Geez, I took forever in updating. Whatsit been? 6 months? God, I hate my
math teacher. She keeps failing me. Anyway, here goes the fourth little
piece of god-forsaken trash I am attempting to pass as a fanfic.
Chapter four It's raining... THINGS... hallelujah
When Sora woke up the next day, he found that he had sleepwalked all the way up the boardwalk and had gotten his head stuck in a barrel. After a while, he got free and went off in search of Kairi. She wasn't anywhere to be seen. He beat up a few palm trees to pass the time, and quickly found another pastime when one very peculiar looking tree hit back.
That was when he realized that he hadn't looked in the cove yet. He ran over to the door and tried to open it for five whole minutes before he realized that the door opens in. He finally got the thing open and stepped through.
Expectantly he shouted, "Hey Kairi, what arglmphg". Riku had sat on his head around the letter G. It wasn't until later that Sora realized that Riku had been trying to show him his new G-string. For some reason, Riku's weird underwear always reminded Kairi of home.
Sora's thoughts were cut off when Riku shouted into his ear. "Racie time! Come princess glorgon shorts! We must boing to flash flash tree!" For those of you not fluent in Riku, he just said "Hey, Sora, wanna race? KAIRI! Start us off willya?"
Seeing no other way to get Riku off his face, Sora agreed. The race was always the same. To the odd-looking tree and back. Riku started in front. He was a faster runner, so Sora always won in the same way. He threw a shiny rock at Riku and the ballon-pantsed idiot just stared at it while the other buffoon won the race. Then he got his prize.
It was not exactly the small island to rule that he had expected.
"...And then you can do my laundry, don't forget to sing my socks a lullaby beforehand. They usually like the 793 verse 'ballad of edited for profanity' unless it's a Monday, which it is, in which case they like a three-hour performance of 'the pizza jig'. Remember to wear clown shoes. After that you can wrap up the day by getting all that trivial stuff for our voyage, like food and water." Kairi finished her list of things for Sora to do by attempting to do a Riku impression and fly away. As could be expected, this came to an abrupt, sandy ending. It took Sora the rest of the day to get to the laundry. That took a while (twenty-four and two thirds hours) because Kairi had a lot of socks that were so dirty that they were showing signs of intelligent life.
When he finished getting the food, it was Tuesday night. That's approximately when it started raining oozy purple blobs. 'Damn," thought Sora. "This wasn't in the forecast" The forecast had in fact been for light yellow blobs. It wasn't until they took actual physical shape that Sora got worried. They turned out to look like the odd insect things from the even odder dream, with one extremely evident difference.
"Oh G-d no, please no!" shouted Sora desperately. "Not tourists! Anything but the ultimate evil on any island world!" He ran as fast as he could to Riku's island, which didn't actually make a lot of sense because Riku was on the list of 'least advisory people' as number 3, under George W. and your English teacher. What he found was Riku doing the backstroke in a growing pool of darkness. "Come prince Froogaloop! Join the thingy that's not light, but not fuzzy bunnies either!" Sora didn't try too hard to catch him. The silver haired boy was replaced by Kairi, who was inexplicably dressed in a tutu. She tried to speak to Sora while running at him, and what came out of her mouth was this: "SorayougoodfornothingslackergetmeoutofthisthingandsavemeoriwillTELLYOURMOM- MY!". She was about to fall into Sora's arms, causing major plot development and a boost of my ratings, but I'm stingy like that. So, she disappeared entirely. This time, a robed figure appeared in her place. It said, in a very high pitched voice something that will be totally not understandable until later chapters. "Well, Sora. You seem to be doing really well, considering you don't even know what the main plotline is yet. Anyway, I am the weird thing that likes blowing planets up as a hobby. No, I am not Michael Jackson. Anyway, you will need this key thing so you can whip the crap out of me later. Tata now!"
He left Sora with a large key in his hand, feeling like he was ready for anything. He didn't know how wrong he was.
Chapter four It's raining... THINGS... hallelujah
When Sora woke up the next day, he found that he had sleepwalked all the way up the boardwalk and had gotten his head stuck in a barrel. After a while, he got free and went off in search of Kairi. She wasn't anywhere to be seen. He beat up a few palm trees to pass the time, and quickly found another pastime when one very peculiar looking tree hit back.
That was when he realized that he hadn't looked in the cove yet. He ran over to the door and tried to open it for five whole minutes before he realized that the door opens in. He finally got the thing open and stepped through.
Expectantly he shouted, "Hey Kairi, what arglmphg". Riku had sat on his head around the letter G. It wasn't until later that Sora realized that Riku had been trying to show him his new G-string. For some reason, Riku's weird underwear always reminded Kairi of home.
Sora's thoughts were cut off when Riku shouted into his ear. "Racie time! Come princess glorgon shorts! We must boing to flash flash tree!" For those of you not fluent in Riku, he just said "Hey, Sora, wanna race? KAIRI! Start us off willya?"
Seeing no other way to get Riku off his face, Sora agreed. The race was always the same. To the odd-looking tree and back. Riku started in front. He was a faster runner, so Sora always won in the same way. He threw a shiny rock at Riku and the ballon-pantsed idiot just stared at it while the other buffoon won the race. Then he got his prize.
It was not exactly the small island to rule that he had expected.
"...And then you can do my laundry, don't forget to sing my socks a lullaby beforehand. They usually like the 793 verse 'ballad of edited for profanity' unless it's a Monday, which it is, in which case they like a three-hour performance of 'the pizza jig'. Remember to wear clown shoes. After that you can wrap up the day by getting all that trivial stuff for our voyage, like food and water." Kairi finished her list of things for Sora to do by attempting to do a Riku impression and fly away. As could be expected, this came to an abrupt, sandy ending. It took Sora the rest of the day to get to the laundry. That took a while (twenty-four and two thirds hours) because Kairi had a lot of socks that were so dirty that they were showing signs of intelligent life.
When he finished getting the food, it was Tuesday night. That's approximately when it started raining oozy purple blobs. 'Damn," thought Sora. "This wasn't in the forecast" The forecast had in fact been for light yellow blobs. It wasn't until they took actual physical shape that Sora got worried. They turned out to look like the odd insect things from the even odder dream, with one extremely evident difference.
"Oh G-d no, please no!" shouted Sora desperately. "Not tourists! Anything but the ultimate evil on any island world!" He ran as fast as he could to Riku's island, which didn't actually make a lot of sense because Riku was on the list of 'least advisory people' as number 3, under George W. and your English teacher. What he found was Riku doing the backstroke in a growing pool of darkness. "Come prince Froogaloop! Join the thingy that's not light, but not fuzzy bunnies either!" Sora didn't try too hard to catch him. The silver haired boy was replaced by Kairi, who was inexplicably dressed in a tutu. She tried to speak to Sora while running at him, and what came out of her mouth was this: "SorayougoodfornothingslackergetmeoutofthisthingandsavemeoriwillTELLYOURMOM- MY!". She was about to fall into Sora's arms, causing major plot development and a boost of my ratings, but I'm stingy like that. So, she disappeared entirely. This time, a robed figure appeared in her place. It said, in a very high pitched voice something that will be totally not understandable until later chapters. "Well, Sora. You seem to be doing really well, considering you don't even know what the main plotline is yet. Anyway, I am the weird thing that likes blowing planets up as a hobby. No, I am not Michael Jackson. Anyway, you will need this key thing so you can whip the crap out of me later. Tata now!"
He left Sora with a large key in his hand, feeling like he was ready for anything. He didn't know how wrong he was.
