A/N: the only thing that belongs to me is the word "cauffered"

April 13, 1610

O Diary---

Thou must feel mine grand, unadultered happiness as I sit. As I press quill to parchment. O, how pleased I be---! Who did I see, but with mine own eyes, nay as far as a single fort'night to stand garbed in the thick aroma of midnight? Hamlet! He did hence tell my lowly self – O diary! A gala of mourning and deceit if ever one to be laid upon! By the hand of mere Claudius came such a deed! Claudius who, in his own set of righteousness, has not the honor to be called King Majesty.

So, lo! What dear Hamlet hath done but come to me for mine eyes, but yay, what large manner of things I can think of to use them on besides! Oh, to spy in a such a way would be worse than treason. Worth punishment, for what punishment could better the agony that I am befitted with as of yet?

To spy, Hamlet asked on a lesser charge, to watch his Royal Fool for reaction. See reply on his face of the words that do not tip his tongue. And yay I did. I watched with silent eyes and heard what was spoken in silent volumes.

For thus a rocky start, mine eyes, the treacherous orbs, disobeyed and watched my Lord Hamlet. Head in the lap of that vile wretched drab who swooned and cauffered as a old ruffled hen. "Oh lie in my lap? O dear no, my Lord! I am far too priggish for that deed, my Lord!"And so off at you I shall, but also be appeased for you know not what you decline…!

But start then did the play before my thoughts took action to their devious will.

Upon the poisoning, I took note -with slight glee on this black day- as the eyes of not-King Claudius growing to large incestuous orbs… as his brow raised to touch upon the high line of his mane… In a blasting rush his guilt strewn itself in open air and then his face narrowed and he stood and demanded the light. Light! Light! Upon this day, light has already been shed in the weak darkness! Nay but one ounce more and all shall die of over-exposure!

Fare Thee Well,

Horatio