "It's something to look forward to after all this is finished, certainly. And it will be worth it just to see you at peace..."
Tir nodded thoughtfully; it was true enough that this might all be finished by the time of the annual festival, since they weren't far from L'Renouille. "Gremio..." he began, "do you think someday we might travel to other lands? Places we've never been at all?"
Glancing at him, Gremio laughed again. "It seems Viktor and Flik are perhaps rubbing off on you... But yes, I don't see why we shouldn't."
"Think of all the foods we could learn about that are different than what we know," Tir mused, gazing off into the distance.
Gremio nodded, thinking. "Yes, spices and techniques from places unknown... perhaps I might even improve my stews further. Or simply create new variations." He looked at Tir seriously, for the first time putting two and two together. "All this talk of food, Young Master... would you like to stop for lunch?"
Tir blushed as his stomach grumbled; he'd not even realized how hungry he was. "Yes, yes... I do believe that would be a good idea."
"It is nearly mid-afternoon, after all," said Gremio with a laugh, glancing around. "It seems that Viktor and Flik are lagging a bit behind, after their revelry yesterday. No doubt they'll have caught up by the time I've put something together," he reasoned, leaning his axe against a tree and slipping his pack from his shoulders. "Now let me see..."
Tir dropped his own pack to the ground and flopped down beside it. "I am glad we asked Viktor and Flik to come along. I daresay their antics are as useful as their fighting in many cases. They have dragged me out of gloom several times already."
Gremio grimaced as he looks through his pack. "Perhaps, but I could have gone without a few of the bawdy songs Viktor has bellowed shamelessly. Should we take the time to build a fire and make a meal, Young Master," he interjected, or save it for tonight, when it will be cooler, and we'll have made camp more permanently? I believe some fruit and bread and cheese should be enough for lunch, otherwise."
"Sounds delicious to me," Tir said with a nod, "and I agree that a fire would be more useful when we are planning to stop for a longer amount of time." He paused, smiling and returning to the earlier subject. "Viktor's songs are amusing, but they can be a bit.. ah... crude, at times."
Gremio shook his head. "As I said, shameless... Anyhow, Young Master, this morning before we left town, I purchased pears, apples, grapes, and oranges... would you like to get started with any of those things while I slice the bread?"
Closing his eyes, Tir imagined each fruit in turn, the shape and the color and the taste. "I think I would like a pear, actually," he told Gremio with a grin. "I don't know why, Gremio, but today I rather feel like... like everything will be okay."
Gremio took a pear from the bag of fruit, and nodded as he hand it to Tir. "That's good to hear." Refraining from further comment, he simply returned to looking through the pack, finding a fresh loaf of bread and unwrapping it. Tir could tell he didn't wish to talk about it, and so he fell silent with a frown, starting to eat his pear as they waited for Viktor and Flik to arrive.
Gremio placed the bread on its paper on the ground, taking a sharp knife carefully from within the pack to slice it. The silence was awkward, for all their familiarity, and he searched for something to say. "I suppose I should consult the maps Flik is carrying..." he said at last. "I confess I am not familiar with this area. I imagine, though, that we are near the same place where we were before our unfortunate backtracking to the village..."
"Flik is quite the mapmaker," Tir agreed with a nod. "I wonder if he took lessons from Templeton."
Gremio smiled vaguely, not looking up from his task. "Perhaps, but I'm not sure he'd have called them lessons if so... after all, Flik taking lessons from such a young boy?"
Tir looked up from his pear in surprise. "Gremio, I would think you would understand better than most that knowledge is knowledge regardless of age. I would hope Flik is also a wise enough man to see that."
Looking over to Tir, Gremio nodded apologetically. "I was thinking about that just after I said it, to be honest... how much have I learned from you, Young Master?" In surprise, he looked back down to the bread, and winced slightly as he raised a bleeding thumb to his mouth. "Perhaps I could learn to be less clumsy with a knife," he muttered, knowing full well he'd never had a problem with slicing bread in the past.
"Are you okay?" Tir asked, jumping up and going to Gremio's side. "Do you want me to get something for you? Even just water to clean it off?" He gazed at Gremio steadily, more and more worried about his behavior.
Gremio shook his head. "It's only a little scratch, nothing to worry about," he mumbled around the injured thumb, then removed it from his mouth to peer at it, almost bewildered by his clumsiness. "It doesn't even hurt. In fact, I'm more troubled by the fact that a bit of blood got on a slice of the bread," he adds, smiling up at Tir. "You know I hate to waste food. Don't worry, I'll just wrap this up in a moment."
Tir watched him, his expression now very worried. "A slice of bread or even a sliced thumb worries me not nearly as much as your temperament. Gremio, it is not like you to be so careless, both in word and in deed."
Still smiling, Gremio shook his head at Tir. "I'm fine, Young Master - see, the bleeding has nearly stopped already." He looked through another sack inside his pack, pulling out a length of cloth bandage. "Nothing to worry about - just relax, and I'll go back to making lunch in a moment..."
Not entirely satisfied, Tir picked up the pear he dropped on the ground in his haste to get to Gremio, and attempted to brush the dirt off of it. "I still say... that if you wish to speak to me about anything that is troubling you, you may. I never mind your taking care of me, but you must remember that I have been in positions where I have dealt with many problems and worries."
Gremio nodded easily, having sliced a shorter length of the bandage off, and he set about wrapping the slight wound. As he worked, his hand was placed carefully in his lap so that Tir couldn't see the way it shook. "I know you have, Young Master, and I appreciate it."
Finally getting annoyed at his attempts to get the dirt off the pear, Tir stood up and chucked it rather violently towards the trees to the west of them. Having done that, he stalked off in the opposite direction, arms crossed over his chest.
Gremio finished tying off the bandage, and looked up. "Young Master...?" Tir stopped several yards away, with his back to Gremio, and did not answer. Gremio just gazed at him, helplessly. "I... Have I done something wrong?"
Having quite retreated into himself, Tir shrugged and did not reply as he sat down in the frozen grass, staring up at the sky. For just a moment Gremio turned back to the half-readied food, only to wrap up the bread again before he went to sit down behind Tir. "...Tell me what I can do, Young Master."
Tir looked down at the ground and shook his head. "It's more what you won't let me do."
With a frown, Gremio placed a hand carefully on Tir's shoulder. "Would you mind explaining?"
Again Tir shook his head. "It's nothing I have not said before. I do not wish you to feel or act like you are alone in this, especially not for my sake."
"I know I'm not alone," Gremio assured him, squeezing his shoulder gently. "But there are some things a man simply has to do for himself."
"But if you needed me..." Tir began, looking back at Gremio over his shoulder, "you'd tell me? Honestly?"
"Of course I would. And..." He paused, trying to think of a good way to word it. "I have grown up taking care of my own business, never needing assistance when it came to personal matters. But yet, in a sense I always need you... if I were to have no cause, nothing to protect... I am not sure what I would do."
Tir blinked at him in surprise, not having expected him to say such a thing, even if it was true. "Gremio..." he began, "Gremio... maybe that is part of what I fear. That without you, I have nothing to protect and care for either. Maybe that is my fear in going on forever alone. Anything and anyone I ever did decide to care for would eventually vanish from me."
Gremio bit his lip, wondering if he should say anything about his own thoughts on the subject. "I can... understand that fear very well. But Tir, even without me, you would have a purpose," he reminded his Young Master. "You hold the Soul Eater - unless you pass it to another, you must keep watch over it, keep it from falling into the wrong hands..."
"And what a lonely way to spend a lifetime," said Tir with a solemn nod. "I can see how some true Rune holders got bitter after so long. Mine is not even something like Joshua's Dragon Rune that can be helpful to others."
Gremio raised an eyebrow, anticipating a conversation they'd had before. "I wouldn't be so sure... the Soul Eater is not its true name, after all - your rune is the Rune of Life and Death... Perhaps we simply haven't seen the 'Life' portion of its powers yet."
Tir mused over that statement quietly. "Perhaps you are right... but I will not believe it to be true until I see it."
"It must have been given that name for a reason... but no matter," Gremio said with a sigh. "For the time being, it is enough for you to keep it safe. Much as I intend to do with the Beast Rune, which... as far as I know, has only violent applications."
Tir frowned and sighed. "I am sure we are up to the task..." Very ready to change the subject, he glanced back at their packs. "Would you like to return to lunch?"
Gremio nodded, going back to unwrap the bread again. "I wonder what's keeping Viktor and Flik so long..." An explanation occurred to him as he remembered the previous night - how a shirtless Viktor had staggered over to their door at a late hour, asking with a grin for a glass of water - and he blushed and shook his head.
Tir chuckled softly and came back to sit beside Gremio. "I won't even comment. I'll just laugh and assume that you are more than likely correct."
Slicing another bit of bread, Gremio refused to take his eyes from the food before him. "I would like to think that they're more responsible than that." Having sliced enough bread, he unwrapped a fresh round cheese and began to do the same, slicing it in just such a way that it would fit perfectly on the bread when arranged properly, as he did when finished. "There you are, Young Master..."
Tir happily took the bread and cheese from Gremio, taking a large bite, but being careful to chew and swallow before speaking again. "Perhaps they are just slow then. They were awfully tipsy last night before I went to sleep. I don't recall them drinking that much during either of the wars except perhaps at large celebrations. I wonder why that is..." he pondered.
As he slipped the bread and cheese back into the pack, Gremio turned back to Tir, smiling slightly. "Most likely because, despite all the things Viktor has done to indicate otherwise, they are responsible. During the wars, there was always the possibility that something we hadn't expected might happen. If they were to get thoroughly drunk, and then we had been attacked, they wouldn't have been able to lead their companies, which would have left the armies either with inexperienced leaders or simply less troops to work with."
Tir nodded again, lost in thought as he ate more of his bread and cheese and then dug in the side of his pack for his water. "When I think about it, they really did play a large role in both the wars... I don't know what we would have done without them. It's amazing that while overall numbers are important in fighting a war, it is often few individuals who really turn the tide one way or another."
Prompted by Tir's actions, Gremio sat back, taking his own waterskin from his side. "What's truly amazing," he added, after taking a brief drink himself, "is that often, over even those individuals, there is always someone higher to direct their actions. Perhaps a king or queen..." He smiles at Tir. "Or a boy traitor-turned-general who became the hope of the people."
Tir blushed thoroughly. "Gremio..." He trailed off and sighed, looking up at the sky. "It seems like a long time ago."
"It has been a few years already..." Gremio agreed. He looked up at the sky also, blue and white through what was left of the trees' leaves. "Would you want to return to a life like that, Young Master?"
Tir, having finished his meal, scooted closer to Gremio and rested his head on the other's shoulder. "No. I do miss the people sometimes... the noise and the cooking, the singing and playing... but I do not miss the rest. I do not miss the decision making, the grief...the graves. I say that I do not know if I could ever do it again, but at the same time I have no doubt I would rise to the occassion should it ever unfortunately arrive."
Gremio leaned his head against Tir's also, thinking to himself. "Not so much the life of a wartime general, I should say... but a life suited to a leader. I was just thinking that perhaps, if your rune does not offer much aid to the world currently, you might someday want to make yourself useful in such a way. It might make immortality a bit less... repetitive."
Tir sighed heavily. "As I said... if the need arose, I could not deny myself to the people. After all, the desires of one are insignificant weighed against the lives of the masses. But I am quite content right now to merely wander the world and experience all that I never could as a child, and even as a teen. I spent more than half my life in Gregminster, only to be thrust into leadership. A general who knew little of the world but what he'd read in books..."
Trying to be encouraging, Gremio put an arm around his waist. "I certainly would never suggest that you do anything you don't wish to do, Young Master. I merely thought that someday, you may feel up to the task, and it would be a way to pass the time. I certainly understand not wanting to take a place in life that you feel isn't right for you."
Tir nodded and closed his eyes. "Thank you for understanding..." He sighed again, feeling slightly sleepy, and then wondered aloud. "I'm beginning to worry about Viktor and Flik. Should we backtrack?"
Gremio started to answer, then listened. "I hear footsteps coming this way, actually... and they sound heavy enough to be Viktor's." Glancing back the way they came, he caught a glimpse of Viktor's usual yellow shirt through the brush. "Ah, yes..."
With a smile, Tir turned back to look as he staggered into the small clearing. "It's about time you caught up to us, Viktor. You've nearly missed lunch."
"Uh... yeah... lunch." Viktor grinned, breathing a little more heavily than usual. "Uh, see... Flik and I were kinda... you know, hungover... so we got a little behind, I figured I better come tell you guys... Heh, lunch." He chuckled. "Don't worry about it, I'll tell Flik we can relax for a bit... we'll grab something as we walk later."
Gremio was hardly fooled, but said nothing. "Ah... all right then... I'll have something ready for you two when you catch up, and we'll move on."
With a raised eyebrow, Tir looked from Viktor to Gremio. "Are you sure? It's not good to skip meals, especially when we're walking so much."
For an instant Gremio froze, then he realized Tir was talking about Viktor and Flik. "It's no matter - a bit of cheese and bread can be eaten just as easily while walking as while sitting."
Viktor nodded, and waved as he turned to go back the way he came. "Heh. Thanks... Guess I'll go tell Flik. See you guys in a bit."
Once he'd gone, Gremio turned to his pack again, getting out the bread and cheese to fix something for the two mercenaries, while trying not to blush. Tir shrugged and laughed softly, then nudged Gremio. "Are you going to eat lunch now or wait for them?"
"I'm not very hungry yet..." Gremio murmured. "Perhaps I'll do as I suggested for Viktor and Flik, and have a bite while I walk, later."
Tir nodded thoughtfully and yawned. "I almost wish it was already time to stop for the night. Walking is tiring, especially in the cold."
Gremio frowned down at the bread and cheese in his hands, muttering under his breath. "...I wish we could simply move on without stopping."
Tir winced, and rested his chin in his hands. "I'm sorry, Gremio. I do also wish we were already there. And I also think we ought not let ourselves be separated from Viktor and Flik anymore. We are drawing too close."
"Well..." Gremio concentrated very intently on preparing the food. "I would rather not go look for them at the moment."
At the look on his face, Tir laughed again. "I know... just... from now on."
Gremio nodded vaguely, not sharing his amusement at all. "Yes..." Having finished with the bread and cheese, he stared down at it blankly, not certain what he should say or do.
"Gremio...?" Tir asked, reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder. "Are you all right?"
Gremio nearly jumped at his touch. "Ah... yes... I'm fine." He knew that by this time, he couldn't very well be fooling Tir any better than he'd fooled Viktor before, and so he sighed. "I just..."
Tir left his hand where it was and gazed at him steadily. "You just..."
Folding his hands in his lap, Gremio stared down at them helplessly. "To be perfectly honest, Young Master... the idea of immortality terrifies me."
Tir opened his mouth, closed it again and sat in silence for a long time before answering. "Then let's go home. You don't have to do this."
"Oh no, Young Master," Gremio insisted, looking up at him. "I still intend to do it. After all, if you can be brave enough to endure it, if you can come to terms with it... I'm sure I will become used to the idea also."
Tir stared at him, his expression completely neutral. "Do you think I've come to terms with it?"
With a sad smile, Gremio reached up to touch his cheek. "No - otherwise you wouldn't be so torn up over the idea that I might die and leave you alone someday. But perhaps, if you have the assurance that you won't be alone, it will be easier."
"If I have you with me," Tir began, closing his eyes as they started to water, "perhaps I shall never come to terms with it..."
Gremio hesitated. "...What do you mean, Young Master?"
"I will never have to face losing everything if I never lose you. So perhaps you should not do this, and leave me to come to terms with my fate on my own."
"But...!" Gremio stared at him in disbelief. "But you've lost so much as it is! How could I let you lose any more, if it could be avoided?"
"I would never be happy if you were not, Gremio..." Tir stated, shaking his head sadly. "Even if we were forever together. If you didn't want it, then..."
Gremio hesitated again, and finally shook his head. "It isn't a fear that I would be unhappy..." he began, uncertain of how to put it. "With you at my side, I could be content. And heaven forbid - if there should come a day I needed more, I could seek it."
Tir wrapped his arms around his legs and rested his chin on his knees, seeming to make himself as small as possible. "Then what are you so afraid of?" he asked.
After watching him for a moment, Gremio lowered his head with a sigh. "It's hard to put it into the proper words, so that you might not take it the wrong way... so first, may I suggest that you remember," he said quickly, "I have no regrets, and my life in your household, and later travelling with you, was much more wonderful than I'd ever expected my life could be."
Tir said nothing, did not even nod, but merely stared at Gremio, waiting for him to continue as he fumbled to find the right words. "My life, Young Master, has been about working," he said at last, trying to explain. "Working, and serving. I prefer it that way - I don't like to waste time, whether mine or anyone else's. I don't like to take days off. ...In part, because there will be plenty of rest for me when my life is finished."
Understanding what he was saying, Tir once again shook his head. "Then really, Gremio, we should not do this," he repeated. "Not purely for my sake."
In a moment of firmness, Gremio took Tir's head between his hands as he had when the boy was younger, looking at him seriously but gently. "I've come too far to stop now. And it's not only for your sake... do you remember what I said earlier, about keeping the Soul Eater safe?"
"You want... to protect people from the Beast Rune?" Tir asked, reaching up to place one hand over one of Gremio's.
Gremio nodded. "What horrible things could it do in the hands of one who couldn't control it? And with such a strong will, I don't believe it would accept a stranger unless it knew that it could dominate the bearer..."
"But as we have seen," said Tir with a sigh, "it may accept you because you are not exactly a stranger."
Gremio nodded again, and this time smiled. "And if I could take it, before it finds a less stubborn host... there would be no need to worry."
Tir tried to smile as well. "I get afraid sometimes, too... but I think one of the only reasons I've ever kept going so far and so long is because I'd never wish to pass it on to someone else. I know now that Ted passed it to me not to simply to get rid of it and die in peace...but because he knew it needed to be guarded and he was not up to the task any longer."
"I've never believed that he would have given you such a burden if it could have been avoided," Gremio agreed, "if there was anyone else he trusted... he told you that you were his first friend in three hundred years. And this is hardly a reward..."
Tir nodded and went back to resting his chin on his knees. "I miss him, Gremio."
Gremio bit his lip; Tir always looked younger than his age now, of course, but sometimes he looked younger still. "...I'm sure you do, Young Master... I'm very sorry."
"Nothing to apologize for," Tir said, shaking his head. "We've lost a great many people along the way."
"Yes, but Ted was the first, and your... your dearest friend." Gremio winced at the words. "I..." Uncertain of how he could say more without the potential for hurting him, Gremio moved a little closer to Tir, putting his arms around him.
Tir sighed and relaxed a little into Gremio's arms, letting his head drop to Gremio's shoulder. "Gremio, you don't need to say anything else, it's okay... I understand, all of it. And no matter what lies ahead, we shall get through it together, just as we always have..." He trailed off, listening. "Is that them returning, finally?"
Hearing booted footsteps nearby, Gremio nodded, but didn't move. "I believe it is... Shall we get ready to move on, then...?"
"Can we wait for them to get here..." Tir mumbled into his shoulder. "Just a little longer?"
"Of course..." Eager as he was to get this matter over with as soon as possible, with Tir resting against him like a child, Gremio didn't feel a need to move on right away. Although, he thought to himself, after that talk, he felt much calmer than he had only a short time ago. Perhaps he would indeed do as he had suggested earlier, and have a bite to eat for a change, while they continued on their way.
Though they remained wary, and determined to stick close together from then on, nothing unusual happened that night, or the day after, though they drew ever closer to L'Renouille, the former territory of the Beast Rune. Everything seemed perfectly normal to Viktor - the birds seemed to sense no danger from predators, and their songs rang out here and there as the four companions travelled.
Viktor was keeping a close eye on Gremio as well, now that they were back on the road, and Flik seemed to be feeling better. He wasn't sure what exactly had done it, but Gremio seemed to be just fine now too - or at least, much better than he had been. Unlike the last few days they'd been on the road, he smiled and talked to the rest of them without snapping, and usually took meals when he prepared them for everyone else. Sure, he still seemed a little tense, but under the circumstances, Viktor couldn't blame him at all. It was still a big improvement over how he'd been acting before.
Their path took them past a curving river late in the afternoon, and they paused there for a short time before continuing on until well after dark. They were cutting across uncivilized territory to get to their destination as quickly as possible, and the forest was thick, but judging from the confidence of the squirrels, who tried to steal food from Gremio's pack when he wasn't watching, the place they chose to set up camp seemed safe enough.
Except, of course, from the squirrels; when Viktor later went looking for Gremio, finding that he had wandered away from the camp, he found him peering down at a few fallen grapes. "At least I was able to save the bread from those little miscreants," he sighed, "and there weren't many grapes left anyhow."
Viktor chuckled. "Yeah, we had problems with them all the time around North Window. They're bold little buggers."
"Ah well..." Gremio shrugged, leaving the grapes where they were. "It's not as if we'll go hungry. Even if we don't find another village before we reach our destination, there's always fishing, or hunting... and I'm sure I've seen a few apples here and there, still clinging to the trees. And for the time being, we still have plenty of food. Although there is a lack of dry wood around this area - and it's cooling off quickly tonight."
"Clear sky," Viktor agreed, looking up at the stars that had already appeared. "That's what Flik says... at least it won't snow again. Better keep our water close to the fire so it doesn't freeze."
Gremio nodded. "While I'm out here," he reasoned, "I may as well look for some more wood, so we can build up this fire... I think it's safe, so long as I don't go far."
"Eh, I'll go with you," Viktor offered, falling in step behind him. "Better safe than sorry." Plus, he thought, it would give him a chance to talk to Gremio a little bit about this whole business.
"...You know..." he began, after they'd gone a little ways, and gathered a few cracked branches, "it's good to see you on your feet again. After all that stuff that happened before, I mean."
"Ah... thank you..." Gremio murmured absently. "The rest helped me a great deal, it seems."
"No kidding. But hey, do you think you're up to facing that rune again, once we find it?"
Gremio gave him a curious look. "Of course - it wasn't hard to drive it off before at all. In fact," he declared, "I do believe it's been the subject of too many rumors. Why, for a true rune, I was expecting more."
"Gremio..." Viktor looked back at him, dubious. "I fought the thing myself once. And no offense or anything, but if you could drive it off on your own, while weak and sick, there's no way you fought the same thing I fought."
"Well, I don't know how many other two-headed silver wolves make their home in Highland," Gremio replied casually. "I've never been to Highland before this trip. But you grew up in Jowston, so perhaps you would know better about the local wildlife?"
Viktor was slightly annoyed by the edge of sarcasm in Gremio's reply; that wasn't like Gremio at all, and he suspected he knew where it came from. "Like you said before, it might have been testing you," he stated. "Just feeling you out, or something - but don't get too confident. That thing could almost take out me, Flik, Riou, and a bunch of others all at once, and eat up half the population of Muse - it's not some little puppy who'll roll over for you if you swat him with a rolled up paper."
"I know that!" Gremio exclaimed, confirming Viktor's suspicions as he turned to face him. His eyes were narrowed in frustration. "Please, Viktor, don't remind me - if I am to do this, I need to believe I can do it, or I'll... I'll just succumb to my fear, as I did before. And maybe that was why it appeared," he added, hope dawning in his eyes as a thought inspired him. "Perhaps it wants me to take it... perhaps it knew I was afraid, and challenged me in order to give me confidence in myself! Perhaps it will come to me willingly, if I show myself brave against it."
Viktor just shook his head. "That would be nice," he agreed, "but you don't know. And when it comes to something like a true rune, you don't want to fool yourself into thinking it's no big deal. You studied them, right? So you know what I mean."
Gremio nodded. "I do. But... I'm sure it will be all right, one way or another. You and Tir and Flik are here with me, and we have another true rune, if things become desperate. Two, if that sword of yours tells the truth."
"We had a couple last time we faced it, too," Viktor muttered. "It was still a tough battle..."
"I know." Gremio met his eyes evenly, causing him to hesitate. "I'm not afraid of battle, and I'm not afraid to die." He laughed softly. "After all, I've seen it before, or so I hear, and it wasn't so bad. At the very least, being torn apart by giant claws could only be less painful than being eaten alive by Milich's spores, little by little."
Viktor winced. "Er... yeah..." Granted, he was never much for keeping jokes in good taste himself, but how could Gremio laugh about something like that? Well, whatever helped, Viktor supposed.
"But I don't intend to destroy myself," Gremio continued. "I want to do this - I will try to do it - but if things become serious, there is always the option of retreating to regroup, after all."
Not always, Viktor thought. Years of mercenary work had taught him that, in a way that a guy who had spent most of his life keeping house for a nobleman's family wouldn't know. But most of the time... "Yeah... I suppose you're right." Well, at least he didn't intend to just charge in like an idiot - it seemed he'd really been considering the possibilities, and that made Viktor feel a little bit better about the situation. "And we could always back off entirely, go look for another rune... right?"
Gremio turned away, reaching for another dead branch to add to his pile of firewood. "If we must," was all he said.
That, on the other hand, didn't ease Viktor's mind at all.
"Do you think this is the right thing to do?"
Flik looked up from where he had been poking at the fire, trying to get a few more logs to burn, uncertain of how to respond. Deciding that turning the question around might offer more insight as to why Tir had asked, he probed. "What makes you suddenly ask such a thing?"
"I'm... not sure..." Tir was sitting in the grass with his legs drawn up to his chest, arms wrapped around them, chin resting on his knees. "I was so very certain that we had all the right reasons for wanting to do this, but now... I see already the grief that it's caused, and I'm not so certain."
"Have you talked to Gremio about it?" Flik replied, still poking at the fire with a stick. He was still bothered by the most recent letter he'd received, sent by one of the birds from his village. He kept trying to ignore it, all of it, but between the letters and the dreams, it was slowly creeping from the back of his mind to become a pressing every day worry.
Tir sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. "I've tried to tell him that I don't want to do this anymore, but he won't take no for an answer. I... I care about him very much, Flik, and I... I don't want to see him throw his life away doing this for me."
Standing up and brushing his hands off on his pants, Flik walked around the fire, grumbling softly at the lack of dry wood thanks to the recent snowfall. "I don't think he feels like he's throwing his life away on you, Tir."
Tir shook his head, one hand slipping into his pocket to finger the letter already sealed there. "Maybe not - but if I wasn't around, then he wouldn't be doing this! He'd have the chance to be free, to have a family and a home and... and happiness."
"Don't be ridiculous," Flik murmured with a sigh. "Gremio cares more about you than anyone - listen, I'm going to head off into the woods, see if I can find some more dry wood or figure out where Viktor and Gremio have gotten off to. It's getting dark, and it's not really wise for us to be separated away from the fire."
Tir said nothing in response, only watched Flik walk out of the clearing they'd made camp in, still muttering to himself. Withdrawing the letter from his pocket, he held it in his hands, letting the dim light from the fire cast shadows over the off-white envelope. "It isn't that I don't think Gremio cares... I just... I want more than anything for him to be happy, and as long as he's with me... I'm only going to cause him more grief, a lonely existence of wandering..." Rising to his feet, he left the letter laying on the top of Gremio's pack, turning and choosing a path into the forest that was away from all the others, one that would lead him back in the direction they'd come. I'll just leave, run away, so he doesn't have to do this anymore. Once I'm gone, there's no reason to...
As he walked, Tir hummed an old tune from the war days, trying to keep his spirits up. He thought about Gregminster and Kasumi, Cleo and Pahn and all the others he knew, but no one and nothing could really yank his thoughts away from Gremio. Without a light in the growing darkness, he tripped over the roots of a tree, tumbling forward. He winced as he felt a sharp rock cut into his hand, and the Souleater burned at the shedding of blood. Tir grimaced, unworried - for every drop of blood he'd ever given the rune in hopes of silencing it, it had only fueled that power right back into him, as hungry and frustrated as ever. It didn't really want blood unless it meant a soul to devour along with it, and it couldn't devour Tir's when it figuratively owned him already,
Clutching the wounded hand to his chest, he hurried on, now running instead of walking, as if getting farther away would lessen the pain. He's better off without me... They always say... if you love somebody... I can't... I can't... let him throw his life away... it isn't right... Tears were tumbling down his face now, blurring his vision as he came to the edge of a river, and he bent over, wheezing for air between sobs, his breath frosting in the winter air.
Tir gazed out across the river, wondering for just a moment. It was low this time of year, low enough to get across, but it was also bitterly cold. Somehow the thought of drowning himself and the accursed rune in the river didn't strike him as all that terrible and he waded in, fighting the current as he struggled to the other side. He managed to reach the other shore without slipping too badly, and crawled up onto it, shivering and taking a moment to try and catch his breath.
In the distance he could hear shouts, and it urged him to his feet again. He had stumbled no farther than a few more steps form the river before the combination of grief, cold and exhaustion overcame him. Reaching out blindly for something to break his fall, he watched the world spin around him and go dark.
Gremio and Viktor were not particularly surprised, when they returned to the camp, that neither Flik nor Tir were present; after all, Gremio pointed out as he set down his pile of dead wood, Tir and Flik hadn't known that they were coming back with firewood. And that was just fine with them - the night was quickly growing colder, and they could use as much firewood as they could get.
It was something of a surprise, however, when Flik returned with his arms full of wood, but without Tir. "Weren't we supposed to not split up anymore?" Viktor pointed out.
Flik frowned vaguely as he added his wood to the pile. "I only went a little ways, to find you and some fuel for the fire - and I thought Tir was staying here." Something occurred to him, but he shook his head. "Hmm... he probably just decided to do the same. He likes to be helpful, you know."
Gremio wasn't convinced. "This isn't good at all... it's not safe to be out there by himself, and unarmed," he noted, gesturing towards Tir's staff, which still leaned against a tree.
Viktor frowned thoughtfully; that was strange. "Well, judging from the birds, and all the trouble we had earlier with the squirrels, at least it doesn't seem like anything's prowling out there..."
"Do you think so?" Gremio asked, his voice growing tight with worry. "I stopped hearing the birds a bit ago - even the owls have gone silent."
They quieted for a moment, and it was enough to confirm Gremio's words - the forest was absolutely silent, except for the crackle of the fire and the sound of the breeze. All at once, Gremio went to examine Tir's abandoned equipment, while Viktor and Flik circled the edge of the clearing, looking for tracks.
Having found no sign of anything unusual with Tir's pack or his staff, Gremio moved to stand up, and noticed the envelope that lay on top of his own pack. "Tir's handwriting...!" he murmured in surprise, and Viktor and Flik turned back to look as he hurriedly opened the envelope with shaking fingers.
Dear Gremio,
I know you will not be happy when you find this letter, and that your first impulse will be to follow me. I urge you not to. Please do not follow me.
I haven't very much to say beyond what I have already imparted to you, and you should also know that this is not a decision made lightly. I do not believe I was wrong to dismiss you that night at the inn, and I only took my words back out of weakness...selfishness, and love. Yes, love. Continue to pretend you are oblivious, and I will let it go. I will let you go.
You deserve a better life than this. You may serve me willingly, but an eternity of servitude is no reward for the most kind-hearted man I know. You may believe that your reasoning behind seeking the Beast Rune has changed since we set out, that it is less about myself, and more about the rest of the world, but I know as well as you that this quest would *never* have begun if not for me.
Do not do this. I urge you. Let the demons of the past sleep, and do not play with the fates. That rune will be found by he who was meant to find it, and if you try to change that, I fear it will be the death of you, and our friends as well.
I have lost so much, and perhaps in a more profound way than most, but that does not give me the right to be selfish in return. I would be happy to know that somewhere out in the world you were living your life, hopefully even with your lady friend. She would provide far better a life for you than following my whims ever would. You could have a family and a home, and live out your life in peace until the time comes when you would be granted the eternal rest you spoke of.
You yourself said that my rune wielded the power of both life and death. Please, as my final command, let me give you life, so that I may know that not all I touch is turned to eternal despair.
Go home. Please, go home, and leave this all behind.
I will never forget you.
Fondly,
Tir McDohl
Viktor watched Gremio's face carefully as he read the letter; he noted how Gremio went pale, though with faint spots of color in his cheeks, as his eyes scanned the paper, and froze at the bottom. Instead of saying or doing anything, his eyes rose to read over the letter again.
"...Gremio? Hey, Gremio?" Viktor raised his voice as Gremio continued to stare at the paper in utter shock. "Where'd he go? What's this about...?"
Gremio had already read the letter a third time, and still he remained motionless. "I... he..." he stammered, trying to reply through a tightened throat, his eyes still fixed on the paper. "He... left..."
"Damn! I should have known he was thinking about something like this," Flik swore, pacing away from the fire and back again. "We were talking earlier, but... I had no idea! I'll see if I can pick up his trail..."
As Flik skirted the edge of their campsite again, then paused and headed into the brush, Viktor waited. He scowled as Gremio just read over the letter again. "...Aren't you going to go after him?" he asked, incredulous.
"I..." Gremio continued staring at the letter, stunned, then finally raised his startled eyes to meet Viktor's. "I just... I can't seem... to think straight... I can't..."
"You don't have to think!" Viktor shouted, exasperated. "He left! So go after him, you moron!"
"B-but..." Gremio's eyes suddenly narrowed, almost in anger. "O-of course, you're right. I have to go after him! He's my Young Master!" With that, Gremio took up his axe, a firm expression warring with frantic worry on his face, and took off running into the thick of the woods.
"Hey!" Viktor called after him, realizing that they didn't even know which way Tir had gone yet.
Another shape emerged from the darkness almost where Gremio had vanished; Flik looked over his shoulder, puzzled. "Looks like Gremio figured out which way he went too, huh? I just found clear footprints, and was coming back to tell you."
"So at least he's headed the right direction..." Viktor scratched his head. "Okay, I'm going to follow their trails and make sure Gremio stays on the right path. And this is coming along," he stated as he grabbed his sword from the ground, despite its annoyed protest, "in case we see anything funny. Are you with me?"
Flik bared his own weapon with a nod. "I'll be right behind you."
"That's a change."
Flik rolled his eyes at the smirk Viktor tossed over his shoulder as he took off. "Only you, Bear, could make a dirty joke at a time like this."
