Thank you for all of your reviews and to Marlou and Burked for beta-ing

Chapter Twenty

Time seemed to slow down while they held each other on the small couch. Sara's sobs had lost their heaviness, only to merge into soundless, shaking quakes. Grissom held her close to him, her sadness causing his own heart to break with remorse. He had witnessed first hand the power of her unhappiness and it shook him to his core. The harder she sobbed the tighter he held her. He was determined more than ever that she would understand once and for all how much he loved her.

She shifted against him to lean into his warmth, her whole body craving his touch as she buried herself deeper into his chest. Her head moved so she was cradled beneath his chin, seeking his comfort as her sobs slowly died away to hiccups. Closing her eyes, she clung to him, desperate for his healing presence to banish every ounce of sorrow from her heart.

Grissom slid one of his hands up to her shoulder, his soothing touch sending waves of comfort through her tired body. He wanted to hold her close and keep her safe forever, to banish the demons that he had created. Leaning down slightly he kissed her hair and tilted up her chin so he could get a better look at her face.

"Honey, you okay?" he asked quietly as his breath fanned her face softly.

"Tired," she sighed, keeping her eyes closed so she wouldn't have to see the obvious disappointment in his eyes. She had broken; her defensive walls tumbled around her to leave her vulnerable against him. He'd witness just how weak she actually was, so there was no point anymore in pretending.

Grissom gazed down at her in awe. Her face was pale and streaked with tears, but to him she had never looked more beautiful. He fought the urge to kiss her, her lips calling to him begging him to do the one thing that he had wanted to do so badly since coming here. Lifting a shaky hand to her face, he touched her skin with a feather light touch stroking a finger across her damp cheek. He wanted her to feel safe with him; he wanted her to know that he wouldn't cause her any more pain. Caressing her face gently, he hoped the touch would entice her to open her eyes. When she leaned into his hand and a sigh escaped her lips, he found his voice once more. "Sara?"

"Hmmm?" she mumbled as she burrowed herself into his warmth, her entire being content to stay in his arms.

"Do you want me to leave?"

Sara's eyes snapped open with his words and looked up to gaze into his eyes. The thought of him leaving her had suddenly become almost terrifying and sparked a fresh onslaught of tears to her eyes. Swallowing them back, she tried to keep her voice calm as she spoke. "Do you want to leave?"

"No," he whispered, his voice catching in his throat as he shook his head. "I would understand if you didn't want me here…I…"

"Stay," she told him quickly breaking off his words. "Please."

Grissom swore his heart stopped beating the second she uttered those words. Her acceptance of him warmed his whole existence and he thanked the heavens for her forgiveness. He smiled down at her as he tightened his hold on her body. "I'll stay with you, but you should sleep."

"So should you." She whispered as she shifted slightly, pulling away from his embrace to stand up and face him. Her mind told her that everything about this encounter could lead to disaster, but her heart told her to trust him. Despite all that he had done in the past, the only truth that had kept her whole throughout this entire nightmare was her trust.

Grissom felt her withdrawal deeper than anything he had ever experienced before. His heart sank into his stomach when she left his warmth and he looked up at her worriedly while she regarded him with all-seeing eyes. When he finally thought he would melt under her gaze, she did something that almost shattered his self-control. She held out her hand to him.

"We're both tired," she told him softly, her voice hesitant for a moment until she once again found her strength. "Come to bed."

Grissom's mouth suddenly became dry as he tried to make sense of her words. When she stepped a little closer to him, she offered him a shy smile. "Sleep with me Grissom, just sleep. I don't have anything else to offer you right now."

Her words caused a jolt of lingering passion to fire up inside his heart. He loved her so much, and what he felt for her went far deeper than anything purely physical. She needed his comfort just as much as he needed hers and he lifted his hand to wrap his fingers around hers. "That's all we both have to offer right now Sara," he whispered.

"Then come to bed," she told him softly as she pulled him up from the couch to lead him towards the bedroom, clicking the kitchen light off along the way.

Sara held onto his hand as she led him into the darkened bedroom, her warmth giving him the courage to comfort her. Releasing his hand, he watched as she slipped the robe from her shoulders and climbed into bed to wait for him. His whole body shook as he walked around to the other side of the bed to tentatively sit down on the edge. He shakily removed his shoes and looked down at himself. He was still fully dressed, and he couldn't decide if he should lay down with her in his full attire or strip down. Sensing a shift behind him, he started to turn around but stilled when he felt her warm hand on his back.

"What's wrong?" she asked in a whisper.

"Uh…I'm a little overdressed for bed…"

"Then undress," she told him tiredly, her fingers gliding down his back to fall away as she lay back down. "For once in your life don't over analyse this."

Her words struck a chord inside him and he suddenly realized how trite his actions were becoming. He owed her this part of himself; she needed to feel his attachment to her as well as his physical body. Before he could change his mind, he started to undo his shirt buttons one by one until he let it slip to the floor. Standing up, he unbuckled his belt and faltered slightly before removing his pants and socks until he was clad only in his boxers. Lowering his eyes, he looked over her face once again, seeking acceptance.

Sara could feel his resolve slipping and held her hand to him, urging him to lay with her. For a moment she thought he might actually turn and flee, but when he took hold of her hand and lowered himself onto the bed, she felt every ounce of denial come crashing down around her. She loved him, body and soul, and nothing would ever change that.

Grissom lay down onto the bed and pulled the covers up over his torso before turning to her and lifting one of his arms. She shifted a little closer, lowering her head onto his chest and wrapping an arm around his waist. When he lowered his arm to encase it around her shoulders, he heard and felt the deep sigh that escaped her lips.

"Goodnight Grissom," she smiled softly, her eyes already closing while her body drank his warmth greedily.

"Goodnight Sara," he whispered, his lips grazing her forehead before he closed his eyes and allowed her tenderness to sink him into slumber beside her.

The first thing Grissom became aware of a few hours later was how incredibly warm he felt. For a few seconds he thought he'd woken up from a wonderful dream in which the warmth still embraced him, but slowly as he opened his eyes, he remembered where he was and whom he was with. Shifting slightly, he looked down towards the woman who was still asleep beside him. They had shifted in their sleep so that they were both on their sides and he had both of his arms wrapped possessively around her stomach while his legs spooned against hers.

A feeling of contentment washed over him and he suddenly couldn't remember anything that had felt so wonderful in his life before. Breathing deeply, her scent invaded his senses, causing him to possessively pull her closer to his body, his need to feel her closeness overwhelming every other conscious thought. Time had seemed to stop, enclosing them into a world of their own where nothing else existed but them. He knew that after tonight, nothing would compare to the feeling of having her in his arms, safe and warm where nothing or no one could hurt her for the time being.

Sara started to stir beside him, her contented sigh rasping from her lips as her fingers threaded through his on her stomach. She mumbled something as she started to wake and pushed herself further back into his body. Slowly, as she opened her eyes, thoughts of the previous night started to seep back into her consciousness and her hand stilled on his.

"Morning," he whispered, trying to soften the blow of the ominous morning after. Even though they had done nothing sexual to have conflicting feelings of regret, he still worried that she would withdraw from him, or worse still, forget everything they sought to achieve last night.

Taking a deep breath, Sara turned in his arms to face him. Blinking the tiredness from her eyes she offered him what she hoped was a reassuring smile. "Hey."

Relief flooded Grissom's eyes and he found himself breaking into a warm smile. Lifting a hand, he traced the outline of her face and leaned forward to press a light kiss on her forehead. "Feeling better?"

Sara could feel the swell of her affection combating her resolve to keep things purely emotional between them, offering herself to him would be disastrous right now, when neither of them was ready to embark on something physical. Too much had happened between them to simply brush aside, but for now, what they had was worth everything.

"I think you are better for me than any sleeping aid," she smiled.

"Really?" he grinned, his eyes gazing over her features as his fingers continued to stroke her skin.

"Oh yeah, that's the best night's sleep I've had in a very long time." She could see the love in his eyes now as he watched her with such adoration, and for a moment she sought to bathe in his watchful gaze. Her feelings were conflicting as she suddenly found herself drawn to his lips, seeking out the essence that embraced her, but she stopped herself from the abyss before she slid over the edge.

Lifting herself up on one elbow, she smiled down at him as his hand came up to frame her cheek. Turning her head slightly, she kissed his fingers before pulling herself up. "Are you hungry?"

Her departure left him feeling cold, but he knew she was still with him, buried deep inside his heart. Lying back onto his side, he returned her smile. "I am."

"How about I find us something to eat?" Climbing out of bed, she pulled her robe around her body and padded towards the door. She stopped and turned, gazing at him with adoration before leaving him alone in the bed.

Grissom groaned softly when she left, his heart aching with her absence. Sitting up, he slid his legs over the side of the bed and reached for his pants. Pulling them on, he stood up and made his way towards the kitchen.

Despite his fears, as the morning wore on Grissom felt incredibly relaxed. She'd greeted him with a beaming smile when he'd entered the kitchen, her obvious happiness brightening his soul. They had talked about non-essential things, just as they had always done in the past before the last year had all but erased their connection. Grissom knew that they needed to talk about the past, and in some aspects to help close the wounds that he had managed to inflict.

Walking into the living room with his coffee, he sat down tentatively beside her. She looked up to offer him a warm smile as he picked up the newspaper that was laid crumpled up on the middle cushion between them and held it up in front of his eyes, anything to stop the compelling urges his body was causing him to feel.

Sara closed the small distance to sit beside him on the couch while she sipped her coffee. She could feel him shaking, and while he was incredibly cute, she couldn't help but watch him with an amused smile while he pretended to read.

"You know it would probably make more sense if you actually read the news instead of the advertisements," she told him, her growing smile beaming towards him as he lowered the paper to look at her. "But if you want to read about…" leaning over his shoulder to read one of the boxes, "Uh…cosmetic surgery, then this is probably for you!"

 "Oh," he whispered as a warm blush rose up his cheeks. Seeking a diversion, he looked over towards the large clock on the wall and groaned lightly. "I should go in soon, I told Detective Miller that I'd be there by 11 a.m."

"Oh don't mind Jimmy," she smiled, "he's a sweetheart when you get to know him."

"To you maybe," he told her, a mock scowl on his face. "I doubt he'll be interested if I tried my best smile on him."

"Get outta here," she grinned widely as she turned to him. "Gil Grissom, you have a best smile?"

"You are so amusing," he told her, his voice wavering as he tried not to smile. This was a side of her he had very rarely seen, and he had to admit that he liked being with her like this. Looking down at himself he sighed heavily, "I think I should call a taxi, I really should go and change these clothes"

Sitting up beside him, Sara leaned into him before pulling herself up to stand before him. "I'll drive you."

"I can't ask you to do that Sara, you should be resting."

"You didn't ask me, I offered," she told him softly. "I'm surprised Andrew didn't lend you a car."

"He has, but I couldn't pick it up until today." Standing up beside her he gave in to the compulsion to touch her. His fingers grazed her arm and his gaze locked with hers as everything they needed to tell each other was conveyed in one simple touch.

"Let me drive you to the hotel first and then we'll go to the lab," she told him, her need to be with him for a little while longer urging her closer.

"Okay," he whispered, his eyes following her as she broke away from him to grab her keys from the counter. She moved with such grace and beauty, commanding his full attention while he almost lost himself in her presence. He had missed her so much over the past three months, and seeing her now, being close to her, he knew he couldn't ever be without her again.

"You okay?" she asked softly as she came to him worriedly.

"What?" he muttered, her closeness jolting him out of his reverie. "Oh…yeah…I'm fine."

"You sure? You kind of zoned out on me there for a second." Sara regarded him with concerned eyes and reached out to place a reassuring hand on his arm.

"I'm fine," he smiled softly, his hand covering hers to squeeze her fingers. "I was just wondering if you still wanted to have dinner tonight."

Her face lit up in a bright smile. "Of course. Why don't you come over when you're done for the day and I'll cook us something to eat?"

"That sounds good," he nodded, excited by the prospect of her company for another evening.

Nodding her assent, she released his arm and walked over towards the door and waited for him to follow. They had overcome a huge obstacle in their tenuous relationship, one that would unite them in strength and affection. As he followed her out of the door, Sara suddenly realized she hadn't been this happy for a very long time.

TBC