Chapter five – Jealousy and Pizza "Your smiling made me sneeze…"

The arriving students noticed something had happened even before the train had reached the station of Hogsmeade. Nobody knew exactly what had happened, but they knew they probably would regret being away for Christmas.

Draco could hear the squealing voices of some girls as they ran towards their friends, and the jealous whines of the arrivals as they got to hear about the Christmas party.

"I couldn't tell you, Li," one girl told her friend while comforting her. "There wasn't the time to tell anyone. We couldn't even buy new dress robes, or find dates since Dumbledore had arranged it the same night he told us…!" The voices faded away as he walked past the group of girls, and new stories came up as they walked on towards the horseless carriages.

"It was so cool… The great hall had been totally changed…! Oh you should have seen Dumbledore dancing… he handled McGonagall like some rag doll… nobody knew a thing… we were all, like, totally surprised… we had a really cool dj who played the most wicked music… guess who were bartenders? THE WEASLY TWINS!! Yeah, I thought they were banned too… you had booze!?" the blond Slytherin found it more aggravating listening to small bits of what had happened, and stormed off towards the nearest carriage, bumping a group out of his way.

"Hey! What's up with you?" one brunette yelled after him,

"Don't worry about him. He's just being a jerk like always. Maybe he's finally figured he's adopted and is left with nothing…" another said with an obvious sneer in his voice.

"Nah, he's probably just been dumped by the slut of all sluts," a third voice said matter of factly.

 "Hey you guys! What are you standing out here for? There's a coach behind you," a new person asked in a happy voice.

"Nah. We're taking another one. The King of Slytherin is in there. We're just standing here making sure nobody else has to endure his company,"

"Ick! Thanks for the warning. Wonder how he can stand himself?"

"Yeah. I bet his mother's having that scrunched up face every time she looks at him, regretting not taking that abortion…"

"I wish he'd just kill him self…" one said darkly. "Can't anyone just pour some poison into his juice? Or send him flying on a mal functioning broom over the forbidden forest!?"

None of the youngsters noticed the slightly open door. Not that they would have cared too much whether the person inside heard them or not. In their minds he deserved it all...

Nobody saw the stricken face as he closed the door fully to cut of the sounds outside. He had wondered what the rest of the students thought of him, and he'd gotten it.

But Draco would never have guessed their actual thoughts, or the hatefulness of their words. Nor had he ever guessed that they'd actually, in some part of their minds, actually mean it all. They truly wished him dead.

"Go… just go…" he muttered to what ever made the carriage move, and leaned back with closed eyes.

Nobody really knew, did they? Nobody really cared. He could be ambushed on the road to Hogwarts, and nobody would care. He could run into the forest, and hide in some cave for the rest of his life, and nobody would care. Nobody cared…

"Why am I here? Why do I bother…?" the words were muttered to the dark space in front of him, as he felt a tear roll down his cheek. Catching the tiny drop of salty water, Draco couldn't but to stare at the wet spot on his hand. He hadn't consciously cried for over twelve years, so the first drop in a long time felt odd.

The feeling wasn't exactly helped by somebody drying off the wetness on his face with a rose scented hanky.

He grabbed the hand, and hauled the strangers' body against the other end of the compartment, feeling utter shock flow down his spine as he saw whom the soft hand and body belonged to.

"My… aren't you strong Blondie…" a soft voice teased through grinning fanged teeth while being pinned to the leather seat. Draco backed slowly towards his own seat and sat down as in a trance.

"E… Enigma?"

"Yeah! Man, you really banged my head hard there? You know you've got some wicked strength there, don't ya," the dark haired woman continued to smile while she tenderly rubbed the back of her head.

"How did you get in here?" Draco said as he felt his tongue finally gaining its ability to move, and his brain could create coherent thoughts. "You weren't here when I first got in! How the hell did you get here!?"

"Ah, you noticed. Wondered when you would?" she grinned at him in a semi apologetic manner. "Well that doesn't mean I weren't here all the time. You did seem quite upset when you entered. Not that it helped too much listening to the things said outside…"

She sat up straight, and shook her head to clear it from the impact it had suffered.

"Then again, I could have pulled off the same thing I did during Christmas. Ever figured how I could get into the manor without setting the alarms?" Draco shook his head. "Ah. Ever noticed one thing these three times I've appeared and disappeared as I pleased? No I'm not a ghost. I'm as real and substantial as you are…" and as if to prove it, she tossed her hanky towards him to wipe his face free from tears. "See… I'm as real as anything.

"But back to my question; ever seen anything special with the times I've appeared?" the cigarette she'd fished out of her sleeve was again lit by the time it reached her lips. Draco looked at Enigma, and tried to get his brain to function. There was something about her that made you forget to connect the dots in your brain. Something about the way she smiled her fanged smile, and the way her eyes flashed electric blue every now and then. Draco was sure they glowed in the darkness when she was amused over something…

'Wait a second…' Draco looked about in the dark compartment, and saw the deep shadows next to him. His bedroom had been nothing but darkness, with the exception of a streak of moonlight by his French windows. The corner he'd first seen Enigma in had been bathed in darkness to begin with as the fluorescent lights flickered off and on in random paces.

He now looked at the woman straight across him. Her attire was of matte, black fabrics, easy to miss in the shadows. The same had applied for the night in the manor, and the waiting area.

"You travel by shadows…" the words were simple, just as the realisation was when he'd finally understood it. Her reaction was only to nod and smile, eyes blazing and urging him to continue his reasoning. "You dress in black clothes to blend in with the shadows, and since the shadows go everywhere, you can go anywhere you please…" Draco stopped reasoning, not wanting to know whether this was the mysterious girl, or whether she had been witness to some embarrassing moments in the dark. She seemed to read his mind.

"I told you once; yer too young for me, Blondie. So you can be quite safe I haven't seen you in the nude, or jerking off in the dark, or anything like that," here she flashed him a grin which made him blush slightly. "You don't tease those fancies; so smack those nasty little thoughts of yours out of yer head," she appeared to give a shudder.

"But however true your reasoning may be, it still doesn't mean I haven't been here the entire time. As for your question way back there, the answer is quite simple; You're here because there's a higher meaning you've got to solve. Well, that or the same thing everybody's figured so far, which is to basically live. As for why you bother? That's all up to you hon. Maybe you like to see what goes on, what it's all about. Maybe it's to prove to everyone you can do anything you want. As I said: it's all up to you…" she leaned back, and for a moment he only saw her eyes and teeth in the semi darkness. "Seems you have reached your final destination, Blondie. Chat later…" and without giving Draco another say, she was gone. The eyes had faded along with the rest of her, and for the first time, Draco Malfoy felt slightly afraid of someone else than his father, and Voldemort…

As he entered the ancient castle, Draco was yet again assaulted with a mass of students who gossiped about what had happened during the winter break, and yet again he heard the same odd retellings of the event.

Not wanting to hear about all the things he missed out, Draco walked towards the dungeons with Crabbe and Goyle on his tail. To his surprise, they were the first ones to enter the Slytherin common room, and he was also surprised to find a dark, leather bound book on one of the tables in the room.

As he approached the table the younger students reverently stepped back to allow their senior to walk where he wished, and picked the heavy book up casually. He began leafing through it, but regretted the action at once. It was filled with colourful pictures of what could resemble the Great Hall, but it was filled with bright flashing lights, students in odd clothing, and in general happy faces. He even saw a picture of a sleeping Longbottom wearing a dog-collar, surrounded by flirtatious girls who kissed him eagerly while they tried to wake him up. The next picture that caught his eye was the bright print on a ladies tee-shirt reading "fuck you, shit head…" and was shocked as the owner turned around showing a grinning Granger. It was something about the picture that made it impossible for him to tare his eyes away from the smiling and winking face. It was something about the way the light caught her eyes that felt oddly familiar…

Slamming the book closed, Draco took the few things he had been carrying to his room and did the regular protection spells around his bed and belongings. One could never trust a Slytherin. Six and a half year with them had taught him so much.

With a glance on Crabbe and Goyle, he left the room, only to be stopped by Goyle shouting after him.

"Where you going Malfoy?"

Turning around halfway he saw Goyle lying on his bed with a book in front of him. A sight he'd never thought was possible a couple of years ago.

"Think I'll go for a walk. Stretch my legs from the train ride. What are you reading?"

"Something I got from an aunt in America. It's about this dog that is kidnapped and shipped off to Alaska to be a sleigh dog. Kind of good for being a Muggle book…"

Nodding a silent approval of the book he himself had read some days ago, Draco walked out of the dormitory, winter cloak still on his back.

"See you later," he called back, getting a grunt for reply. Some things were bound to stay unchanged…

It still amazed him how much Goyle had changed after he had gotten to know his American aunt. She had been the black sheep of the family, and had just turned up on the doorsteps to the Goyle household one summer and influenced her young nephew in ways nobody would have expected. She had made him think for himself and had given the brute boy books to read. Books of fantasy, of miracles even for the Wizard society, and taken him to the cinema. One period he had been hooked on something called The Rocky Horror Picture Show, after visiting her in the states. Needless to say, everyone was pleased beyond words when he had stopped singing a line from a song called The Time Warp with an extremely poor singing voice. Even Crabbe had threatened to beat his friend up horribly if he didn't stop singing the song.

Draco chuckled a bit at the memory. At that time he'd still been a snotty faced brat. A time he regretted every time he thought of it.

Walking through the common room, he felt his eyes drawn to the book on the table once again. Without knowing why, he walked over to it, opened the page where the picture of Granger was, and copied it. As he looked at the duplicate, he couldn't for the world figure why he'd done it. But before he could think of it he pocketed it, glancing about himself slightly shameful to make sure nobody saw him.

Walking out of the common room, he felt for the pack of cigarettes and found them there, happy he hadn't packed them into his trunk.

He never noticed the eyes watching him from the entrance to the boy's dorm.

It was very chilly outside, and it was close to dark, but still an hour until the feast. Draco walked around, looking for a secluded spot where he could be alone.

Taking out the picture, Draco looked at the smiling face of Granger as she turned and posed for the camera, showing off her outfit. Though dimly lit, he still could see the blush on her cheeks, and the sparkle in her eyes and wondered how much the muggle borne witch had had to drink. He'd heard bits about alcohol while passing through the corridors, so he knew there had been some drinking.

But still, there was something in the way the light played on her eyes that made him think of someone else.

"Thought you were going to stretch your legs, Malfoy," came a voice from behind him. Quickly he hid the picture away.

"I was. Just felt more like sitting outside for a moment," Draco replied putting his mask back on, hoping Goyle hadn't seen the other him. The real him…

"You don't need to hide it from me, you know. I've seen the picture of the Mudblood, and truth to tell, she's not all that bad…" Goyle sat down next to him with a sigh.

"Heh. Yeah. Who'd known she was of the female sex at all," Draco gave a small laugh, and looked at the snow-covered landscape.

"Too true. Hey, have you heard about that arrangement the school had arranged with the ministry?" Goyle turned to his friend and studied the expression of the young Malfoy.

Draco nodded. Of course he'd heard about it. He wanted to be in it, for crying out loud!

"Yes, I've heard about it. I got a letter from Dumbledore the same day I got home. Father went ballistic," he had to laugh at the memory of the way Lucius had reacted that day. But the smile didn't last for long as he remembered his hopes were hanging on his mothers' persuasive skills. Without knowing, his face set in to a worried, thoughtful mould. Goyle saw this, and without thinking said something he'd hidden from his fellow Slytherins.

"You know? Think I'll jump to that offer and move to America. Really gotten to like that country…" he still observed Draco from the corner of his eye, and didn't miss the slight stiffening of the blond boy's shoulders. He didn't miss the slight sagging of posture either.

"You've really gotten along with that aunt of yours," Draco stated plainly. "What if you don't get what you want?" he glanced at the huge bulk next to him, only to see him shrug.

"Then I'll move any way," the words were simple, but told it all. Goyle didn't want to stay behind and be his father's clone, and would take the chance of being cast out of his family for making his choice of life.

Draco was about to say something, but was cut off by the gong calling the students to the feast.

"Come on," Goyle had stood up and offered Draco help to stand up. "Let's get something to eat,"

The days went by, turning into weeks and eventually months. Draco Malfoy saw the other students get letters telling them where they were to live for the next year, and he saw their happy faces as they got to live together with their friends. The sheer happiness of those others was enough to make him sneer even more at the rest of the student body, and the comments were even nastier than before. Many thought it only was a last minute panic of him loosing his favourite victims, others just thought it to be normal of the Slytherin prince. Only a few people saw things differently. One of them were Professor Dumbledore who, as it had been confirmed in the last year, knew everything, and felt sorry for the boy.

The other one was Goyle who had seen a tiny sliver of what he was certain was the real Draco Malfoy, and had figured the reason of that sudden moodiness simply by placing the pieces in the puzzle. And though Professor Snape hadn't been known for caring for children, other than favouring his house, he still was the head of Slytherin house and knew through his own means. The last pairs were the Golden Trio who knew.

They had seen the sudden change from the normal taunting which usually was mainly directed towards them, to a rather cruel, and slightly jealous-ish type of bullying of those who had gotten their letters for the summers arrangement.

They were all concerned over the sudden change, and six pairs of eyes watched over the boy carefully.

Draco felt himself watched, but then again it wasn't unusual. He was always watched where ever he went. He was the Malfoy heir for flame's sake! So of course he was watched by nearly everyone. Some of them admired him. Others feared him, but they generally just plainly hated his guts.

However, that was old news. What was new wasn't the feelings of hate, admiration or fear he felt from the stares. It was the feelings of worry and concern that was mixing up with the rest.

Had he let the mask fall for a moment too long? Had he showed himself to the others? Were they on to him?

Without knowing it, he intensified his hateful behaviour and thus made those watching him see more of his fears of not getting the one thing he truly wished for. Without knowing it, Draco showed himself to those with watchful eyes.

Two months passed, and nothing happened. Everyone at Hogwarts got used to the extreme bullying the blond Slytherin practiced. Everyone but six people who were close to him in one-way or the other…

But one day he saw the family's eagle owl swoop in along with the other mail owls. He couldn't help feeling a slight flutter of hope, at the sight of the great bird of pray, but pushed it away, thinking 'Lucius would never allow it'.

As the bird spotted him it swooped down to him and landed in front of his youngest master, long enough for the boy to get the letter attached to his leg, and flew off.

Draco stared at the letter, seeing it was his mothers' feminine handwriting, and pocketed it safely inside his robes.

"Who was that from, Draky?" came the made up voice of Pansy Parkinson.

"For the hundredth time, my name is Draco." He growled at the girl "As in Dragon in Latin…" he added in the same voice one uses to explain something to a five year old.

"And as for your question; the letter is from my mother," he glanced over at her with a mild distaste clearly written over his face "… not that you have anything to do with it."

With that he stood up, and left the Great Hall.

Well inside his room, he took out the letter out of his inner pocket, and with trembling fingers broke the silver seal.

The letter read:

Dearest son.

I'm sorry for not writing to you earlier, but your father and I have been quarrelling a great deal since you left. There is nothing else to say than, I'm glad you weren't here. It was awful.

Exactly what happened is not anything I'd wish to retell, but I can tell you what the outcome was: You have our (your father says "reluctantly" on his behalf) approval on living the upcoming year in your own flat, in muggle London.

The more official permission has already been sent to professor Dumbledore.

Until summer

Your mother,

Narcissa Malfoy

Draco sat on his bed, with the letter in his hand, and a shocked smile creeping up on his face.

'I can go…' he thought. 'I really can go. The old devil finally gave in…'

Drawing a couple of steadying breaths, Draco managed to compose himself and put the old mask on. It had a different feel now that he knew he would be able to put everything behind. No more arrogant sneers, or snide remarks. No more of the constant back slicked hair that felt like a helmet. He was surprised no one had gone calling him "helmet head" long ago.

He hid the letter in a safe place, set the wards around his belongings and went out to class.

'Soon I can get rid of them…' he thought with relish 'Every one of them…' the few first years who had been lingering in the Slytherin common room backed away when they saw the half manic glow in the blond boys eyes, and the smug, almost evil, smile that slowly crept in the corner of his mouth…

Once again, six pairs of eyes saw the boy change back to the one they had known for so long. And slowly they seized to observe him in the same concerned manner as they had done for the past two months.

Once again things were like they should at the Hogwarts halls, and everyone exhaled.

Graduation passed by, and everyone was filled with a mix of emotions over taking their step into a brave new world. Draco was glad he could get out of Hogwarts to finally be himself, but he was a bit sad over not finding his newest obsession. The secret girl of whom he had dreams ever so often. He relived that first night they had met, and he longed to taste her sweet, yet smoky breath once again. He'd even been to the old room where they had seen each other a couple of times before, but his searching had been all in vain, and now it was too late.

He had been speaking with professor Dumbledore about the living arrangements, and got to know there was a single flat, and a position in a book café nearby in London. He had been keen on taking that chance, and he didn't notice his eagerness spoke more to the old man than any words could ever have done. He had known about the deal, and had gotten somewhat relieved when he had gotten Narcissas letter. He didn't want the boy to become a bitter being as so many pure bloods became when their dreams of their futures got crushed. Sure there were some who had accepted their fates, and there were those, like Draco, who gave up everything called wealth and family fortune to pursue a dream they wanted to make true. Unfortunately there weren't too many of that last category. And too few dared to take that open step Draco had taken.

"So is there anything else I should know about the flat and the new neighbours, professor Dumbledore?" Draco asked before exiting the round office for the last time.

"No. You already know you can perform magic in the bathroom as you please and nobody will come to check you out. And that you'll have to work to earn your living. The only thing you might get any assistance with is the first months rent, and of course some food and furniture just to get you started…" Draco nodded in confirmation over the information. He somehow had a feeling he was the only one who had gotten the advantage of being briefed, as he had been the last couple of weeks. If it was due to him never having Muggle Studies in class to get to know about the basic social rules in the muggle society, or if it was to give him smoothest possible start in a brand new, and rather terrifying new life, was uncertain. Still, he was grateful for the help.

That night he had written an owl to his mother to tell her about the progress, and to give her the address and keys. He wanted to move in as soon as possible, even if it meant before school was officially over, but this was something he truly wished to do.

He was walking down the corridor towards professor Snapes office to thank him for everything. He had just sent off the letter to his mother and went to welcome his old head of house welcome for a visit whenever he wanted. He had just turned a corner when he felt a presence amongst the shadows.

"Enigma?" he called out instinctively. But instead of raven hair, glowing blue eyes, pale skin and smiling naturally dark lips, a collision of blond, pale blue, bronzed powder and pale pink lip-gloss was what came towards him. "Oh, it's you…" he said plainly, continuing on his way only to be held back by his arm.

"Yeah it's me Drakey, who were you expecting?" she pouted not giving any indication of letting him go.

"I wasn't expecting any one. I just thought it to be someone who comes and goes as she pleases…" he said absentmindedly, not thinking about his blunder.

"She? This "Enigma" character is a SHE!? And she comes and goes as she pleases!?" Pansy shrieked loud enough to make a late bat to fall from its perch in the shadows.

"Josef Christ junior! Pansy!! What's the matter with you!? Yes Enigma is a She," not the she I'm looking for though, he thought, "and she's been helping me out a couple of times. Why do you blow a fuse over…? Oh…" He finally understood why the blond had reacted that way. "That's sick, Pansy. She's like a sister…" was all he said darkly in disgust before yanking his arm away and striding off to professor Snapes office, ignoring the vain pleas of apology.

'Now why did I tell her that?' Draco thought while turning a corner, even more puzzled than Parkinson was. shaking his head he raised his hand to knock on the office door.

There wasn't an answer right away, so he knocked a couple of times more.

"Come in" came the smooth voice of the potions master, clearly annoyed over being disturbed in the middle of something.

Draco opened the door, just in time to see the door to the bathroom close, and the dark potions master was straightening his jacket.

"Yes Mr. Malfoy. What do you want?" he said hastily, and Draco thought the pale Slytherin head of house looked un normally flushed. And weren't his lips a bit redder? As if he had been in the middle of an intense snogging session?

"Err…" was all he could say to begin with, eyes darting from professor Snape, towards the door to the ante chamber, and back again.

"I came down here to thank you for your help over the years, and to tell you you're welcome to come for a visit at the new flat…" he trailed off again, eyes darting back and forth.

"Thank you mr. Malfoy. Would that be all?" Snape asked, still a bit vexed over the interruption.

"Err… what's happened to you by the way?" The question was launched without thinking, and Draco immediately regretted opening his mouth at the moment he met the professors glare.

"Nothing has happened to me, mr. Malfoy, so please do mind your own business," he replied menacingly. "If that would have been all…" it wasn't a question. It was an order to get the hell out of there.

"That would be all, sir," Draco said while backing towards the door, feeling a bit disappointed over the lack of the normal courteous warmth the two used to have.

As he was about to close the door, he heard the professor clearing his throat and saying with a softer voice

"Thank you for the offer mr. Malfoy. Good luck with your new life…"

Looking back towards the professor for the last time that year of school, he saw a genuine smile gracing the face of the otherwise stern professor.

"Thank you Sir. Have a good night." He closed the door in his wake, and got to his own rooms to sleep.

'Only four more days until our last day' was his last thought before falling asleep.

A week later, inside an old, but well kept building, behind the door of the third floor wearing a bronze plaque bordered by a Celtic snake and dragon, and bearing the letters "D.B" in elusive gothic lettering, a blonde boy was slipping a newly fried pizza out of the oven.

"Are you sure about not needing help, darling?" asked the older woman worried. "I mean, I could have a house elf to help you out the first couple of days…" she trailed off at the glare she got over his shoulder.

"Mother. The reason I wanted to go on with this arrangement was to learn to live on my own, without anyone waiting up on me," he threw the slightly charred disk on to a cutting board, and grabbed a knife. "So, how many, and how big slices do you want?" he said with a grin, knife ready in hand for cutting.

Narcissa thought he looked like an insane psychopath thinking there was nothing wrong in the world to walk up to complete strangers, and stabbing them while having a silly grin plastered to his face.

"Eh… Why don't you just cut it in eight, and we'll see who eats most…" she said smiling uncertainly. Shrugging, Draco turned to the pizza and cut eight very uneven peaces and placed the tray on the living room table.

"Eat up!" he grinned pouring himself a big glass of coke…

"Are you sure about living here?" his mother asked while biting gingerly into the slice, trying not to stain her clothes with the tomato sauce, or dribbly cheese. Grinning at the sight of her sitting in a muggle summer suit on the dark brown couch and eating pizza along with some diet soda, he finally felt like he was alive. Below he could head a van pulling up outside and a tumult of voices as the rest of the graduating students living on the same floor came to move in.

"Yeah. I'm sure mother." He replied smiling. He was really looking forward to start his new life as an adult.

Stuffing his face proudly with his first home cooked meal, he looked around the flat and admired the modest flat consisting of two rooms and a magical bathroom. He was really glad his mother was the one to decorate the place before he got there, otherwise it would not have been a suitable place to live in at all. Now it was really nice, and it felt more like home than what his old home did.

The living room was long and had a kitchenette through which you had to walk to get to the rest of the flat, and back out to the hallway and the bathroom. The walls were of a lovely cream colour, and the wooden floor had a warm deep brown glow to it. The furniture were all in dark, antique looking styles, complimenting the darkness of the floor, and the fabrics were in bright warm shades complimenting the walls. The other colours, which dominated the room in a more subtle way, were the greens of flowers and various potted plants and the silver of picture frames, flower pots, bowls, candle holders and other whatnots his mother had scattered here and there. The warm summer sun shone through the big windows reaching all the way to the ceiling, and the French doors leading to the minute balcony were open. All in all warm and inviting, making people wish to stay.

The bedroom had its entrance next to the kitchenette, and was about half the size of the living room. It was painted in a pale greyish form of ice blue, making the room cool and relaxing. The dark wooden floor was covered in a deep green carpet with a silver dragon motif around the edge, a house-warming gift from his mother.

His bedspread and the thick light blocking curtains were in a lush green which made the onlooker think of a summer forest. That, accompanied with silver satin sheets, and light silvery curtains made the room the perfect Slytherin room.

"I think this will be perfect mother…" Draco said after finally swallowing the food

AN:

This new version of chapter five was made some time ago. Can't fully remember when, but for some odd reason, it was never posted as it should have. It is, in my mind far better than the previous one as it explained, and brought other aspects to the story. Hope you enjoyed it.

Tiani