Huge thanks to Marlou as always for beta-ing
Chapter Two
The next night Sara came into work feeling the abundance of her emotions weighing her down once more. Walking into the break room she noticed that Nick was already there and offered him a small smile.
"Hi Sara," he grinned, lifting up his mug. "I just made a fresh pot. Hey, did you get that memo about the exchange scheme?"
"Yeah," she nodded, turning away from him briefly to grab her mug.
"What do you think?"
"I haven't thought about it much," she lied, her mind screeching inside her head, yelling at her to make the decision.
"So…" he continued, sensing her avoidance of the issue. "Did you find anything on our rape case?" He asked, taking a mouthful of coffee as he waited for her to join him.
"Nope," she muttered with a groan, pulling out the seat next to his to sit down. "Grissom made me go home."
"Oh." Nick looked nervously down at the magazine on the table, his fingers folding the ends over only to straighten it and start again.
Sara watched him warily as he continued with his meticulous folding. Placing her mug on the table, she nudged his arm gently. "What's up?"
"Nothing," he told her, his reaction to her closeness causing him to jerk away quickly.
"Nick?"
"I…err…the rape case…I…" turning to her slowly he took a deep breath. "Grissom has asked me to…"
"Spit it out Nick," Sara told him, her voice rising a notch as she sat up straighter in her chair.
"He's taken you off of the case," he blurted quickly. "Catherine's working with me now." Moving back slightly he waited for the oncoming eruption, knowing that a pissed off Sara was dangerous and deadly. But she didn't move. Her eyes showed little emotion as she stared at him silently.
"I see." She muttered restraining her anger to swallow it down as she silently pushed her chair back, away from the table.
"You're angry," Nick stated, reaching out to take a hold of her arm before she could move away from him.
Sara lowered her gaze to his eyes and then down to his hand on her arm. Moving her other hand to his, she lifted his fingers one by one, removing his burning touch from her skin. "Contrary to what you all believe Nick, I can separate my emotions from my work."
"Sara, wait, maybe he thought he had good reason to take you off the case," Nick theorized.
"Oh yeah well you would agree wouldn't you Nick," she told him calmly. "You already got the promotion, you don't have to agree with every decision he makes, you know?"
"Sara," he told her quickly as she moved towards the door, stopping briefly before turning back to look at him. "You're my friend and you know I support you right?"
Sara's eyes clouded over with emotion as she nodded slowly before turning around to walk out of the door. She needed to regain her composure and hide the burning hurt and anger that rose up inside her chest. If she lost control and showed everyone how weak and tortured her true self was, how could she gain anyone's respect ever again? If Grissom wanted to inflict further pain upon her then she would take it and add it to all the other memories of rejection and agony that were building inside the darkest reaches of her mind. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing how broken she was.
Walking into the woman's washroom, she walked over to the large mirror that hung above the row of sinks and reached down to the tap to run some water into her hand. The cold liquid soothed her burning palms and she bent over to splash the cool droplets over her face. She could feel hot tears pricking her eyes, but she blinked them back in a furious attempt to keep them at bay. She had to be strong; she had to show everyone that she was unaffected. She could crumble later when shift was over, but for now, she would show them all.
More and more the opportunity to take part in Cavello's new CSI exchange program was becoming more and more appealing. Reaching down into her jacket pocket she pulled out the letter from the Director and read it over again. Maybe this was what she needed, a total break away from everyone so she could regroup her emotions and banish Gil Grissom from her heart forever.
Turning the letter over in her hand, she took a pen out of her pocket and began writing her acceptance to the opportunity. "The sooner the better," she muttered to herself as she folded the letter back up again and shoved it into her pocket.
Taking one last look at her reflection in the mirror, she turned away and headed back towards the door and out into the empty corridor. Deciding to set the wheels into motion, she headed down the corridor towards Robert Cavello's office with a new resolution firmly set in her heart.
When she came back into the break room a short time later, everyone was already there waiting for her. Grissom looked up as she entered and started to take in a deep breath before he could trust his own voice. "Sara, I have decided that Catherine will be working with Nick on the rape case as of now."
Sara came over to the table and pulled out a chair to sit down. "Fine," she told him, congratulating herself for containing her biting anger that ached to roar free and burst through her senses.
Her coolness threw everyone slightly, both Catherine and Grissom expecting her to turn into an exploding firecracker at any moment, but she refused to let them have the satisfaction. She kept her eyes carefully avoided from everyone, knowing too well that all attention was now focused on her. Grissom let out a shuddered breath; exchanging glances with Catherine as both she and Nick stood up to leave the room quietly. Turning to Warrick he handed him a slip of paper, "You're with me. We've got a DB at the Tangiers, suspicious circumstances."
"Okay I'll grab my stuff," he nodded, offering Sara a smile before he left them alone inside the room.
"Look Sara," Grissom started. "I know you must be angry…"
"What's my assignment?" she asked abruptly, cutting him off in mid sentence.
"You were becoming too involved, I had to remove you."
"Fine," she nodded, keeping her emotions in check as she pushed back her chair to stand up and face him. "Do I have an assignment or have you got something else intended for me to work on?"
Grissom's heart pounded in his ears as he resigned himself to the fact that the abyss between them had breached even wider now. Lifting up a sheet of paper he handed it to her. "You're solo. Breaking and Entering."
"Thanks," she muttered, taking the paper from his hands and turning away.
"Brass will meet you there," he called to her retreating form. "Sara?"
Stopping in her tracks, she turned to face him, waiting for him to speak. His mouth opened and closed a few times before he opted for offering her a hint smile, hoping to receive one in return, but she left the room quickly, a quiet goodbye on her lips.
Grissom stared after the empty void that she had left behind and drew in a shaky breath. Somehow he had managed to place further distance between them, and he was unsure if they would ever be able to recover.
tbc
