Chapter 40
Thirty minutes later, Kevin still sat at the cafeteria table where Alexis
abruptly left him. He was afraid he may have said too much and drove her
completely away from him again. Staring at the cup of coffee in front of him he
was unaware that Sonny had entered the room until he sat across from him.
"Looks like you got a problem, Kev?"
"Alexis just left. I think I went a bit too far with her."
"Why? What did you say to her?"
"In effect, I told her if she would stop running from the truths of her
life she could probably find a way to handle them better."
"Let me guess. She got real angry
and left you sitting here cooling your heels, but not before shutting down on
you though, right?"
"Yes. But, you knew that would happen didn't you?"
"Yea. You're not close enough to her, you don't have enough time... enough
care invested in her to be able to get away with a comment like that no matter
how much trouble she's in."
Kevin
exhaled with a great deal of frustration before settling his angry gaze on
Sonny.
"You could have warned me."
"No, I couldn't. I needed you to be the one to put words to the problem
for her. Now, hopefully I can help her deal with it. Our connection is still
there. If I'm not mistaken and I don't believe I am; she is aware of the pull
between us. And I'm counting on that to make it easier for her to talk to me
now."
"So, you used me."
Kevin was livid. It seemed that Sonny was not above using a doctor's ignorance
where his patient was concerned to further his own agenda.
"Yes. For her... I used you. Kevin, don't make the mistake of thinking I
did anything for my own selfish reasons. I know Alexis. She is not going to be
content to sit patiently by while you, Johnny or I play out our little game of
'how easy we can make it for her'. She doesn't want easy; she doesn't want
therapy. She wants out of here the fastest way possible. And she knows that the
only way she is going to accomplish that is getting her memory back. I am her
past and I am her future. Somewhere in that complicated, confused mind of hers
she knows that. I just have to help her realize it now."
"You've got quite an exalted opinion of yourself where Alexis is
concerned. I hate to burst your little
bubble, but let me play devil's advocate for a minute. Just how do you think she is going to react
once she gets her memory back and finds that her 'friend' Sonny was
instrumental in her fall?"
Sonny
leaned back, pushing his hands into his pockets and smiled as though he
possessed the secrets of the world.
"We'll work it out. Alexis has a very forgiving heart once she has all the
facts. Right now, she doesn't have the facts. She and I will put it all
together and together we will work it all out."
Standing up, Sonny looked across the table at Kevin and suddenly felt a sense
of regret at having not been totally honest with him.
"Kevin, you deserved better than this. I can't apologize for the outcome.
But I can apologize for going behind your back and creating a tough situation
for you. I hope you can understand that I only did what I thought was best for
Alexis. You have to know that I will do whatever I can to give her what she
needs so she can leave here as quickly as possible."
Kevin stood and slid his chair under the table then looked back at Sonny. The
man did know Alexis better than anyone and probably knew what it was going to
take to help her pull herself back together. Understanding that though did not
make him any less angry at being used to further a cause he had been unaware
of.
"Did you not think that I would understand what you were up to and that
just maybe I could have provided a little more to the situation given the
chance?"
"I couldn't take a chance on you throwing a wrench into the plan. I need
her angry enough to turn to me for the release she needs, and if her anger is
directed toward you or Johnny; so much the better. Like I have said before, Kevin... I love her, I want her well,
and I will do what has to be done for her to be well and I don't care who I
step on in the process."
Kevin
threw his hands up in exasperation.
"I seriously don't get you people. You act as if the medical profession is
no more than a vehicle to progress your own plans. You get into trouble and you
come running to us just long enough to get past the immediate danger then you
take off on your own to try to resolve the remaining issues without any
guidance whatsoever. Do you think you're fit enough to handle your own issues
as well as hers, Sonny?"
"No, that's why I still want to continue our sessions. But, Alexis is a
different story. Do I think she needs to open up a little and have a few
sessions with you to deal with her problems? Absolutely. But, she has to first
be willing to admit that she can't handle things on her own. And she is just not
there yet. I don't know if she ever will be. She is a very private person and
the events of her life have left her so scarred that she is adamantly opposed
to voicing them to you or anyone else much less dwelling on them herself. She's always known she could talk to me… she
still knows it."
Kevin sighed heavily as he glanced around the room. He felt like a reject; an
obsolete model in the profession he had chosen. Returning his focus to Sonny,
he gave up the fight.
"You win. But, could I possibly ask that you at least give me the benefit
of the doubt next time. You never know, I just may want her as well as you
do."
"Ok. Now, I have to get ready for a certain visit from a certain
lady."
"You expecting to see Alexis again today?"
"After her encounter with you, I expect she'll come looking for me."
"You sound pretty sure of yourself."
"I'll let you know when I see you in the morning, that is if you still
want me to show for my session."
"See you in the morning, Sonny."
With that Kevin walked away leaving Sonny smiling in hopeful expectation of an
afternoon with Alexis.
___________________
Just as Alexis finished cleaning up her mess of broken glass, she heard Johnny
and Joy returning from their time out. Seeing the look on both of their faces
alerted her to a change in them.
"What's up with you two? You look like you've both won the jackpot."
Walking over to Alexis, Joy held out her hand to show Alexis.
"I did. I won the jackpot."
Seeing the ring on Joy's finger, Alexis threw her arms around Joy and hugged
her tightly.
"Oh how wonderful, Joy. You got the prize. I wish you and Johnny all the
best."
Looking up at the blush on Johnny's face she let go of Joy and asked her
permission to congratulate the groom.
"Now that he is officially taken, can I hug him Joy?"
"I think you would offend him if you didn't."
Alexis walked over to Johnny and stopped by his side. With tears in her eyes
she reached up and drew him into a tender embrace.
"Johnny, I'm so happy for you. Always stay true to one another. Don't let
anything come between you and Joy. Keep your love for her first in your life. I
am certainly going to miss you, my friend."
"Miss me? Where are you going?"
Johnny pulled her arms from around his neck and looked closely at her.
"Did something happen while I was out?"
"No. But, you and Joy need to start your own life together now and you
don't need an albatross around your neck while you do it."
Johnny took hold of her arms and peered at her intently.
"Alexis, Joy and I have already discussed this and we are not leaving here
unless you walk out with us. And there's nothing more to be said about it. You
are family. You are a part of us... a part that I'm not willing to leave here
without. Joy understands and feels the same way I do. So that discussion is
closed."
"But, Johnny. It's not fair to Joy or you to be stuck here with me."
Knowing that Johnny needed her help in convincing Alexis, Joy spoke up as she
walked closer and put her arm around Alexis.
"He's right, Alexis. Neither one of us want to leave here without you. And
besides, we will get a better start here than we would out there."
Alexis
stepped away from Johnny with a look of friendly tolerance on her face.
"Ok, I know when someone's pulling my leg. Just how in the world do you
figure you will get a better start in an insane asylum than out in the free
world?"
Laughing at her analogy, Joy's eyes turned to Johnny and she smiled at him
lovingly.
"Here there is just the two of us working toward a common goal. Us. Out
there, the world would interfere. We have time on our side here. And we have
you... our best friend. Don't ask us to walk away, Alexis. We can't. You mean
too much to both of us. We know we have your blessing over our marriage, but we
would also like your blessing over how we choose to spend our time of
engagement."
As Alexis listened to Joy, she felt as if someone were giving her a precious
gift. And the tears came as she reached to hug them both.
"I'll support you whatever you want. You two are very special to me. My
blessing is yours in every way. Now, I'm going to leave you two alone and go
take a walk."
She no sooner closed the door behind her and taken a few steps when Johnny
appeared by her side.
"Something did happen while I was out, didn't it? Talk to me,
partner."
She shrugged her shoulders in an effort to dismiss the incident so Johnny
wouldn't become any more concerned than he already was.
"Just a run-in with Kevin that left me a bit on edge. That's all. Nothing to get upset about."
Lifting his hand that held a stray piece of broken glass he smiled with
understanding.
"He get out of line again?"
Smiling at his perception she whispered. "A little."
"Off to find a sounding board, maybe?
Alexis looked down. As the smile left her face she shifted nervously.
"I'm sorry, Johnny. It just seems easier somehow to talk to him. I don't
understand it at all. But, for some reason it just seems like he understands
without me even opening my mouth. I don't mean to hurt you and I know I can
talk to you anytime, but it's... please don't be hurt, Johnny."
"Shhh. Alexis... hey, this is me. I'm the one that wants the best for you
and if talking to Sonny makes it easier for you then I'm all for it. Go on...
you're a smart lady who knows what she needs. Take care of that lady. I'll be
here if you need me. I told you it's always been about what's best for you. I'm
not hurt, just glad you have someone you feel comfortable talking to."
"You know him don't you, Johnny? You know Sonny."
Johnny reached down and took both of her hands in his and met her gaze
unwaveringly.
"Yes, Alexis. I know Sonny."
"Can he hurt me, Johnny? Does he know enough about me to hurt me?"
"Alexis, I will tell you that I know Sonny well enough to know that he
wants you out of here as much as you and I do. He wants your freedom from this
place just as much and he will do whatever you need him to do to help you
accomplish that goal."
"But, you know a lot more than that, don't you? I want just one more question
answered, Johnny. And I need the truth. Were Sonny and I friends at one
time?"
"Yes."
"Thank you for being honest with me. I had already felt some sort of...
well whatever, but I needed it confirmed. Thank you."
"Still going to see him?"
"Yes. He is a very... compelling man. I need someone to talk to about
something and for some reason I think he will understand."
"Can I just ask that you tread carefully?"
Reaching up to kiss his cheek, she lay the palm of her hand against his other.
"Johnny, I have even more reason now to make sure that all goes well. I
have to make sure that you and Joy are successful in your first patient
collaboration. Now go, be with your fiancée. I'll be back later."
"See ya later, partner."
Watching as he walked back toward the door she called out to him.
"Johnny... I am happy for you and I want you to know that you are one of
my truest friends. I love you both very much."
"Thanks, Alexis. The feeling is mutual."
