Chapter.4

"I think these school trips are a little pre junior high." Brooke Davis paused on the crowded path and brushed at a mauve tinted shell. "Ooh! These little red things bite!"

"Put something else on," Lucas advised. He was walking just behind the so-called "cheerleaders group"; not from preference, but out of necessity. Coach Whitey was along with the few teachers supervising the hike, and he'd wisely separated Tree Hill's athletes from their star player.

"I didn't bring anything else." Brooke turned, flipping her hair back. She smiled coyly. "Got anything extra I could wear?"

Lucas shook his head, quickly peeling out of his hooded sweatshirt. "Here."

Brooke took the shirt from him and smiled. "You know, I like the whole teeshirt thing on you. It looks good."

"They're cheap and they wear well." Lucas nodded at her and fell back a little, pretending not to notice her parting glance.

"So. You still trying to be every girl's hero?"

Peyton, eyes mocking. She didn't seem to mind the strands of windblown hair or muddy trail.

Lucas tried not to let his admiration show. Sometimes, when he looked at Peyton and saw that lost, little girl look, he imagined what it would be like, just taking her in his arms and holding her close. And then he'd probably get slapped in the face.

"I don't like it when you do that, you know." Peyton scuffed the toe of her shoe on a fallen branch as they fell into step together.

"Do what?"

She rolled her eyes."That stupid look. That-thing you do when you act like I'm going to-to break or something."

Lucas merely smiled at her embarrassment. She squinted up at him, but his face was neither amused nor angry.

"You think I'm dumb, don't you?"

"Do you really want to know what I think?"

She tossed her head, moving away."Probably wouldn't interest me, anyways."

Lucas lowered his voice, but a stray tail of wind caught the words and she couldn't help but hear,"they are not you."[]

"Hey, girl." Brooke caught Peyton's hand and pulled her into the group. "What's with Scott?"

"Which one? They're both crazy." Peyton glanced back a moment later, at Lucas who walked along, hands in pockets, eyes on something far ahead. At Nathan, in the lead, laughing and goofing around with "the boys."

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing. And everything."

"Well, it can't be all bad. Someone has been following us the entire day."

Peyton arched an eyebrow. "You mean Luke, who was told to walk behind the cheerleaders yay-yay group because Coach Whitie didn't wan't open warfare?"

"Oh, I don't know. A little sweat, a little blood on these boys..."

Peyton stifled a laugh as Lucas cast a surprised glance in Brooke's general direction, one that definitely questioned her sanity.

"What?" Brooke whispered out of the side of her mouth, not turning her head. "Is he looking at me?"

Peyton managed to retain a grave expression. "Ah, yes. He was."

The brunette cheerleader squealed. "I knew it!"[]

Into the afternoon sun Tree Hill's students walked, a long line of straggling, talking, brightly clothed individuals. The teachers wanted to make make camp by nightfall.

Luke had seriously considered dropping the trip, one of the reasons being that Haley was coming with her band of devoted friends: a group he'd teasingly dubbed the "Court of the Tutor Queen."

Not to mention they were walking the lead, and Nathan and co. were close behind.

They passed a good sized stream, wove in and out of the trees, fields of waving grasses, but mostly climbed uphill.

"Alright. Let's set up camp."

The call scattered individuals, for most of them had been previously assigned to various tasks. Lucas left to gather fire wood with most of the guys.

He set out by himself, stopping to chatter at a squirrel that danced in the branches just overhead. He began to get farther and farther away, until he couldn't see the camp anymore. Whitie didn't wan't any trouble, and Lucas knew just staying out of it wasn't going to prevent that. He'd have to avoid trouble.

It seemed eternally peaceful up here. There was a half dried pool where deer and other animals had left a criss cross of tracks. Lucas knelt down and traced one print with his thumb. The deer that had made this must be close by, because it had just started to fill up with water. He wandered,uncovering a few late flowers that he gently tugged up by their roots. They were pink. Lucas held them in his hand, noticed how fragile they were. He tucked them in his pocket to give to Haley.

When he drug several good sized limbs into camp, Lucas spotted Haley, bent over the fire, poking at miniature mountains of foil wrapped potatoes.

"Hey." She glanced up. "Hi, Luke."

"Haley."

"Yes?"

"You get any closer, you're going to singe those wispy things."

"Excuse me? Wispy things?"

Haley threatened him with her fork.

"Whoa, I meant hair. Hair!"

Haley delivered an imaginary thrust, and Lucas coughed, hands to his chest.

"You better bring back plenty of firewood."

"Hales-"

"What?"

He shrugged, extended the flowers.

Haley stepped back, sarcasm dying. "Thanks, Luke."

He smiled. "Better get some more wood."

"Yes, you'd better."

Luke jogged into the trees, heard a shrill laugh, and Haley's voice floated back to him.

"Hurry, more fire for my cauldron!"[]

Daylight faded to darkness quickly. Tents were scattered around the clearing, the teachers evenly dispersed throughout them.

Haley thought this was the best part of it all. Two bonfires were burnt down to softly glowing night lights, and Lucas sat beside her, just listening to the muted conversations going on around them. Peyton caught Lucas's eye, her head nestled on Nathan's shoulder, and she stared until he looked away.

"What are you thinking about?"

Luke started at the sound of her voice. "How it's so peaceful and quiet up here."

"I know. It's like a church, only outdoors."

Luke nodded, staring up at the sky. "Someone said that the forest is a cathedral."

Peyton followed his gaze. "That's a funny thing to say."

Haley shifted, her arms around her knees. "I don't think so. I think I understand."

Luke smiled at her. She wrinkled her nose back, and he grabbed a pigtail.

"Remember when I used to do this?"

"Come on, Peyton." Nathan stood up, brushing at his jeans.

"I want to stay by the fire."

"Lets take a walk."

The two moved off, beyond the firelight. One of the teachers called out, "Don't go too far!"

Haley shook her head. "I think I'll drag my bedroll out here. The thought of sleeping in a tent with ten other girls..."

One of the guys laughed.[]

Lucas lie in his tent, unable to sleep. He heard Nathan come in, hoped his sleeping bag wasn't the empty one next to his...

"Hey."

Luke rolled over, peered into the dark. Nathan was bent over him. "Outside."

No one else stirred. Luke, in silent misgiving, pulled on his shoes and ducked underneath the entrance.

"What?"

Nathan, fully dressed, stuck his hands in his jacket pockets and shrugged. "Just want to talk."

Lucas wrapped his own arms around himself and frowned. "Why?"

"I think we have some things we need to say to each other. Off the record."

"Anything I say can be on the record."

"Hey. Suit yourself." He started down the trail, toward the stream. Lucas hesitated, then grabbed his baggy camp shirt from the bag next to his bed.

Nathan was already out of sight. Lucas jogged after him, suspicious.

"Over here."

His half brother was sitting on a moss covered log, hands folded beneath his chin.

Lucas pulled his shirt on and slowly sat beside him.

"You know..." Nathan stared at his hands. Lucas was sitting in the only patch of moonlight; it was hard to read the other's expression.

"I always hoped, when we were just kids, that you would be my friend. I didn't have anyone, either. I was just a lonely little kid, and then someone said , 'look, there's your big brother.' " Nathan cleared his throat. "I never would have thought we would have ended up like this."

"Enemies, " Lucas interjected, quietly.

"My dad hates you."

"You hate me, " Lucas said, simply.

Nathan shook his head. "It'll never work. You know it'll never work."

"What?"

"You, being on the team. Being one of us. You're not. Our style, everything-you're from one side of town, I'm from another."

Lucas watched him, eyes uncertain.

"Peyton will never be with you. And I see the way you look at her. I see the way that brown eyed chick looks at you. It's a crazy world."

Lucas's tone was gentle. "It doesn't have to be."

Nathan laughed, a bitter, short exclamation. "Look, my dad already has my future all mapped out. Things just don't happen because you want them to."

"Why not?"

"Because that just isn't life."

Lucas's voice came out ragged. "Why not? Isn't life already enough of a hell hole, it doesn't mean we have to get stuck in a rut and-and just sit there and take it! Look, I'm not going to sit here and take it. Not only for myself, but for my mom." He looked away. "The past is the past. They're not our mistakes, we shouldn't shoulder the blame."

Nathan's answer sounded hopeless. "But don't we? Don't we shoulder all that guilt every day of our lives?"

"I do. I do." Lucas swiped a rough hand across his eyes. "But you're still my brother."

Nathan stood up abruptly, fists clenched. "I'm sorry. I don't think I can deal with that."

He strode down the path, leaving Lucas to stare after his retreating form, feeling that he'd just lost the last chance he'd ever have to patch the shattered ties between them.

Lucas was angry. Angry at himself, for failing. Angry with Nathan, for giving up so easily. Angry....

His anger melted to sadness, and he curled against the tree, head on his knees, waiting for the turbulent emotion to pass. All thoughts of the school trip vanished, and he was filled with a sick, longing ache to have his mom smile and tell him what a foolish boy he was being.[]

Half an hour later he wandered into the clearing, eyes bright and jaw set. Lucas stretched out on one side of the dying fire, behind one of the logs they'd used as a bench, and cushioned his head in his arms.

The breeze blew through the trees, damp, cold, lifting his shirt, tousling his hair.

Lucas rolled onto one side, hesitated. A shadowy figure with light hair framing it's face...

Peyton, cheeks streaked with wind dried tears, crossed the deserted clearing, hugging herself, eyes raised to the gently glowing stars.

Lucas caught his breath as the moonlight splashed over her features; open, unmasked, honest. He bit his lip and remained silent as she sank to the fireside and tilted her head up wards, looking, listening.

In the dark he watched her, looking at his stars, listening to his own voices.[]

Fade out: gently spinning, a leaf in the moon light, above the two lying side by side, almost together, too proud to show the world what was in their hearts...and afraid, if they did, it would kill them...................