Chapter 2: The Gay Marriage

11:00 AM in the morning... exhausted, tired. Another day with the strangely infected Souma's ... another day of misery. It was Hotori's idea that they should let Momiji, Kisa, Hiro, and Haru stay over. Tohru glanced around the room and saw Shigure reading the morning papers.

Shigure: Ohayo Gozaimasu Tohru! You sure slept in.

Tohru: How can you possibly be so...so... not tired!

Shigure: *Cough cough* Sleeping pills *Cough cough* ... How about you? Did you have a good sleep?

Tohru: YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T HEAR THEM!?!?!

Shigure: Here what?

Tohru: Momiji was opening and slamming the door for the whole night!!! And then you can kinda hear Yuki and Kyou in the other room....... Doing stuff...........

Shigure: O_O D-Doing stuff?

Tohru: *nod nod* And Haru was talking to himself! There was also Hiro who was painting his wall magenta pink! *Panting like crazy*

Shigure: What!?! I wanted it baby pink not magenta pink!!!!

Tohru: -_o;;

Shigure: Er...... you're probably hungry...... since no one had breakfast yet let's start an early lunch. Do you mind calling everyone down?

Tohru: No thank-you! *slips away*

Shigure: Ok then... HEY, PEOPLE!!! IT'S TIME FOR... *everyone stampedes downstairs and tramples on Shigure* ... Ah aw aw awawawawawawaeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! .... My back! WATCH THE KIMONO!!! I JUST WASHED IT!!

~ * 20 Minutes later when lunch was ready * ~

Everyone: *droooooooooooooooool*

Shigure: Time to eat! Say, has anyone seen Kisa lately?

Kisa: I'm right here!

Kisa was all dressed in black from head to toe. Acting all cool and gothic by chewing and blowing her bubble gum.

Everyone: O_o .... *No comment*

Hiro: OMG! I JUST LUV THAT BLACK OUTFIT OF YOURS, TOTALLY!!! *o* MIND IF I TRY IT ON FOR SIZE L8TER GURLFRIEND??

Kisa: Hands off sheep boy!

Tohru: Erm.......it's nice that you can finally--

Kisa: Cut the crap and let me eat without choking!

Tohru: *gasp* O_O k...................

Kisa: Don't look so surprised.

Tohru: .........

Haru: *Chokes* OK, WHO PUT YARN IN MY NOODLES!?!?!?!

Momiji: *Grin* Heheh.

Haru: YOU LITTLE... *Puts his hands around Momiji's neck and tries to strangle him.*

Everyone: -_-;;

Hiro: I'm gonna like hit the rug to the mall with my girlfriends so like don't expect me home for dinner, totally! Sayonara minna-san! * Walks out the door and into a limousine with his "friends"*

Everyone: ..............

Shigure: You know, he makes us all look like we're hobos............ *stares at the limousine as it drives off*

~ * 15 Minutes Later * ~

Yuki: Ahem! Excuse me everyone! Me and Kyou would like to make an important announcement. Would you like to do the honors? *Blink blink*

Kyou: Certainly, my love! *Shine* AHEM... Yuki and me are planning to get married in two days!!! ^_^ isn't that exciting?

Everyone: ......................................... AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!

Haru: *Wipes the tears off his eyes* that's funny guys, good one!

Kyou & Yuki: ...............

Haru: You mean you were serious.

Yuki: No duh.

Tohru: First you were mortal enemies now you're lovers! I'm so proud of you two. *Takes out her hanky and starts aiming her snot all over the couch and television. *

Kisa: Don't you need to get everything planned first?

Yuki & Kyou: ...

Shigure: Who's gonna be the groom's best man?

Yuki: Oh we decided it would be Akito-san!

Everyone: O_O *takes a step back*

Shigure: Wait, who's gonna pay for everything?

Kyou: Don't worry about that. We got it all covered.

Momiji & Kisa: I can't believe I'm attending a gay marriage! This is so humiliating!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Runs into the closet and starts swearing. *

~ * The Next Day * ~

Everyone spent hours on planning what kind of cake they should get, suits, dresses, limousine, guesses, and the location of Yuki and Kyou's marriage.

Shigure: Last chance. Are you POSSITIVE that you want to get married and become gay?

Yuki & Kyou: YES!!!!

~ * The Day of the Gay Marriage * ~

Relatives after relatives arrived to the church. Some were disgusted by the idea that Yuki and Kyou were getting married others seemed happy and proud that they were getting along so well... TOO well. The limousine arrived. The driver opened the door and out came rolling a red carpet. Yuki stepped out of the car; he was wearing a white tuxedo. Yuki walked down the aisle with his arms around Shigure's. At this point, the organ is to be played and behind Yuki and Shigure were the two flower girls, Hiro and Kisa.

Kisa: This is stupid!

Hiro: Lalala. "I love you, you love me, let's all--

Kisa: --'KILL BARNEY, YES I KNOW, NOW WOULD YOU PLEASE SHUT UP!!!

When everyone arrived to the front they were already arranged where they were standing. Along the left side of the aisle were Kisa, Hiro, Momiji, Ritsu and Haru. Along the right were Hatori, Ayame, Shigure, the Best Man Akito, and of course the Groom's Kyou and Yuki. The ceremony will now begin.

Priest: We are all gathered here to....

Akito: Lalalalala! I can fly! Look at me! Look at me mommy! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! I like your dress. Do you like my dress? Lalalallalalalala! I....

Priest: GUARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We cannot continue with this... this interference!!! Take this fool to the Mental Hospital, NOW!

Akito: I LOVE YOU!!

Akito's mother: That's the sweetest thing my son has ever said ever since he was born *sniff*

Everyone: *silence*

Priest: Now where were we? Ah yes... ahem, as I was saying. We are all gathered here to celebrate the marriage of Yuki and Kyou. We all know that...

Black Haru: Hurry up old man! I have a birthday party to attend to! Can't you see you just wasted five minutes of my precious lifetime!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SPEED-IT-UP!!!!!!!!!!!!

Priest: Why I have not been so offended in my entire life! You are a disgrace upon the great gods! I clams justice!

Yuki: Um... not to be rude or anything but you are a bit slow. Can you just get on the part where we say 'I do'?

Priest: You people have no loyalty to the gods! You will pay!

Kyou: *Snaps his finger then 50 personal guards come in* Take him away.

Priest: The gods will surely punish thy who deceive him. Curse you! Curse you all! Let the darkness swallow you! CURSE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~ * 15 Minutes Later * ~

Priest #2: All those who oppose to this marriage speak now or forever hold your peace!

?: I DO!

Everyone turn their heads around to locate where they had heard that voice. Kagura was panting as she walked up front.

Kagura: I do...... because....... KYOU'S MINE HE SHOULD MARRY ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Starts beating up Kyou*

Priest #2: STOP! GUARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hundreds of guards comes in and takes Kagura away.

Kagura: You haven't seen the last of meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! *Gives Yuki black eye*

Priest: *sigh* there goes another one. Ahem, Yuki, do you take Kyou and become his husband?

Yuki: I Do

Priest: *mumbles* you better. Now, um do you Kyou take Yuki and become his husband?

Kyou: Tse! What do you think I'm here for?

Priest: You are now gay—I mean lesbians—I mean--oh whatever, do the kissing so I can do my daily yoga........

Kyou & Yuki: ~ *. : BuSy : . * ~

Everyone: ~ * Waiting * ~

~ * 5 minutes later * ~

Kyou & Yuki: ~ * Finished * ~

The crowd gave a round of applause as Yuki and Kyou walked down the red carpet and onto the limousine.

Tohru: What happened to the rings?

Shigure: It's over! Who cares!

~ * The Next Day * ~

Shigure goes to the bank to deposit some money and...

Shigure: WHAT!?! $0.00!?!?!?!?!?!?!!

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Pleaze review! ^_^ P.S : thanu to those who reviewed my first chap! ^_~